He arrived back at his flat and it was a total mess as he had hardly been there recently because he had either been at Lara's or in the ED. He tidied up the immediate mess, and then went through to his bedroom to change into his 'watching MOTD clothes' as Zoe used to call them, he laughed to himself as he put on his West Ham top and a pair of pyjama bottoms. He thought about the fact that Zoe was always such a laugh and was one of the few people who could tell Nick exactly what she thought of him. He missed that.

Nick settled down on the sofa with his 'out of a packet' dinner and a beer, the West Ham highlights were just starting which was perfect timing. His phone beeped, he ignored it as it was in his jacket pocket anyway. Ten minutes passed, and a few goals for Nick's mighty Hammers, and his phone beeped again, he thought he had better just check it in case something was wrong with Lara, this worry confused him… did he care about her? The whole thing was beginning to mess with his head. As he walked towards his jacket there were no thoughts in his head that it would be anyone but Lara so Nick got the fright of his life when he pulled it out of his pocket and Zoe's name flashed up.

'What you up to? I am bored senseless visiting my Mum, I don't think I can bitch about my Aunties for any longer! Can I come over after I am done here? Zo x'

The second text was also from Zoe.

'And I don't mean I want to come over for any funny business, just fancy a chat like the old times… I have a feeling you have some gossip for me Mr J! I know you record MOTD anyway so don't say you are too busy watching that! Zo x'

He couldn't believe that Zoe had text him literally twenty minutes after he had been thinking about how much he missed her. "Ha, gossip. You have not changed Miss Hanna…" Nick said to himself as he typed his reply.

'Yeah sure, I could do with a chat to be honest. Gossip… what on earth could you mean Zo? ;) Could you bring some wine? I haven't been to the shops in days. See you soon yeah? Nick xx'

His heart was in his mouth, she had this effect on him. Zoe had already insinuated that they were not going to end up in bed together tonight and Nick was fine with that. In fact he was actually grateful, he just wanted to speak to her, to see her, he trusted her and she knew him like no one else. He knew that everything that had happened between them had hit her hard, they were truly in love with each other before the lies began, but the lies were not something Nick wanted to dwell on, Zoe was coming round to see him and he was delighted.

'Yeah no probs, wine it is. Oh Nick hasn't been shopping… what a surprise. Yeah give me 20 mins. Zo xx'

"So Nick? Who is she?" asked Zoe as she took a sip of the wine with a devilish grin on her face. She had arrived with the usual Zoe presence five minutes before and she hadn't bothered to knock on the front door, rather she just barged straight in with about 10 Tesco bags which were full of shopping for Nick. "For Christ sake… I can't keep anything from you can I?" replied Nick with a slightly smug grin. "Nope! Ha-ha! C'mon Nicolo! Spill!"… Only Nick's mother and Zoe ever called him Nicolo, and it gave him a funny feeling whenever he heard it. Nick hesitated - "Ok… but keep it to yourself Zo? Please". "Nick, I promise." Zoe looked at him as if to say 'you can trust me'.

Nick began to tell Zoe, who was sitting on the couch next to him, about Lara; about how she was beautiful, young, successful, wild in bed and that he was pretty sure that she was falling for him. He spoke for at least 10 minutes, retelling the story of the last month for the first time. "Nick… I am failing to see the problem here? She slept with you half an hour after meeting you, she is your kind of girl! She sounds brilliant Nick, so what if she is 24, your maturity levels are around that age anyway… what's up?" Zoe asked this question in a jokey sort of way but knew that she was going to get a serious answer. "I don't know. That's the problem, it just doesn't seem right. I feel like I am taking advantage of her and that I am going to mess her up like I have messed up everyone else I have been with." Nick said this with such sadness in his eyes that it made Zoe reach for his hand to comfort him – "Nick… You haven't messed me up. We both just screwed up, that happens in life. I still love and care about you and seeing you like this just breaks my heart Nicky!" she gave him a smile. Nick looked directly into her eyes and whispered "Thank you."

"Nick I mean it, why don't you give it a go and stop worrying about things so much, the girl obviously likes you, and let's be honest, the way you are talking about her… it is clear that you have feelings for her. You are not going to find out how strong and real these feelings are until you just relax and try to have a normal relationship with her." Zoe stared at Nick. "Do you really think I should? I just worry that because it doesn't feel perfect that I shouldn't bother, why waste my time on anything more than sex if it's not going to go anywhere. It doesn't feel like me and you Zo." Nick said this in a voice that Zoe had not heard since they were talking about her 'pregnancy' a few years ago and it melted her heart. "Sweetie… we were something special, but we have been there and done it. Too many hurtful things were said for us to be together again. I know exactly what you mean though… I will always compare other men to you Nick, but we both need to get over this. Move on." Zoe said this as tears filled her eyes.

They sat together on Nick's couch, holding hands for another hour or so, talking about everything and anything. They had both had too much to drink and Nick had work in the morning so Zoe called herself a taxi. "Nick, promise me you will call her tomorrow? Just loosen up a bit and see where it goes. I want you to be happy." Zoe kissed his forehead as she got off the couch to collect her bag and coat.

Nick followed her to the door, it was only ever Zoe that saw this side of Nick, no one else. "Thanks… yeah I will. I'll try and grow up a bit… I have been acting like a 16 year old about this and it took talking to you to realise this Zo." He looked at her deep into her brown eyes, he was saying all of this to keep her happy, but he knew deep down that he would never get over her, that he would never be truly happy again unless he was with her. He wasn't going to let her know that though, she wanted him to move on and he would. They hugged goodbye with promises of phone calls tomorrow.

As he heard Zoe's taxi pull away, Nick pulled out his phone and typed a message to Lara.

'Hey you. You home yet? Let me know when you are back in, I am a bit drunk and fancied a dirty phone call. Nicky x

This was the only way he knew how to move on.