Author's Note: Happy New Year. Thanks for the follows and reviews. They mean the absolute world to me. One more chapter after this. Hope you all enjoy this chapter as well!

The Loneliness of Good Fortunes
Chapter Four

Haru looked up as one of the trains coming southbound pulled into the station. It had probably came from Tokyo, probably pulled to one of the stops just hours ago. Haru took in a deep breath and felt a certain tightness in his throat. A claustrophobic feeling. He hadn't visited Tokyo before, but he could imagine just how busy it was there.

He checked the clock. Only a few more minutes until his train should be puling up. The one heading towards Tokyo.

Idly, he scanned the rushing crowd, but his eyes stopped when he saw a familiar, taller figure. His body stopped, and felt his stomach fall when Sousuke's line of sight landed on him. Haru looked away, but he already knew Sousuke was heading towards him. Staring at the ground, he could see Sousuke's nearing steps until his sneakers were only inches from his own.

Haru looked up to see Sousuke's hardened stare.

"You two are back from Australia already? Damn. I was hoping to meet Rin at the house before," Sousuke said.

Haru nodded.

"Is Rin back at the house?" He asked with a tilt of his head.

Haru nodded.

Sousuke laughed and shook his head. "I can see why Rin was so excited to bunk with you," he said dryly, and Haru furrowed his brows. What Haru didn't understand was why he had been the one to bunk with Rin? Sure, he had wished to go to the same school as Rin—Haru figured it'd be nice to have a familiar face—but he'd expected Sousuke to be there too.

"Anyways, see you later," Sousuke said as he turned to walk away.

"Why aren't you in Australia with Rin? Didn't you get a scholarship?"

Sousuke stopped, looked to the side over his shoulder with a stare that wasn't his normal, casual glare. No, it was clear Haru had hit a nerve. He shifted a bit in his seat, and looked at Sousuke with furrowed brows.

"Either Rin didn't tell you, or you're just trying to piss me off. Seeing as I'm sure Rin's told you by now, then you're just trying to piss me off."

"What?" Haru shook his head and looked over his shoulder at the clock over on the central pillar. The train should be there any second. "I wasn't trying to-"

"The physical therapy is going well, but I don't think I'll be in Australia anytime soon," Sousuke said with a laugh, but Haru could tell there was no humor behind it.

"What are you talking about?"

Sousuke glared at him. "My shoulder? Rin had to have told you..." He clenched his hands into fists. "Guess he doesn't bring me up to you. Why would he?"

Haru blinked. His shoulder? Physical therapy? When had this happened? Haru would have to ask Rin about that later. He glanced back behind Sousuke's shoulder to see the train taking off that Sousuke had just got off of.

"Why were you in Tokyo?" He asked. Again, it was hard to keep the blunt questions to himself.

"I was with Makoto and Kisumi."

"Why?"

Sousuke frowned. "They're close by. We've been hanging out." Sousuke smirked. "Why do you look so upset? You've moved on. Why can't Makoto do the same?"

"I didn't move on," Haru said, glaring. He didn't like Sousuke talking about Makoto like he knew him. They'd been friends for however long had passed since high school in this strange, future. For Haru, that meant all of a three days. How could Sousuke have possibly known anything about Makoto in the span of three days?

Another train entered the station, coming to a steady roll along the tracks. It was his train. Haru stood up, still looking up at Sousuke with a heated glare.

Sousuke laughed. "You're going to Tokyo?" He shook his head. "You think you can have it all don't you, Nanase? A future with Rin following your dreams, and Makoto, too? Some of us don't even get a future, you know." Sousuke rolled his shoulder.

"Swimming with Rin isn't my dream," Haru said as he turned to walk away. Until he felt the rough squeeze on his shoulders from Sousuke's large hands and suddenly he was facing Sousuke again, the back of his knees bumping into the chairs behind him. Haru could practically see the intricacy of veins on Sousuke's broad forehead.

"Then why did you go to Australia? It's a waste of time if it isn't your dream."

Haru shook his head and grabbed Sousuke's wrist, pushing his hand off his shoulder as he took a step away. "I need to go."

"All that talent you're wasting." Sousuke let him go, his lip pulled back into a snarl. "Makoto's happy with Kisumi. You've gotten in the middle of enough relationships, don't you think?"

Haru stopped, stared at the ground as he listened to Sousuke's trailing footsteps. He opened his mouth to retort, to say anything, but Sousuke was already long gone. He scowled and ran his fingers through his hair.

