Just Keep On Keeping On: Lies
Jade comes early. 9:03 to be precise. She knocks on the door and I open it up, knowing exactly who it is.
"Hey Robbie," she greets me, eyes shining brightly. I hate to admit that she looks great. She gained some weight back and her hair seemed fuller and sleeker and her skin seemed to be radiating that healthiness it did when we were back in high school. She gives a flip of her ebony hair and I give her a weak smile.
"You did it."
"Yeah," she says. "I did it for now. It's still tough and there's a lot more work to be done."
I nod in recognition of her accomplishment and reluctantly step back and she comes into the house, walking proudly and with a purpose. "Steven?" she calls. "Steven, Ja- Mommy's here!" Steven comes running out from the bedroom, hollering his hello and throws himself onto her with a big hug. She bends down and ruffles his hair, smiling a genuine smile.
"I've missed you Stevie," she says.
"I missed you to Jad-"
"Mommy. Call me Mommy," she grins happily at him and at first Steven looks uneasy, but then he breaks out into a broad smile and envelops Jade into another hug. I watch the scene feeling sickly. This shouldn't be happening. Steven shouldn't just be jumping back into Jade's arms. This isn't fair. This isn't right.
"Mommy!" Steven chirps happily.
"That's right honey," Jade encourages him. "I've missed you so, so much. I'm sorry for leaving you baby. It'll never happen again. None of this will ever happen again," Jade tells him, pure euphoria radiating off of her in waves. She's so happy...
And Steven is too.
"Really Mommy?"
"Really baby. We're going to put the past behind us and you're going to go back to your school and see your friends again and we're going to live together again and even Cat will come down and stay with us. You remember Cat, right? Of course you do. We're going to be a family again." She's changed. She really has. I haven't seen Jade this happy for a long, long time. It's almost refreshing, but at the same time, a small part of me wishes this wasn't happening. That Jade wasn't happy. That she wasn't changed.
"Yay Mommy! I can't wait to tell you everyting dat happened!" excitedly tells her.
"Great! How about you tell me on the way back to Hollywood?" Steven pulls away from his mother with a frown. "What's wrong Stevie?"
"Hollywood? We go back there?"
"Yeah, of course," Jade laughs a bit despite her confusion. She looks towards me and I shrug, letting her know I haven't told him anything. She sends a glare my way and it's good to see that this sickeningly sweet Jade isn't as nice as she seems. She's still Jade West somewhere in there. Just a transformed one.
"But...But what about Robbie?"
"Well he just babysat you for a while. Now it's time to go home," Jade explains.
"But...But...I'm going to miss him," he protests.
"I know, Steven, I know. But it's okay. You'll see him again," she lies.
"I will?"
"Yeah!" she lies again.
"I dunno..."
Before Jade can speak again, I interject with my own two cents. "Let me talk to him Jade. I got this." She narrows her eyes at me but nods and I take Steven into the bedroom. "Hey buddy...Do...Do you remember that story I told you last night with the knight and the little shark?"
"Yeah?"
"Well, just like the little shark it's time for you to go with your family. I'm going to miss you buddy, but it's for the best. I mean, you do miss your mom, don't you?" He nods his head. "Then it's okay. We'll see each other again." My voice almost breaks, but I keep it steady, holding myself together the best I could.
"But I want to see you everyday Robbie," he pouts and I pull him into a tight hug.
"I know buddy, I know. But your Mommy misses you and I know it's hard to go, but sometimes in life you have to do hard things. Besides, this isn't permanent," I add, struggling to keep my composure.
"I knows, but..."
"Hey, cheer up, okay? Your Mommy is back! Yay! Now you can go back to all your friends and family and tell them about all the fun times you had here and how excited you are that I'm coming up to Hollywood in a little bit!" I lie, forcing the happiness. Jade was never going to allow me back to see him. Besides, I don't even think Jade's serious about going to Hollywood. More likely than not it's just to throw me off. I still don't trust her. Not with things like this.
"You will?" Steven brightens up and a big smile is plastered on his face. I won't, but he'll probably eventually forget what I say today anyway. "Yay!" He throws himself onto me, giving me a big hug and I press a kiss to his head.
"Now why don't we go back out to Mommy? She's waiting for you after all!"
"I have to pack though!"
"No, it's okay, I got all your stuff ready last night," I inform him, pointing to bags that were huddled in the corner. He nods his head and then bounces back towards Jade and I grab his bags, lugging them out into the room Jade and Steven were in. "Here you go," I cheerily say, even though I feel like shit.
"Great, thanks Robbie," Jade smiles, taking the bags from me. "Now why don't you say bye to Robbie and then let's get going," Jade encourages her child, already heading towards the door. She opens it wide and waits for her child to hop on after her.
"Bye Robbie!" he exclaims, waving his hand crazily. I wave back, a small grin on my face, betraying everything I felt at that moment. And then he bounds out of the house and Jade lingers for half a second.
"Thank you Robbie. For everything. I owe my life to you." And with that, she shuts the door and they're gone.
I feel stiff. Just completely unmovable. I can't react. Can't do anything but stare at the door. I don't feel anything except this overwhelming sadness, and can't move except to blink my eyes. I don't know how long I'm there for, but apparently not that long because soon the door snaps open again and a little toddler is rushing into my house and jumping into my arms.
"Robbie!" he cries, wrapping his arms around my neck.
"Steven! Why...Why are you back here?"
"I needed to come say bye! For real!" he proclaimed.
"Yeah?" I croaked out.
"Yep! I can't just leave without no proper goodbyes!" He pulls back and looks me square in the eyes. "I'm going to miss you Robbie so much! But you're gonna come up real soon and visit, right?"
"Right," I weakly lie.
We stare at each other for a while, neither of us knowing what to say. It feels like there is a lot for me to tell him, a lot for us still to do like go to a movie theater or spend an entire day hiking or...or...I feel a lump in my throat start to form making it hard to swallow. My eyes start to tear up and I want to look away, but I know this right here will be the last mental visualize I have of Steven.
"Aw...Robbie, don't cry," he says softly and gently rubs the tears from my eyes. "We gonna see each other real soon, 'kay?...Pwease don't cry..." And it's like a chain reaction because Steven's eyes tear up as well.
"I...I...I love you Daddy!" Steven finally breaks down, throwing his arms around my neck. And we hold each other like that, just staying there, until I know he has to leave. I put him down on the ground and give him a stern look.
"Now be good for your Mommy, okay? And remember, don't answer the door for strangers, call 911 if someone is trying to kill you, and if something bursts into flames then-"
"Crawl under the smoke until I'm out. I got it, I got it," Steven reminds me.
"That's right. So be a good boy, okay...And I'll come down real soon," I promise, my heart aching more and more the longer this conversation continues. Steven nods his head fiercely.
"Bye bye!" he says to me one more time, with one last hug, before he scampers towards the door.
"I love you!" I call after him and he turns in the doorway, gives me a wink, and repeats the same thing back to me before tugging the door closed and dashing away. Then I hear a car drive away from outside and I know this time he's gone for good.
Then? Well then I grab a chair at the table and stare at the wall for a while. Just stare, stare, stare, until eventually staring becomes crying.
Author's Note: This made me sad to write. And everyone seems to keep lying to Steven.
NEXT CHAPTER IS THE LAST CHAPTER.
And maybe...just maybe...