summersantos2009 Thank you.

Guest She has her reasons. And, don't worry, that phase won't last for long.

ren-mccullers-Emily can cook, it's Paige that can't. At least in this version. But I'm glad you liked the chapter.

Tns729 Thank you.

Author's Note: So, how about that finale? Some twisted stuff going on there.

I missed last week, so you get two this week. Hope nobody minds. :p

Chapter 18

She'd barely made it to the end of the hallway when her phone buzzed in her pocket, it's vibration echoing loudling in the empy corridor. Emily ignored it and kept walking. She had no real destination in mind, she just needed to get away, to be moving. Her thoughts were an angry buzz as she mounted staircases, descened others, her steps taking her in a sweeping circle around the school. She passed only a few people, everyone was either in class or on lunch, dining in the cafeteria or off campus.

Her phone buzzed intermittenly and she continued to ignore it. Let Paige know how it felt for a little while. She really didn't understand why Paige was behaving the way she was. Unfortunately, the missed texts were probably her only clue. Reluctantly, she pulled her phone from her pocket.

I'm sorry, Em. Followed by a sad face and few x's and o's.

I'm sorry. I panicked.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

Can we talk?

Call me back.

Em, where are you?

Emily was reading the last text when her phone buzzed again, a call this time, not a message. Her thumb hovered over the ignore button before drifting towards answer.They did need to have this conversation. She just wasn't sure if now was the best time. She was hurt and frustrated and liable to say something she'd regret. She pushed ignore and waited for the voicemail. Instead, Paige hung up and a text came through.

Please answer me, Em.

Followed quickly by another call. Sighing heavily, Emily answered.

"Em?" Paige's voice was soft and uncertain. "Where are you? I'm coming to find you."

"I'm surprised you even noticed I was gone."

There was a beat of silence on the other end, followed by a soft sigh. "I suppose that's fair. Look, I want to talk about this, but not over the phone. Can you please tell me where you are?"

Emily had to look around to figure that out for herself. She'd been walking without paying attention to where she was. "Tech wing," she said after a moment, identifying some of the posters adorning the walls as advertisements for an engineering club and some kind of robotics tournament.

"Ok. Meet me in the bathroom at the end of the hall, just before the double doors."

Clearly Paige was more familiar with this area of the school than she was because, sure enough, when she glanced down to the far end of the hallway she spotted a ladies room. Probably an ill used one, she imagined, not without some bitterness. Weren't to many females in the tech and engineering classes, not much chance that anyone would walk in on them.

"Fine." She hung up and made her way down the halway and into the bathroom, which was, as expected, empty. She crossed the room to the sinks and hoisted herself up onto the counter. She stared at the door, counting the seconds before it would swing open and Paige would come bursting in. She made it to 180 when the door swung open so hard it bounced off the wall and caught Paige in the shoulder and the side of the head as she careened through it.

"Oh my God, Paige." She forgot she was mad at her for a moment as she watched her stagger backwards and then stumble forward, leaning heavily against the tiled wall for balance with one hand, the other pressed against her face. "Are you okay?" She slid from the counter and closed the distance between. "Let me see." She tired to pry Paige's hand away but the other girl shook her off.

"I'm fine. I'm fine." But, she wasn't acting like she was fine. She reached the sinks and doubled over, now cradling her head in both hands.

"You're not fine." She ran her hand across Paige's shoulder, trying to sooth her and get her to stand up upright so she could get a look. "You're bleeding." She could see a thin trail of blood making it's way down the side of the other girl's face.

"What? Fuck." Paige pulled her hand away and stared down at it, then turned her attention to her reflection in the mirror.

Emily took the opportunity to examine the gash, prodding it gently with her fingers despite the soft hiss that it elicited from the other girl. "It doesn't look too deep. I don't think it'll need stitches. How's your head feel? Are you concussed?" She moved away from her, reaching for a handful of papertowels. She ran them under cold water and then pressed them to the Paige's temple.

"I'm fine," Paige grumbled and took the papertowels from her, pacing away as she did so. Emily's hands fell to her side. She felt useless and helpless as she stared at the other girl's back. The situation would be funny if it weren't so sad. Paige rushing to her, literally hurting herself to get to her.

She could see that the other girl's face was beat red, from the exertion of hurrying here and from embarrasment no doubt. She watched as Paige's shoulders slumped forward, futher and further.

Emily just knew that whatever she had to say, Paige's silent criminations were much harsher. Just watching the other girl, her own anger drained away. It pained her to watch the other girl beat herself up over her behaviour. She took a step towards her, then another. Before she'd reached her, could say anything to comfort her, Paige spun around.

"I'm sorry, Emily. I'm so, so sorry." Her eyes were wide and pleading, shining with emotion and unshed tears. Her voice was strained and plaintive. "I don't know what came over me. I just-"

"Panicked. I know." Emily closed the distance between them and took Paige's hand in her own, squeezing it gently in hopes that the physical contact would ground Paige for the conversation they were about to have. "You're scared. And I get that. But Paige-"

"You said you understood. You said you wouldn't pressure me to come out!" Paige tried to pull her hand from Emily's, but Emily tightened her grip, refusing to let her. "I told you, my parents, they-"

"Hey, easy. This isn't about that. I know you're not ready to come out. And I'm not saying you need to do that." Paige stopped her struggling and just stood there, chest heaving as she attempted to catch her breath after her outburst.

"Oh."

"Yeah, Oh." Emily attempted to tease a smile out of the other girl, but Paige's expression remined one of pained confusion. "I guess I'm just confused about what happened. Yesterday, we agreed that at school we would be friends. And then you dodged me this morning and you wouldn't even look at me at lunch. It hurt."

