I never realized how loud silence could be until Isabella was out of the house. The sounds that made our house a home were gone. No music playing from behind her bedroom door, no giggles and whispers with her girlfriends, no melodic ringtones or pings from text messages at all hours. I could actually hear the hum of the refrigerator when I lay in bed at night.
Monday through Friday I'd check the clock at 3:30, expecting her to burst through the front door after school, tossing her backpack and jacket in a heap on the floor. Saturday afternoons I'd wait for her to pop by the coffee shop with Jake, but even he stopped coming around. I even missed the knife, still coated in peanut butter, resting on the side of the sink after she'd made herself a sandwich.
On the few occasions Isabella came home, her time was divided between Jake and me, each of us vying for her attention. I tried to be respectful of their relationship but it hurt when she'd choose him over me. And then, always too soon, we were saying another tearful goodbye at the airport.
Without her I felt incomplete. We'd been a team for so many years...suddenly I was on my own and didn't know what the hell I was doing. The process of becoming myself again was a far more difficult and daunting process that I thought.
I threw myself into my work, often staying at the cafe from opening at 5:00 am to closing at 9:00 pm simply to avoid spending time in my empty apartment. Edward Cullen business owner replaced my preferred alter ego of Dad.
Emmett and Rosalie invited me out often, but going to their house only delayed the inevitable quiet of my own. The silent greeting when I got home was a sad reminder.
My daughter frequently suggested I start dating again, saying she didn't like me being alone. I always reminded her the only girl for me was a pretty one named Isabella. When she rolled her eyes I told her I was thinking of getting a cat for companionship, in hopes that would appease her. I'd have to get hundreds of cats to replace my girl.
Somehow, we made it through our first year. We had an epic summer vacation. I took her to Hawaii for two weeks, though with the amount of time she spent Facetiming Jake I felt like he was there with us. Back in Washington, we went on hikes, spent long, lazy days at the beach, and visited my parents back home in Forks. But when September came it brought with it the depressive loneliness again, and left the memories of our summer together imprinted on my heart.
Her sophomore year was marginally easier as I knew what to expect, but each farewell was still difficult. I continued working crazy hours to fill the void Isabella had left. She came home for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years, and I relished our time together. Isabella's next trip home was Spring Break and though only months away, it felt like a lifetime. Those short January days shifted to long, lonely evenings. But I muddled through my day-to-day routine as best I could.
And then something a little crazy happened….
The flower shop next door to our cafe closed when old Ms. Tanner retired. The prime retail space was promptly scooped up. Thick curtains soon obscured the view of the interior, and a handwritten sign proudly proclaiming "Coming Soon! Second Story Bookstore" was propped in the window. Emmett and I were thrilled - a bookstore next to our cafe was perfect, although the month of banging and hammering from the renovations wasn't much fun.
And then she started coming in to the coffee shop - the new owner of the bookstore - early each morning, ordering a soy latte to go. I'm not exactly sure what it was about her. Maybe it was her smile, the left side of her mouth turning up more than the right. Perhaps it was how she'd add four packages of sugar to her latte, looking over her shoulder to see if anyone noticed. Whatever it was, I found her intriguing. And she became something for me to look forward to each day. I was smiling again.
And each afternoon, she would return - her long, chestnut-colored hair a little more disheveled than before. She'd order an Earl Grey tea and a scone; settling in at a table by the window, where she would read her book for an hour or more before shrugging back into her jacket and heading out.
I watched her. A lot.
As stupid as it sounds, I fell a little bit in love with her with in those rather ordinary moments. The way she stared out the window deep in thought, as though she were digesting words more than the food. Or how she'd kick off a shoe and tuck her foot under her thigh, the other leg swinging slightly as she read. I'd watch her twist a silver ring around her finger, not her wedding finger, I might add. That one was conveniently naked.
I'd tried to be stealthy, but she caught me staring at her several times. I tried to think of something to say to her, which normally would have been easy for me since my job routinely consisted of making small talk with strangers. I could ask when the bookstore was opening or what she thought of the football game the night before. All I really wanted, though, was to know if she might be interested in having dinner with me. For two weeks straight I couldn't even work up the courage to ask her name.
