AN: Sorry its taken so long to update this story. I was very seriously considering ending it with the last chapter because who doesn't like a happy/cute ending. However, I believe that there is a lot left to this story so I'm going to continue on. Thank you to everyone who is continuing to read this story despite my hiatus.
Hermione shivered as the sun dipped behind the horizon. Despite the nearing summer, when the sun disappeared the nights were still quite cool. Hermione tried her best to rub the goose pimples from here bare arms before Ron could notice. She selfishly wanted to draw out her time alone with Ron sitting here at the edge of the pond.
Hermione couldn't help but notice that their relationship, or whatever it was, seemed to have moments of clarity and promise when they were alone together but it had a habit of shattering the moment they were surrounded by others.
"You're cold," said Ron, tearing Hermione from her reverie.
"No, no I'm fine," she responded.
"We should be getting back anyway, I'm surprised they've left us alone this long," Ron said getting up and offering his hand to Hermione.
She took his hand and he pulled her up. She dusted off her dress and attempted to fix her hair although it was impossible to return it to it's sleek curls from this morning.
The two walked slowly back to the burrow as twilight blanketed the countryside. Occasionally one would allow their hand to bump into the other's, but neither of them had the courage to grab it.
As they walked in the back door they noticed a somber party was taking place. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had already gone upstairs but everyone else from the funeral remained downing firewiskey and butterbeer, and occasionally venturing a story about Fred.
" 'sabout time you two show up," George slurred upon their entrance. "Shame on you for sneaking off for a snog in the middle of your brother's funeral," George scolded in a half hearted manner. Hermione blushed furiously and Ron opened his mouth to protest before promptly shutting it.
George had wrapped an arm around each of them and guided them to the kitchen table which was littered with empty alcohol bottles and a few remaining full bottles. He poured three generous glasses of firewhiskey and handed one to each of them, keeping one to himself.
He raised his glass and said "Cheers," before downing his in one large gulp. Ron followed suit with a small grimace after swallowing. Hermione looked skeptically at her glass.
"Well go on Granger, McGonagall isn't here to take any house points," George said sharply. Hermione looked to Ron, who only shrugged. Hermione, feeling hurt by both George's biting remark and Ron's seeming indifference, drank her glass and grimaced at the burning sensation in her stomach.
"Atta girl!" George exclaimed without sound cheerful about it at all.
He refilled their glasses again, and again he and Ron finished them in one gulp. However this time George seemed to accept Hermione taking a small sip before stumbling off to join Lee and Angelina who both seemed as gone as George with exploding snap cards pressed to their foreheads.
"Sorry about that," Ron mumbled when George was out of earshot. "Its just the first time I've talked to him since…" he trailed off.
"Its fine, I understand" said Hermione watching skeptically as Ron poured himself another firewhiskey.
Hermione looked around at everyone else in the Burrow. Ginny was in an argument with Bill and Charlie about whether or not she should be drinking. All three were quite red face which indicated that they had already had quite a bit to drink, so the argument was moot.
Harry and Katie Bell were sitting together watching as Oliver gesticulating wildly in front of him obviously acting out some amazing Quidditch save. Hermione noticed Ron had wandered over to join them.
Hermione was not in the mood for Quidditch talk so she turned towards the couch where Ginny was now sulking and nursing a pumpkin juice.
"Mind if I sit?" Hermione asked.
Ginny indicated it was fine. "They're such idiots, I mean I'm of age now. They can't keep treating me like their baby sister," she grumbled.
"You'll always be their baby sister," Hermione said. "Besides I imagine its hard for them," she continued indicating Bill and Charlie, "Fred was their baby brother, after all. They probably felt like they should have been protecting him too."
"Yeah," Ginny responded. The two sat in silence, Hermione sipped the drink in her hand simply for something to do.
Eventually Ginny asked, "So where were you and my brother all day?"
"We were sitting by the pond."