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are." It practically eminated from her, it was in her stance, in the sloped set of her shoulders, in the furrow of her brow, the way she worried her bottom lip between her teeth.

"I don't want you to be sorry. I just want to know what's going on." She tugged Paige a little closer her, smiling a little as the other girl allowed herself to be guided forward. She gently took the makeshift compress from Paige's hand and pulled it away to see the damage. The cut had mostly stopped bleeding, just a small little trickle, which she dabbed away. "Talk to me, Paige. What's going on in that pretty litltle head of yours?"

Paige sighed softly. "I meant it, yesterday. When I said that we would be friends at school. That I didn't care what people thought, if there were rumours."

Emily nodded. She didn't doubt that. She was just wondering what had changed. Was it the weight of what they had done last night? The reality of what it would mean for them to have people speculating about their relationship when it was more than just rumours?

"I thought the hardest thing would be keeping my hands off you when I ran into you in the halls."

Emily couldn't help but murmur in agreement, even though she'd known this would be more complicated than that.

"We were texting this morning and it was great." Paige smiled soflty at her, and Emily returned the gesture. It had been nice, their conversation this morning. "And I really was looking forward to seeing you. But when I actually saw you walking toward me I just...my heart started racing and I couldn't breath. But, not in that good, eager way. It was more, full on panic attack. I felt like every eye in the hallway was on me, and suddenly they knew, what I was, what we'd done. And I just...I'm sorry, Em." She could see the tears gathering in the corners of Paige's eyes, and felt her own eyes begin to sting in sympathy.

"Hey, no. No more apologies." She tossed the sodden papertowel into the sink and used her thumbs to catch the teardrops before they fell. "I know if feels like the whole world is watching you, judging you. But nobody else knows about you. Or about us."

Paige nodded. "I know. But, like I said. I panicked. After I calmed down, we texted and it was good. I thought I was fine. And then Spencer suggested I eat lunch with you guys and I wanted to I just..."

"Panicked again." Emily filled in the blanks for her. She did understand where Paige was coming from. It didn't make it any less painful to be given the cold shoulder. Nor did it make it any easier to deal with.

"I thought I could do this." Paige sounded so forlorn and it made Emily's heart ache. "But it's been a day and I'm already making a mess of things."

"You're right, it's been a day. Only one day. We knew this was going to be tough. And we're going to have to work to figure things out."

"So you're not breaking up with me?"

"What? Paige no. Is that what you thought?"

Silently, Paige nodded.

"Oh, honey." She caressed Paige's cheek gently. "No. I was hurt. And I was angry. But I hadn't given up," Paige turned into the touch, her eyelids fluttering a little. "We'll figure this out."

Even as she said the words, she wondered what the possible solution might look like. Did they go back to ignoring each other in the hallways? Training on opposite schedules, all the while texting each other and meeting in secret? It wasn't an appealing option. But she wasn't sure what other choice they had. Not while Paige was still so afraid.

She just worried that the added secrecy would be even more a strain for the other girl. She'd really hoped that Paige would be comfortable enough around her friends to be open around them. That having a few more people who knew the truth would be a comfort instead of a source of confusion.

"Look, I'm sorry about Spencer. She's well meaning, but she can be a bit intense at times. I'll talk to her. And, I'll make sure that the others-"

"No. Don't. I had fun today, at lunch. I mean, I almost hyperventilated at sitting next to you, but your friends are nice. Caleb and I already sort of know each other. And Hannah is..."

"Hannah. Yes. I know." The two of them exchanged wry smiles.

"So, where does this leave us?"

"Well, I guess we keep our distance at school. If you feel comfortable enough, you can eat with me and my friends. And if not, we'll spend our time together outside of school. We can hang at my place. My mom knows about us. And she's not exactly a pillar of support, but she's trying. And your parents aren't around a lot-"

"Um, about that." Paige's gaze cut away, flitting around the room instead of meeting Emily's eye. "My Mom..."

"You're mom, what?"

"I guess she does know you're gay after all. We were sitting there at breakfast and she starts going on about how she thinks it's great that I can look past the sin and see the person but she's worried about me...Long story short, it's probably best if she doesn't come home and find you in my bedroom anymore."

"Oh." Emily tried not to feel hurt and dissapointed. She knew what Paige's parents were like, she'd been there herself and Paige had tried to explain. Se wondered if Paige's reactions today were in direct response to whatever it was that her mom had said to her at breakfast. "OK. so my place then. And we'll go out of town a lot."

It wasn't ideal. And she honestly didn't know how Paige would react to being with her in public, even surrounded by strangers. But, it was an issue they were going to have to face at some point.

"I don't like it either," Paige said softly. "I'm sorry."

Emily was tired of hearing Paige apologize. Especially for things that were out of her control. She was trying so hard to be ready for Emily, trying to push herself past her limits. "You have nothing to be sorry for." Using the hand that was cupping Paige's cheek she guided her in for a kiss, brushing her lips softly, but pulling back when Paige moaned softly and attempted to deepen it. As much as she wanted to, there was too great a risk of being caught.

Paige pouted adorably and Emily couldn't resist kissing her again, once again keeping it brief.

"All right, McCullers, get to class," she said as she pulled back, jarring the other girl out of her slightly dazed state. She laughed as Paige blinked and then scowled, but the warning bell signaling there was only a few minutes until the next perioud sounded and the other girl had no choice but to listen. Emily silently leered at her as she followed her out of the room, feigning innocence when Paige glanced back over her shoulder before opening the door.

"Pervert," Paige muttered as she ushered her out, making her laugh as she stepped out into the hallway, which was slowly filling with students.