Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. They belong to Cecily von Zeigesar and The CW.

"Are we ready?" Blair took a deep breath as she lowered their little boy into the infant carrier. They'd been in the hospital for three days. They'd asked the nurses and doctors every question they could think of on how to care for an infant. Now they were about to be discharged. Luca was dressed in the most handsome little suit, tailor made by Blair's mother at her request, complete with a little bowtie.

"Can we ever be ready?" Chuck asked as he watched Blair fiddle with Luca's outfit, making sure that it was straight and that the little bowtie wasn't going to obstruct his breathing. To say she was an overprotective mother was putting it mildly.

"Good point, let's just stay here for the next eighteen years," she replied.

"We aren't doing this alone," Chuck reminded her. Lily, Eleanor and Serena were all staying in their home for the next few weeks to help them out.

"This is so nerve wracking," she replied as she buckled Luca in, "Every little decision that we make can influence who this person is going to be. What if we screw him up?"

"Then we'll unleash another Chuck Bass on the world," he chuckled.

"That's not funny," she glared at him.

"I'm sure that every new parent feels the same way we are currently feeling," Chuck tried to soothe her frazzled nerves. In truth, he was feeling just as panicked and unsure of himself as she was. Now wasn't the time to show it. At least Blair was able to hold Luca without him screaming his little head off. Chuck wasn't so lucky. "If you are truly feeling unprepared, we can stay a few more days, but you'll only be delaying the inevitable."

"I know," she sighed as she finished buckling Luca into the carrier before she bent over to kiss his tiny little hand. She hadn't been able to stop kissing him since he was born. His skin felt so soft and warm, and he smelt so good.

"I'll go get our discharge paperwork," Chuck stated as he kissed her forehead.

"Okay," she nodded as she gave him a nervous smile. Chuck disappeared, leaving her alone with her son. Luca's eyes appeared to lock with hers. "I'm going to try my best, Luca, but you have to take it easy on me and Daddy. We don't really know what we're doing here." Luca cooed in response as she bent in again and kissed his hands repeatedly. She was still kissing him when Chuck returned with the necessary paperwork.

"We're ready to go," Chuck replied as he grasped her suitcase and diaper bag, "Grab the kid."

"Grab the kid," she scoffed, "I promise Daddy is just being silly. He would never really be so casual regarding your care and wellbeing."

The ride to their home was even more nerve wracking than actually leaving the hospital. It took Blair and Chuck several minutes to get the carrier secured in the backseat. Every time they felt Arthur apply the brakes, even just slightly, they reached for the carrier as if it was about to fly to the floor. If only they knew how panicked Arthur was in the driver's seat. He too was feeling apprehensive about shuttling the newest Bass around. He'd never had such precious cargo before.

"We're going to hover over this poor thing for weeks, aren't we?" Chuck realized as he took Luca's free hand into his. Blair had already claimed the other one and was babbling in an unintelligible language as a way of entertaining him as she hovered above him.

"Months," Blair corrected him, "He's going to learn how to talk quicker than any baby in the world just so he can tell us to go away."

Chuck could only laugh in reply as they pulled up in front of their home. Blair took another deep, cleansing breath to settle the nerves as they climbed out of the limo. She looked at the steps leading to their front door and groaned. She was still pretty sore, and each step up was going to hurt.

"I'll take him," Chuck offered as he handed the suitcase and diaper bag to Arthur, who he noticed looked a little shaky. He hoped his driver wasn't getting sick on him. If only he'd realized how nervous Arthur had been on the short trip from the hospital.

"Refresh my memory. Why did I want steps?" she inquired as she linked her arm into his as they started their climb.

"Because you wanted the idyllic home with all the comforts you were denied growing up," he replied as he took each step slowly, "You'll be appreciating these steps again in a few days when you're feeling better."

"We didn't really think this through," she replied as she winced slightly with each step, "We're going to have to lug Luca's stroller all the way down these stairs each time we want to take him for a walk or on an outing."

"We do have people to help us with that," Chuck reminded her, "I'm sure Arthur will be happy to carry the stroller up and down the stairs, won't you, Arthur."

"Oh yes, Mister Bass, I cannot tell you how much I'm looking forward to it," his loyal driver responded sarcastically as the jitters began to subside, "I lay awake at night just thinking about how much fun it is going to be for me."

"See, problem solved," Chuck laughed as they reached the top step. Chuck was about to open the door and step inside, but Blair reached out to stop him.