He looked at the train to Tokyo, but just the idea of seeing Makoto and Kisumi together made Haru's stomach flip. He couldn't get on. So instead he ran back to a comforting, familiar place where he could just think.

–

Even the bath couldn't bring Haru comfort. His own bath that he used to soak in for hours whenever he had a problem. Thinking on it while his hands and toes pruned was the simple solution. It was a way for Haru to think on his own feelings; to sort them safely in his head.

But there was no solution for this. And Haru wasn't trying to sort his feelings, no, he wanted to drown them out completely. Makoto and Kisumi...

Haru sank lower into the tub and closed his head. His head ached. Lower and lower he sank until he was under the surface, staring up at the quivering ceiling above him.

Makoto and Kisumi...as if Haru had any reason to be surprised. It had been that way in middle school. Kisumi fought over Makoto's affection and baited Haru as well. Kisumi was good at getting under Haru's skin.

Haru sighed and the stream of bubbles rose to the surface. He sat up, his head down, water droplets falling from his nose to fall back into the water.

Haru couldn't help but wonder—as he lay there, dozing off into a sleep that he hoped would save him from an hour or two of this sick, sick feeling—if Kisumi was the reason Makoto wanted to move on so badly.

Haru figured as much, up until the moment he fell asleep.

And sitting neatly on the very corner of the sink beside him was the Good Fortunes card.

–

Makoto stuffed his Good Fortunes card into his pocket and walked forward, over thick roots and the brush that covered the dirt path that lined the languid stream. Or at least, Makoto noticed as he bent to his knees and stared at the water, it used to be languid. Now it was rushing, frothing.

Makoto stood up and dusted off his knees. Everything was calm, but he knew what the red thread was leading him too. He had had this dream too many times in the past. A nearby memory that could never quite leave Makoto be. Not in wake, nor sleep.

He shook his head. No, maybe this time was different. He couldn't hear the splashing. His own cries, the panic taut in his voice.

Makoto swallowed and walked faster, his eyes trained on the red thread that mingled with the twigs and leaves covering the ground. He pushed past the steadily growing branches that moved to block his view. A cut along his cheek from a stubborn, sharp branch that grazed against his face. He winced, ran a shaking hand through his hair as the water picked up like a steady stream between his ears. Echoing. Loud. This was just a dream.

And like last time...Haru would be at the end of this thread. Makoto felt his heart quicken in anticipation of seeing him. If they couldn't see each other in reality, then did that mean this was the demon's plan? To allow them to see each other in dreams like this? As long as they followed the red thread. Makoto liked to think as much.

Makoto tripped and stumbled. Could the demon have been the one trying to keep them apart? But Makoto pushed past the heavy shrubbery of a branch and stopped when he saw Haru there in the middle of the river.

"Haru!" He cried out, but there Haru stood, not as a boy like in every other dream, but as he was now. As he had been the other night they'd seen each other. He stood tall, the water reaching just past his knees. He remembered the way the water reached to Haru's jaw, splashed, covered his open mouth. Soon his head would bob underneath the water and wouldn't reappear. At least, that was how this dream usually went.

Haru looked at him with a look of shock that passed over his face briefly. He looked away. "Dreaming too? Did you...mean to come find me?"

Makoto nodded, looking at the red thread that trailed into the stream. He wanted to follow it. He moved forward but as soon as his shoes stepped into the water he stopped, lost his breath. He looked up with raised brows, mouth open.

"What are you doing there?"

Haru swallowed. "I was coming to see you...in Tokyo..." He didn't look at Makoto, looked to the side at the water that pushed his legs.

Makoto pulled at the collar of his shirt. Watching Haru, he grew steadily more nervous as the water grew angrier with every few moments that passed. "Now? But you're-"

"In the real world. When we're awake."

Makoto rubbed the back of his neck and shook his head. "Okay..." he said, trying to follow Haru's trail of thought. "Sousuke said you were in Iwtaobi, didn't he? You were coming to visit me?"

Haru narrowed his eyes. "You're with Kisumi." He didn't ask, he accused, and Makoto's cheeks grew hot. Embarrassed, shameful of this past, no this future, he had created for himself. He hadn't even known.

"I didn't chose to..."

Haru's brows quirked as if to say "Don't lie to me," and Makoto should have known better. When had he started lying to his best friend?

"Haru...please come out of there. We'll talk."

The water kicked up, frothy, white and splashing at Haru's knees that moved. He stumbled forward and Makoto reached his arms out but couldn't make his feet move. They felt buried. Stuck. This wasn't how he was supposed to feel with this new future he had wished for. He was supposed to feel as Haru put it: free.

