This is a little chapter (chapterette?) that I wrote on a whim because the one with the assist trophies I keep getting stuck on and I wanted to get one more thing up before school starts. So, since this is 2012, here's my take on the so-called "end of the world" and I even threw in a little ZeLink fluff to boot.
Disclaimer: I don't own SSBB, or Pirates of the Caribbean.
"Don't you just love this movie, Link?"
"Of course I do, why else would I watch it?"
Link knew very well that what he said to Zelda was an outright lie: he did not like Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. He didn't quite know why; all he knew was that something in that film irritated him to the point where he wanted to throw the remote at the TV. Maybe it was the fact this was the third time in three days he was watching it. The Hylian didn't seem to have the patience to do the same thing more than once in a certain period of time, unless he really found it enjoyable. Watching this movie was not one of those things.
Something else that was contributing to his mounting annoyance was the fact that Marth had planted himself in a chair next to the bed on which Link and Zelda were lying and was making it rather difficult for Link to put the moves on the princess beside him. He had succeeded in putting his arm around her, but anything beyond that was just too awkward with that prince in the room. Link sighed. At least the movie's almost over. Then Marth can get out of Zelda's room and I can FINALLY have some alone time with her.
Link was so busy thinking about what he would do once Marth left that he hardly noticed Zelda snuggling up to him. "Did you hear that the world is going to end in December?"
As Link nodded in reply, Marth groaned. "Here we go again with the whole 'end of the world.'"
"What are you talking about?" Link asked, annoyed that the Altean just couldn't have continued to be a silent wallflower.
"The world isn't going to end."
"How can you be so sure?" Zelda questioned good-naturedly. "I mean, what about the Mayan calendar, and Nibiru or Planet X, and super volcanoes and all of that?"
Marth scoffed. "Good grief, where do you guys get this stuff? I mean, really…you guys are all insane."
"I don't know," Link mused. "It really seems like this is actually going to happen..."
And then, before the other two even knew what they had started, Marth was off like a firecracker and there was no stopping him now. "Oh, for the love of…the world," he bellowed, "is NOT going to END! It can't end on December 21, and you know why? Because when it's the 21st here, it'll already be the 22nd on the other side of the world! What, you all think half the world is going to die one day, and the other half the next?" He hardly paused long enough for Link to make a strangled noise in an attempt to stop the barrage. Zelda, however, managed to get a couple words in: "All right then, let's just go back to watching the movie-"
"Not done yet," Marth quipped, throwing up a finger. "Did you know Sir Isaac Newton tried to predict when the world would end? He spent years trying to do it! And do you know when he guessed it would be?" He paused for effect. "1948. PLUS, the only things on this planet that pay attention to dates and times are humans. HUMANS. Asteroids don't care whether it's December or July, nor do volcanoes care whether it's Monday or Thursday. They happen when they happen, and no amount of studying ancient texts-and by the way, how the heck are the ancients supposed to know what's going to happen thousands of years after their time?-is going to tell us when." With that, he plopped down into his chair.
Just as Link breathed a sigh of relief, Marth piped up again. "Oh, and do you remember May of last year? Everyone thought the world was going to end then, too. Don't forget about Y2K, either. Every time so far in history that we've tried to predict the end of the world, we've been wrong. In my opinion, that's not very good odds for getting one right. Humans are idiots. We can guess all we want, but we're never going to get it." Without warning, he got up out of his chair, marched over to the door, and went out, slamming the door back shut.
"He's a nut!" Link exclaimed the second he heard Marth's footsteps receding down the hall.
"Yes, but the nut has a point, dear," Zelda said softly, patting Link's shoulder. "Give the crazy boy some credit."
"Fine," Link huffed, "but we'll see who's right come December."
Zelda didn't tell Link who she thought would be right. She didn't think he'd like her answer.
You can disagree with me all you like, but Marth's whole rant there is why I think the world isn't going to end. Next update will definitely be the assist trophy chapter, and you can count on as much random insanity as has been seen in previous chapters :)