Chapter 32: I said stop flaming! I know his name isn't Tom Bombodil! That was a mistake! If you don't like the story, then you can go screw yourself! YOU SUCK!
"Hi," I said, flirtly. "I'm Ebony Way, the new student." I shook my pale hand (with black nail polish) with him.
"The name's Tom," he said. "But you can call me Satan. That's my middle name."
We shook hands. "Well, come on, we have to go upstairs," Satan said. I followed him.
"Hey Satan… do you happen to be a fan of Green Day?" (since MCR and Evanesance don't exist yet) I asked.
"Oh my fucking God, how did you know?" Satan gasped. "Actually, I like GC a lot, too."(geddit, 'cause GC did that song 'I Just Wanna Live' that sounded really 80s)
"OMG! Me too!" I replied happily.
"Guess what! They're having a concert in Hogsment," Satan whispered.
"Hogsment?" I asked.
"Yeah. That's what they used to call it in these time before it became Hogsmeade in 2000," he told me, all secretive. "and there's a really cool shop called Hot-"
"Topic!" I finished, happily. Satan frowned, confused.
"No, it's called Hot Issue." He smiled again. "Then in 1998, They changed it to Hot Topic," he moaned.
"Ohh." Now everything was making sense for me. "So is Dumbledore your headmaster?" I shouted.
"Uh-huh." he looked at his black nails. "I'm in Slytherin."
"OMFG! ME TOO!" I shrieked.
"You go to this skull?"(geddit 'cause I'm goffik) He asked.
"Yeah. That's why I'm here. I'm NEW." I smiled.
Dumbledore flew in on his broomstick and started shouting at us angrily. "NO TALKING IN THE HALLS!" he had short blonde hair and was wearing a polo shirt from American Eagle Outfitters.
Editor's note: Green Day formed in the late 80s. They hardly count. And 'I Just Wanna Live'... not really. And I don't know how she could not know bands from the 80s: AC/DC, Dio, Bon Jovi, Poison, Judas Priest, Black Sabbath, KISS, Motley Crue, Quiet Riot, U2, Whitesnake… yeah, I think you get it. She should at least have heard of KISS.