Haru steadied himself. "You've always liked Kisumi? Is that the reason you wanted to go to Tokyo? Away from me, so you could be with him."

"No, that's not true at all." Makoto's heart quickened. He swallowed and looked at the water. It was loud. Too loud. "Haru...you know as well as I do that we just...landed in our futures. I didn't chose to..."

"The demon said we were going to get the futures we wished for the most."

"Well, are you happy?" Makoto asked and watched as Haru stumbled forward again, and suddenly clutched his head, teeth grit as he squeezed his eyes shut. "Haru?"

"I'm not happy," Haru said, his voice weak as he looked at Makoto with tired eyes. And suddenly his eyes rolled back into his head and he was falling towards the rushing water.

"Haru!" Makoto reached forward, feet ripping free from the muddy earth, but it was a second too late. And as soon as his body hit the water he blinked and suddenly he opened his eyes somewhere else.

Everything suddenly was quiet and he felt the warm presence of a body on top of him, the softness of something beneath him. He opened his eyes, moaned out of instinct when he felt a spike of pleasure that spiraled straight through his stomach. Heat and pressure in his cock, heavy breathing against his ear.

He still felt the cold flush of panic along his face but he looked through the corner of his eyes and expected to see that pink-tinted hair. Kisumi. Maybe he really had waken up.

"Ki—" he began, ready to push him off. He just wasn't in the mood—dream or not—when it wasn't Kisumi's face anymore, but Haru's. Haru turned to him with a flushed face and heavy-lidded blue eyes.

Makoto swallowed hard, opened his mouth to say something, but Haru stopped him with a rough kiss. His lips took Makoto's bottom lip between them, sucking before he parted Makoto's lips with a firm flick of his tongue. Makoto couldn't help but sigh against his mouth as Haru pressed him firmly against the softness beneath him—a bed?- and kissed him hard. Makoto kissed back. Something they hadn't yet managed to do in reality. This was only a dream kiss, a dream Haru...how much of this was really Haru? How much of this was reality? How much of this would be remembered...if any...

"Haru..." Makoto said in between kisses. He pushed Haru away and saw the irritated furrow of his brows, the glare Haru gave him. "You were just...are you okay? The stream..." he pressed his hand to Haru's forehead, ran his fingers through his hair. Dry.

Haru pushed away and sat on his knees. Makoto sat up on his elbows and looked around. It was Haru's bedroom back in Iwatobi. Down to the last detail. He swallowed and his head fell back. He breathed, relaxed. He felt a soft wetness against his throat. Haru's soft mouth. He shuddered, feeling a warmness spread to his fingertips.

"We were in your dream," Haru whispered into his ear, his mouth catching the lobe. "Now we're in mine."

"My dream...more like a nightmare. That dream was one of my fears." Haru stopped kissing him, his entire body seemed to stiffen. Makoto looked over and noticed the way Haru looked away, a flush on his cheeks.

"This is one of my mine," Haru said, biting his bottom lip as he looked up at Makoto with a soft flush on his cheeks. The same flush he wore the last moment they'd been together in Iwatobi. Makoto could read Haru like script and it seemed Haru's eyes gave off more than just a shyness. It was shame.

Makoto swallowed, felt the rush of blood high on his cheeks. He allowed Haru to push him back against the bed, straddle him. His fingers trembled as they played with the collar of his shirt.

"You don't have to if your afraid," Makoto said as he placed his hand over Haru's. He smiled, and Haru blushed again, turning away.

"Do you and Kisumi...do this?" He asked and Makoto frowned, squeezing onto Haru's still hand.

"Haru..." He frowned and ran his hand through Haru's hair. He didn't lean into his touch. "I don't want to be with Kisumi. I'm going to end it...whatever it is." He shook his head. Months of memories that Makoto couldn't even remember...months that Kisumi held close. Makoto wondered what had happened in those months that he hadn't really even been there.

Haru blinked, stopped, then leaned forward and pressed his face against Makoto's, nose brushing his cheek. He kissed the corner of his mouth, his breath coming out in hot puffs against his mouth. Makoto bit his bottom lip, his heart pounding as he looked into Haru's dark eyes.

"Really?" Haru asked, and Makoto nodded, not once taking his eyes off of Haru's. Makoto nodded, and Haru cupped his face with his palms and pressed his mouth to Makoto's in a charged kiss, soft lips trailing away from the plush of Makoto's lips to his sharp jaw line, his neck. Wet and warm.