Ginny nodded as if she had already guessed as much. "What's the deal with you two anyway?"
Hermione shrugged.
"Well have you talked about it?" Ginny pressed.
"Yes and no," Hermione hedged. "Its so hard right now, I really just need my best friend right now not a boyfriend."
"He could be both."
"Maybe," Hermione said, but she wasn't really sure if she meant it. It was so hard to tell if everything that had happened was genuine or a desperate attempt to feel something other than misery.
Ginny hugged Hermione and suggested they go watch the game of exploding snap.
The rest of the night was almost pleasant, everyone talking and playing drinking games, however the overtone of grief was always there. By two in the morning everyone but George and Ron had switched from firewhiskey to butterbeer or pumpkin juice. Charlie had gone upstairs to bed and Bill had fallen asleep on the couch. Katie and Angelina had made arangements to sleep on Ginny's floor, Lee and Oliver were planning on sleeping in George's room. Slowly people began drifting off to bed.
George would complain every time another person went upstairs, in an attempt to avoid being alone.
"Wanna go ta bed 'Mione?" Ron slurred at about 2:30. Hermione flushed as there were still several people in the living room, she was also shocked because this was the first thing Ron had said to her all night.
She nodded and got up, Ron stumbled after her, well into her actually. Hermione wrapped his arm around his waist and supported most of his weight as she led him upstairs. Jeers and laughter followed them. The pair stumbled up to Ron's attic room.
Hermione lit the lamp by the bedside and got a good look at Ron for the first time. His face was a brighter red than she had ever seen it and his hair was a mess.
He took a step closer and wrapped his arms around her. He leaned in, his breath was hot and smelled like alcohol. His blue eyes were dark, intense and locked on hers. Despite having very little to drink that evening, Hermione was utterly intoxicated.
Ron's lips pressed onto hers and Hermione melted into him. This kiss was completely different than their previous kisses. Ron was confident and powerful, but somehow still soft and slow. His fingers were tangling themselves in her curls as his tongue explored her mouth.
Ron carefully steered her towards the bed and when the mattress hit the back of her already weak knees, they buckled. As they were falling Ron somehow managed to arrange them in a comfortable position on the bed while simultaneously avoiding crushing her.
Hermione was returning Ron's kiss with vigor. She was so wrapped up in the kiss that she didn't notice that Ron was slowly moving his hand up her thigh until he reached the fabric of her knickers. Her eyes shot open and she pushed Ron's hand away from her.
Ron looked at her bewildered. Hermione positioned herself so that she was no longer under him.
"What?" Ron asked. It came out annoyed, but that was only to cover the fact that Ron was hurt Hermione didn't want him to touch her.
"Ron, you're drunk."
"I'm not" Ron protested, although the slight slur in his voice betrayed him.
"Clearly you are and I am not going to be some slag you have sex with when you're drunk." Hermione was standing now and she felt tears pricking her eyes wondering how things had gone down hill so quickly.
"Hermione, you're not, you know you're not." Ron tried to reach out to her. She wrapped her arms around herself and backed out of his reach.
Hermione turned to leave as she opened the bedroom door, she hissed over her shoulder, "Don't follow me Ronald."
As soon as she closed the door behind her, tears started to fall. She felt so guilty for what she'd said, she knew that Ron didn't think of her that way. Truth was, she was terrified. She'd never done anything like that before. She worried what other people might think, but more importantly she was worried she wouldn't be good at it and Ron wouldn't want to be with her any more.
Ron and Lavender had been together a long time, Hermione wasn't naive enough to think snogging was all they had done. Hermione slowly made her way downstairs, she couldn't stop thinking about Ron and Lavender together and regretting that she hadn't been first.
She wiped her tears as she walking into the kitchen thinking about making a cup of tea. She stopped short when she realized someone else was already in the kitchen.
"Hey little sister," George slurred slightly when he saw her.
"Erm, its Hermione, not Ginny," Hermione said tentatively.
