Chapter 17

I was sitting in the bathtub having my own little pity party. What the hell was wrong with me? Why did I tell the Joker that story? I wasn't supposed to tell anyone that story! What made me think for one second that the clown would keep a confidence? I was only two sessions deep and already I had made some stupid calls. I kept telling myself it was because I knew that without a little give and take I wasn't going to be able to get anywhere with him but come on, Harl! You told him you helped your boyfriend commit assisted suicide. Which happened to be highly illegal in New Jersey. I could lose my medical license, worse yet I could be incarcerated for the rest of my life. Stupid, stupid Harley! You just gave him something huge to hang over your head, what if he uses it to threaten you with, he'd been known to do that with other doctors in the past. I felt sick.

Being that there was nothing I could really do about it at that point I decided to move my mental train of thought down the track to something else. Isley. I had an idea that might get her to loosen up a little, but it would require a trip to the Garden Supply Center in the morning. I got out of the bath, pulled on my bathrobe and walked into my bedroom. I rummaged in my drawers until I found a comfy set of cotton My Little Pony pajamas in a pale pink. Rainbow Dash was smiling on the front of the shirt and it made me giggle. I guess a part of me will never grow up.

I went to the kitchen and poured myself some coffee. I sat down on my couch and picked up the copy of Alice in Wonderland I borrowed from the library earlier that day. If I was going to make any sense out of Tetch I needed to brush up on my Lewis Carroll. I got a few chapters in before my mind drifted off. I kept thinking about the Joker. It was so strange seeing him in a weakened state like that. I knew I should have just shipped him down to Ben in the infirmary but I wanted to take care of him. Why was that? True he was charming and funny but he was also a psychopathic mass murderer and dangerous. And powerful. I couldn't deny that. The other inmates were as afraid of him as the staff was. That was a heady combination. He was so complex, I had barely begun to scratch the surface and I was dying to know more. I tried to put him out of my head and focused on my book. At some point I dozed off because I woke up the next morning on the couch with the book lying on my belly.

I got ready for work then headed over to the Gotham Lawn and Garden supply store. I walked to the back of the store and went into the greenhouse. I grabbed a cart and walked the aisles marveling at all the different flowers and plants. I filled the cart with easy to care for plants, I didn't exactly have a green thumb, then purchased a watering can and some plant food. I didn't know how expensive this kind of stuff was and realized I would be eating ramen again for the next few weeks since rent was due. I loaded my purchases into the trunk, except for a fichus tree that I had to stick on the floor of my backseat.

When I got to the asylum I grabbed a couple of orderlies to help me schlep all the greenery into my office. Now you're probably going to laugh, but I spent the next several hours talking to the plants. Yep you heard me, I talked to the plants. I told them all about myself, I talked to them about how much I admired Pam for her crusade to protect plant life, I told them some jokes, and I read them Alice in Wonderland. (May as well kill two birds with one stone) I watered them and fed them and even played them classical music. My office looked like a jungle. I had to giggle to think what anyone would say if they walked in and saw me just then, having a philosophical discussion with a barrel cactus. Again I will stress, my methods were unconventional. I did actually get interrupted, but lucky for me whoever it was had enough courtesy to knock. I opened the door to see Ben standing there.

"Whaddya want?" I said with my nose slightly upturned.

I was still pissed at him, and I still had a bruise from where he dug his thumb into my arm on New Year's Eve. He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand and wouldn't meet my gaze.

"I wanted to let you know we'll be removing your patient's cast today." I was shocked, he had only been brought in at the beginning of December.

"Isn't it too soon, it's only been a month?"

"He heals fast. I mean he's not a meta-human or anything but it looks like his accident gave him some kind of accelerated healing." He finally looked up and met my eyes. "I also wanted to tell you, I'm sorry. I tried calling." I really didn't care if he was sorry. Any affection I felt for him went out the window the night of the gala.

"Okay, you're sorry, great. That fixes everything. So, you've apologized, you can go now. I have things to do." I went to close my door but he placed his palm on it before it could shut.

"Harley, please don't be like this. I was a jerk, I know. I had no right to try and tell you what to do but I still have feelings for you and I was hoping you'd give me a second chance." I put my hands on my hips and looked him directly in the eye.

"Look Ben, I just have to be honest. I'm working on the biggest case anyone could hope to land and I really don't need any distractions. You can be a nice guy, when you're not being overbearing and judgmental, but I just don't have time for a relationship and quite frankly I just don't feel the same way about you as you do about me. Now if you'll excuse me I have work to do." I slammed my door right is his face. Damn, that felt good! I turned to the plants.

"Make sure you tell Pammy about that."

I worked with the plants for most of the day but decided I should go to the infirmary with my patient when he went to have his cast removed. After the exchange this morning I wasn't confident Ben wouldn't try to man-handle my patient out of jealousy. I walked down to I.T. and headed down the hallway to the Joker's cell. He had the top of his jumpsuit rolled down around his waist and was doing one handed push-ups with his good arm. I had never seen him like this before. He was skinny, sure but he was also very muscular, which was something you couldn't tell though the baggy Arkham jumpsuits. His arms weren't huge but you could clearly see the definition as he raised and lowered himself. His back and shoulders were covered in scars, some old and faded, others newer and slightly pink in color. There was sweat dripping from his forehead. He must have noticed I was there because he stopped his exercise and stood to face me. His sweaty chest was firm and hairless and I noticed his nipples were the same white as the rest of him. His abs were unreal, he had a well-defined six pack and those sexy creases that ran towards his pelvis. His jumpsuit was hanging off of his slim hips and I noticed he had a tiny little happy trail of green hair that ran down towards his crotch. I don't know why I didn't already assume that the hair on his body was just as green as the hair on his head. I realized my mouth was hanging open and closed it quickly. He smiled as he ran his fingers through his damp hair which just accentuated his musculature even more.

