Roxie strode into the penthouse and plopped down on the sofa, throwing her purse next to her and rubbing her temples. She just couldn't catch a break, could she?

"Agnes," she asked the girl who was looking out the window. "What are you looking at?"

Agnes turned. "Vince," she said. "He's out on a deck chair and he's not wearing a shirt." She grinned.

Roxie got up and strode over to the window, pushing Agnes to the floor and gazing at Vince openly. "Get me a drink!" She said when she could finally tear her eyes away from Vince's bare chest and look at Agnes who was wincing as she struggled to get off the floor. "Ice tea, two spoonfuls of sugar and squirt of raspberry syrup. I'll give you ten seconds."

Agnes' eyes widened and she ran to the kitchen. Once she was gone, Roxie grinned and headed out onto the deck, taking the empty chair next to Vince. "Enjoying yourself?" She asked.

He grinned and reached over to take her hand. "I am now," he said. "How was your day?"

Roxie scoffed. "Not well. Sucky as usual. I think Dad hates me again."

"Why?" Vince asked. "The two of you have been getting along so well lately, ever since you told him about running for student council president."

"I know, right?" Roxie said. "But when I came to his house so he, Uncle Stefan and I could hold this week's campaign planning meeting, there was another girl sitting at the kitchen table. In my spot!"

"Well, did you tell her to move?" Vince asked. "Did you do it politely?"

Roxie nodded vigorously. "Yes," she said. "But Daddy told me that Mary Anne was a guest in his house and as such could sit wherever she darn well pleased. And that our campaign planning meeting was canceled in honor of Mary Anne's visit. I don't know what makes her so damn special!"

"Did you even think of asking your father what was going on with Mary Anne?" Vince asked. "Maybe she's just a family friend and she's visiting, and she'll be gone in a couple of days. If that's the case, you really can't blame your father for wanting to spend time with her."

"But why did she have to come now?" Roxie complained. "This is when campaigning is the most important! We can't drop the ball now! And apparently since I'm not allowed to kill my opponents, which would just simplify everything, what am I supposed to do? I can't do all of it by myself!"

"I'll help you," Vince said. "On the condition that you put your absolute trust in me. You're not allowed to tell me that what I'm doing is wrong and you can't complain about it either."

Roxie sat up. "You've been thinking about this for awhile now, haven't you?"

Vince nodded. "As a matter of fact, I have. I even have your next move all planned out."

"And what is it?" Roxie asked. "A stakeout with cameras where we capture my opponents doing bad things and then plaster the footage all over the internet?"

Vince shook his head. "That's not what I had in mind. One of the things that Ashley Speckler has going for her is that she's very service-oriented. She reaches out to the community and volunteers. People like that. Compared to her, you look really selfish."

Roxie scoffed. "Well, that's a tad judgmental, don't you think?"

"Well, I'm just telling you what it looks like from where I sit," Vince said. "I don't believe any of it myself. You can be a very giving person when you wanna be...sometimes."

"So what do you plan to do to make me look better, maestro? Do you have a plan?" Roxie asked.

Vince nodded. "Remember that article you did for the paper after you saved the kid from his peanut allergy?"

"Yeah," Roxie nodded. "What about it?"

"Well, that was genius PR," Vince said. "I was thinking it wouldn't hurt to have you do the same sort of thing again, only this time at a nursing home. I could bring my camera and take pictures of you playing checkers with the residents, listening to stories about 'the good old days'. You know, stuff like that. People like people who are nice to the elderly."

"Oh, come on!" Roxie complained. "Is that the best you can do? Old people? If I wanted to be bored by stories about the olden days, all I'd have to do is get my mother to start talking about her childhood. Or worse: my dad."

Vince smirked. "Oh, come on. It won't be so bad."

Before Roxie could reply, Agnes came bustling out with Roxie's iced tea. "Here you go," she said. She was breathing hard and the hand that held the tea was shaking "Iced tea, two spoonfuls of sugar and a squirt of raspberry syrup."

Roxie took the glass from her. "Took you long enough," she said.

Vince leaned forward. "She means 'thank you', Agnes. Go take a break. You deserve it."

"She can do that," Roxie said. "After she cleans up the mess in the kitchen. I know there is one."

Agnes shifted a little. "I spilled the first glass of tea and had to make another one. I'll go clean it up." Turning on her heel, she went back into the house and shut the screen door behind her.

"You could be a bit more gracious, you know," Vince said to Roxie. "Like maybe tell Agnes 'thank you' every once in awhile."

