AN: I've realized that this fic really needs a disclaimer… so here it is: I always forget to do author's notes about the dialogue… in a few of the 'House and Cameron are friends and it's awesome' scenes, it's actually House and Wilson dialogue… I'm sure I will continue to do this throughout.. I know I will… in this chapter, I put Cameron in a House-Wilson conversation… Also, I assume those of you reading actually watch the show and know that I use dialogue from it while changing things here and there to fit the Camteen/Cadley aspect… Obviously I'm not one that owns the show or wrote the original dialogue, but I love it too much not to put it in an episode based fic… Anyways… carry on…

97 Seconds

'She moved to the 'danglers'… she thinks that the women will lose.' Thirteen text her girlfriend quickly and before she knew it, she was getting an answer back.

'Honey, you're not going to lose. House won't let you. You're much too perfect for the job…' Remy started just a bit too long… when she looked up, one of the twins was looking at her. She just swallowed air and walked in time with Taub and Kutner to House's office, despite them being on different teams.

~0~0~0~0~0~

Cameron saw her out of the corner of her eye… she knew it was about to get interesting. She couldn't decide if she was going to trade on her girlfriend to challenge her a bit, or if she wasn't going to give this little blonde bitch the time of day… She decided on the former because she knew her girlfriend loved the challenge.

So, she finished her chart and walked over to the nurses station, but in passing she caught a man playing with the cut on his arm, "Hey! Stop playing with your sutures or I'll have to redo them." She finished making her way to the station when the other doctor came up to her.

"Why do you guys keep a 'D' cell battery in a urine specimen cup?" Amber picked up the cup and inspected it.

"Because we pulled it from a patient's intestine." Cameron sighed, picking up another chart.

"Why would somebody swallow a battery?"

She smirked, "Why do you assume it was swallowed?" She stopped a nurse in passing, "Bed 5 needs a bag of Ringer's Lactate." She began walking to another bed.

"Would have been worse if he'd used a 9-volt."

Cameron's smirk turned to a grin, "Who said it was a 'he'?"

"False assumptions. You're good. You're trying to get me to think like him."

"And you're trying to kiss my ass." She stopped abruptly and turned to Amber staring her straight in the eyes, "Why are you talking to me?"

"Because House is turning patient care into a game. It's dangerous. The patient's going to suffer - maybe die."

After the rest of their conversation, she took her phone out, 'Okay… so… That little blonde bitch on the boys team got to me… Just thought you should know you're now being challenged… I let her think she appealed to my need to protect the patients from House's… Houseness, but I really just wanted to have a little fun… so you could have a little fun.'

A minute or two later, she received a text back, 'Gee, thanks Babe!—and I text that with all the sarcasm in the world.' She smirked and continued on with her job.

~0~0~0~0~0~

After listening to House badger Brennan a while longer, she decided to move the conversation forward and focus on the patient, "This is not a new symptom. Our patient has Spinal Muscular Atrophy. He has documented trouble swallowing. The choking is not new."

"So if it's nothing new, what caused the old?" House asked.

"Strongyloides worms explain the fainting. We already treated—"

"So, he's all better, Woman Who..." He gave her a look, as he couldn't think of anything to make fun of her with, "Thirteen."

"Hasn't gotten any worse."

House kept his stare on her as he tried yet another approach at knowing her secret, "That's a pretty passive approach for the daughter of an alcoholic."

Thirteen sighed, "Wrong again."

~0~0~0~0~0~

As all of the team came into the room and saw House wearing a blue towel as a bandana and had a row of Bunsen burners lit with large blue flames, they knew it was elimination time.

"Thank you all for coming... to Tribal Council." He looked at Cole, "Man of your integrity, I feel I can trust... Big Love. And I don't call you that because you are a Mormon." He gave an exaggerated wink in a joking gesture, "So, where's your team's sixth man?"

"She went rogue. Broke the rules."

"You also sinned. You have no right to cast the first stone."

"And atheists have no right to quote Scripture."

"The rules said 'no talking'."

"I told her not to talk."

"Out loud."

Taub interjected, "We were trying to save a man's life."

House turned to him, "Key word being 'trying'. Tilt table test confirmed that you guys were wrong. You're fired."

Then men all began to sigh, but Amber walked in just at the perfect moment.

"Ah, the Prodigal Son returneth. You're also fired."

"We thought there was a tumor on the patient's esophagus. We were right about the area, wrong about the diagnosis. Turns out the esophagus is just straightening. It's scleroderma. It explains the syncope and the choking. He needs steroids."

Thirteen wanted to punch that bitch in the face, "You did a CT scan?"

"Obviously."

"After you were already proven wrong?"

