I hope this isn't a letdown for you guys. It's kind of all over the place. I've been working on this on and off for the past 24 hours so it might not be that great, but here is chapter 30 anyways.
Both Clint and Natasha found it extremely hard to wander into the friend zone after being romantically linked for so long. Clint found it difficult to not lean in for a kiss instead of a hug when they parted ways, and every time Natasha reached to touch him, she always retracted her hand because it seemed like it felt wrong. The tension was always there, and neither one of them liked it, but it would've felt weird to just suddenly get back together after everything that had happened.
When Clint returned to State College following his winter break, he felt the urge to drink again, but because of Natasha, he resisted. If he wanted them to get back together, he was going to have to step it up. Natasha was stubborn, and it was going to be hard to win her back, but Clint was going to make it work. He'd won her over before, and he could do it again.
Natasha was visibly happier when she'd go to school. She wasn't happy that she and Clint still weren't back together but they were working on it so it put her in a better mood. Peggy and Jane were glad to finally see her smiling again and putting an effort into her friendships with them again, but Bruce didn't seem pleased. In the first half of the school year while she and Clint were broken, Bruce had begun to harbor a crush on Natasha. He would never ask her out because Clint intimidated him far too much, but he still couldn't help feeling a little lightheaded when he was around Natasha. Now that she and Clint were working things out, he couldn't help but feel like an idiot for thinking that they wouldn't go crawling back to one another. They'd been best friends ever since he scared off those playground bullies from teasing her so an eventual romance between them had been inevitable.
Natasha had to be honest; she missed Clint when he left for State College. It wasn't the yearning and longing she felt when they were dating, but she definitely missed him. She missed having him around to work things out. There was no chance for them to work on their friendship and their second chance at a relationship if he was three hours away. However, she was happy that he would be coming home the weekend of his birthday. It wasn't for her, she knew that for sure, but his parents had asked him to do it, so it made her happy that there would be another chance in the very near future for them to hang out again.
Natasha's spirits were struck down when her first acceptance letter came in the mail. Yes, she was ecstatic that she had gotten her first acceptance to a university, but the letter had brought her back to reality. She had gotten accepted to UC Berkeley, and then shortly thereafter, UCLA. She had applied to many more colleges and universities, but the fact that the two she had already gotten accepted to were on the other side of the country was a little intimidating. If they were the only schools she was going to get accepted to, then she and Clint's second chance was screwed.
When Clint came home for his birthday the first weekend of February, Natasha was conflicted as to how she was going to tell Clint that she had gotten accepted to two schools on the west coast. She knew he'd be happy for her because that's just how Clint was, but she didn't want to see him get distraught over the whole situation.
As she drove over to his house the night his parents had planned a dinner for his birthday, she planned out how she was going to break the news to him in her head. She reviewed it over and over, but no matter how many times she repeated it or organized it, it was still going to hurt him.
Clint greeted her at the door when she made it to his house, and he could immediately tell that she was nervous about something. Their separation had not dulled his strange sixth sense to notice when something was wrong with her. He wasn't going to bombard her with questions before dinner, let alone with a bunch of guests around, so he figured he'd just wait until they had a moment between just the two of them to ask.
Clint's parents had also brought Barney home for the weekend, and invited Peggy, Jane, and Thor – who was home for the weekend as well – to join them for dinner; Steve was pretty much stuck at Notre Dame due to how far away it was, but he told Clint on the phone that he desperately wished he could have came.
Clint's mom had cooked a fabulous dinner, complete with salad and a special homemade soup. The main course was cooked to perfection and even served as if it was from a five-star restaurant. For dessert, there was obviously a cake due to it being Clint's birthday. Clint's mom made it as well, and it was Clint's favorite, chocolate with peanut butter icing.
After they had sung happy birthday to Clint and devoured the cake to the point where just a tiny sliver was remaining, everyone retired to the living room. As everyone filed into the living room, Clint hung back in the kitchen and grabbed Natasha's arm as if to tell her to hang back too. She furrowed her brow in confusion but shrugged her shoulders and waited for the rest of the guests to trickle into the living room.
When Clint was sure that everyone was in the living room and fully engaged in a conversation, he turned to Natasha.
"Okay, what's wrong?" he asked.
"Huh?"
"You've been nervous ever since you walked through the door. What's wrong?"
