This one is for Liv - wanted to give you something to read :)
Thanks to my Beta :)
Enjoy!
Just a kiss
Emma looked slightly confused when she opened her door, hesitating before she awkwardly blurted "You - oh shit I totally forgot, I'm sorry!" to her visitor.
"That is some way to welcome your guest. You sure do know how to make a girl feel welcome," Karin said chuckling.
"I'm sorry, come in. I've just totally forgotten our plans," Emma said with a blush, a little embarrassed that she had forgotten that she had planned to practice the duet with Karin.
"Hey don't worry. It's okay. Shall we get started?" Karin asked while patting Emma on her arm. Entering Emma's room behind her she thought to herself that Emma was really cute when she was blushing.
They both sat down on Emma's bed and Karin took out her music notes and the lyrics from her backpack while asking Emma if she had had a look at it and had any thoughts about how they should act out and sing the song.
Emma shook her head. Still embarrassed, she had to admit that she really hadn't thought about the assignment and that she had totally forgotten all about their plans for today. Apologizing, she asked Karin if she wanted something to drink to change the subject. She really didn't like that she wasn't prepared and that she hadn't practiced the song, but her mind had been occupied by Jenny lately.
She apologized to Karin yet again, before going to the kitchen to make some coffee for them. While in the kitchen, she took some Digestive biscuits and grapes and put them on a plate for them to nibble on while they were going through their assignment.
When Emma walked back into the room, Karin looked up from the floor where she had now seated herself with her notes spread out around her. Karin's gaze lingered on Emma's smile. She thought that Emma had the cutest smile. When their teacher had paired them together she couldn't help the small feeling of butterflies stirring in her stomach. She had been admiring Emma from afar since the beginning of the school year. She didn't think she had a chance, seeing as she was sure that Emma was straight.
Emma sat down in front of Karin and handed her a cup of coffee. She put the plate down between them and looked around at all the notes Karin had spread around the floor. "Wow, you've made a lot of notes," she said, once again silently cursing herself for forgetting about the assignment and their plans to get started on it today.
"Yeah well, aren't you glad I came prepared?" Karin teasingly said to Emma, winking at her.
"Yes ... well ... again I'm so sorry, but I've just been…." Emma, flustered, started emmaing, not knowing what to say.
"Hey don't worry about. I was only teasing, Emma," Karin said, smiling while reaching over to pat Emma on her arm to reassure her that everything was okay. All the while thinking that Emma was also cute when she got all flustered.
"So Emma, this is how I've been thinking we could sing the song as a duet and act it out," Karin said while picking up some notes and handing them to Emma to change the subject and show Emma that she was okay with it all. She had never in her life been so prepared for an assignment. But she knew how prepared and professional Emma always was in every class and, somehow, she felt the need to impress her.
Emma sat looking at the papers Karin had given her and she had to admit that she was truly impressed. The work she had done was really good. She had always believed that Karin wasn't the type to do homework or prepare much for classes, but she must have gotten the wrong impression of her. The only thing about the notes that troubled her was the end of the act. Karin had written 'and we kiss'. "This really looks good Karin, but I don't know about the ending. Can't we find another one?" She really didn't want to kiss another girl. She felt she would be betraying Jenny.
"What are you talking about?" Karin looked quizzically at Emma, wondering why she didn't like the ending.
"Uhmmm the ... The kiss" Emma quietly stuttered, looking down at the floor.
Karin looked at Emma and suddenly it dawned on her why Emma was afraid of the kiss. "The kiss… Well, seeing as the song is about kissing, I kind of think we have to kiss in the end, when we act out the song. I don't think there is any way around it. Is it because I'm a girl? Then don't worry, I've kissed girls before and it isn't that much different than boys. It is softer perhaps. And everyone knows that it's just an act, " Karin said, smiling at Emma to try to reassure her that everything was okay and that it was just a simple kiss. But inwardly she was looking forward to kissing Emma's beautiful lips, even if it was just an act.
Throwing her hands up in the air as if to show Karin she surrendered, Emma sighed. She knew Karin was right. It was just acting and eventually she would have to kiss other people for her career. So she should just be professional and do it. And she was sure that Jenny would understand everything when she told her about the assignment and how important it was for her grade in that class. "Okay Karin let's do it, but no tongue." Emma said seriously.
"No no, of course not. We wouldn't want our teacher and all the boys to get too excited, would we?" Karin laughed, but inwardly she sighed, as she wouldn't have minded French kissing with Emma.
"Certainly not," Emma giggled, very relieved that Karin was agreeing with her. She wasn't ready to stand in front of her whole class French kissing another girl. In fact she wasn't ready to kiss any other girl than Jenny, period.
