Dinner with the Ogres
Originally written Feb. 20, 1012
AN: So what kind of trouble has Kukihana gotten herself into now? Read on to find out!
Disclaimer: I don't own KND and I don't own Ella Enchanted, If I did, I would not be here!
Words: 3,510
I woke up the following morning to something sharp jabbing me in the ribs.
"Wake up, Breakfast. How would you like to be served for breakfast?" an oily voice asked.
I opened my eyes and yet out a small yelp. Ten ogres were enclosed around me. The biggest one persisted in poking me with a stick, although I was clearly awake.
How do you like to be cooked? Bloody? Medium? Or done to a crisp?" Eight ogres surrounded me. "It will only hurt for a minute." My ogre (the one who woke me) stroked my cheek. "I'm a fast eater." I looked at the others, searching vainly for a sympathetic face.
Not far off, I saw my saddlebags, next to a pile of bones. Whose bones? I hated to think. Then I realized.
I realized with horror that they had eaten Fanny and Patton's pony, Sunny. I turned over and emptied my stomach.
The ogre growled and slapped me across the face, his sharp nails drawing three red lines along my cheek.
He switched to Ogrese to speak to his friends, unaware that I understood every word, thanks to my studies with Language Mistress. "forns uiv eMMong FFnOO ehf nushOOn!" Which translated to 'It will be sour for hours!'
One of the female ogres (I guessed she was female because she had less facial hair) spoke up. "Don't tell me you think you're going to eat it all by yourself, ZaNNdy." The other ogres bared their teeth at the one called ZaNNdy.
"I caught it! And I can't share with everyone; there wouldn't be enough to go around. It is too skinny. Besides, I allowed you all to eat the pony last night."
"That was last night," the female hissed in reply, "Now, it is morning, and I am hungry again! You wouldn't care if the entire tribe went hungry as long as you were allowed to eat the treats."
The two ogres lunged at each other, biting and scraping, and suddenly all ten were involved in the fight, either trying to pull ZaNNdy and the female apart or simply joining in. I began to crawl on my belly closer to the large tree I had been sleeping under. If I could just climb up it, perhaps the ogres wouldn't think to look among its branches for me. It was a wild hope, but my only chance at escape and survival.
"Hey, did we order this food to go?" One ogre asked.
"No." ZaNNdy said, giving the young ogre a weird look. "Why?" He asked
"Because its running away!" The ogres roared, and their scuffle was over as quickly as it had begun.
"Stop," ZaNNdy called in Kyrrian. I wrenched myself forward another foot but then collapsed on the ground. The curse wouldn't let me escape.
ZaNNdy began to cackle. "You see the secret it holds now? See by what I mean when it is obedient, not only to its parents to everyone. No need to persuade it. It would skin itself alive if I told it to!" It was true, if they asked me to boil myself in a pot, I would have to do it.
I lay face down on the ground, gasping for breath as I recovered from the effects of the curse, and pretending I did not understand anything they were saying. They argued for a while and decided they would bring me with them on their travels and wait to have me for breakfast the next day, when I would no longer taste of sick. They all continued to whine about their hunger and hoped to find other people and animals. Side dishes, I supposed. I was allowed to take my saddlebags and my carpetbag. I wondered if I could chance a peek at my magic book; perhaps it could help me in some way.
ZaNNdy wanted to know if there was food in them, and there was great excitement when I said yes. But when they opened the elves' flasks, they spat in disgust. "lah1FFOOn! ruJJ!" ("Vegetables! Fish!") The ogres pronounced the words as though they were poisonous.
ZaNNdy scratched his head. "I wonder how it can eat those things and still taste good," he said.
"Maybe it doesn't taste good. We haven't eaten it yet." The speaker was the ogre who had warned of my escape.
