Mikau: Hey guys. Sorry this took so long. I've been too depressed to write lately. Winter really kills me. That being said, this is probably going to be the last chapter for a while until I get out of my funk. I hope to be back in late January/early February, but we'll see. Today we have a lot of updates: Falling in Love Literally's final chapter, The Healing Process, Mausoleum, Just Passing Through, and a new one called Sacrifices. It's a HakuSeraKai piece. Thanks a bunch to all of the reviewers from last chapter: neonquincy1217, Kimmiko T, piggyninja (Most of the music, like Rise Against, is my brother's music, but UVERworld was my favorite band years ago. ^.^), bourbon (Jealous Rei is actually in chapter six, so keep looking forward to it. Sorry for the wait.), EverThePhantom, and q. I really am glad that people are enjoying this.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, there would be an Alice in Wonderland episode. Dream sequences are a little overused, so maybe an Alice-themed murder?
…
Chapter Five: The Ninja and the Ride Home
Amuro had hastily retreated when threatened with the possibility of having to sing some raunchy pop duet with Satoko. He really did need something to drink after singing so many songs back to back with Azusa, so it wasn't like he was totally blowing Satoko off without cause…. When he got back, hopefully no one would ask why he hadn't just drunk any one of the beverages on the table that the group had purchased.
He could always say that he needed some fresh air…when in reality what he truly wanted was some space and some time away from Satoko.
…But what he didn't need at the moment was the silence out in the hall that allowed him to dwell on those duets with Azusa, how it had made him feel, and the little crush for her that he had no business harboring.
…Maybe it would go away if she broke his heart. It wasn't as if Amuro's feelings were requited exactly, so there was a good chance that nothing would come of all this if he could keep himself from acting on his urges. Or maybe he'd slip up and act, and she'd turn him down outright.
Amuro blinked, checking his watch. He'd gotten so caught up in his thoughts that he'd been standing at the fountain letting the water run for five whole minutes straight now.
He needed to get a grip fast.
With a sigh, he headed back to the room, opening the door and stepping in…only to immediately sense a change in the atmosphere among his coworkers.
"Hey guys…what's going on?" Amuro frowned, studying each of their faces—Misa smiled innocently, Kujiro looked sort of vacant, Satoko was all sweet smiles for him, and Azusa…Azusa's face was telling. She blushed, wringing her hands nervously as she smiled meekly and cast her eyes down at the floor.
"Oh, nothing," Misa answered for the group. "Azu-chan, Satoko-chan, and I were just on our way to the ladies room. We have to powder our noses and pick wild flowers and all those other euphemisms. Come on girls!"
Satoko obediently followed Misa out, and Azusa found herself dragged along.
And then it was just Amuro and Kujiro.
"Well," Amuro sighed as he sank back down on the couch to wait for the girls to return.
Kujiro shifted uncomfortably, chewing on the inside of his cheek. He wasn't really good at talking with new people, and even though Amuro and Kujiro had been working together for a while now, they had never really spoken outside of the scope of their employment before, so it was a little awkward to suddenly whip up a conversation.
"Do you like sports?" Kujiro tried for some common ground. Maybe he would get lucky and he and Amuro could talk about basketball.
Amuro cast a sideways glance at his companion, held it for a second, and then faced back front once more. "No. Not really. I'll watch with a group, but…I can't say I have any particular interest personally."
He smiled as he thought back to all of the times he'd been roped into somebody's watch party back in the days of the police academy. He'd been forced to watch soccer, baseball, basketball, and even women's volleyball…especially women's volleyball. Those had been some good times with the guys, but he really hadn't cared much about what was going on on screen. It was more about the atmosphere, the conversations, the food, and being with his friends.
"Oh," Kujiro breathed in a sigh of disappointment. "Well…" he racked his brain for something else they might have in common. "I…I like karate and mixed martial arts and stuff like that. I know that's still kind of a sport, but it's a little different from team sports, so… Do you…? Uh…"
"I practice jujitsu, but I can't say I really have much interest in it," Amuro admitted honestly, throwing the poor guy a bone. "I learned for survival, not really out of any love for martial arts or that whole lifestyle and ideology. Sorry."
Kujiro raised an eyebrow at his coworker. "Dude. Why's a barista gotta know jujitsu for survival? You work in some really rough cafés before Poirot?"
Amuro chuckled softly. "No. You forget that I'm also a private detective. We get in some sticky situations in our line of work."
"Ooooh." Kujiro nodded. "Yeah. I totally forgot. Say, that's really awesome. You're like a crime-fighting ninja or something! …So…Do you solve a lot of murders or…or do you work more on bank robberies or is it more like lost cats and stuff? What's that like?"
"I do a little bit of all of the above, actually." Amuro shrugged.
"Do you like it?" Kujiro urged, actually interested in getting some more details.