Natasha sighed and walked over to her bag that was slung over the back of one of the kitchen table chairs. Clint watched on edge as she searched through it, and then eventually pulled out two folded pieces of paper.
"This isn't how I wanted to tell you but…" she trailed off, and handed the papers to Clint. He took them from her and immediately unfolded the top paper. It was an acceptance letter from UC Berkeley. He read each line twice, soaking in the news. He traded the UC Berkeley acceptance letter for the second piece of paper, and unfolded it to read it. This one was also an acceptance letter, but from UCLA.
"I'm just scared that these are the only two schools that are going to accept me," she mumbled, "and then we won't get another shot."
"No, Natasha. This is great. Fantastic," he said wearily. He was trying to be excited for her, and that was about as much as he could muster. He was proud of her, he really was. She had always been extremely intelligent and smart so there was no doubt that the top schools in the country would accept her. But she was right. If these were the only two schools that accepted her – which was a theory he greatly doubted – there would be no chance of them having another shot at being together.
"Then why do you sound so disappointed?" she whined.
"I want to work this out too," he said and then took a deep breath, "but I also want the best for you. If these are the only two schools that accept you, but I'm telling you that I doubt that will happen. But, if these are the only two schools that accept you, you need to go to one of them. That's an opportunity you can't pass up."
It pained Clint to say it, but he couldn't be selfish either. She had claimed to be holding Clint back. Well fine, so she had supposedly been holding him back, but he wasn't going to do that to her.
"Well fuck," she said as he handed her back the acceptance letters. She shoved them into the back pocket of her jeans, took a deep breath, and then swiftly crushed her lips up against Clint's. He wasn't expecting it but when she did it, it felt so familiar. Even after all the months of not having her lips against his, it felt just the same, like nothing had changed.
She pulled away but he didn't want to stop. He began trailing kisses down her neck and just barely brushed his lips against her collarbone as she tangled her fingers into his hair.
"Awkward," came a voice from behind them and they both gasped as they pulled away from each other.
"Mom wanted to know why you guys weren't in the living room so she sent me to check on you. I guess I can tell her you guys were busy making up," Barney said with a shrug.
"Jesus fucking Christ Barney! First you botch one of our potential first kisses, and now this!" Clint exclaimed.
"It's what I do best," Clint's brother said with a mischievous grin and then slunk out of the kitchen into the living room.
"What an asshole," Natasha said from beside Clint and he turned to see her shaking her head in disapproval at her brother.
"Yeah, he is," Clint agreed. "On another note, what the hell was that?"
Natasha shrugged. "In the heat of the moment?" she said with a nervous laugh.
He gently grabbed her by the elbow and then pulled her close to him and placed another quick kiss on her lips.
"I would say that was probably the best birthday present I've ever gotten," Clint said as he leaned in and kissed her again, softly but passionately. When they pulled away, they couldn't deny it anymore. They needed each other and they wanted each other. No amount of distance would change that.
If they could deal with the break up, they could certainly deal with a couple weeks of separation until Clint came home for his spring break. Spring break usually meant that all the college students flocked to the beach but at the beginning of March, it was still too cold to be outside in a swimsuit. To get any sort of joy out of spring break, college students had to go further south, and Clint didn't have the money to do that anyways even if he wanted to.
In the weeks leading up to Clint's spring break, Natasha received more college acceptance letters, including an acceptance from Penn State. When she received the acceptance packet in the mail, she immediately called Clint. Penn State wasn't very high up on her list of schools she wanted to attend but if she had slim pickings, Penn State it would be.
"I'm still holding out for NYU. You know that, right?" she said to Clint over the phone.
"Oh yeah, I know that," he said. He didn't sound even the slightest disappointed. He almost sounded excited.
"Are you okay? You sound really…giddy," she said uncertainly.
"Nope, everything's fine," he said.
Between Clint's birthday and his return home for spring break, Stroudsburg High School started advertising for prom by shoving posters down students' throats and assaulting their ears with constant announcements. Natasha figured she wasn't going to go to prom since she'd already been to it last year with Clint. Prom was prom. Just as long as she got to experience it, it didn't matter as to when she got to go.
However, Peggy and Jane weren't going to let her skip their senior prom so they constantly badgered her about going.
"Natasha, it's our senior prom!" Peggy whined one day during lunch.