The ogres moved at a pace quite similar to the poor pony's. ZaNNdy made me sit on his shoulders, and I had to grasp at his light, oily hair to keep from falling the considerable distance to the ground. I noticed we were travelling south, away from the giant farms and likely back to the fork in the road that would take us to the ogre lands. It certainly made no difference to me whether I was consumed in 40 feet or 40 miles from my intended destination. I was thankful, at least, that we did not come across other travelers. I would suffer my fate alone the following morning.
The further we went, the more the ogres grumbled about how hungry they were, and perhaps they could eat me tonight after all. They cast jealous stares my way as I dined on the food Patton and Fanny had given me.
"Perhaps you should all try some," I suggested wryly, "you may find that you prefer radishes to ribs and legumes to legs." Several of them snorted with laughter, and what looked to be the youngest of the pack, a small female, addressed ZaNNdy in Ogrese.
"Maybe we should wait and take the time to know our meals better. This one is quite funny."
"Don't try to make a pet out of it," ZaNNdy growled in reply, "Just look at it! So delicate and thin. It will barely be able to feed a few of us, much less survive as a plaything."
I shuddered as the young female sent me a small smile. Without the compulsion, she could not hide the blood crusted under her nails or dried in the corners of her mouth.
As the ogres were settling down for the night, the young ogre approached me. "Do not be afraid."
Suddenly, the actual feeling of fear at the prospect of being devoured by ten ravenous ogres left me, though I remained aware of the danger on a logical level.
"My name is NufIIdAAngAAn I hope you will be calm. I do so hate to see people upset," she patted my arm, as if in sympathy, "but I'm not yet adroit at convincing them to feel better. I am working on it, though."
I did feel slightly calmer, although there was a little too much staccato present in her voice to be entirely persuasive.
"It has been such a long and trying day," she soothed, working to sound smoother, "and you must be so exhausted.
I nodded sluggishly, stifling a yawn.
"You can sleep by the fire near me; I promise I will protect you."
Despite my sleepy state, a tiny flare of hope ignited at the idea that she wasn't going to tie me up, and flickered out at her next words:
"But you mustn't run away."
I started awake some time later. It was still dark, but a full moon and cloudless sky provided enough light to see by. NufIIdAAngAAn was on her side, facing away from me. I could hear the gurgling and wheezing noises ZaNNdy made as he slept soundly, a little farther off. I stood up silently and maneuvered my way through the dozing ogres, careful to avoid bumping into them, although their habit of sleeping on one another made it difficult to negotiate the living, breathing, shifting labyrinth of limbs and torsos. Once I was clear of the heap, I snatched up my rucksack and loped away.
I only made it a few paces before the pain set in. A few more steps and I was on my hands and knees, feeling as though I could vomit again and wincing at the throbbing in my head. I tried to crawl even further away but ended up turning in circles like a pitiful old dog. I ended up scooting closer to the ogres, but only just. I sat as far away as I could without feeling the effects of the curse so that I could think. You must break the spell now, I told myself furiously, there is no other way. There is no prince to give you a different order and save you. If you do not break the curse now, the ogres will soon wake and waste no time tearing you limb from limb.
"You must break it…th-the spell is broken, Kuki. You do not need to obey NufIIdAAngAAn's command. You may walk away whenever you feel like it." I murmured softly to myself, barely audible. I repeated these words and tried to move away but ended up clutching my stomach and blinking to clear my spinning vision.
I started to feel desperate. Perhaps I could persuade myself as the ogres usually did with their prey. I cleared my throat quietly, and tried to imitate NufIIdAAngAAn's smooth way of speaking,
"A spell is nothing. It is only made of silly words. It has no power over you. You can walk away. You need not stay with the ogres," I told myself, elated to find that I could take long, confident strides, and there was no pain or nausea! I had done it! I had broken that fool Henrietta's spell and saved my own life!
Then I looked down and saw ZaNNdy's ugly face right by my feet. I had been walking towards the ogres, not away. I bit down on my lips to suppress a scream of sheer frustration. Hot tears sprang to my eyes at the thought of dying without ever having lived without this wretched curse. I went back to my spot as far away as I could manage and sat, staring desolately at the pile of slumbering ogres.