Amuro shrugged again. "It depends. I find the work really interesting, but seeing murders day in and day out can wear down on you. It's good to get a lost cat every once in a while. Sometimes it's rough when someone dies and you couldn't prevent it or you fail and people get hurt, but…on the days when you do foil the evil plot and you do get there in time to save a life…when you get to carry a little girl and her puppy out of the rubble of a burning building and hand her over to her mother…it's the best job in the world."
"Dude…" Kujiro breathed, radiating admiration. "You are like, freaking awesome. Man, if I wasn't absolutely positive that my Misa-Misa would never cheat on me, I would be so insecure with you around the café."
Amuro gave an involuntary laugh at this. "Oh, don't worry. I can assure you that I'm not interested in your girlfriend, Kujiro."
The doting boyfriend frowned, ready to be offended at one wrong word from Amuro. "Hey, what's that supposed to mean? My Misa is the ideal woman, I'll have you know."
Amuro raised his hands in a placating gesture. "Easy. I hold your girlfriend in high esteem. She's an excellent woman, but she belongs with you. She's too much woman for me to handle. I'm better off just being friends with her."
This seemed to satisfy Kujiro, and he nodded. It was then that he remembered the task his Misa-Misa had set before him. "Oh! Hey, Amuro…how do you feel about Azusa-chan and Yukimura?"
Amuro blinked, trying to assess where in the world that had come from. "Why do you ask?"
"Misa told me to," Kujiro replied promptly…only to regret it when he remembered that he wasn't supposed to tell Amuro that. "Dammit!" He slapped his palm to his forehead. "She told me not to tell you that she had asked me to."
With a kind smile, Amuro assured, "Don't worry. I won't say anything, but why do you think Misa-san asked you to do that?"
Kujiro shrugged and gave Amuro a quick rundown of what all had happened after he'd stepped out earlier. "Azusa-chan was really cute. She's so nice, and instead of being all mad at Yukimura like I would have been if another guy was movin' in on my Misa-Misa, she seemed like she was more worried about you breaking Yukimura's heart than anything. Azusa-chan's a really great girl, isn't she?"
"Yeah," Amuro agreed a little half-heartedly, more than a bit disappointed that once again Azusa had failed to get jealous over him.
Hadn't their singing together had any effect on her? God, how their voices resonating had made his heart beat. Hadn't she felt anything?
He silently scolded himself for allowing her hold on him to strengthen. He shouldn't be here, shouldn't be letting himself indulge in these feelings for her. He should go home and take a week off from his café duties. He needed to get away from her and go hiking in the mountains or something.
Normally, whenever something sparked a reaction in him, he could urge surf—be present with his emotions, acknowledge what he was feeling for what it was, accept that he was feeling that way, come to terms with it, acknowledge that it was a natural part of the human experience, and then let it go and move on. That was how he had always dealt with loneliness and bouts of lust before, and it had always been effective. He had always been able to put thoughts of a nice pair of legs out of his mind before…with varying levels of difficulty, but he had never lost total control of himself to the point where he was unable to regulate his emotions like what was going on now.
Enomoto Azusa was proving to be his undoing.
And how quickly it was happening. Just the previous week she had been nothing more than a pretty coworker to him. He hadn't felt this undeniable attraction before. He had marked her down as special due to her unparalleled compassion and agreeable nature; he had taken note of her due to her even and ever-cheerful disposition, but he had never seen her as anything more than a coworker he was marginally fond of until that night when he had taken her home and she had begun to shatter all of his preconceptions about her.
Though it was obvious that Azusa found Amuro to be handsome and good-natured and was not opposed to the thought of him as a prospective partner, it was apparent that her heart wasn't really in it like his was. If she could say things like, "Even if Amuro-san doesn't develop feelings for me…" coolly, without much concern about the outcome, she couldn't care much for him, could she?
Why this difference in levels of affection that were sparked at the same time? How could she, a simple and honest young woman prone to enthusiasm and romanticism, have cooler feelings than him, a hardened soldier?
…Maybe because her honest vulnerability had really struck a chord in him when she'd shared with him her love of music, the loss of her parents, and that time of her life that had been ruled by depression. She had opened up and shared, becoming more than just a cute coworker to him. With his new knowledge, he suddenly saw her depth and her charm, her strength and her courage. Getting to know her had made her attractive to him. He hadn't been anywhere near as open with her—nor could he be—and so he had not cemented a place in her heart as she had in his.
"Kujiro," Amuro called softly as he shook himself from his thoughts.
"Hn?" The redhead sat up straighter.
"You can tell Misa-san that Yukimura-san isn't my type, and while Azusa-san is a great girl, I'm not emotionally available right now, so I can only think of her as a friend. Okay?"