"So?" Natasha said.
"It's more meaningful when it's your class's prom. Just because we went last year doesn't mean we can't go again," Jane explained.
"I know," Natasha said, poking at the food on her tray with her fork, "but I see no point in going."
"You have to go," Bruce chimed in.
"You want to go to prom?" Natasha asked.
"Not really, but might as well. That's one high school event I can say I experienced," Bruce said, shrugging his shoulders.
"Well, I'm not going," Natasha stated once again.
Bruce heaved a sigh and then pushed his chair out from the table. He then stood up on his chair, towering over all the students seated in the cafeteria.
"You are going to prom," Bruce demanded.
"Bruce, what the fuck? Sit your ass down!" she hissed, trying to hide her face from embarrassment.
"No, not until you agree to go to prom, and you agree to go with me," he announced.
"If I say yes, will you sit down?" Natasha asked, still hiding her face. Bruce nodded in response to her question.
"Okay fine! I'll go to prom with you, now sit the fuck down!" she shrieked, grabbing his hand to pull him to solid ground.
"Clint's going to be pissed," Peggy said.
"Shut up. I'm going to prom with you guys. Doesn't that matter?" Natasha snarled and angrily stabbed at the food on her tray.
It seemed like every time she saw Clint since their reconciliation around Christmas she was extremely nervous about something. First, she was nervous about showing Clint the acceptance letters to UC Berkeley and UCLA. Now, she was nervous to tell him that she was going to prom with Bruce.
She figured he wouldn't care since he'd already been to his own prom, but Clint had gotten extremely territorial around Alexei, so he wasn't sure how he would take the news that Bruce was taking her to prom.
As much as she wanted to hang out with Clint over his spring break, she avoided him, both voluntary and involuntary. During the week, she was at school, and then afterwards, she would have work. Add in school work and comparing the options from colleges that she had gotten accepted to, she had no time. She knew Clint was getting frustrated because they'd spent maybe a total of ten minutes together since he'd been home and she was beginning to shoot down every chance for them to hang out.
Clint knew she didn't work that Friday, so he called her and politely asked her if she would come over. Of course she tried to make up an excuse as to why she couldn't but Clint just shot it down and demanded that she come over.
When she arrived, she had that nervous look on her face. Clint knew that she had been purposely avoiding him for a reason, and it made his uneasy. Was she having second thoughts about their rekindled relationship?
She had brought more college acceptance letters with her to show Clint. She was really excited that she had gotten accepted to Temple University but she constantly reminded Clint that she was still holding out for NYU; she wouldn't find out the decision until the beginning of April. However, Clint knew that the acceptance letters weren't bugging her that much anymore, so whatever she was nervous about, it was something completely different.
"What is going on with you now?" he asked as they sat on his living room couch watching a movie. Natasha nearly jumped ten feet in the air when Clint broke the silence, but she knew she couldn't hide this from him for much longer.
"Umm…" she trailed off. "I'm kind of, maybe, sort of going to prom without you."
"Okay? So? We went last year," he stated.
"Okay, but that's not all," she said and he bobbed his head up and down to signal for her to keep going.
"I'm going with Bruce Banner," she said and then slightly flinched. She was afraid he was going to get angry, fly off the handle, and get angry with her. Instead, he just furrowed his brow in confusion and shook his head.
"So, you're going to prom with Bruce. That's fine. It's just prom," he said shrugging his shoulders.
"Are you sure?" she asked, unconvinced.
"Yeah," he said with a chuckle. "You've really got to stop stressing yourself out."
Clint leaned in and kissed her on the cheek to ease the tension but stopped when he noticed the silver chain wrapped around her neck. It wasn't necessarily the chain that caught his attention but the item that was hanging from it. He gingerly took the ring he bought her from Tiffany's between his thumb and forefinger as he felt her suck in a nervous breath.
Well, at least she's still wearing it, Clint thought, but he was still sort of hurt that it was around her neck instead of her ring finger.
"Sorry," she mumbled. "It just would've felt weird to have it back on my finger."
Clint shook his head. "No, it's okay. I should've guessed that you'd take it off."
Natasha scooted over on the couch and rested her head on Clint's shoulder. Simple gestures such as this were getting easier for Natasha but it still felt awkward to her at times. Little by little, they'd be able to get back to the way they were, if that was even possible.