My voice had been rather persuasive, all lisping and breathy and silken. There stood a chance I could use this skill in another way. I practiced my persuasive voice in Ogrese, trying to make the syllables sound as oily and slippery as I could. At first, my voice was too rough, but I practiced the same phrases over and over, losing track of the time and falling asleep.
I woke to the sound of NufIIdAAngAAn practicing her persuasive powers on me. "It's time to wake up, little one. You were smart to stay with me through the night; who knows what bandit or animal may have attacked you in these dangerous lands."
I had to nod in agreement, picturing stealthy men dressed in black with blood-covered swords and feral creatures snapping their glistening teeth at my vulnerable flesh.
"ZaNNdy," spoke another female, "we should eat it now, and you must share. I'm certain we will find more food later today."
ZaNNdy seemed more agreeable after a night's rest. "Fine, but only if I get a whole leg to myself," the brute said, grabbing me by the shoulders and shoving NufIIdAAngAAn out of the way. The other ogres eagerly claimed the other portions of my body and I was soon divided up rather neatly. NufIIdAAngAAn seemed reluctant at first and said she wanted to keep me a while longer, but relented when she was promised my throat.
"It's the best part," she told me soothingly, and reached to pat my neck.
"I found it, so I get to kill it!" ZaNNdy declared. There was a look in his eyes that said he was looking forward to the killing more than the actual eating.
"You…" my voice came out as a high-pitched yelp, but I tried again, "You're not truly hungry," I rasped out in Ogrese. My voice was not persuasive enough! I imagined swallowing a cup of oil to coat my throat.
The ogres had all stopped when they heard their language fall from my lips and stared in amazement.
"See," NufIIdAAngAAn piped up, "it is funny and smart. Can't we keep it for a pet?"
The other ogres seemed to actually be contemplating the proposal, but then ZaNNdy's belly let out a loud growl.
"Too bad I'm so hungry," he sneered at me, gripping my thigh roughly and lowering his head. His pointed teeth were just inches away, and another ogre had gripped my shoulders.
More oil, more honey, I instructed myself silently. "How can you possibly eat me right now? You are all so full. You've all just had a grand feast of six fat elfin ponies and you can barely stand."
ZaNNdy fell back onto his bottom, his grip on my leg loosening. I felt the hands on my shoulders slip away.
"The ground is so soft," I went on in my honeyed voice, "soft and relaxing. And you are all so tired."
NufIIdAAngAAn yawned and rubbed at her eyes like a little child.
"The sun has only just risen," I soothed, "it would be much nicer to sleep in and eat when there is room in your bellies for more."
NufIIdAAngAAn had curled into a little ball on the ground, and ZaNNdy's head was lolling on his chest. The other ogres were all in similar sleepy states.
"And while you slumber, I will find you another wonderful meal. A meal of gnomes, and cows, and trolls, and piglets…"
"Nothing too mushy," NufIIdAAngAAn murmured, her eyes drooping shut.
I stared around, scarcely believing what I had just done. Sleep had claimed all the ogres once more. They lay in their tangled pile, wheezing and drooling. I stepped away from ZaNNdy and could not stop a soft little giggle of triumph.
For once, I was the one making the orders.
My elation did not last long. I remembered that although I could apparently imitate the persuasive powers of the ogres, Henrietta's curse and NufIIdAAngAAn's command made it so that I could not leave them. I could hardly arrive at Dolostone's wedding with ten ravenous ogres, if I could even manage to control them for such an extended period of time. And as soon as I needed to sleep, the ogres would surely remember their hunger. Ogres were clever creatures and would probably know not to wake me before devouring me next time.
I heard a branch snap bind me and whirled around. I wondered if the elfin food I had eaten had any magical properties, because I saw a vision. It was cruel to tease me so; my vision consisted of seven knights carrying ropes and chains advancing towards me, led by a golden haired young man.
I shook my head slightly in astonishment. Visions could not actually break branches! It was Wally!
