When I wake up the next morning, I have a pounding headache. Nauseous, dizzy, I open my eyes. The sunlight burns them, as I clench them closed again. Memories of last night fall blank, as I try to remember what happened.

"Dizzy?"

I call, my voice hoarse. She doesn't respond, so without opening my eyes, I reach over for her. She isn't there.

"Dizzy?"

I say again, sitting up a bit too fast. I feel sicker than I thought I would. Opening my eyes, I see the bathroom door is open, and Dizzy isn't in there nor beside me. Her clothes are gone, her gun is gone. She left it on the small table before I went out last night. Out. I went out. Where did I go? With Maria, to the bar. But, what happened?

I try to remember, as I search for my boots on the floor. The room spins, and sharp pains shoot through my stomach. It's an empty feeling of nausea. Finding something to puke in would be useless, because there's nothing inside of me.

Grabbing my gun and putting my jacket on, I force my body to move even though it doesn't want to. There's something else missing, and I can feel it. It isn't just Dizzy, or food. I use to feel this way the mornings when Dizzy didn't return home, too. Just not as bad, but the alcohol of last night probably made it worse.

"Dizzy?"

I call down the hall as I open the door. There's a few people around, but no Dizzy. Maybe she went to see Wernher? Figuring that to be the most probable suggestion, I head to where he lives. Knocking on his door rattles my brain. It hurts to even think at this point. Now I understand why dad didn't ever drink. It horribly impairs you, and he'd be useless the morning after. I'm sure his employers wouldn't like that too much. I don't know how anyone, can do this all the time. It hurts.

Wernher finally opens his door, and smirks while he looks at me.

"Had a good night? Maria's still in bed."

Actually, I can't much remember last night right now. It's a bit too hurtful to do so, and I'm already in enough pain from this hangover. I don't tell him that though. I just think it.

"Is Dizzy here? She wasn't in the room when I woke up."

Wernher shakes his head, staring at me like he's analyzing something.

"No, she isn't here. But, you look a bit worse for wear. Is everything alright? You seem sicker than just a hangover."

"I'm fine. Really. But, Dizzy isn't here? Do you know where she went?"

"Not to my knowledge. Maybe she went back home?"

"Dizzy doesn't…"

Before I finish the sentence, I remember a snippet of last night. Dizzy and I got into some sort of argument. She has a nasty habit of taking off when you least expect her to. Usually after arguments.

"What is it?"

Wernher asks me, and I shake my head.

"I think you're right. Thanks for the help. I should be heading back."

I try to keep calm and make sure Wernher doesn't suspect anything. I simply just don't trust people, and I have no idea why. My father always taught me to be wry, and although Wernher was kind and admires my mom, I still don't know him very well. And mom's had admirers backstab her plenty of times. I'm sure they're good people though.

"Anytime. See you around, kid. Be safe."

I wave at him, as I walk away. My head pounds and thuds and with each pulsate makes everything blurry. I don't know how I'm going to make it all the way home feeling this way, but I have to give it a shot. Dizzy wouldn't run anywhere else, and something in my gut tells me the Capital Wasteland is exactly where she is. If not, then where she's heading. It's…almost like I can see it. Mentally, I mean. I can see the images of her on the trolly back, almost, and make out the faint light of the ending tunnel, with the Capital Wasteland just beyond that.

It's strange. This whole thing is strange. Everything is, really. Our relationship, the powerful and overprotective feeling I get regularly for her, the…sensing where she is, when I don't even know where to begin looking. I feel like I have to be near Dizzy. Like some celestial being created me just for her.

I am a creation, though. I am a creation not of two people loving one another enough to prove their love, but a creation of a few mad scientists in hope to redefine warfare and personal security. I don't feel like an android, although I'm not sure how androids are supposed to feel, exactly. I suppose I feel like a regular person, even though I don't know how they feel, either. I just feel like myself, I guess you could say. I don't tick like a terminal, or whir and beep like mom's Pip-Boy. I breathe, talk, and sigh light every other human being. But I'm not human. Fuck how long is this going to last?

I get to the tunnel, and discover the trolly is gone. Great. Well, at least I know where Dizzy went. I look behind me, over the bridge, and see people of The Pitt staring at me. They've made their own happiness here. I envy them, as I turn my back on them. I envy, that they can live in peace, in harmony, and do whatever it is they please. The Capital Wasteland, isn't much different. But for people like Dizzy and I, it is. It's a very different world, when you love someone you were never meant to love in the first place. When you're one of those people. Like me.

Walking down the dark tunnel, my eyes adjust quickly to the dark. I have good vision in the dark, I suppose from my creation. I think about Dizzy, and how…I wish there was a place for us. A place, where…we could laugh. Somewhere over the mountains on the horizon of the Capital Wasteland, and where all the roads are empty. A place, where Dizzy and I could just talk, laugh, and be honest. There'd be flowers, like the ones my father would talk about. Pre-war ones. Hell there doesn't even have to be that. It doesn't have to be beautiful, it just has to exist. A place, where Dizzy and I…could be. Could be in love, could be together, safe, and have nobody know anything about us.

Although vast, mom and dad have covered and made their names known all over the Capital Wasteland. People here know they have kids. Anyone who's seen them, and sees Dizzy and I, will make the connection. We like to fool ourselves into thinking that there's nothing out here that can hurt us, and nobody that knows us, but so many people pass through Megaton. So many people know we're the offspring of Dezbe and Charon, that it isn't even a question anymore. It protects us from enemies, because no one wants to piss either one of my parents off, but it hurts us. Because we can never be free. Not even the night, gives us freedom. I want a place, where it's just her and I. Where all else, is nothing. Nobody, would be able to understand how hard it is, to look at the person you love, and know…you'll never be able to kiss them, hold them, and show you love them, without being called a freak or monster.

My head pounds, and instead of getting better, I start to feel worse. It gets harder and harder to walk with each struggling step I take. What keeps me going, is the thought of finding Dizzy, and the stories of survival my parents told me about. How hard was it for them? Harder than a stupid hangover, that's for sure. How hard was it for dad to look at my mother, and know she didn't even know who he was when she lost her memory? How hard was it for mom to think my father was dead, that she killed him, when in truth he was still alive. They spent five years apart, thinking the other was in pain, or not even on this earth. My sickness, hardly compares, to what my parents went through.

In a sense, their situation is the same as Dizzy and I. With dad being a ghoul, and humans not liking ghouls, it was hard for them to be together. Without prejudice, that is. But they did it. Basically because they had no one else, and their friends accepted them. They didn't…care, really. But I care. I care on how it will look on them. And I care about the repercussions of my actions. I don't want, to disappoint them. They say, they're okay with it, but I don't know if they really are. In my head, I hear one hundred million angels screaming at me to lay down and rest. But I can't rest. I have to get back to the Capital Wasteland. I have to find Dizzy.