"Why should I do that?" Roxie asked after taking a long sip from her glass. "Getting me stuff is her job after all. Now, you were saying something about how working with old people won't be so bad?"

"Well, it won't," Vince said. "You'll probably love it. And remember, I said if you wanted me to help you, you couldn't complain?"

Roxie ran her fingers lightly over his chest. "Oh, I suppose," she said. "But just for future reference, next time you need to tell me something like this, do it when we're both naked. I'll be more receptive that way."

"All right," Roxie said the next morning, looking at the Twiight Woods rest home with narrow, suspicious eyes. "Let's get this over with, all right? Charlie and I are going out dancing tonight and I don't want to walk into a club smelling like old people."

Vince grabbed Roxie's arm and led her inside. "This whole place is just...hopeless, isn't it?" She asked as a group watching reruns of Jeopardy caught her eye. "I bet they don't even know where they are."

"Don't stare," Vince said through his teeth. "It's not polite." He then turned away from her and back to the desk. "Jeff!" He said to a man at the front desk. "How are you?"

Jeff sighed, running his fingers over his buzz-cut dark hair. "Much better than usual, actually. Everybody's eager to meet Roxie. It's not every day they meet someone new." He looked at Roxie, who wouldn't meet his eyes, then back at Vince. "Is this her?" He asked.

Vince nodded. "It is," he said and shoved Roxie toward the desk. "I'll leave her here while I go get my camera so you can do what you will with her and we'll be out of here around four. Is that all right?"

Jeff nodded. "Oh, yes. See you back here in a few minutes."

After Vince left, Roxie and Jeff looked at each other in awkward silence. "So," she said at last. "You take care of old people for a job? Couldn't you think of anything better to do?"

Jeff just shook his head. "Vince was right about you," he said. "You really are a piece of work. I think I'll have you chat with Alfred today."

"Who's Alfred?" Roxie asked. "Is he nuts?"

"He has dementia, but is otherwise very pleasant company, so if he starts to veer off tangent and talk about strange things, that's why," Tony explained. He led her to a door and then knocked, opening the door and leading Roxie inside. Alfred looked at Jeff with suspicion as he entered, but when the old man saw Roxie, his eyes lit up and he began moaning.

"What's the matter with him?" Roxie asked, clutching at Jeff's arm. "Should I be worried? Are you going to sedate him or something?"

"No!" Jeff said, looking between Alfred and Roxie in amazement. "That's more of a reaction than we've had out of him in days! I knew bringing you in here was a good idea!" He gave Roxie a wink. "Have fun," he said and left the room. "And don't worry. I'll tell Vince where you are."

Once he was gone, however, Alfred blinked and gestured for Roxie to come closer. Roxie stood frozen for a moment then slowly edged toward him. "What do you want?" She asked when she finally reached the bed.

"You have to listen to me," Alfred said. "Now that he's gone, we can talk. I didn't want to say anything while he was in here, but you, I have a feeling I can tell you. Can I? Can I trust you?"

"Trust me with what?" Roxie asked.

"Never mind," Alfred said. "I'll tell you later. First though, I have to show you something. Could you open the drawer in my bedside table? I would, but I have arthritis, you know."

"Fine," Roxie said. She opened the drawer and gasped at the picture that met her eyes. She slowly pulled it out. "Where did you get this?" She asked.

"Do you know who it is?" Alfred asked her.

Roxie looked down at the picture of a blonde Selina. "Yeah. It's my moth-I mean, it's my grandmother. My very distant, several greats grandmother."

He grinned. "That's a lie, isn't it?"

"Of course it's not a lie!" Roxie said. "Look at the picture, old man! Can you see how much we look alike? Or are you blind as well?"

Alfred chuckled. "You can't fool me," he said. "You're just like her, you know."

"No, I'm not!" Roxie said. "Don't say that! Don't ever say that!"

Alfred sat up. "I don't see why not. She was a pretty tomato, your mother was. Almost too pretty. When I found out why, I was surprised, although I shouldn't have been."

"What do you mean 'when you found out why'?" Roxie asked. "You know what she is?"

He nodded. "Of course I know. I'm one too!"

Roxie's brow furrowed. "You mean you're a...vampire? But you're so old!"

"You don't have to tell me twice, sweetheart," he said. "I may be old now, but I didn't always look like this. I was quite the Beau Brummel in my day. Handsome as hell and I'm sure having a rather sizeable trust fund didn't hurt either."

"Yeah, yeah, you were good-looking and rich. So what?" Roxie asked. "Get to the point! Where does my mother come into all this?"

