Author's Note: Sorry for the delayed update, I watched Sexy and suddenly no longer felt the need to write Brittana, but I think it's coming back, slowly. I split this chapter into two because it was getting so epically long...so this is like, half a day.
As always, I love all you beautiful, wonderful, reviewers. I'm sorry to anyone who feels like a chapter is too much Brittana or too much Faberry, it is a story about both of them, and it's hard to keep it equal in all chapters, but I think it will even out in the end! And I love your reviews anyway! Thanks for continuing to read!
Santana and Brittany rocked back and forth in the hammock in the backyard, looking out at the lake. Brittany had her back against Santana and her head in her chest, and was holding a large travel mug of coffee. Santana kissed the top of Brittany's head, and Brittany sighed contentedly. Santana took the coffee from her wife and had a sip.
"Do you think they'll be up soon?" Brittany asked, looking at her watch.
"I don't know," Santana said quietly.
"This isn't good," Brittany said.
"I know." Santana replied. She handed the coffee back to Brittany who also took a sip. Santana traced her fingers up and down Brittany's arms,
"Should we do something about it?" Brittany asked.
"I don't know," Santana said. She sighed in defeat. "I mean, there is the possibility that they just have a really unhealthy, codependent, sexless relationship in order to mask the vast desert of loneliness that is both of their lives." Brittany rolled her eyes. "But since it's sexless, they're really not doing anything that we need to talk to them about."
"But, even if it is sexless, shouldn't you still talk to Quinn?"
"Why?" Santana asked.
"Do you remember what a wreck you were when you were coming out of the closet, San? When you weren't yelling at someone you were fighting with someone, and when you weren't fighting with someone you were crying. And you were barely speaking to me, and you weren't really talking to your family. And you had a family that would accept you, you were single, and your only responsibility was school and cheerios. Imagine how Quinn must feel."
"We don't know that she's gay or even bisexual, Britt!"
"No, but we do know that she obviously has feelings for Rachel. And she's from a conservative Christian family. And she's married and she has three children, and she's potentially struggling with same issues we struggled with when we were sixteen and didn't really have another care in the world." Santana kissed her wife on the head.
"Have I ever told you that I love you?"
"No. Tell me now."
"I love you, Brittany Susan Pierce-Lopez. I can't believe I am so lucky to have had you in my life for the last twenty years."
"And the next twenty."
"And the next twenty," Santana repeated. Brittany sat up and tried to twist her body around so she could kiss Santana. "Britt! Sit still!" Santana yelled as the hammock swung violently back and forth. "BRITTANY!" The hammock flipped over and Santana and Brittany became a mess of limbs and spilled coffee. Their eyes locked and they both burst out in laughter.
"I love you," Brittany said, pulling Santana in for a kiss.
"I love you too. Even though you ruined my favorite shirt," Santana looked down at the damage done by the coffee. Brittany stood up and extended her hand to Santana's.
"Let's go get changed." She pulled Santana up and led her toward the house.
"I'll talk to Q when we get back to LA." Santana said as they interlaced their fingers. Brittany nodded and sighed happily.
Quinn's head was killing her when the sun glaring through the skylight finally woke her up. She groaned and rolled over, squeezing her eyes tight. Everything in her body hurt. Somehow, though, she felt content, she felt satisfied, she felt…the events of the night before came crashing back to her and she realized that mostly she felt naked. She opened her eyes and realized quickly that Rachel was also naked. So many thoughts came running through her head that she lost the ability to move. Rachel hot naked, husband, Brittany and Santana outside, nakedness, the time, Rachel's boobs…she couldn't handle all the thoughts scrambling in her brain. She wondered if this is what Brittany felt like most of the time. She reached over for her cell phone. 11:30. That meant that Brittany and Santana were up, they were aware of their little sleepover, and that she needed to get the hell out of bed. She jumped up and frantically ran her brush through her hair.
"Too much noise…" she heard from the bed.
"Get up, Rachel."
