Chapter 30: Stop flaming the story, okay, you don't know what's even gonna happen, okay! So FUCK YOU! if you flame, you will be a prep, so all flamers can kiss my ass! Sorry for saying Alzheimer's is dangerous, but that's the Ministry's opinion, 'cause society basically sucks. Fangs to Raven! You rock, bitch!
"No!" we screamed sadly. Snap started laughing meanly. He took out a camera evilly. Then… he came towards Draco! He took some stones out of his pocket. He put the stones around Draco and lit a candle.
"What the fuck are you doing?" I shouted angrily. Snape laughed meanly. He pulled down his pants.
I gasped- there was a Dark Mark on his you-know-what! He waved his wand and a knife came. He gave the knife to me. "You must stab Vampire," he said to me. "If you don't, then I'll rape Draco!"
"No, you fucking bastard!" I yelled. Then Draco looked at me sadly with his evil goffik red eyes dat looked so depressant and sexy. He looked exactly like a pentagram (lol geddit 'cause I'm a Satanist) between Kurt Cobain and Gerard. But then I looked at Vampire and he looked so sexy too, with his goffik black hair.
I thought of the time when we screwed, and the time I did it with Draco and Dumbledore came, and the time where Draco almost committed suicide and Vampire was so...
Snape laughed meanly. He started to pray to Voldemort. He started to do an incantation, dancing around the stones whipping Draco and Vampire. Suddenly I had an idea. I closed my eyes, and using my vampire powers, I sent a telepathic massage to Draco and Vampire so they would distract Snape.
"Dumbledore will get you!" Draco shouted.
"Yeah! Just wait until the Ministry finds out!" Vampire yelled. Meanwhile, I took out my wand.
"You ridiculous dunderhead!" Snape yelled. He took off all of Draco's clothes. Just as he was about to rape him…
"Crucio!" I shouted, pointing my wand.
Snape screamed, and started running around the room screaming. Meanwhile, I grabbed my black mobile and sent a text to Sirius. I stopped doing Crucio.
"You dunderhead! I'm going to kill-" shouted Snape, but suddenly Sirius put the whip behind his back. "Oh hello, I was just teaching them something," he lied. But suddenly Lucius and Professor Trelawney came into the room, and they and Sirius unlocked the chains and put them around Snape. Then Professor Trelawney said, "Come on, Ebony, let's go."
Editor's note: This is starting to sound like a really bizarre soap opera. And now for some good news: We've hit the big three oh! My Immortal For Dummies is fast approaching its close...