"I want to carry him inside," Blair explained as she set the carrier down and unbuckled Luca. Once he was secure in her arms she nodded towards the door to signal to Chuck that she was ready to step inside.

"Welcome home, Luca," Chuck stated as Blair crossed the threshold.

"Welcome home," Serena exclaimed as she popped out of her hiding space, surprising Blair, Chuck, and a now wailing Luca.

"Thanks, Serena, his lungs needed a good workout," Blair glared at her best friend.

"I hear a little baby," Lily stated as she and Eleanor appeared in the entryway, "It's been years since I've heard that sound and still had the urge to want to hold the precious little thing. Would you mind, Blair?"

"No, of course not," Blair replied as she transferred Luca into her arms, "Go to Grandma Lily, Luca."

"Lily, you look too young to be a grandmother," Eleanor chimed in.

"So do you," Lily laughed as she pranced around with Luca, trying every trick she could remember to get the baby to calm down.

"He's probably hungry," Blair stated as Luca continued to cry at his top volume, "It's been a few hours since I last fed him."

"I'll feed him," Serena offered as her hand shot up like a bookworm sitting in the front row of a classroom.

"Not sure those things are in working order," Chuck replied as he motioned briefly towards Serena's chest.

"Don't you have baby food or something I can give him?" she frowned.

"He's too young for baby food," Lily replied.

"Oh," Serena replied as she gave her mother's words a bit of thought before it finally occurred to her what Blair meant by feeding Luca, "OH! I guess I won't be feeding Luca. Can I at least burp him or something? I haven't been able to do hardly anything. Blair hardly let me hold him at the hospital."

"Tell you what, I'll let you change his next diaper," Chuck offered.

"With any luck, it will be one of those really stinky ones like the one that made me gag yesterday," Blair giggled into his ear before she turned to her mother-in-law, "I'll take him, Lily."

"Is there anything I can do?" Serena inquired with a slight pout as Blair reclaimed her son.

"Yes," Blair nodded, "Could you go ask Rosa if she could make some of her mint hot cocoa for me?"

"Absolutely, just think of me as your personal servant," Serena offered.

"The possibilities are endless," Blair laughed as Serena darted off on her mission, "I'm going to take him up to the nursery."

"Go get settled, Sweetheart," Eleanor replied, "Let us know if you need anything."

"I will," she replied as she and Chuck wandered off while giving Luca a brief tour of his new home as they went.

"…And this is your room," Blair stated as they entered the nursery, "And look, Daddy already had your name painted on the wall. He's so efficient, and he's added teddy bears to the room. Really, Chuck, teddy bears?"

"Do you not like them?" Chuck inquired as he motioned towards the mural on the wall and accessories scattered around the room, "I thought they'd go nicely with the mobile."

"I just never thought that teddy bears would be your thing," she replied, "I think they are adorable."

"Our son deserves adorable," Chuck stated.

"You're so different as a father," Blair marveled, "In a good way, you're softer."

"Does that mean I'm getting pudgy?" he inquired as he patted his belly.

"You might have gained a few pounds of sympathy weight with my pregnancy," she chuckled, "But no that's not what I meant. Maybe gentler is a better way of putting it."

"I'll take gentler," he replied as he ushered her towards the overstuffed chair and helped her get comfortable.

"Now this room feels complete," Blair sighed as she looked around at the additional furnishing Chuck had added as she fed Luca.

"It feels complete because Luca is in it," Chuck replied as he took a hold of Luca's hand, desperately needing to feel like a part of this moment Blair was sharing with him.

"He looks so cute in his little suit," Blair replied as she tugged lightly at the bowtie.

"I still think he's a tad overdressed," Chuck replied, "We should be more casual with his attire, at least while he's home. I'm not even in a suit today."

"Well today is a special day for him," she stated, "I wanted something that reflected how much."

"When you're done feeding him, perhaps we could put him in something a bit more comfortable," he suggested.

"After we take a couple of pictures of him in his crib. We have to capture this day for all of posterity," she insisted.

"Where did you put the camera?" he inquired. She'd been a little shutterbug at the hospital, capturing nearly every moment of Luca's life when she wasn't holding him, and demanding that her husband capture the moments she was. They'd already filled up multiple memory cards.

"In the diaper bag," Blair replied as she motioned towards the bag by the nursery door.