"What's wrong with you…"
"Seriously, Rach, get up." Quinn dug threw her suitcase looking for some clothes and wondering where all of her underwear went. Rachel sleepily opened her eyes, and was shocked to see a naked Quinn.
"Quinn! Put on some clothes!" Quinn glared at her.
"Look at yourself!" Rachel looked down to find that she too was naked. She shut her eyes as it all came back…the hot tub, the speech Quinn gave her, the mindblowing sex…she tried to push the last one out of her mind, which was easier said than done with Quinn standing naked in front of her. She grabbed a towel off of the floor and haphazardly threw it over her body, too hungover and tired to realize that one of her breasts' was still hanging out. Quinn turned to her, a glare in her eye.
"Rach! I…I…" all of a sudden Quinn found herself speechless. "You know what, just get back in bed and cover yourself up, I'll get dressed and then you can get dressed."
"That's dumb. It's going to look weird if we come out separately!"
"Well at least do a better job of covering yourself up then!"
"Are you really going to be mad at me about this right now?" Rachel said, pulling the towel up so she was covered. Quinn, however, was still naked, and Rachel was having trouble getting the images of the night before out of her mind.
"Rachel. What we did was very very bad. Do you not understand that?"
"Don't make it seem like this is all on me, Quinn! Of course I understand that! I tried to sleep on the couch. You seduced me into staying in here with you."
"I seduced you?" Quinn said incredulously. "You kissed me first!"
"I didn't hear you complaining, and I only kissed you after you gave me a hard time about why I didn't want to sleep in here."
"I don't even have the first idea of how to have lesbian sex! How could I have seduced you?"
"You seemed to catch on pretty fast," Rachel said sarcastically. Quinn quickly turned fire engine red. She turned to face Rachel, not caring that she was completely naked, and not caring that Brittany and Santana could probably hear them fighting.
"It doesn't matter who started it. What matters is that it should not have happened." She took a step closer to Rachel. "What matters is that I'm upset right now, and you should be too," her voice began to falter as she remembered just how good last night was. "What matters is…" she trailed off, looking at Rachel's pouty lips and the anger in her eyes. Rachel caught the direction of Quinn's gaze and they made quick eye contact. "FUCK." Quinn said. "Where is all my underwear?" She finally found a pair and quickly slipped them on. She gave up on a bra and slipped on some cutoffs and a tank top. "Why are you just standing there?" Quinn said angrily. "Get dressed." Rachel slipped into a dress and then found a pair of underwear that she pulled on underneath it.
"You know we're going to have to talk about this eventually." Rachel said.
"Right now, all I need from you is to put on your best Rachel Berry happy face and get out of this room with me. And here, fix you hair…" Quinn began finger brushing Rachel's tangled hair, but immediately felt her heart race as its smell invaded her senses. "Let's just go," she said, defeated.
Brittany and Santana were just coming into the house as Rachel and Quinn entered the kitchen.
"Good morning, sunshines!" Rachel said cheerily as Brittany and Santana walked toward the kitchen. "How did you sleep?"
"Fine," Santana gave her best "what the fuck is wrong with you" glare to Rachel. "You're awfully chipper for the amount you drank last night, Berry."
"I find that harboring a positive attitude is key to squashing even the worst of hangovers. That and hydration, electrolytes and fiber."
"I find that coffee and cigarettes are the cure…" Brittany rolled her eyes, "but since I don't smoke anymore, I've stuck to coffee and sex…there's plenty of coffee left, it's not all on my shirt. I don't know how to help you in the sex department though…" Santana winked and Brittany stepped on her foot.
"So, I was thinking that we just take it easy today?" Quinn said, taking her first glorious sip of coffee and passing a cup to Rachel. "Just hang around here, maybe go sailing, or a swim in the lake, you know, appreciate the natural beauty of Big Bear and all that shit."
"That sounds great," Brittany said.
"I can't imagine a more perfect way to spend a beautiful Sunday afternoon," Rachel said.
Everyone looked at Santana. It was official, she had gone into full on sleuth mode. Rachel was too upbeat, Quinn was tense and cursed unnecessarily, Quinn knew how Rachel took her coffee without asking. Also…Quinn was not wearing a bra?