"Right, shall we get started? Do you have the song on your laptop? If not I have it on my IPod," Karin said while standing up and collecting all the notes spread out on the floor.
Emma got up and moved the tray to the table next to her laptop. "I have it on my laptop. I'll find it and put it on."
They started rehearsing the song. First they both sang the whole song, but they quickly found which parts they should each sing. Rehearsing the song over and over a couple of more times, they both agreed that their voices actually fit together well for this song.
After singing the song a few more times they decided to try and act out the song while singing.
Both Emma and Karin stood hugging. They had agreed that it would be the perfect start to their duet. Emma started singing, while they both slowly moved away from each other.
"Lyin' here with you so close to me
It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe
I'm caught up in this moment, caught up in your smile"
Karin started singing along while they both danced slowly around each other bringing life to the story of two girls who had just fallen in love with each other.
"I've never opened up to anyone
So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms
We don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow"
"Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
No, I don't want to push too far"
"Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby, I'm alright with just a kiss goodnight"
Karin couldn't help but think that it would be nice to sing this song to Emma for real and be able to kiss her goodnight every day.
"I know that if we give this a little time
It'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find
It's never felt so real, no, it's never felt so right"
While Emma was singing the lyrics, she realized they fit her and Jenny when they first met. Jenny had been so patient with her and waited for her to be ready to take the next step.
"Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
No, I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far"
Emma couldn't help but think about how much she hoped she would be able to kiss Jenny goodnight every night again. She missed that so much.
"Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby, I'm alright with just a kiss goodnight"
"No, I don't want to say goodnight
I know it's time to leave
But you'll be in my dreams
Tonight, tonight, tonight"
As they danced, they both moved closer to each other again, swaying to the music and holding hands.
"Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far"
Emma closed her eyes, swaying and singing, moving ever closer to Karin. But all she could think of was Jenny. Being in Jenny's arms, dancing closely and singing love songs into her ear.
"Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby, I'm alright"
Karin looked at Emma and thought she was so pretty when she was dancing so close to her with her eyes closed and singing sweetly, as if Karin was the only one in Emma's world. She could feel butterflies building inside her. This was it. Soon she would get to kiss the girl she had fallen for.
"Oh, let's do this right with just a kiss goodnight
With a kiss goodnight, kiss goodnight"
Emma still had her eyes closed, pictures of Jenny running through her mind, when she sang the last word. She felt soft lips touch hers and, sighing, she kissed them again. Ohh Jenny, I've missed your lips and your kiss so much she thought to herself while letting the kiss develop. She let herself be pushed against the wall, still lost in the kiss.
She suddenly heard a moan that didn't sound familiar to her. She opened her eyes and, shocked, she pushed Karin hard away from her. "What the fuck are you doing Karin? – This wasn't what we talked about and agreed on."
Confused, Karin looked at Emma. " I… I thought you wanted to. It felt like you wanted to. You kissed me back!"
"No I don't want to kiss you. I have a girlfriend Karin. One who I am deeply in love with," Emma yelled angrily.
"Well it didn't feel that way two minutes ago!" Karin yelled back, totally stunned that Emma had a girlfriend, but also that Emma was putting all the blame on her. Emma had definitely kissed her back.
Still fuming, Emma pointed at the door. "Get out of here… Get out now." She was furious that Karin had used her like that, that she had used their assignment to kiss her. But she was also angry with herself for kissing her back. She would never have thought that she would do something like that. But in that moment, all she could see was Jenny and she had truly forgotten everything about Karin and the assignment. She told herself she thought she was kissing Jenny.
Karin moved in close to Emma so she stood just inches away from her. "Fine, I'll leave now Emma, but it wasn't just me. You were just as into the kiss as I was…. And don't forget that this assignment is important for our grade so you had better show up when we have to perform it in front of class." Karin, hurt and angry, hissed before walking over to the bed, grabbing her stuff and hurrying out before she could start to cry. She didn't want Emma to see her cry.
Feeling frustrated, hurt, angry, remorseful, sad and confused, Emma threw herself on the bed. Reaching out for her pillow she put it over her mouth before screaming into it. The scream quickly turned to crying. While her tears flowed, her phone started to ring. She knew from the sound of the ring tone that it was Jenny calling her. She picked up her phone but couldn't bring herself to answer it. How could she tell Jenny what just had happened? How could she tell her that she had kissed another girl? It would break Jenny's heart and it would tear them apart forever. The phone stopped ringing but quickly began again. She put the phone on silent and moved it to the night table next to the bed. She couldn't face talking to Jenny. Turning around towards the wall, hugging her spare pillow, she cried herself to sleep to the sound of the phone vibrating on the night table several more times as Jenny called.