The next morning, mom and dad waste no time in waking Dizzy and I at the ass-crack of dawn. Needless to say, the task isn't easy. Although I comply without complaint, my sister-by-name complains and groans through the entire process. Although, it is rather funny.

"No! No!"

Dizzy yells, rolling over onto her other side as if it has any effect on our father, who stands over her poking her with the butt-end of his shotgun.

"Dizzy, no games. It is time to rise."

"Fuck your games I'm sleeping!"

Mom laughs at this, as she stands next to me watching them bicker. Mornings, even in the Capital Wasteland, aren't too different from the ones at home. Usually mom and dad are up and about, and I wake with them, while Dizzy sleeps half the day away. I find it's especially hard to wake her if she's dreaming about food.

"She's a lot like me."

Mom says as she lights a smoke, while Dizzy curls into a tight ball to avoid further prodding.

"Oh, yeah?"

I ask, even though I know the truth. Mom nods, blowing out smoke from her mouth.

"Yup. Dizzy took my personality and got it down to a science. She's a lot like your father though, too. At least, she seems to be."

"What makes you say that?"

"Her fight. She has a fight in her, that I've never been able to find in myself."

I look at Dizzy on the ground whining and begging for more sleep, and wonder if my mother has truly lost her mind.

"You sure about that, mom?"

"Positive. But you know, you turned out a lot more like your father."

"Yeah, so I'm told."

"And I trust, that when your father and I leave you two out here again, you'll keep your sister safe."

I want to say something to her. I want to tell her she's right. But instead, as Dizzy finally stands and glares angrily at dad, I keep my mouth shut. Mom goes over to my father, and takes his hand in hers. He doesn't avert his eyes from Dizzy, but I see him slightly squeeze her hand. Finally, Dizzy sighs, and folds her arms across her chest.

"Why so early? It's too early. The sun isn't even awake yet. Mom can you be on my side on this?"

"Afraid not, Dizzy. Early mornings out here are a norm. Last thing you want is a Raider or other baddie coming by and taking advantage of you in your sleep."

Dizzy groans in defeat and slaps her hands against her thighs. Without anymore argument, mom and dad begin to lead the way towards the Citadel Ruins. Dizzy doesn't follow right away, and neither do I. Instead, I walk over to her, and silently we watch the figures of our parents begin along the trail they've walked so many times before us. Yet, while she looks at the, I look at her. There's so many things, I want to tell her. So many things, I want to make her listen to. No woman, can make me feel so confident, and so insecure, by just being in their presence, as Dizzy can. Licking my lips slightly, I realize, I can taste just faintly, what I can never have. I can never, in my life, have Dizzy. We agreed on that, nights before. But, I can still dream, and I can in some ways, hope.

"We should get going."

Dizzy says, snapping me from my own mind. I nod, as her eyes meet mine.

"Yeah, come on."

She takes the lead, while I trail behind her, watching her. Against the frontier, her form, and my mother's, are exactly the same. Although Dizzy has the appearance and face of a perfect mixture of both mother and father, I see this whimsical glint in her eye. One, that although I don't see in my mother's, I know is there. But, for my mother, that glint was before my time. Before Dizzy. In a world, that we still don't understand. To know what my mother was like back then…to truly know, I think I'd give anything. Because if I knew what my mother was like, I know, I could handle Dizzy. I could handle whatever she throws, whatever she does. But all I know is the stories, and verbal communication, only says so much. Stories and events, are so much more fruitful, when you can see, hear, taste, and smell them.

"Mom?"

I call, catching my balance as we walk up a small hill. Dizzy walks in the middle, ahead of me, behind our parents. The four of us stop walking, and everyone looks at me.

"What is it? Cain?"

Her voice has the hint of a mother's worry. What I wouldn't give, to hear her voice as it was, so many years ago, when this world was as new to her as it is to me. Maybe then, I'd have a better understanding, of how to read my sister. Maybe I should stop calling her that. In due time, I guess.

"Mom, can I…can I talk to you?"

Mom looks at dad, and gives him a nod and a pat on the arm. Dizzy jogs ahead, and jumps on our father's back. You know, they need time, too. Dizzy and dad get along so well it's almost…weird. My father, as unemotional as he is, really lights up around her. Mostly due to the fact that Dizzy is his little girl, and despite how old she gets, he'll always see her as a child. When mom reaches me, she has the look of a concerned parent in her eyes. The only kind of look, a mother can give to their child. It breaks my heart.

"What is it, Cain? Sweetheart, is something wrong?"

The difference between my mother and father and how they treat me is simple. My father talks to me like a man, while my mother always will talk to me like a child. Not in a condescending way, no, but in a nurturing way. As if I need to be reminded constantly, she is my mother, and will provide me with anything.

"No, no nothing is wrong, mom. I just want to know something."

"What is it?"

We're all walking again, and Dizzy and dad are up ahead, chatting and arguing playfully.

"What were you like before? I mean, when you were Dizzy's age?"

"You know how I was."

"No, mom, how were you? Like, really?"

She looks at me, with those dark, deep eyes. They hide so many secrets, and tell so many memories. I know there's things about my parents that they don't tell me. It's understandable. But, the mystery is what intrigues me.

"…I was a scared, insecure, selfish, and sad little girl inside."

"Mom?"

"When I met your father, I was two or three months fresh from the vault. I had lost my father in the Wasteland, and had no companions. I never did. I was completely and utterly alone and yet…I never felt lonely."

"You didn't?"

"No. Not until…"

"Until what, mom? Are you okay?"

