Hi. My apologies for how long this has taken, but I have a dilemma – originally this was just going to be a short, bittersweet romance about love and betrayal, but now it seems to have gone off the rails slightly. So I 've decided to throw it open - who wants us to go back to the romance, and see them reconciled, and who wants to go off on an adventure, with bad guys, murder and intrigue - a bit like Power Play, but without all the weirdness. I'll leave it with you, if you have a preference, every vote counts ;)
And again, all comments welcome, I appreciate you sticking with it.
.
.
.
"So," said Jade, rotating her glass carefully. "Tell me about Heather."
Tori pulled a face. She didn't really want to talk about Heather, but it looked as though this was a quid pro quo deal, and if she didn't give, she didn't get. "Not much to tell, really," she said. "I met her in the diner. She used to come in a couple of times a week, and we got talking."
"And you thought, she'll do, I'll move her right in."
"No! It wasn't like that. She was having a few problems at home, and then one day she came in, all upset because she'd left him, and I offered her a place to stay."
"Ah, I get it."
"Yes."
"So once you'd lured her back to your place with promises of chai and sympathy, you pounced..."
"Jade!"
"What? That's what you did to me."
.
.
.
That afternoon, in a small apartment. Late sun through the window, specks of dust dancing in the light. The spoils of a shopping trip strewn across the furniture, two girls talking, laughing, a friendship that had seemed unthinkable at school. Two girls sat side by side on a sofa, apparently comfortable and content with each other, one of them entirely unaware of the tumultuous decision being made, of the Rubicon being crossed, only inches away from her, as put her cup on the table and leaned back in easy silence. Unaware until she turned to find herself lost in dark brown eyes, dizzyingly close, and felt the ghost of a kiss across her lips...
.
.
.
"I didn't!"
"There I was, thinking we were having a nice girlie chat over a cup of cocoa, and before I knew it, you were having your wicked way with me over the credenza. I'm surprised you didn't lose your deposit."
"That's not how it happened!"
"Actually that would sound a lot funnier if you were a guy."
"Jade, please!" Tori said. "Don't say it was like that. I thought it was really special. Don't spoil it for me."
"Oh, come on. I was only kidding."
"Well don't. I don't want to feel like I pounced on you. I like to think you wanted it." She paused. "You did, didn't you?" she said, with a trace of doubt.
"Of course I wanted it," Jade said. "Why would you...? Is that why you were all weird about the other night?" she said. "Because you think you forced me into something?"
"I-"
"It is, isn't it?" Jade laughed. "I hate to ruin your image as a 'femme fatale', Tori, but you certainly didn't force me into it. You just took me by surprise, that's all."
"Really?"
"Yeah. And to be honest, I don't know why. I should have been expecting it."
"What do you mean?"
"You had the hots for me in school."
"I did not!"
"Yeah, you did."
"What makes you think that?"
"You don't remember that night after Trina's crappy TV show?"
"No," Tori lied.
"Oh," said Jade. "Well, there I was, laying on the sofa minding my own business, and you started fondling my legs, and..."
"I did not!" Tori said, hotly. "You put your legs on me! I had no choice."
"So you do remember it?"
...Well, yes," she said. "But I wasn't fondling. I was just... resting my arms."
"Uh-huh."
"I was! And why did you put your feet up anyway?"
"I dunno," Jade admitted. "It just felt right. Another drink?"
.
.
.
"I didn't leave you because I didn't love you, Tori. You have to believe that."
"Don't."
"What?"
"I don't want to hear it. All that 'it's not you, it's me' stuff. I know why you left me, I'm not an idiot."
"Tori..."
"It's nothing new, Jade. It happens all the time. And it doesn't matter how much you dress it up, how much you try to make me feel better about it, the truth is, you got bored. Trapped. You got sick of looking after me, running around after me, being the guy..."
"Will you stop with the 'guy' bit! Nobody was the 'guy', we were just us."
"...and then there was the college thing."
There was an uneasy silence. Leaving college had always been the elephant in the room. Jade had put her career on hold to work full-time to support them, and then Tori had dropped out, leaving them in debt and out of options, and she'd never been able to bring herself to tell Jade why.
"It wasn't the college thing."
"But it didn't help, did it? The thing is," Tori said, "I don't blame you in some ways, you know? Stuck doing that crappy little job, day after day, scraping through, thinking it's never going to change, and then Marcus comes along with his fancy car and his expensive suit and tells you he's going to make you a star. I wish that would happen to me."
There was a horrible silence.
"Oh God, I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."
"It's fine."
"But the point is, I don't-"
There was a heavy rapping at the door, of a tone that Jade had recently come to know quite well.
"You'd better answer that."
"They'll go away."
"No she won't."
"What do you-"
"Trust me."
Tori sighed in frustration, and went to the door. She opened it to find the worst possible visitor on the other side.
"I've come to talk."
She felt an almost uncontrollable urge to just slam the door and pretend this wasn't happening. "Heather," she hissed. "This is really a bad time." She moved to try and block the other woman's view into the apartment, which only served to make it worse.
"Is she here?"
"Who?"
"Your friend."
"She..." There was no sense in denying it. "Yes."
"Well that didn't take long."
"Heather!"