Makoto breathed out, buried his fingers into Haru's hair.

"Come to Iwatobi," he heard Haru say, the voice distorted, farther away, but Makoto was distracted by the wet heat of Haru's lips sucking on the sensitive spot on his neck. "Tell me in person."

"Okay," Makoto said, eyes heavily lidded, lured into the daze of Haru's warm mouth. But the warmth was fading. Steadily streaming away. And the light pressure of Haru's fingertips disappeared from his heated skin.

"Do you think we can go back to the way things were?"

The last words Haru had asked. But when Makoto opened his eyes to answer Haru was gone and Makoto was awake in his bed. He blinked, rubbing at his eyes with his knuckle. His skin was hot, moist. And he looked up as he listened to the soft sounds of Kisumi snoring above him.

He sat up and yawned, getting up to walk to the mini fridge to get a bottle of water and the chill of the water as it his his mouth reminded him of the feeling of freezing, rushing river water. He shook his head, went back to bed with only the faintest remembrance of what it was he'd been dreaming about: Haru, in all the ways Makoto missed him.

–

Makoto wiped the sweat from his brow and watched as Kisumi dribbled the ball. The ball bounced uneasy, violently quick on the concrete below them, and Makoto swallowed the thickness in his throat. There was something on Kisumi's mind, that much he could tell just in the jerking, rough movements he made as they played.

Makoto winced as Kisumi moved to break past him and bumped into his shoulder roughly. Stumbling, he turned to see Kisumi jump and make the two-point shot, a determined grin that hung lopsided on his face. "Got to do better than that Tachibana. Haven't you learned anything?" He caught the ball and passed it to Makoto.

"It's hard to play when something's on your mind. You know that," Makoto said as he dribbled, but didn't make an attempt to start. "We can talk if you want."

"Put it into play," Kisumi said as he wiped at his forehead with his sweatband on his wrist. "Come on. We only have a little bit of time until you leave for Iwatobi."

Makoto blinked and Kisumi took the chance to rush forward, stealing the ball from Makoto in a heartbeat and running towards his hoop. Makoto followed, weakly attempting to block as he asked, "You know? But I haven't told you yet that I-"

Kisumi threw the ball. Another two-pointer for him. He turned to Makoto with a strange look on his face that Makoto wasn't used to seeing. Not when Kisumi was one who was always blushing with a fondness. He was as happy to see and be and breathe in this world as Haru was in water.

"I saw your face light up when Sousuke mentioned Haru was there. I thought maybe you could move on-" he shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I know you miss your friend." Kisumi turned and grabbed the ball, dribbling it then turning to the nearest hoop and shooting.

"We're not done with the game..." Makoto said with a frown, as he watched Kisumi shoot hoops on his own.

"I am," Kisumi said, dribbling the ball for minutes. He seemed to be pensive, mulling something over. But then, so was Makoto.

It was as if the Good Fortunes card in his pocket had a weight, a presence. He could feel it. He swallowed hard, the demon's voice a far away echo in his mind. His words...

"There's only one rule, Makoto Tachibana. And that is that you two stay away from each other. Now now, don't look so sad. If you two were going to be together in the future, why not wish it, eh? So no phone calls, no letters, no seeing each other."

Makoto blinked, the words, the image of the demon dissolving in his memory as he looked at Kisumi standing an arms-length away. Makoto frowned. To have his own future away from Haru. Independence. Had that been what they had needed to breathe life into the claustrophobic tunnel of their friendship? Or was it just for Makoto to chip away at the wall of his own heart: to tell and explain and give Haru everything he really wanted to say.

"I'm sorry, Kisumi," Makoto said as he reached forward and grabbed Kisumi's wrist to make him look at him. Kisumi looked back, surprised, dropping the ball. "I think I made a mistake when we..." he looked away. He hated hurting anyone's feelings. Makoto, for his entire life, had done what he could to avoid it. Those words left unsaid. Maybe Makoto had worried too much about avoiding conflict.

Kisumi shook his head. "I know. I mean, I've known you felt that way."

Makoto scratched the back of his neck. For once, he didn't have the right words.

"Go to Iwatobi. It's been long enough of you and Haru not talking." Kisumi said. He smiled, pulled his wrist out of Makoto's weak grasp and turned away. "Just make sure before you come back that he knows everything. I mean it, Makoto," Kisumi said as he looked at Makoto over his shoulder. "Tell him everything—in words—that I was able to pick up on when you were quiet."