"Good for you. It's too bad you're wrong. Straightening indicates weakening, not hardening. SMA explains the weakening. Strongyloides infection explains everything else." He gestured to the women's team, "You ladies have the honor to give the patient a feeding tube, discharge him, and show up for work tomorrow. The rest of you... you're a disappointment. You make me want to stop dangling."

Thirteen and everyone else began to file out.

~0~0~0~0~0~

Cameron and Chase were walking to the exit for no other reason than they ran into each other in the lobby, and Cameron was too polite to ignore him… This was when House started yelling at them from behind.

"I could have you fired!"

Chase was the one to talk… seeing as Cameron had no idea what was going on, "You've already had me fired."

"Which proves that I can."

"Were the men wrong?"

"No. That doesn't change the fact..."

"Why are you yelling at me?"

"Because performing tests for someone who is not a doctor in this hospital..."

"You're frustrated. If you want help, I'm here. If you just need to vent... leave a message." He turned and left.

House stared at Cameron as she leaned forward and took a step toward him in concern, "House… it wasn't what you thought it was. Don't take it out on the person you fired. But he's right. You want help? We are here…" She glanced behind him and saw her girlfriend coming at them with that determined look on her face… she knew she had to make herself scarce otherwise House would have them figured out in half a second… so she turned and walked away.

~0~0~0~0~0~

Wilson and Cameron were in the room when House finally came to. Cameron was sitting on the bed and Wilson was standing at the foot of it, "You're an idiot." The blonde started almost slapping his face… almost.

"You nearly killed yourself." Wilson added.

"That was the whole idea."

"You wanted to kill yourself?" Cameron looked at him.

"I wanted to nearly kill myself. Is he... better?"

Wilson gave him a look, "No. But he doesn't have cancer. We think it might be eosinophilic pneumonia." He stopped and turned to look at him again, "Maybe you didn't want to die, but you didn't care if you lived."

"You insisted that I needed to see for myself." House said like the jackass he knew they loved. "What, was he discharged?" He asked after a second thought.

"No. He's dying. You've already had two near-death experiences."

"Not that guy. The guy in the car accident. With the knife. I... I need to talk to him."

Cameron knit her brows, "He... died almost an hour ago. Apparently, it's bad to electrocute yourself within days of suffering massive internal injuries. Why did you need to talk to him? Did you... see... something?"

~0~0~0~0~0~

Thirteen was sitting by Starks sewn body. She was just… staring. Fixating more so. She couldn't believe that she didn't watch him take the pills. She heard the door open and the already family thump-step of House's cane.

She spoke softly, "As soon as the pathologist cut into the lungs, we saw the threadworms."

"You think it's fair that I fired all the other members of your team when you guys actually came up with the right diagnosis?" House asked her in the same calm tone.

After House was standing next to her, she started speaking, not answering his question, but speaking, "I keep replaying it in my mind. Did I drop the pills when I put them on the bed tray? Did I knock them over when I turned to leave?"

"You know he'd be alive… His dog'd be alive."

Thirteen grit her teeth and flared her nostrils, "I know."

House walked around to the other side of Stark and stared at her, "You forced us to act on a false assumption."

"I know."

"Everything we built from that step on. Every test. Every theory. Every treatment."

Thirteen's emotions got the better of her for a moment. She looked at him heatedly, "I know! Forget the lecture and fire me already!"

"If I was going to fire you, I wouldn't be giving you the lecture. I know you're not going to let anything like this ever happen again…. I'll see you tomorrow."

Thirteen nods then after a moment she gets up and leaves.

~0~0~0~0~0~

She walked into Allison's apartment. She shut and locked the door and saw her girlfriend still up, waiting for her. She dropped her stuff and kicked her shoes off and paced a moment or two before she turned to her, "I called T-O-D today… It was my fault he died." She had a sad smile on her face, "See, I didn't make sure that he took the pills… I set them on the tray… and I didn't make sure he took them.." She was staring off into space at this point, "He would have been fine… If I had just made sure he took his meds."

Allison made quick work when she saw her girlfriend's knees buckle. She caught her just before the brunette would have gotten some nice bruises to add to the day. She held her close as Remy broke. She didn't tell her to calm down or shush her soothingly, she only held her and kept her close.

Remy pulled from her lover and wiped her eyes, "He fired the rest of my team… and I get to go back tomorrow even though it was my fault." Allison held her tight. "It was my fault."

After another minute or so, Allison decided she could say what she was going to say and Remy not refuse it immediately, "Honey… you know why you get to go back, right?" Remy looked up at her, tears forming once more, but Allison knew she refused to let them fall again, "You are never going to do it again… and you are brilliant and he knows it… did he talk to you at all?"

She nodded, "He said the same thing… and that he wouldn't be lecturing me if I were fired…"

Allison gave her a soft smile, "So let's go take a shower, get you cleaned up… get you some food and go to bed… You're going to have to deal with everyone and everything tomorrow…"