"I met her once," Alfred said. "Over a hundered years ago. It was in the late twenties, '28, I think. I had just celebrated my sixty-eighth birthday and was coming out of my club, a men's club that is, when I spotted the most beautiful woman walking down the street. She was alone, so I offered to walk her home."

"And that woman was my mother?" Roxie asked, feeling disgusted. "You're a complete sicko! My mom was then and is now a babe and you're so old! What were you thinking?"

Just then, there was a knock on the door and Alfred lapsed back into his comalike state. "Come in," Roxie said. Vince came in the room. "How are you both getting along in here?"

"Oh, just peachy," Roxie said, deftly moving Alfred's picture of her mother out of the way so Vince couldn't see it. "What did you want?"

"I just came in here for a picture," Vince said, holding up his camera. "Because you know that people won't believe you helped out someone in the community unless they have some sort of photographic evidence."

"Oh, fine," Roxie said, going beside Alfred's bedside and posing. "Take your picture quick and go away. Alfred was telling me the most interesting story about aliens before you showed up."

"You know he has dementia, right?" Vince asked after he shot the picture. "Jeff says he drinks blood and talks about stuff that happened a long time ago."

"So does my dad and no one's put him in a home," Roxie said. "Maybe Alfred isn't as screwed up as Jeff thinks. Maybe he's a vampire!"

Vince smirked. "Did he tell you that? I wouldn't think you'd be so gullible."

"Well, who cares?" Roxie snapped. "We're getting along nicely and you need to go away, because he won't continue his fun story unless I'm the only one who's here."

"Well, fine," Vince said, getting up. "Glad to see you're enjoying yourself." He eyed her strangely and left the room.

"Who was that?" Alfred asked.

"Oh, he's my boyfriend," Roxie said. "Now, back to your story about my mother?"

"What sort of a name did she give a peach like you?" Alfred asked her.

"Roxanne," Roxie said.

"Oh," he nodded. "Just like the whore in that Sting song."

"Oh, I'm sure that's not where my name came from," Roxie said. "Now please just continue your story about my mother."

"I walked her home and told her goodbye, then I went to my house and I couldn't help but wonder where I'd seen her before. She seemed familair," Alfred continued. "I looked and looked and finally, in one of my mother's albums, I found a picture of her."

"You found a picture of my mom in one of your mom's photo albums? Who was your mother?" Roxie asked.

"I doubt you've paid much attention to anything your mother's told you about her life, so my mother's name won't mean anything to you, but I'll tell you anyway," Alfred said. "Her name was Louisa Forbes and she and your mother were rivals, you might say. They both had their eye on the same man, but your mother won out in the end. Or so she thought."

"Forbes?" Roxie said. "Where do I know that name? I know it! I do!"

"Louisa had brothers, and their descendants are still around, doubtlessly," Alfred said. "That's probably where you heard the name from. Now, back to my story. I found a picture of her along with a news clipping about somebody called The Lady in Red dated from when I was four years old in early 1865. She'd lived in my mother's hometown of Mystic Falls,had gotten engaged to a soldier, and then run off with the town doctor after the soldier had gone off to war. But there was a rumor going around town several years later when I was in my early twenties that the lady in red had been turned into a vampire by the doctor, who was also a vampire himself. Nobody really wanted to believe that, though. He was too good a man for them to think of him as evil."

"So what did you do?" Roxie asked. "About my mom, I mean? Did you confront her?"

"Are you stupid?" Alfred asked. "For as long as I can remember, my parents always told me to be careful of vampires. Do you honestly believe that the first time I saw one, I would just confront it without a plan?"

"Well, whatever plan you came up with obviously didn't work, did it?" Roxie said. "Because here you are."

"She tricked me," Alfred said. "She led me to a cemetery one evening and every grave we went to was that of a girl whose heart I'd broken in my youth. Most of them committed suicide, you know. When we were on the tenth girl, she waited until I was facing the stone and then pinned my cape to the ground with a knife. As I struggled, she turned my head and I saw blood dripping down her palm. She forced it down my throat and then picked up the knife and I ran like hell. But she gave chase, planted the knife right in my middle, and next thing you know, I was a vampire. Seventy years old and a vampire. Forced to look at my wrinkles and spots every day for the rest of eternity."

"Wow," Roxie said. "A fitting end for someone who had always thought of himself as God's gift. Mom does kind of have disdain for guys like that, although my dad and her first fiance, the soldier in story, were exactly the type. Kind of a circular thing, I guess." She shrugged.

"So your parents aren't together now?" Alfred asked.