His eyes met mine for the briefest moment as he pressed his finger to his lips, indicating that I should remain quiet. Then he shifted his attention back to the cluster of ogres and crept towards them, his men following close behind.
The ogres were sound sleepers, but as soon as the knights began to bind their feet and hands with the ropes and chains, their snorings and wheezings stopped. ZaNNdy jolted awake with a loud roar, which quickly changed into a purring noise at the sight of Wally.
"Your Highness, we are so very honored by your presence. But why would you bind us? We are your friends." ZaNNdy's voice was pure silk.
I had to frown in agreement.
ZaNNdy reached down to untie the ropes Wally had tied securely around his ankles, but Wally shoved his hands away roughly and tightened their hold. I gaped in shock. Never had I known Wally to be so cruel!
The other ogres were trying to stir against their bindings as well. ZaNNdy spoke again, his words slick and soothing, "My Prince, I would give my life to protect you, but I cannot if you tie me up."
Surely, Wally could see the reason in that. I gawked stupidly as Wally and his knights ignored the pleas and arguments of the ogres. Suddenly, ZaNNdy lashed out, swinging a meaty fist at Wally's temple. Wally ducked and rolled out of the way.
It was as though ZaNNdy's action had the rest of the ogre's springing into action. Although the knights were armed with swords and daggers, the ogres had an advantage in size, strength, and even number. The two sides were now fully engaged in battle. NufIIdAAngAAn and another ogre had a tall knight with auburn hair pressed to the ground, and NufIIdAAngAAn was about to sink her teeth into his shoulder. He wrenched away at the last moment, but they grappled and soon he was being pinned down again.
Wally had sprung to his feet, gripping his sword and facing off with ZaNNdy, who clambered to his feet, panting heavily.
"Kuki!" Wally called to me, rather loudly, since he was only a few feet away. "Can you tame them once more? If not, run away!"
Hearing his strong, clear voice jolted me out of the ogre's persuasive trance. I thought of honey and oil coating my throat again as I called out in Ogrese, concentrating on making my voice sound soft and lisping. "ZaNNdy, NufIIdAAngAAn, all my ogre friends! Why do you attack those who are trying to help you? They have prepared a great feast for you, but cannot bring it forth if you act in this manner."
The ogres had stopped biting and clawing and beating on the knights. They gazed at me with hopeful, trusting eyes.
"Yes," I confirmed silkily, "these brave men have two dozen plump baby giants waiting for you. It will be such a magnificent feast."
ZaNNdy smiled blankly at me, and the others sent me dopey grins and eager looks of longing.
"But they cannot bring them out unless you cooperate. Once they have bound your hands and feet and gagged you, they will bring the babies out and then untie your binds. If you let them do it, they will be gentle and careful."
"Sit down," ZaNNdy commanded his pack, offering his wrists to Wally. The other ogres shook the ground as they fell to his complacently, remaining still so that the knights could wrap them in ropes and chains. Once the last gag was in place, Wally straightened, wiping at his brow. I could not stop myself from watching a single bead of sweat trickle down his glistening throat and disappear beneath the collar of his tunic. I jerked my eyes up to his as he turned to face me.
"Kuki," he grinned, white teeth flashing, "It is so good to see you."
YAY Wally! About time, right? Can you guess which character from the show NufIIdAAngAAn is supposed to be? It's real easy; I just had to change up her name to make it more like ZaNNdy's which is what I too had to change into an Ogrese-type name. And who is ZaNNdy you may ask? Try to figure it out, It's easier to figure out than NufIIdAAngAAn, I can promise you that. Please review! Thanks y'all!
Any one catch the Lion King Reference? Hehe, I couldn't resist.
Next Chapter: We meet Wally's knights in shining armour, can you guess who they are? I'm telling you know, next chapter is less than 2,000 words, so it's gonna be up soon! There was really not much to add, and I wanted to give you guys a cliff hanger of sorts here.
Please Review,
LatinMagicWriter is on fire