"San?" Brittany finally said. "Does that sound okay to you?"
"Oh, yeah, that sounds fine."
They laid out four lawn chairs in the grass, trying to get some of the early afternoon sun. Brittany and Santana shared the headphones from Brittany's iPod and Santana read Parenting magazine. Rachel was engrossed in Variety and Quinn was struggling to focus on her copy of the New Yorker and not think about the night before.
"You should really read this short story," Quinn said, looking over at Santana. "I bet it could be adapted." Quinn handed Santana The New Yorker.
"You should probably check this one out, too," Santana said, handing Parenting over to Quinn. "In fact, I dog eared the article for you, it's called 'Aggression Management 101'…they have a whole section on handling a six to eight year olds aggression." Quinn rolled her eyes.
"Fine, but do you want to try out the lake first?"
"Sure," Santana said.
"You doing anything for Britt's birthday?" Quinn asked as they swam around the lake absentmindedly.
"The usual. You know how she is about her birthday. Big party, the whole shebang." Quinn nodded. "Mike is going to be in town that weekend, which is nice for Britt."
"What are you going to get her?" Santana smirked at Quinn's question.
"Actually, I've been meaning to talk to you about that." Quinn raised her eyebrows. "Are you free on Wednesday?" Quinn nodded. "How do you feel about coming with me to the animal shelter?"
"You can't be serious."
"As a heart attack."
"I can't believe what I'm hearing."
"Look, Q, Brittany has really wanted a dog since we first moved in together, when we were like 20," Santana said.
"I know, I was there," Quinn pointed out.
"And she really wants to have a baby right now, which I think is insane, so I thought it would really cheer her up if I got her a dog. Plus, I read that if you're going to get a puppy, it's better to get it while your kids are still babies because then they're babies together and you don't really get any aggression. LA North Central shelter has a Pitbull-German Shepherd mix that is 4 months old named Lola, and she's super cute, but also would look super fierce when she's grown, and I want to get her, but I want you to make sure it's okay, alright?" Santana said, shrugging her shoulders.
"You're ridiculous." Quinn said.
"I know. So I was thinking, Wednesday, I'd fake go to work, have my assistant forward all my calls to my cell, and meet up with you. We can go out to lunch, check out the dog, and I can start filling out the paperwork. Then we can hang for the rest of the day?"
"Yeah," Quinn said, taken slightly aback. "We haven't had a day together in forever."
"I know. It's not right. The animal shelter is over in Cypress Park and I know some great stuff out there, so I figured we could chill in a different part of town for once."
"Ain't no Beverly Hills."
"That's for sure."
"You are so damn whipped," Quinn splashed Santana. Santana rolled her eyes. Santana splashed her back.
"At least I'm not having weird sleepovers with my 'best friend'," Santana used air quotes, "when my husband stands me up on a national holiday." Quinn splashed Santana again.
"Ugh," Quinn said, "just because you're a lesbian doesn't mean everyone is."
"Well maybe I wouldn't think so if you didn't act like one all the time." Santana replied, splashing Quinn again. Quinn lunged at Santana trying to push her under the water. Santana struggled up, spitting water out of her mouth and nose. "Oh, it's on, bitch," she said, shoveling heaves of water with her arms in Quinn's direction.
"So, how are things going with Sarah?" Brittany asked Rachel, while Quinn and Santana engaged in a massive splashing fight in the lake.
"They're good," Rachel said, looking up from her magazine. "How are things with you and Santana."
"You're lying." Brittany said, simply.
"What? I mean they're fine, nothing to write home about, I guess. Why do you think I'm lying?"
"Because you asked me how things are going with me and San." Brittany said. "There is no reason to ask me that. You know how things are with me and San. You only ever ask when things are bad with you and you are trying to change the subject."
"You're reading too much into things, Britt."
"I don't think anyone has ever said that to me before." Brittany said. Rachel smiled.