The younger man nodded, having no clue as to the significance of the message. The only things Kujiro comprehended about love were the things pertaining to Misa—her favorite flowers, the brand of her perfume, their anniversaries, her ring size, how she liked to be kissed, what restaurants to take her to…. He had no notion of the back and forth game of chess currently being played out in front of him.
It was just a couple of minutes later that the girls came back in, and Kujiro was forced to sing a duet with Misa before the girls started to take turns singing that dreadful pop music again.
They kept at it until midnight—talking and singing and laughing and enjoying the food and drink. Well…three-fifths of them enjoyed the drinking part.
Furuya Rei had long given up drinking. He'd been a sad, irritable drunk, prone to rowdy outbursts that tended to start bar fights and ended in him and his friends getting kicked out. Now Furuya Rei only drank when he was seriously depressed.
Bourbon, on the other hand, was a mild social drinker. He'd nurse the same one or two drinks all evening at "company" events, really just holding the glass and occasionally taking a sip in order to look like he was drinking.
Amuro Toru…he still wasn't sure. This identity was a little weak, not yet fully fleshed out. He'd have to work on the character some more, especially now that it looked like he'd be using it more often outside of work, but, for the moment, he was kind of leaning towards Amuro Toru not being a drinker. Amuro kind of seemed like a tea person to him.
Noticing that Azusa seemed to be sticking to tea as well, he asked, "You not much of a drinker either?"
She smiled and shook her head. "I'll have one from time to time, but I'm such a light-weight, so I really have to be careful about where and when I drink." She snuck a peek at the time. "I'm going to have to leave soon so I don't miss the last train, and I don't want to be out so late by myself drunk," she explained.
"I'll take you home," he offered. And then promptly gave himself a sound mental kick.
Wasn't he supposed to be actively trying to loosen her hold on him? Hadn't he resolved to avoid her? So why was he offering her a second ride home when the first one had caused so much trouble? With his luck, this time she'd tell him about her love for tournament-style fighting anime and classic cars. She'd reveal more of the secrets of her tragic past, and he'd be proposing to her and confessing his own secrets before the month was out.
Thankfully, she refused his offer.
"I couldn't let you drive so far a second time this week for me. Especially not this late at night after you worked today and have been out several hours with us."
"Azusa-san, it would be no trouble," he insisted. And mentally banged his head against the wall.
"If it'd be no trouble…" Satoko gingerly broke in, siting her own intoxicated state and her fear of perverts trying to take advantage of her as a reasonable claim to his services.
Amuro silently cursed, realizing that he was stuck.
Misa more audibly (and drunkenly) expressed Amuro's unstated opinion, but the others kindly pretended not to hear.
Seeing no way out of it, Amuro was about to gladly agree in character—because Amuro Toru was a gentleman no matter what Furuya Rei personally thought of his loose coworker…dammit—when Azusa got the jump on him.
She looked at him with pleading eyes and earnestly asked, "You will take her home, won't you? I'd do it myself, but I'm afraid I wouldn't be much help keeping away the perverts, so… Will you please, Amuro-san?"
There was that crowbar to the gut feeling again. He supposed it would have been too much to ask to have her beg him to refuse because she didn't want that slut alone with him in a sexy car where all manner of crazy things could happen between a man and a woman late at night. There it was: Azusa didn't really care if he got jumped by Yukimura. He was nothing more than a coworker to her. And, God, it sucked…even if it was better for the mission this way.
He smiled amiably, putting on his customer service mask. "Of course. Like I said, it's no trouble. I'd hate for something to happen to one of my cute coworkers."
And that settled it.
…
They parted ways at the train station, Satoko and Amuro heading towards his car while Azusa and Misa (and Kujiro escorting her) made their way towards their respective platforms.
Only, once they were out of sight, Misa reached out and grabbed Azusa by the arm.
"What the hell were you thinking?!" she scolded like a Catholic school nun.
Azusa looked utterly taken aback. "W-What do you mean, Misa-chan?"
"Asking your crush to take the enemy home like that?!" Misa exclaimed, waving her arms wildly, attracting the attention of passersby.
Azusa blushed and lowered her own voice, hoping to set an example for Misa to follow. "She really was drunk, and what with her wearing clothes like that, people might get the wrong impression about her, and she might be bothered by perverts."
Misa did not take a clue from Azusa's soft tone. Instead she snorted loudly, "You mean they might get the right idea about that slut. And I don't think she was really half as drunk as she was pretending to be. Now you've got her riding to her apartment with him! It's the perfect opportunity for her to make a move and snatch him away from you! Did the thought not even occur to you before you practically begged him to take another woman home?! Have you no sense of jealousy?! You do have a crush on this guy, right?!" Still Misa's arms flailed.
Azusa blinked and then laughed as if she found the very idea preposterous. "Misa-chan, there's nothing to be jealous about. Amuro-san is just giving Satoko-chan a ride home. Nothing's going to happen, even if she does try to make a move on him."