At one point, I caught her staring at me before she immediately averted her eyes. She pulled a book out of her bag and started reading but I noticed in the hour she was there, she never once turned a page.
"Would you just go talk to her already?" Emmett jabbed his elbow into my side and I shook my head at the distraction.
"What? Who?" I tried to act nonchalant.
"You know who. Book Girl. You're making goo-goo puppy dog eyes at her. Clearly, you're madly in love."
I scoffed. "Emmett, you know there's only one girl for me—"
"Her name's Isabella," we said in unison.
Emmett rolled his eyes. "Give me a break with that. Go ask if she needs more hot water for her tea. Say 'hi' and go from there."
"I don't know…."
In the moment I hesitated, Emmett brushed past me, calling me a pussy under his breath. I watched as he sauntered over to her table. I busied myself with...well, nothing really, as I watched him introduce himself, hand outstretched. There was a loud guffaw and Emmett waved me over.
I wiped my hands on my jeans, came around the counter and walked over to him. To her.
"I'd like you to meet our new neighbor."
Why the hell was he smirking like an idiot?
"Edward, this is Isabella."
I choked on my own saliva. Instead of giving me a whack on the back, Emmett's grin widened.
"Are you okay? Is he okay?" Beautiful brown eyes, wide with concern, ping-ponged back and forth between Emmett and me.
I nodded as I choked out words.
"Sorry, yes, I'm fine. Isabella, is it?" I extended my hand.
"Bella. Just Bella."
"To-may-to, to-mah-to," Smart ass Emmett commented as he shoved me into a chair. "I'll let you kids get acquainted."
After he abandoned me, Bella again asked if I was alright.
"Oh yeah, yeah. I'm fine."
"Good." She paused to take a sip of tea. She looked at me over the rim of her mug. "So, are you going to tell me why my name is so funny to your friend, and why you almost coughed out a lung?" She smirked as she asked.
"My, uh...daughter is named Isabella."
"Aww, how old is she?"
I chuckled because I knew she was assuming I had a little one. I watched her face as I told her, "She's nineteen."
Her eyes widened and I couldn't help but to laugh. "I had her when I was 14, you know. Naw, I'm kidding. I was pretty young but not that young."
With blushed cheeks, I explained exactly why Emmett had gotten such a kick out of her name.
"I've kind of been out of the dating scene...for a while. My friends and daughter pester me about it, so I tell them there's only one girl for me - a pretty one named Isabella. Get it - my daughter is Isabella and well, your name is Isabella and you're obviously beautiful, and oh my God! I can't believe I just told you that." I rubbed my crimson face with my hands.
Thankfully, Bella didn't run screaming while simultaneously calling the police for a restraining order. In fact, she stayed and talked with me long after her tea had turned cold and my staff was impatiently waiting to close up for the night. Everyone except Emmett. He stood behind the counter, arms folded across his chest with a big, goofy grin on his face. No doubt he'd already called Rosalie. I half expected her to walk in the door. Before that happened I offered to walk Bella to her car. There, we continued our conversation for another 45 minutes despite the dipping January temperatures. I didn't even feel the cold.
Bella Swan, 26 and recently single, had moved here from Chelan, a small town three hours east of Edmonds. A librarian in her hometown, she was excited to be opening up her new and used bookstore in a few weeks. I think I remember everything she told me that day. Her favorite book was The Catcher in the Rye, she hated pineapple, and loved to cook. I told her about raising Isabella alone, and opened up about how lonely I was with her away at school. At that point she reached out and gave my arm a squeeze. My heart raced at the physical connection.
I didn't kiss her that night, as much as I wanted to but couldn't trust myself to stop after just one. The next two days were the same. We'd sit at the corner table by the window, Bella with Earl Grey, me with a dark roast, and Emmett behind the counter with a huge grin on his face. We'd talk about anything and everything, for hours, without any lulls. But when I would walk her to her car there would be an awkward pause before we'd part.
"I guess I should get going," I said, fingers drumming on my pant leg.
"Can I ask you something first?"
"What's that?"
"Are you ever going to kiss me?"
She smiled and before I could formulate a reply, Bella rose up onto her tiptoes and pressed her lips to mine. And thank God, my tongue knew what to do after that. We leaned against the car, her body flush against mine and made out, high school style, for half an hour. My stomach was all flip floppy and my hands went clammy and it was the best feeling in the world.