She nods her head, as tears form in her eyes while she looks at the darkened silhouette of her lover in the rising sun.

"Until I spent time away from your father. Until…I understood, the reason behind why people did things that before, I saw stupid and unnecessary. I never…told your father this, and I hope you won't, either."

"What is it?"

"At the age of nineteen, your father's mere presence in my life, helped me understand why my own father couldn't ever love me, like I wanted him to love me."

"Why?"

"Because he loved my mother, and missed her, that it was his mission to her…to finish Project Purity. But before your father, I never knew such a love existed."

I look down at my feet, as my mother holds my hand. Her fingers remind me of Dizzy, as she squeezes mine.

"Dizzy, is exactly the same way. She's lonely, Cain. She's lonely, and it's the kind of loneliness that no amount of love or care from me or your father can cure."

"…Yeah…I figured that."

"I hope…I hope in your time out here, you can do something about that."

"Mom?"

Our eyes meet, and I see that her tears clean the face that dust dirtied. Beneath the clear rivers, are faint freckles. Ones, that my father would often kiss when I would spy on them on moments alone when I was younger.

"She doesn't know, the depth of her loneliness, or how badly it can destroy her. You, are the closest friend she has."

"…I suppose."

"No Cain, you are. She cares for you, albeit she doesn't show it worth a damn."

"Did you ever, you know, fight with dad back then?"

"Oh yeah, all the time. Always. We were pushing one another's buttons to no end, and the two of us detested one another."

"So…how'd you become so close?"

"Because the both of us, really needed a friend."

"But I don't need a friend."

My mother smirks as she drops my hand. Wiping her face, she keeps the sarcastic look.

"Imagine this for me, will you?"

"Alright, mom, what?"

"Imagine, her alone. In danger. Imagine her injured, with no one, at the mercy of whatever enemies you may encounter. Cain, what do you feel?"

I take a moment and picture it. I remember the night in the tunnels, when the Raiders cornered her, me, and took her. Anger, and pain, worry and a power I'm too scared to recognize flows through my veins. Looking back down at my mom, I clench my jaw tightly.

"Angry, enraged, and…"

"And you never want to see her in pain, you never want to see her lonely, you never…want her to be without you."

As if I'm being shamed, I hang my head and let my hair fall over my eyes. As strong as I may look on the outside, I'm truly nothing but soft on the inside.

"…Yeah…how'd you know?"

"I can tell. It's hard, to not see it."

"See what?"

"Your father, inside of you. And it's hard, to not see myself in Dizzy, or her father for that. Especially when she's angry. But, I know because of that, everything will be alright."

"Mom?"

She smiles at me, and it's one of those wise ones. One that tells me, I won't quite understand just yet, even if I do think I'm an adult. Truly, I'm just as naïve as Dizzy.

"In due time, Cain, you'll see. And you'll see just fine."

Mother leaves no room for me to reply. Instead, she runs ahead, and wraps her arms around my father's waist. Dizzy sees this as funny, as she stops walking and watches. But, she can't see, what I see. I see the wet eyes, my mother hides in my father's back. The face of a woman, who truly loves the man in her arms. Who wouldn't, in a million years, trade him for all the treasures someone could offer. I watch, still and calm, as my father turns around and looks at her. He places a hand on top of her hair, and she lifts her head.

They look like children. Children who just discovered love for the first time. Innocent, carefree, and so involved with one another, the whole world is oblivious to them. To them, the other is simply perfect. It warms my heart, in a way not even the desert sun can.

"They're acting like fools."

Dizzy says, as she falls back to me and we continue to walk. My mother's words ring true, as I stare at them. I don't want to look away, as my father holds her close with their steps and pace matching. One day, I want to be half the man my father is. I think, then I would be happy.

"They're in love."

She lights a cigarette as I look down at her. She has our mother's uncaring expressions. She doesn't have her freckles.

"Cain, you're hopeless."

"What're you doing, Diz?"

"What?"

I stare down at her, as she turns her head to face me. Her short, dark hair frames her face perfectly. As if it was simply made to fit her. As if, she was born that way.

"After this is said and done, where in this world are you going?"

She hadn't thought about that. Hadn't thought about what may lie ahead of her, or ahead of us. Instead, as always, she's stuck in a preverbal time-warp. A moment that doesn't last, but doesn't end, either. A foolishness I wish I could have. The corners of her mouth twitch, as if she wants to frown. Instead she scratches the side of her dirty face, and shrugs her shoulders.

"Anywhere, I guess. I hadn't thought much of it."

"Mom and dad are going back home. You won't be okay on your own."

"Sure I will!"

"Dizzy…"

We let our parents drift away. We let the world around us, take a backseat to our lives. In stillness, Dizzy and I look at one another. She doesn't believe her own words, and she knows I don't, either. She knows, the mistakes she'll make, and knows very well that if she was left alone, she'd die. She's not ready, to do what mom did, and survive on just the land and what she can kill.

"…You said, that…"

"Whatever I said, Dizzy, doesn't matter."

She thinks, that on our return to Megaton, I had hinted that we couldn't travel together. At least, that's what I suspect.

"Cain, you're stupid. Come on."

She starts to walk, and I don't stop her. I take pace, right behind her. Our parents aren't too far ahead, but truthfully, it isn't them I'm watching. As Dizzy walks, every few steps, she'll glance back at me. It's a swift look, and I can tell she hopes I don't notice, but I do. I notice. And I notice, that she's looking, to make sure I'm following. I'll always follow her.