"Look, Britt, they're fine, I'm not going to start squealing from a rooftop about the love of my life, but she's nice, pretty, and interesting and we enjoy one another's company at the moment. That's all I ask for right now. Nice, sane, and normal. Drama free." Brittany shrugged and put her headphones back in.
"You two looked like you were having fun…" Brittany said, as Quinn and Santana walked up the lawn from the lake. Santana rolled her eyes.
"That bitch tried to drown me for no good reason," Santana said, glaring at Quinn. The glare quickly turned into a devilish smirk. "And now I'm tired, B…" she said. Without warning she stretched the entire length of her wet body on top of the length of Brittany's dry one. Brittany squealed.
"I hate you! I hate you! Get off of me!"
"But you're so warm and dry, Britt…you're like a giant towel." Brittany giggled and playfully hit Santana as she nuzzled herself further into Brittany's neck.
"I just want to sleep on my big, warm towel," Santana said.
"If you want to take a nap, we should go inside so that you can do it properly." Brittany said. Santana smirked and pulled Brittany up off the chair with her.
"We're gonna take a nap, guys!" Santana said, giddily dragging Brittany toward the house.
"You're getting me all wet, San!" Brittany said in the distance as they approached the door.
"You think you're wet now…you wait," Santana could be heard saying as the sliding door slammed shut. Rachel and Quinn rolled their eyes.
Rachel and Quinn silently read their magazines, enjoying the late summer heat. Quinn rolled onto her back and the sun caught the remaining droplets of water from her swim. Rachel tried not to stare.
"You know, we have to talk about this eventually," she finally said.
"There's nothing to talk about." Quinn said, not looking up from her magazine. Rachel didn't say anything. She knew she couldn't push Quinn into talking about it if she didn't want to. She had changed enough since high school to know that everything wasn't solved by her forcing conversation. Quinn sat up and looked straight ahead, clearly avoiding Rachel. Finally, Rachel felt she had to break the silence.
"You were so upset this morning, and now you have nothing to say?"
"I've had time to think since this morning." They sat in silence for another few moments. "I mean, we both know the only places this conversation is going to go, Rach," Quinn sighed out. "We'll both agree that it never should have happened. We'll say we were confused, it was all the alcohol, it was just some fucked up way of expressing our confused emotions about each other. We'll say it didn't matter, that it didn't mean anything, and thus allow ourselves to continue to be around each other, until our awkwardness reaches another breaking point and we are a little too drunk and we do it again. Well, I'm not going to do that, Rachel."
"Well what exactly do you propose we do then?"
"Nothing. I propose we do nothing."
"Fine." They returned to their magazines. "Just because we don't talk about it doesn't mean it goes away," Rachel finally said, unable to bite her tongue any longer. "We still had sex. You still cheated on your husband." Quinn winced. "You still had sex with me, a woman, and eventually we will have to deal with the consequences."
"Why do there have to be consequences?" Quinn asked.
"Because this is life. There are consequences to our actions."
"Well, I'm tired of doing everything right. I'm tired of always living in fear of what's going to happen. Why can't we just not talk about it and live our lives and see what happens?"
"Because we're not teenagers anymore?" Rachel replied, somewhat shocked by Quinn's nonchalant response. "Because what we did last night was not right?"
"We both are alone, Rachel." Rachel looked at her lap. "And you know what? We both have done what is right. I've never cheated on my husband. I stay at home, the perfect little housewife, while he is off galavanting around the country sleeping with god knows how many women. I never say anything. Well I'm not going to do that anymore. I've lost the last ten years of my life. Obviously, I have three beautiful children that I would die for, but they are all I have. I don't want to waste anymore time second guessing myself, questioning everything, and making myself miserable."
"So where does that leave us?" Rachel asked.
"Rolling with the punches."
"I can't do that, Quinn," Rachel said standing up and turning to leave. Quinn grabbed her wrist and pulled Rachel sharply down to her. She gave Rachel a soft, yet passionate kiss. She pulled away and looked into her dark eyes.
"What do you have to lose?"