Musaki and Ichi bonding about memories and what Musaki hears from Ichi is quite surprising.

Chapter 8: Forgotten Memories

As the next day starts to end, I was walking towards my room until I saw Ichi began to come out of the bathroom and made his way outside and I was curious to know what he's doing. I slowly followed him and then as I came out, I didn't see him anywhere.

Not long after that, I looked up and there he was, sitting on the roof of the orphanage...the one place where I never thought I would find him at. I let out a relieved sigh and proceeded to climb in there to join him.

But then...my eyes were looking on the horizon and I saw how the sky looked like when the sun goes down. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life and I imagine if this is what Ichi does every sunset.

"This is beautiful." I said, in awe.

"Sometimes I come here every night...even when it's much darker." Ichi said.

"All by yourself?"

Ichi nodded his head and told me, "It's much easier for me."

I wanted to at least get to know each other a little more and share a little bit about our parents. I know Ichi keeps guarding himself about this because it doesn't mask away the fact that he killed them when he was four, but I was hoping to see what his life was before that happened. I asked, "Hey, Ich...before your parents were...gone, what were they like when they were alive?"

Ichi was trying to find some memories about it and then...nothing came out. He lets out a big sigh and answered, "I don't remember..."

It shocked to me to the core to know that Ichi doesn't remember anything from his life and I asked, "Nothing at all?"

"No."

"Not even a little?"

"No. The only memory I have of my parents was killing them." he said, sadly.

"Well, you don't remember the kinds of friends you had, the family you have, your favorite day?"

Ichi shrugged at my questions and said, "I-I don't think I have those memories. Is that...a bad thing?"

I closed my eyes for a sec and opened them again and said, "No...it's just really sad."

Maybe I shouldn't have asked him those questions and that I could've changed the subject to watching the sunset, but I can tell the look on Ichi's face was not only depressing, but sorta puzzling. There was a bit of silence coming in and I said, "I'm curious to know why you never remember anything."

"When you kill your own parents and live with it for the rest of your life, nothing else really matters anymore so you just forget." Ichi replied.

I'm kinda the same way, but much different. Although I have a certain fear about what my life would be like if I actually forgot about my parents and I said, "Sometimes I'm scared that I might forget someday."

"Forget what?"

"My own parents. If I have a new family, it would actually mean that I would forget everything about them and who they are, what they look like. That's the one thing I'm afraid of...so I always tend to hide myself away from any new family that wants to adopt me." I answered.

Ichi looked at me in the eyes and he could understand my feelings and my fears that I mentioned to him and it's like he could easily relate to what I'm going through and told me, "I always felt that way too. The only thing I'm afraid of is killing another family that takes me in. I wouldn't blame them if they wouldn't accept a monster like me."

"Ich?"

"Yeah?"

"If my parents were ghosts, would they forget about me?"

I was anxious to hear Ichi's response and he told me, "No, I'm sure they'd never forget you. Wish I could say the same for me...they wouldn't forget me but they'll never forgive me for what I've did to them...nor would I forgive myself for it."

"Well...at least we have each other." I said.

Ichi looks up at me and said, "That's true. So, why did you want to join me?"

"Wherever you go...I go."

That meaning definitely meant a lot to Ichi and it meant a lot to me too because our friendship made us grow stronger than anything and he said, "Right back at ya."

And that mantra would stick forever. Stick around for more!