Roxie shook her head. "No. Mom just married my uncle and now they're honeymooning in Europe."

"And I take it that makes you unhappy?" Alfred asked again.

Roxie nodded. "Yeah, I guess it does. I moved out of their house a long time ago and now I live in an apartment by myself. Granted it's a nice apartment, a penthouse in fact, but it's still an apartment."

"You know," Alfred said, "You're not so bad. I have a house that I'm not using because they'll never let me out of here. The keys are in a safe deposit box at the bank down town. I'll give you the necessary information and you can go get your hands on the deed and the keys. It's a nice place. I think you'll like it."

"And what about you?" Roxie asked. "I mean, you're clearly not crazy. Why do you stay here and act like it?"

Alfred sighed. "I'm old. Staying here is just easier than roughing it out on the streets."

"Oh, come on!" Roxie said. "Why don't you give it a shot?"

Alfred sat up. "All right. But you can't tell them that I'm really lucid. That'll spoil everything."

Roxie put her hands on her hips and gave Alfred a look. "How did you get in here, anyway? One of your kids check you in?"

Alfred shook his head. "Nope. Did it myself."

"Then it shouldn't be hard to get out," Roxie said. "Just tell them you're better and out you go."

"They think I'm crazy," Alfred said. "People don't exactly say 'isn't that lovely' if you tell them you're a vampire."

"You could compel them to let you go," Roxie said. "Alfred, do you know anything about your powers at all? If not, Vince and I can help you learn. We're vampires too, fully equipped to teach all the ins and outs of our state of being."

Alfred leaned forward. "When can we start?"

"I can't believe this," Vince said as he and Roxie stood on the front steps of Alfred's house. "You're telling me that you and that poor old guy had a nice chat and he decided to give you his house?" He gave Roxie a look. "You compelled him, didn't you?"

Roxie shook her head. "He gave it to me fair and square." She looked in the windows. "Oh, those chairs look comfy. And that fireplace is beautiful." She turned to Vince and held out her hand. "Give me the keys. I wanna go inside."

Vince shook his head. "No. You don't deserve this house."

"Well, then, where are we going to sleep?" Roxie asked. "In your car? Please tell me not in your car. There's no room to move around in there, if you get my drift."

Vince took her hand and led her around to the yard. "Either my car or the lawn. Take your pick."

"You aren't serious!" Roxie's jaw went slack. "I swear I got his house legit! And come on. It has a bowling alley in the basement! You like bowling don't you?"

Vince shook his head. "I couldn't enjoy it knowing the price it cost."

"Which was nothing!" Roxie said. "How many times do I have to say that?"

"Well, however many, it won't help your case," Vince said.

Roxie put her hands on her hips. "Well, fine! I don't have to put up with this. You enjoy sleeping in the yard. I'm going to spend my night somewhere that has actual beds in it!" She got in her car and drove off before Vince could say another word.

"I'm back!" Damon said as he stood outside Stefan and Anna's front door. "Did Sam behave himself?"

Stefan's lip quirked. "Come see."

Curious, Damon followed Stefan into a room where he saw Lucy standing in front of a mirror crying her eyes out. Her hair, which had once been long, was now almost nonexistent, just little tufts of blonde poking out of her head. She turned and when she saw Damon, she ran at him with her arms out. He picked her up and held her to himself. "What happened to you?" He asked.

"Sam decided to give her a little haircut," Stefan said. "And as you can see, he was very thorough. She hasn't stopped crying since it happened."

"Well, I'll just have to have a talk with Sam, won't I?" Damon said. "Tell him that's not what we do to girls."

"I wouldn't be too hard on him," Stefan grinned again. "Lucy gave as good as she got. Sam ended up with a broken nose, but if Anna and I hadn't broken them apart when we did, it would have been much worse for him."

Damon looked down at Lucy again. Her red face was buried against his shoulder. "You need a break?" He asked Stefan. "Why don't you and Anna go out and do something and I'll take care of these two."

Stefan nodded. "All right. Thanks a lot. I'll go get Sam and we'll put them both in your car. In fact, I think it might be best if someone else comes too. That way, you can keep a grip on Lucy, I'll keep a grip on Sam so no one gets hurt any more, and then the third person can drive." He went to Sam's room and got him and as they were making their way out of the house, Anna came in.

"Hello, Damon," she looked at Sam and Lucy. "Taking the warriors home, I see. Want me to drive? It would be difficult for one person to keep a hold of both of them at the same time."

"That's just what I thought," Stefan said. "Do you mind?"

Anna shook her head. "Of course not."

