Requested by le car- thank you
Kensei x Mashiro
Jaded
When they arrived in Karakura, he spent a lot of time walking.
He would wander around the town, for whole days at a time, without stopping to eat or drink. He would walk meaninglessly, filled with pain, unable to look his comrades in the eye or stop to calm himself. He would walk until he was unable to go further, and then the next day, aching muscles aside, he would do the same.
He was exhausted with the way things were now. Like a weight on his shoulder, he could not escape the feeling that he failed them all, failed the Soul Society, failed himself. Every time he caught sight of his reflection, in a mirror or glass or the water of a puddle, he felt a deep sense of guilt, and shame, and entirely world-weary.
That was, until, she slapped him across the face.
With an unusual look of seriousness, one that, if he had been paying more attention, he would have realised had become more prominent in the recent weeks.
She stared at him.
"You bastard."
He felt rage swell up inside of him like a coil of heat. He had no idea how she had found him, out here in the streets, or whether she had been following him from the outset, but both thoughts angered him almost as much as the slap.
"What?"
"Stop moping around! We need you here, you know?"
"What good am I to them? I got them into this mess."
"And so did I. But you don't see me being all jaded about it."
He looked away then, anger seeping out of him, leaving him suddenly tired.
"I should have been stronger."
"There was no way for you to have been."
"Still… I should have been."
She pressed her lips to his collar bone, and pressed her body against his. For a moment, he simply stood there.
"Kensei, come home."
He felt his arms move of their own accord, wrapping around her.
"Please."
He sighed, deep and long.
"Fine."
Her eyes, when they looked up at him, were warm with hope, and as she pressed her lips once more to his skin, he wondered if he himself might find a little bit of that hope here, for them, and for the future.