"Is everything okay?" Jade's voice drifted across from the sofa. Tori made the mistake of turning to look at her, and the next thing she knew Heather was through the door. Jade rose to put them on an equal footing, and the two of them stood, simmering in mutual enmity, while Tori wondered if she were stuck in some kind of horrible hidden-camera show.
Finally Heather broke away and turned to Tori. "Could we talk? In private?" There was a slight tilt of the head towards Jade, as though to imply she were an inconvenient stranger.
"No, Heather, we can't," she said. "If you think you can just come round here and-"
"Please?"
There was a little note of genuine pleading in her voice, and Jade knew, even before Tori turned to her, that she was going to give in. She rolled her eyes and sighed. "I'll be in the bedroom," she said, and headed off, ignoring Tori's mouthed apology.
Heather tapped her foot impatiently until Jade was out of sight. "Tori, look-"
"Not here," Tori said, with a last glance at the bedroom door. "In the kitchen."
.
.
.
Jade sat cross-legged on Tori's bed, feeling the particular streak of despondency that comes from listening to your lover bickering with their ex - a cruel reminder that they once shared a life with someone else, made particularly poignant by the fact that it was her fault, she was the one who left. She tried to picture them, living together in this apartment, an apartment that she still secretly thought of as hers, going through all the little routines of daily life, sitting snuggled up on the sofa watching TV, laughing, going to bed...
She tried to stop that thought right there, but it was too late. Heather and Tori together in bed. This bed. Her bed.
The tears, when they came, were hot with guilt, as she realized how Tori must have felt when she left, how many nights she must have spent crying, the long, dark hours with nothing to do but think about her girlfriend with someone else, imagining...
It was no consolation to tell herself that on those nights she'd been crying too, that somewhere in the darkness their tears might have mingled, that they might have reached out to comfort each other, if only in their dreams.
Because whatever Tori had imagined, she couldn't have imagined that.
She strained to hear their conversation, but the voices were muffled, audible but indistinct. Which was probably a blessing.
.
.
.
"I gave up everything for you!"
"No you didn't! You'd already left him!"
"But I could have gone back!"
"Then why didn't you?"
"Because you told me you loved me!"
"I..." Tori prayed that Jade wasn't listening. "I did."
"Then why break it off?"
"It wasn't working, Heather. All we did was fight all the time."
"No we didn't!"
"Don't you remember what it was like?"
It was apparent that Heather didn't. "I don't know what you mean! We were happy, weren't we? Well, I was."
"But I wasn't!" Tori snapped. "And if you'd ever thought about anything other than sex and money, you'd have noticed."
.
.
.
Jade's phone rang. She ignored it, as she'd been ignoring it for weeks. She knew who it was.
.
.
.
"I didn't-"
"Yes you did! You used to treat me like crap, bossing me about, like this was your place."
"Our place."
"My place, Heather. This was my place."
"So, what, I was just here on probation? I didn't come up to scratch?"
"Don't you dare! After everything I did for you-"
"I'm sorry, Tori," Heather's tone became less strident, conciliatory. "You're right. I was inconsiderate. It wouldn't be like that again, I promise. Just give me a chance to prove it. I love you, Tori."
.
.
.
The unanswered call was followed immediately by a text, as it always was. She glanced at it.
.
.
.
"No, Heather."
"What? I don't deserve even a chance?"
"It's not that simple, now."
"Why not?"
"Well..."
"Is it her? That little tramp out there?"
"Heather!"
.
.
.
Ten seconds later she finished retching over the bowl in the bathroom. No. No, no, no. This wasn't supposed to happen. She sank to the floor. Oh God. She sat with her feet pressed against the door, staring at the phone, fighting the panic. Who to call?
Karl. Karl would know. She flicked through the contacts and brought up the number.
"Hey, Karl? Karl, it's me. Listen... Yeah, I know he is. Is he still in... What? Well how early is 'early'? Oh Jesus. Fuck. Look, Karl, we never had this conversation, okay? Just give me... Please, Karl, come on, I'm begging here... Thanks. I owe you one. Bye."
She shut the phone down, letting it slip from her fingers, balling her fists and pressing them hard into her eyes. You stupid little girl. Now look what you've done. She could hear Tori's voice from the kitchen, defending her vociferously. She almost wept to think what she'd do when she found out. And yet there was nothing else she could do. She had to get to get to him before….
.
.
.
"There's nothing else to say, Heather."
"Well I think there is! Please, Tori..."
"No!"
Tori held the kitchen door open, impatiently, until Heather reluctantly went through it. "So that's it?" she said. "That's all I get?"
"Goodbye, Heather."
"I'll call you-"
"Don't."
The look on Heather's face was so devastated that Tori felt she had to say something. "Look, Heather, I'm sorry, okay?" she said, quietly. "It's just not going to work out. You need to move on. We both do."
It was probably a mistake. "Yes, well, that's easy for you to say," Heather said, coldly. "You've already moved on."
"It's not-"
But Heather was gone. Tori closed the door behind her, thankfully. She took a deep breath to quell the queasiness that confrontation always brought out in her, picked up the last unopened bottle, and headed towards the bedroom to make amends.
.
.
.
Thirty seconds later, the bottle hit the wall in a shower of broken glass, its destiny fulfilled. But by that time, Jade West was already on the freeway, heading East, the taste of bitter ashes in her mouth.
.
.
.