"You know, I haven't taken a picture yet of Luca being fed," he stated as he pulled the camera out and turned it on.

"Chuck, I look horrible," Blair screeched as she held out her hand to obstruct the camera's view.

"You look beautiful," he assured her as he maneuvered around her hand and took the picture.

"You're lucky I have a baby in my hands," she glared at him before returning her attention to her son, "He's so handsome. He looks like his daddy."

"It's not all me," Chuck replied as he stepped forward and touched Luca's little nose, "This is yours. His eyes are yours. His ears are yours."

"These cheekbones are yours. These lips are yours. This tuft of hair is yours," she replied.

"That could be yours too," he stated as his fingers tangled in her brunette locks. She hadn't taken the time to style her hair or put on a stitch of makeup, deeming Luca's needs to be more important than her own, but she still looked beautiful.

"No, I'm certain this is yours," she smirked, "Only your son could be this covered in hair so early. I was nearly bald until my second birthday."

"Is that your way of complaining about how hairy I am?" he chuckled, "Do I need to make an appointment with an esthetician?"

"Don't you dare," she gasped in horror, "I like you hairy. I like running my fingers through that hairy chest of yours after we've made love."

"Seems like forever ago," he sighed.

"We did try a few days ago," she reminded him.

"Yes, and we stopped before the good parts," he refreshed her memory, "And now we have to wait what feels like forever before we can again."

"It's just a few months," she insisted, "We've had longer dry spells than that before."

"Yes, but that was when you couldn't tolerate being in the same room as me. We share a bed now, remember."

"I definitely do," she smiled as she looked at the ring on his left hand before she looked to her hand, "Chuck, can you find my rings? I think they'll fit again."

Chuck nodded as he disappeared.

"Finally some alone time," Blair smiled as she wrapped her son's hand around one of her fingers, "We love Daddy, but he's been hovering since the moment you popped out. I promise he means well."

Luca's eyes drifted closed as he continued feeding. She knew these bonding moments were difficult for Chuck. He didn't have this same opportunity to bond with his son. As a result, Luca wasn't as comfortable with him as he was with her. In her arms, he drifted in and out of consciousness with a quiet disposition. With Chuck, he was fussy and squirmy and usually crying his lungs out. There was a clear frustration written across Chuck's face.

"Now Luca, we need to have our first mother to son talk," Blair stated. Luca's eyes came open in recognition of her voice. "Your daddy loves you more than anything in this world, and he will do absolutely anything for you. In return, you need to be gentle with him. He hasn't had eight, almost nine, months to bond with you the way I have, and that's not his fault. He will be the best daddy in the world to you, but you have to let him. No more squirming in his arms when he holds you. No more trying to shatter his eardrums with your crying. In return, I will get Daddy to relax when he holds you. Do we have a deal?"

Luca stared blankly at his mother, but he did manage to squeeze her hand slightly. She took that as his agreement to her proposition.

Chuck returned minutes later with her wedding and engagement ring in one hand and her hot cocoa in the other.

"I'd forgotten that we locked your rings up in our office safe," he stated as he knelt before her as he did when he'd proposed with the engagement ring extended, "I nearly had a heart attack when I didn't find them in your jewelry box. I almost accused poor Rosa."

"Shame on you," Blair scolded him as she freed her finger from Luca's hand and extended her hand to Chuck. She was grateful that the rings slid right back into place.

"I felt awful even thinking it," he nodded his head in agreement as he bent forward to kiss her hand, "Fortunately the office is on the way to her kitchen."

"Will you burp him when he's finished?" she requested, "I want to take a quick shower. The hospital shower head left a lot to be desired."

"Are you trying to exercise his lungs again?" Chuck frowned, "Maybe we can call Serena up to do it. She's so anxious to pitch in."

"I want you to do it," Blair stated calmly, "You're going to have to figure out a way to hold this little boy."

"I know how to hold him," he replied defensively, "He just screams bloody murder when I do."

"You just need to relax," she insisted, "You tense up when he's in your arms. I know he's really tiny and feels very fragile, but you're not going to break him."

"I don't know how to hold a baby, Blair," he stated, "I've never cared enough before now to want to hold one."

"But you care about Luca, so it's time you learn," she insisted as Luca's lips dropped away from her breast, showing his excellent timing. She rose up from the chair and instructed her husband to take a seat.

"Blair, this can wait," Chuck replied as he sunk into the chair with the knowledge that he didn't have any other option.