They drove to Damon's house and after Stefan and Anna left, Damon tried to calm the still hysterical Lucy down.

"Let me show you something pretty," he said to her. He brought her into his bedroom and set her down on the bed, then got down on his knees and rooted around underneath it, bringing up a large wooden box. "Wanna see what's in here?" he asked Lucy. She stopped crying, sniffled and nodded. He opened the box and Lucy's eyes widened. The box was full of diamond jewelry: rings, necklaces, bracelets, and even a tiara.

"All this was your mother's," Damon said. "Her mommy gave it to her, but she doesn't like it. She thinks it's too fancy. You wanna try some of it on?"

Lucy nodded and pretty soon, she had the tiara on her head and three bracelets on each arm. Damon picked her up and carried her to the bathroom. "I'm pitty," she said, smiling dreamily at her reflection.

Damon kissed her forehead. "Yes, you are."

Just then, they heard the doorbell ring and Sam came running in. "Roxie's here!" He said.

"Oh, great," Damon said, following Sam out of the bathroom. "You let her in, didn't you?"

"Yes," Sam nodded.

"Well, what's up?" Damon asked when he saw Roxie sitting on the sofa. "Are you okay?"

"Could I stay here for the night?" Roxie asked. "I got a new house and my boyfriend won't let me have the keys and use it because he says that I got the house under false pretenses even though I didn't."

"How did you get the house?" Damon asked.

"Well, as you know, or if you don't, I'm running for student council president at school and Vince thought that one way to spruce up my image would be to show me in photos doing community service. So he took me down to the old folks' home and the guy I was supposed to bond with turned out to be a vampire! Nobody believed him of course. They just thought he was senile. We chatted, he said he was one of Mom's victims during her bad phase, and that his mom had known her and you back when you both were alive."

"Who was his mom?" Damon asked.

"Louisa Forbes was the name he gave me," Roxie said. "Where have I heard it before?"

"Probably from Louisa's several greats nice Caroline," Damon said. "Just think: if I would have married Louisa, I'd be dead by now. Actually, I would have killed myself on our wedding night. She was insufferable. I much preferred your mother."

" Well, Louisa's son Alfred, who was turned into a vampire by Mom, bonded with me and gave me the house he never uses. What happend to Lucy?" Roxie asked. "I can't help but notice she has next to no hair."

"I did it," Sam said and burst out giggling. This caused Lucy to burst into tears again. "I'm going to take her out and calm her down," Damon said to Roxie. "Would you mind watching Sam?"

"Of course not," Roxie said. Once Damon and Lucy were gone, Roxie took Sam in her lap and hugged him. "Did I ever tell you you're my favorite?" She asked him.

"Well, look who's here?" Roxie said when she opened the front door of Damon's house a few hours later. "I knew you wouldn't be able to stay away. I knew you'd call."

"I just came to apologize," Vince said. "And were you really telling the truth when you said there's a bowling alley in the house?"

"Well, yeah!" Roxie said. "You want to try it out, don't you?"

"Well, I wouldn't say no," Vince said.

"Well, I would love to, but I'm watching my brother so he'd have to come with. Is that okay?" Roxie asked.

"Sure," Vince shrugged. "Why not?"

Roxie nodded. "All right. Sammy! We're going bowling!"

Sam came running out and Roxie picked him up, taking him out to Vince's car after leaving a note for Damon, explaining where she and Sam had gone.

"He really seems to like you," Vince observed as he watched Roxie help Sam with his small bowling ball. "How did that happen?"

"People like me," Roxie said. "I know you might find that hard to believe, but some people do." She turned away from him and helped Sam grip the ball. "All right," she said. "Now we have to push it really hard so that it goes and knocks all those pins down at the end. See them?" Sam nodded. He and Roxie gave the ball a push and it rolled down the lane, knocking over seven of the pins.

"You did it!" Roxie said, hugging him. "Good job!" Sam grinned and jumped up and down. "I did it! I did it!"

After they picked up the spare, Roxie looked at Vince. "You were looking at my butt the whole time, weren't you?" She asked.

"What, me?" Vince asked. "Why would I do that?" But he broke into a grin anyway. "Yes," he said finally. "Yes, I was."

"Well at least you're honest," Roxie said.

After they finished bowling, they watched a movie, and by the time it was over, both Roxie and Sam had fallen asleep on the sofa. Vince threw a blanket over them and kissed Roxie on the forehead. "See?" He whispered. "I knew there was some good in you after all."

Later when Charlie called to ask where she was so they could go clubbing, Vince told her Roxie was busy.