"You know what, I'm going to fix this," Clint said, squirming so he could face Natasha, whose head was still resting on his shoulder. She looked at him in confusion.
"We never went on a first date, unless Coney Island counts," Clint said. "So, I'm going to ask you out."
Natasha rolled her eyes. "You don't have to do this," she said.
"I don't have to, but I want to," Clint said. "So, Natasha, will you go on a date with me?"
Natasha rolled her eyes again. "Yes Clint, I will go on a date with you."
He leaned in to kiss her but she pushed him away.
"I don't kiss before the first date."
When Natasha finished with her shift on Saturday, she returned home and hopped in the shower to get ready for her "date" with Clint. It was ridiculous to think of it as a date seeing as they were romantically involved for over two years and now, were currently working on their relationship. As she stepped out of the shower, dried herself off, wrapped herself up in a towel, and then made her way down the hall to her bedroom, she started to worry over what to wear. It seemed ridiculous because Clint would like whatever she had on, but the jitters a girl would get before a first date were starting to kick in.
It was still a bit chilly for the beginning of March, so Natasha slipped on a black skirt with some tights and a white top. She curled her hair the way she knew Clint liked it – just barely brushing her shoulders – and slapped on a hint of makeup.
As she was finishing up in the bathroom, she heard the doorbell ring and she rushed to the door to answer it. She opened the door and saw Clint standing on her front porch with a wide grin plastered on his face.
"Hey," he said.
"Hi," she said. "Umm, do you want to come in? I'm almost done."
Clint stepped over the threshold and closed the door behind him. Natasha rushed back to the bathroom, but this time, closed the door behind her. She placed her hands on the edge of the counter top and looked at herself in the mirror.
"Okay, this is no big deal," Natasha said to her reflection. "It's just a date. With your best friend, then boyfriend, then ex-boyfriend, then friend, and now possible boyfriend. Yeah, no big deal."
She took a deep breath, finished up in the bathroom, then quickly rushed into her bedroom to grab her coat, shoes, and bag before traipsing back out into the living room where Clint was. He was still standing by the door with his hands jammed into his coat pockets and she flashed him a smile when she reentered the room.
"Ready?" he asked.
"Yeah, just let me…" she trailed off as she grabbed him by the shoulder for support to slip on her shoes. "Okay, yeah, I'm ready."
Clint opened her front door and gestured for her to go first. She stepped over the threshold with Clint behind her, closing the door behind them. He sped up to reach car before her so he could open the door for her and she slid into the passenger seat. She watched as Clint walked around the front of the car and then slid into the driver's seat.
She had no idea where they were going when Clint pulled out of her driveway and he wouldn't tell her. Natasha's idea of a first date was dinner and a movie, and then at the end of the night, the guy would drop the girl off and maybe give her a kiss on the front porch. But this was Clint, and he enjoyed pulling out all the stops. He didn't like doing things simply.
When they drove through Main Street and then crossed the bridge, Natasha had a feeling he was taking her to the park where he held the performance for his sixteenth birthday. Clint turned down the road leading to the park and her suspicions were confirmed. They pulled into the same exact spot as Bruce had two years ago when he delivered her to the park for Clint.
The headlights illuminated the wooden gazebo which was adorned with the same white twinkle lights Clint used for her sixteenth birthday. The gazebo was empty and Natasha was wondering exactly what Clint had planned for their "date." He cut the engine and then got out of the car, rounding the front, and opened the passenger side door for Natasha.
"Is this your idea of a first date?" Natasha asked teasingly as she got out of the car. Clint didn't say anything as they walked towards the gazebo. When they reached it, Clint took Natasha's hand and guided her up into the wooden structure. They stood in the middle in silence, both of them standing there awkwardly with their hands shoved into their coat pockets.
"Okay, so, I really had no idea what to do on a first date. I brought you here because I thought it would be nice but I'm drawing a blank as to what to do," he said with a chuckle. "I did buy you Twizzlers though. They're still your favorite right?"
He reached down into a bag in the corner of the gazebo and pulled out a pack of Twizzlers. Natasha gingerly took them in her hands and laughed.
"Yeah, they're still my favorite," she said. "So, do you just want to eat Twizzlers all night?"