Misa stared at her friend in uncomprehending frustration. "How can you have such faith in him?"
Azusa shrugged and smiled cheerfully. "Because I know what kind of man he is. He's a good man and a gentleman. He told me that women like that repulsed him and—" She suddenly broke off with a flaming blush.
Misa, infinitely pleased with this revelation, leaned in closer. "And? And what? What did he say?"
Azusa squirmed, wringing her hands. "He said…that girls like me were his type. Not me in particular, mind you, but…girls like me, so…"
But Misa had ceased to listen after the first sentence. The black-haired beauty was currently doing a rather attention-grabbing victory dance. "Yes!" she cheered. "Ha! I knew it! I knew he was sweet on you and that he'd never be taken in by that hag Satoko! Yes!"
…
Meanwhile, a rather dejected Amuro Toru was leading a not-quite-so-drunk-as-she-was-pretending-to-be Satoko to his car, feeling like he'd been tricked and cheated. He'd wanted to drive Azusa home, but instead he was stuck with Satoko. He supposed that that was his cosmic punishment for losing sight of the mission in favor of his own worldly desires.
He could have no idea that Azusa's lack of jealousy did not reflect a lack of interest in him but rather a sense of trust and a high opinion of his character.
In contrast, Satoko was very aware of what Amuro's own behavior towards her signified.
"You're really nice, you know," she softly broke the silence after they'd been driving for a few minutes. "It's really nice of you to drive me home like this, even though you don't like me."
Amuro gave her a pleasant, appeasing smile as he replied, "Don't be silly, Yukimura-san. Of course I like you; we're all friends, aren't we?"
She grimaced, shifting to sit with one foot up on the seat, her knee hugged to her chest. "Come on," she urged. "You know what I mean. You're not dense, and I've been throwing myself at you pretty hard all night."
His fake grin faded into a neutral, if not somewhat guarded expression.
"I really do like you, you know," she added softly before instructing, "Turn left up here." She sighed, going back to her previous thought. "…I know I've been coming on strong, but I'm not just a slut; I do like you."
He was thoughtful for a moment because there was something more than a manipulative ploy in her words. She did feel something.
Finally he answered, "I'm sorry. Thank you, but I'm not emotionally available right now."
"Because you like Azusa," she easily filled in the blank.
"No," he responded quickly…maybe a little too quickly to be convincing. "It's not that. I can only see Azusa-san as a friend at the moment. I'm just not…emotionally available."
It sounded like a weak excuse even to his own ears.
"Ex-girlfriend?" Satoko persisted.
Not being emotionally available had been a vague, cover-all excuse, but when she pressed him like that, he realized that there was more truth in it than he'd originally believed.
Akemi's face came to his mind, and he sighed, "Not even. She was never 'mine'."
Satoko nodded as if she understood all too well. "Unrequited love."
Amuro gave a sarcastic laugh and mumbled, "Sure. Let's just go with that."
"But what kind of girl could resist a Prince Charming like you?" Satoko wondered in disbelief.
He wanted to answer: The kind that fell for a lying, conniving, vile man that had manipulated her, played with her feelings, and used her for the sake of furthering his own goals.
It made Rei sick because he had done the same kind of thing many times while gathering intel for his own work. The thought that they weren't quite so different as he'd like to believe nauseated him.
The big difference was that Akai had done it to Akemi, and that was unforgiveable. Especially since Rei genuinely loved the woman that Akai had seduced merely to get a leg up in his work.
"I don't want to talk about it," Amuro finally replied with a sigh of exhaustion.
"…Okay," Satoko relented a little reluctantly. "…But just so you know, I'm not going to give up on you," she vowed.
Amuro resisted the urge to bang his head against the steering wheel. He did, however, manage to respond in a disinterested yet cordial tone. "You're free to do as you like."
They thankfully arrived at her apartment not ten minutes later, and he was free of her…but not before she invited him inside.
"Are you sure you won't come in and let me warm you up a bit before you head off?" she asked a second time after he politely refused.
She made sure to squeeze her arms together so that her chest was propped up and seemingly bigger. This was accompanied by a coy move that effectively made her shirt slip a bit, revealing a hint of her bra.
Amuro tried not to show his disgust as, this time, he looked her straight in the eye and firmly insisted, "Yukimura-san, you're an attractive woman, but I'm not in the habit of 'warming myself up' with anyone I'm not desperately serious about. Good night."
"…Good night, Toru-san," she replied gracefully with a smile and a polite bow. She didn't let the string of obscenities leave her lips until her apartment door was securely shut behind her and he had already driven a block away.
…
Mikau: Well, I think this chapter was okay. Next chapter is jealous Amu-chan and guest appearances by Kaito and Conan, so look forward to that. I'll see you guys when I see you. Take care!