"No, it can't," she replied as she handed him a burping cloth to put over his shoulder, "You are going to figure this out right now. Now I command you to relax."

"Forcing a baby into my arms is not going to get me to relax," he scowled at her as he adjusted the cloth on his shoulder.

"Quit being such a pain in the ass," she returned his scowl with one of her own, "Now hold out your arms."

"I guess that PG rating went up to thirteen for a few moments," Chuck did as he was told though the scowl stayed pasted on his face as Blair lowered Luca into his arms. He could see his son suck in a gulp of air just before he started crying.

"Take a deep breath," Blair instructed Chuck, "I know it's hard with him crying, but you have to find a way. This is what being a parent is all about, finding a way."

Chuck took a few deep breaths. He tried to relax. He tried to calm his son, but it was no use. All Luca wanted to do was scream. He even tried to hand Luca back to his mother, but Blair had disappeared from the room. He was trapped, and he knew it.

"Okay, Luca," Chuck took another deep breath in a last ditch effort to calm himself as he shifted Luca to his shoulder and began rubbing his back, "We haven't gotten off to a very good start here, but we need to figure this out. We can't keep running to Mommy. We men need to stick together because odds are we're going to be outnumbered eventually, if we're not already."

Luca's cries began to soften.

"I can imagine how confusing this time is for you. You were well cared for in Mommy's tummy for almost nine months, and now you're out here. It must seem like you have to fend for yourself, but I promise you that is not true. Mommy and I will take exceptional care of you, but you have to let us," Chuck continued to speak to his son. A tiny burp interrupted his train of thought. "That was a good one, Luca."

Luca stopped crying.

"How about we get you out of this little suit?" Chuck suggested as he gingerly stood up and brought Luca into the closet where all his baby clothes were hanging. Chuck couldn't believe the sheer volume of clothes hanging. Luca could very well never wear the same item of clothing twice for the first few years of his life. "Mommy has excellent taste, but I think this is a little too formal. How about we pick out something a little more comfortable?"

He flipped through all the possible newborn options until he found a cute little teddy bear onesie that was the first article of clothing that Blair purchased for the baby. It seemed appropriate.

Laying Luca down on the changing table, Chuck removed the little suit that he was wearing and set it aside. He was about to slip on the onesie when he had a thought.

"I should change your diaper first, shouldn't I," Chuck thought out loud. Having successfully changed a few diapers already at the hospital, Chuck knew he could handle this endeavor solo. He had all the necessary supplies within easy reach, so he stripped off the diaper. Sure enough it was soiled. Thinking himself pretty smart, he worked quickly to get the second diaper on when it happened. Luca was peeing on him. What was worse was that Blair had come in having taken the quickest shower of her life to witness the moment.

"Luca, it's not nice to pee on Daddy," Blair cackled with laughter as she nuzzled her nose against her son's cheek, "But it's also very funny."

"Just you wait," Chuck glared at her as he finished his task before he'd let himself get cleaned up, "He'll pee on you."

"I'm just glad that it was you the first time," she chuckled as she stood up straight and kissed her husband's cheek. "I see you figured things out."

"I wouldn't exactly use getting urinated on as an example of figuring things out, but he's not screaming. Progress was made," he conceded as he put Luca in the onesie.

Blair picked him up and cradled him in her arms.

"I'm going to change," Chuck announced.

"Good idea," Blair bit back a snicker that tried to escape, as she danced around with Luca in her arms, trying to lull him to sleep, "We won't be going anywhere."

"I'll be back soon," he vowed as he kissed his family quickly.

"Everything going okay?" Serena inquired as she met Chuck just outside Luca's nursery.

"Just fine," Chuck nodded.

"We heard him crying," Serena stated, "Anything I can do to help."

"I could use a hug," Chuck responded with a solemn expression.

"Is Luca still screaming when you hold him?" Serena stuck out her lip in a sympathetic pout as she stepped forward to hug him, "He'll warm up to you, I promise."

Chuck had a Cheshire grin on his face as Serena suddenly tensed in his arms.

"Chuck, why are you wet?"

"Oh, right, I forgot. Luca just peed on me," he replied.

"Ewwwwww, Chuck, what's the matter with you," Serena shrieked as she slapped his shoulder, "Gross, now I have to change. You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

He began chuckling as he watched his sister storm off. Getting under Serena's skin made getting urinated by his son worth it.

TBC. . .