Disclaimer: This fan work is not in any way affiliated with the Supernatural franchise. Please enjoy.
Castiel, The One Who Fell.
.
He turned upon his back
to gaze upon the empty void,
in which once, his wings
had completed him.
Wonder.
Your soul
I see;
It's so bright,
so bright,
beautiful.
Unlike any other
being on earth.
No one more
wonderful
has graced my sight.
.
No Regrets.
Is it worth it?
You ask me,
a long time after you'd begged me to fall.
Falling?
Yes.
Worth everything
.
Castiel's true form.
Beauty, and also, a Beast
All the wars I've won,
the crusades I've waged;
All the battalions I've led,
the orders I've obeyed.
The rivers of blood i've shed,
the many enemies I've smote.
A warrior with a halo,
A soldier wielding grace.
Wars holy, and battles bloody;
My white light blinding, my six wings unfurling,
My voice shrill and my many-eyes flaming.
.
They named me Castiel
I am
a celestial being,
they call me
divinity.
I am
a colossus,
commander of garrisons.
And I am
a servant of heaven,
The angel of Thursday.
.
But now
I've blue pools for eyes;
A pair of shadows for wings,
Two arms,
Two legs,
A tie—it's quite quaint.
This intricately woven fabric, you call
a trench coat
These five-fingered hands
you prove
are more suited for healing.
.
I am
a meteorite shower
stowed in
a glass jar.
I am
a lightning bug
caught in a blowing bubble.
.
They call me Castiel
The angel that fell.
And I am
your friend
And you call me
Cas.
I am.
Say it to my face.
Rebelling
was heresy
And I am
a fallen.
Go on,
you can say it.
I am a heretic.
.
The Great Fall.
When heaven closed it's doors,
when the angels fell,
they were cast out;
banished from so-called paradise.
Entire garrisons fell from the skies
in their throngs;
their wings burning from the fall,
their eyes blinded from the world inverted;
bodies bruised from the impact,
graces scattered without vessels.
But it was not like this
When I fell.
.
Falling, for me,
was a quaintly furnished, warehouse-enclosed room.
With high renaissance art, walls adorned with gold;
and an ornamental glass platter,
filled with cheese hamburgers.
Falling, was laying eyes at my superior's feet,
answering 'yes' to orders
for the very last time.
Falling, was apologising to the righteous man,
asking forgiveness for the faults
in my obedience.
.
Falling, was watching him beg,
turning away only to be pulled back
by his sincerity;
questioning and doubting, everything.
Falling was being punched in the face,
literally,
being called a poor, stupid, son-of-a-bitch;
that I should shove my condolences
up my lily-livered ass.
.
And righteous man,
did they know;
did you know;
that every word you said to me,
every insult,
every utterance,
every plead,
Was making me fall, fall, fall.
Every time I looked into your eyes,
I was treasonous.
.
Irrevocable.
Irredeemable.
.
And then,
Falling was silencing you against a wall,
severing my flesh and drawing my blood,
finally banishing my masters, rebelling against heaven.
.
Elation.
Exasperation.
.
Falling, was pushing you away,
granting you your one shot;
The archangel,
I'll hold him off.
I'll hold them all off.
Go.
.
Falling, was having the prophet
lay his hand on my shoulder,
reassuring my decision.
My free will.
Falling, was the brightest light,
I'd ever seen
amid heaven.
.
One endless, unbroken, white.
.
I fell.
Like that.
.
Morose.
Dean Winchester
is dead.
Pain unbearable.
Grief unconsolable.
Anger uncontrollable.
Hate insatiable.
No one taught me to cry,
but look,
I've learnt how.
No one taught me to mourn,
but look,
I do nothing else.
Dean Winchester is dead.
So what point is there
to Castiel?
The Mark of Cain; All our Bane.
The mark of Cain
look what its done to you.
Tell me, does it give you pain?
Because it does for me.
You will be slain by it
sooner or later;
and so
will I.
.
Angel of the man
Where do my allegiances lie?
They ask.
To whom
have I made my pledge?
Because my loyalties have changed
they know.
Who commands me now?
Not brethren ,
Not superiors;
Not heaven,
Not hell
No, my fealty has been paid for
the moment you called me
'friend. '
My loyalty has been taken
the moment you prayed to me
as 'family'
Who am I?
Angel of the Lord no more.
Righteous man
I hear you
and I always come when you call.
Don't Go.
Humanity is fleeting
and oh
so are you.
It was only yesterday for me
When you stabbed me in my chest
and I rebelled for you.
.
You're dying
you're dying
Right in front of me.
Years have past,
but it's only been minutes for me.
Time is cruel;
Dean Winchester you'll grow old
and disappear
and how I only wish
I could disappear
with you.
.
Angel No More.
My six wings
are down to two.
The shadows reaching shorter and shorter
day by day.
My feathers are scattered,
the bones are baring
and they're almost stripped bare,
dragging on the floor.
There's a weight that's getting lighter,
I can't fly anymore;
I can hardly come when you call.
Condolences, I'm late again.
Soon, you'll be wondering
why I don't answer.
Sorry, I can't.
.
White light.
Every time my vessel is ruptured,
punctured,
broken,
breached;
a white light cascades,
and you need to shield your eyes from me.
Cas, you're hurt.
No.
I'm leaking.
Cas is the white light.
The white light is me.
And I'm bursting at the seams;
trying not to drip out of a layer of cells.
Making sure my voice doesn't revert to that shrill scream,
Working to writhe inwards back in my confines.
Sorry, my body ripped,
and I'm flooding out.
I'm an entity.
Thank you for reading! This is my longest set.
Forever exasperated that Castiel fell from heaven for a certain Winchester. Ah.
What do you think? Reviews give life. Any prompts?
-earl.