There was temporary madness in the days following. The butterflies in my stomach didn't settle down. I'd see her name on my caller ID and my cheeks would hurt from smiling so much. When we were together, I needed to have a physical connection with her - my hand on her thigh, her fingers laced with mine, or my knee touching hers. When we were apart, she was always on my mind. Maybe it was her laugh, her eyes, or the scent of her skin, but whatever it was made me fall, really fucking hard.
Despite this, we weren't immediately intimate. Part of me was guarding my heart because the connection I felt was so intense it scared me. I was in uncharted territory. It felt so amazing, but I was afraid it - she - wasn't real.
Three weeks later, Bella invited me to her place for dinner. She answered the door dressed in a black skirt that hugged her curves and a shirt that didn't show nearly enough cleavage. It drove me insane. I took off my shoes, left my coat draped over a chair, and followed her into the kitchen. She went to the stove, stirring something...I have no idea what because I was checking out her ass. I couldn't help myself. Bella turned, talking to me over her shoulder. She looked as delicious as dinner smelled.
I sidled up to her, wrapping my arms around her waist, my lips pressing kisses to the side of her neck. Bella turned off the stove and moved the pot off the hot element as she turned to face me.
My hand slipped under her skirt, skimming over her smooth skin. I squeezed her ass and leaned in for more kisses. When we finally came up for air, Bella looked at me with hooded eyes and a wicked smile. We undressed simultaneously - me with shaking hands and her with a air of confidence about her. Dinner was forgotten until closer to midnight, but we still made good use of the kitchen table.
The sex...holy hell. It was mind-blowing. We started out fast and frenzied. Her hands fisted my hair, my lips desperate to kiss every inch of her of bare skin. My tongue lapped greedily as her fingernails bore into my shoulders. And when I entered her, she thrust her hips forward so we slammed together. My God. I was in heaven.
Our first time together, though amazing, would be classified as fucking. A purely physical encounter, a means to release weeks of pent-up frustrations in a rough, primal, sweaty way. It was fucking - and fucking fantastic!
But later that night Bella and I slowed things down. Our fingers interlaced, legs intertwined, eyes steadfast on each other. I watched as she lost herself in her orgasm, my name whimpered in passion, and it was the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen.
Bella and I became inseparable. We became that couple. The one sitting on the same side of the table, holding hands and exchanging lustful glances. We'd steal kisses (and more) in the back office. I couldn't commit to going out with Emmett and Rosalie until I'd checked with Bella. My friends, by the way, loved Bella and Isabella was just happy I wasn't alone so much.
When Bella stayed over, which was often, we would linger over our breakfast. Sitting side-by-side at my kitchen table, her clad one of my shirts, reading the entertainment section of the paper while I tried to coax her back to the bedroom by planting kisses down the side of her neck.
And on one of those mornings, I could envision the scenario being not only a daily thing, but a forever thing. It was then I blurted out I loved her. Bella, her hair adorably disheveled from our morning romp, last night's makeup still smudged under her eyes, started laughing.
"I look like shit and you're telling me you love me."
I shook my head. I didn't see any of that. All I could see was the beauty you don't see with your eyes, but with your heart. And finally, finally, I understood that look on Emmett's face when Rosalie would give him a hug after a day at work. The same look I'd seen my parents exchange many times. It's like everything you'd ever lost returned to you, all at once.
"You look stunning. And it's true. I love you."
Bella turned to sit on my lap. Her hands ran through my hair; her lips, still tasting of orange juice, kissed me. Brown eyes met green as she repeated those three words back to me.
That's when I knew I would marry her.
Alanna did so much magic with this chapter - thank you, sweetie. You're a doll. xo
I've had so many of you waiting patiently for Edward to meet his Bella. Lots of reviews and PM's either guessing or hoping this would happen. It killed me not to spoil the surprise for you. I hope it was worth the wait.
This is the last update before Christmas/Hanukkah/Holidays/etc. I wish you all the best the season has to offer. My love and prayers going out to those who are having a first without a loved one or with someone who is gravely ill. Special love to Stacey and Jan. xoxo
Thank you again for your support of this unconventional love story.