"I'm out of ideas. I guess I used them all up when I was in high school," Clint said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Natasha giggled. "It's fine. I feel like we've experienced everything we've needed to experience in our relationship that a first date isn't even necessary anymore."
She sat down on the floor of the gazebo, tucking her legs underneath her in a lady-like fashion. She ripped open the bag of Twizzlers and pulled out two, one for her and one for Clint. She patted the space next to her to let Clint know that he can sit down next her. He sat down as she handed him a Twizzler.
They sat in silence, eating Twizzlers and admiring the landscape that surrounded the gazebo. They could feel the temperature dropping as they continued to sit there devouring the red candy.
"Clint, umm," she started, nervous to continue, but when Clint's blue-grey eyes looked right at her, she nearly lost her train of thought.
"What?" he asked.
"Umm, are we…are we officially back together?" Natasha asked, keeping her eyes trained on the bag of Twizzlers in her lap. It seemed like a strange question to ask. Even though he slipped in a simple kiss for her every so often, it still didn't feel like they were back together. Ever since that kiss in his kitchen on his birthday, it was never officially noted that they were back together. They don't hold hands like they used to, and when they sit on the couch together, they usually sit with a decent amount of space in between them. He used to call her either Nat or Tasha, but now, he only calls her Natasha. Most importantly, they don't tell each other "I love you" like they used to. Those three simple words used to fall out of their mouths like word vomit. Now, it's hardly even noted.
"Umm, you tell me," he said. "I'm not trying to sound like a dick, but you're the one who ended it, and I don't want to pressure you to officially start it up again. So if you want us to be back together, then we can be if you want."
"It's just…ever since your birthday, we never officially said that we were back together. It feels like we're friends with benefits right now, minus the sex aspect," she said.
Clint shrugged. "You just have to say so, Natasha."
"Stop calling me Natasha," she snapped. "I'm sick of hearing it. Can you please go back to calling me Nat or Tasha?"
"Yeah, Nat," he said with a chuckle. "Anything else?"
She hesitated to answer but then she drew in a deep breath and then exhaled. "I don't want to be just friends anymore. That kiss in your kitchen on your birthday made me realize that I don't want to be just friends with you. I can't be just friends with you. And you're being so incredibly patient for someone who was so hostile against this idea in the first place, and I'm sorry for not realizing it soo - ."
She had begun to ramble so Clint stopped her by attacking her lips with his. He reached his hand up to cup the side of her face and she reciprocated the gesture by bringing both of her hands up to touch his face. She started to lean back onto the gazebo floor and Clint put his hand around her back to gently lower her so that she didn't hurt her back on the floor. The only time they broke the kiss was for a quick breath but otherwise, they kissed to make up for the lost time.
That's when Natasha realized that he would be leaving tomorrow to return to State College and the thought made her so angry that she broke off the kiss and punched him in the shoulder.
"You're an ass," she said, pushing him off of her and raising herself up into a sitting position.
"Ow!" he exclaimed, rubbing his shoulder. "What the fuck? What did I do?"
"You're leaving tomorrow to go back to State College, and you pretty much just tricked me into getting back together with you."
"Nat, I didn't trick you," he said. "I told you. It's your choice. If you don't want to, just say so. You of all people know that I still want you, and I'll wait for you, but I'm not going to start it. That's all on you."
Natasha sighed. "I just don't want to get hurt again, even though it was my own doing in the first place," she muttered under her breath.
"You won't," he said. "I don't know how many times I have to tell you that we'll make it work. I'd do anything and everything for you."
Natasha sighed. "Okay," she said. "Okay, but you have to promise me you won't throw your life away at Penn State to come home to see me."
"I promise," he said, then smiled and leaned in to kiss her again. She fell back against the floor of the gazebo and let Clint's lips search hers. He trailed kisses down her jaw, then her neck, and then to her collarbone. When he reached for the promise ring he had given her that was currently around her neck, she didn't protest. He pulled the chain over her head, took the ring off of the chain, and slipped the ring back onto her left ring finger where it would stay no matter what happened.
Like I said, if it was a letdown I'm sorry haha. I really do have to write something all in one sitting unless it's not consistent or it doesn't make sense. But they're back together! Yay!
As always, thank you for adding this to your favorites, signing up for alerts, and reviewing. Let me know if you're happy that they're back together! Oh who am I kidding, I KNOW you guys are happy they're back together. But let me know how you feel about it!