"What's up, Doc?" I must have had a little color in my cheeks because he was leering at me again in that almost predatory kind of way.

"I-I'm sorry to interrupt you Mr. J." I stammered. I looked down at the ground, it was all I could do to keep myself from ogling him. "I just came to take you down to the infirmary. Your cast is coming off today."

"Oh joy! I guess we get to see your little boyfriend then, hmmm?" I stepped closer to the glass and lowered my voice to a whisper.

"He's not my boyfriend! He's actually a big, fat jerk! I haven't even been on a real date in three years!" Why did I just say that? My love life was none of his business.

"Harleen!" Sneered a familiar voice. I turned around to see Jonathan Crane looking both annoyed and concerned.

"Yes, Dr. Crane?" He pointed at the Joker.

"You need to stay away from that clown! He's dangerous and he will be your downfall!" Joker screwed up his face and shouted.

"Shut it Crane before I shut it for you! Harley is my doctor, not yours!" Jonathan's blue eyes met mine.

"Oh dear child, drop this case and run! Run as fast as you can. He'll twist you, he'll destroy you! Get as far away from him as possible!" I knew Joker and Jonathan had a bit of a rivalry going, although Joker had a rivalry with pretty much all of the rogues.

"Dr. Crane, while I appreciate your concern I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself, thanks. I'm not dropping this case." He had a rueful expression.

"Then I fear dear child that you'll be joining us soon. Think on it and take my advice or you will rue the day you met him!" Joker was fuming.

"When I get out of this cell I'm going to cut that wagging tongue out of your head Crane!" I had to diffuse the situation somehow.

"Mr. J leave it alone, I have no intention of dropping your case. Dr. Crane was a mentor of mine in college, I don't blame him for his concern and neither should you. Now can you please calm down for my sake? The orderlies will be here in a moment and if you're in a tizz we're going to have to wait until tomorrow to remove the cast." The Joker looked at me and gave me a dazzling smile.

"Of course, Doc. Anything for my favorite girl!" I blushed. Damn I needed to get a grip on that. He just made me feel like a schoolgirl sometimes. The orderlies arrived and helped me escort the Joker to the infirmary.

Ben was there when we arrived. I wouldn't even meet his eyes and I guess he got the message because he didn't address me. He looked awfully sulky though. The orderlies cuffed Joker by one arm and both ankles while Ben gathered up the cast saw and began the procedure. I casually flipped through an old issue of Cosmo that was sitting on a side table as Ben worked. Joker looked at him smugly.

"So Doc Stone, you look a little down. Girl problems?" Wisely Ben kept his big mouth shut. "I heard you took our dear little Harley to a ball, but much like Cinderella she ran out on you at midnight." I looked up from my reading.

"Mr. J, that's enough!" He smirked at Ben.

"Oh I don't think it is. I noticed a bruise on her arm Doc, a bruise that was the exact same size as your fat little sausages, Stone." Ben had just finished sawing the cast and set the saw down on a tray as he peeled off the fiberglass. He wouldn't meet the Jokers gaze. He was just trying to get done as quickly as possible. "Can I just tell you how much I hate people touching my stuff?" Joker's arm was now free of the cast and quick as lightening he grabbed the cast saw, flicked the switch and shoved it into Ben's throat. "Never rub another man's rhubarb, Doc!"

Blood sprayed out all over the Joker and I screamed at the top of my lungs. I didn't need to activate my panic button, three orderlies burst through the door immediately. Joker was howling and cackling, blood dripping down his face. He looked at me.

"Sorry Doc, I just don't like to share! Hahahahaha!" I just stood there unable to move as security ran into the room and subdued the Joker. They weren't gentle and I didn't stop them. Ben may have been a jerk but I didn't want him dead. Security dragged Joker out of the infirmary, presumably to put him back in solitary confinement as the orderlies tried in vain to save Ben's life, but it was no use. Joker went for the Jugular and Ben bled out before anything could be done. I leaned against the nearest wall and slid down to the floor as I sobbed.

Joan and Dr. Arkham burst into the room and saw me there. Joan knelt down next to me.

"Harley, what the hell happened?" I looked up at her dazedly through my tears.

"Joker. Ben was careless, left the cast saw within Joker's reach. He grabbed it, and, and….." I started sobbing again. Joan wrapped her arms around me.

"It's okay Harleen, you're safe now." Arkham walked over and looked down at me sternly.

"Why did he do it? What did he say before he killed Dr. Stone?" I looked up at him. I don't know why I did it, but I lied.

"Nothing. They didn't say anything. I was flipping through a magazine waiting for Ben to finish up with my patient, then I heard the saw turn on and heard Ben yelp. Then Joker started to laugh. I guess he thought it was a good gag." Arkham shook his head.

"Very well. It's not the first time Joker killed someone unprovoked. Dr. Quinzel, take the rest of the day off, you don't need to be seeing patients in your state." I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Yes Dr. Arkham."