George laughed, "Hermione, despite what you think dropping out before taking my NEWTs doesn't make me an idiot."
Hermione looked bewildered, "Not thats not it…its just…" she stammered.
"Everyone here has thought of you and Harry as family since Ickle Ronniekins was a first year," George explained as he took another sip of the firewhiskey he had been nursing.
Hermione had never considered herself particularly close to either of the twins, in fact she had always felt they had disliked her for spoiling their fun so frequently. Hearing that George considered her a sister was enough to bring the tears back to her eyes.
"You've been crying," George said. Hermione tried to deny it. "Was it something Ron did?" George pressed.
"No, no, it was me," Hermione insisted.
George looked at her skeptically.
"Well I better go," Hermione said as she began to back out of the kitchen.
"Before you go, he loves you, even if he's too big of an idiot to let you know it," George said finishing his drink.
Hermione slowly made her way upstairs dreading confronting Ron.
When she went into his room, Ron was sitting on his bed. When he saw her he jumped up. Hermione noticed he had put on pajamas and brushed his hair. He also seemed to have sobered up considerably.
"Hermione I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to…obviously you wouldn't want to…you're just so beautiful, I could't help…not that that is an excuse at all," Ron said talking a million miles a minute.
"No, I overreacted." Hermione mumbled.
"No you didn't, I was an idiot, a drunk idiot. I'm never drinking again. Hermione, I'm supposed to be taking care of you, not hurting you. Please forgive me."
"I already told you, you don't need to apologize," Hermione said sitting on his bed wrapping her arms around her knees. "And I do want to…just not right now."
Ron's jaw dropped. Hermione Granger just said she wanted to…he couldn't even think the words. No way had she said that. He sat down next to her in shock.
He tried to start his next sentence several times, he kept opening his mouth but no sound came out so he closed it again. Eventually he managed to choke out, "What?"
Hermione gave him a nervous smile, "Well, I really like you and I find you, erm, attractive, but I'm not as , well, experienced as you and —"
Ron cut her off with a loud laugh. Hermione's heart sank she knew he wouldn't want to be with her when he found out she had no idea what she was doing. She was about to let an angry retort fly when Ron burted, "You dated Krum, a famous Quidditch player, you're probably the most experienced person I know!"
Hermione was furious, "I told you Viktor and I were just friends, we only kissed once, after the Yule Ball."
Ron got a look of pure joy, "What? Seriously?" he exclaimed.
Hermione was hurt by his excitement. Finally something he's smarter at than me, well thats what he's always wanted, Hermione thought bitterly.
Hermione nodded. "Yea, like I said you and Lavender have done way more and I'm just don't think I want to go as fast as you want to," she finished lamely failing to hold back her tears anymore.
"No, no, no!" Ron said wrapping Hermione up in his arms. "We never did anything, Hermione. We mostly just snogged a lot and she let me touch her, erm, chest over her jumper once, but it was just weird because I didn't even like her like that. I swear, thats all we did."
"Really?" Hermione asked in disbelief.
"Cross my heart, even then I only had eyes for you." Ron said drawing an X over his chest.
Hermione began sobbing with a renewed vigor.
"What did I do now?" Ron asked helplessly trying to comfort her.
Hermione gave a tear-y laugh, "Nothing I've just been so worried you wouldn't want to be with me when you found out I had no idea what I was doing…well other than the scientific stuff."
Now it was Ron's turn to laugh, " I was worried about the same thing, thats basically why I started dating Lavender to begin with because I thought you and Krum had…well, anyway. I couldn't do it. I just wanted it to be with you even if I died a virgin."
"Oh don't be so dramatic Ronald," Hermione joked.
"Well it was a very real possibility wasn't it," Ron retorted.
"Yeah, I guess it was." Hermione said.
"Not that its an excuse, but that's part of the reason I got a little carried away tonight. I was just so excited you seemed to want me, and well…I guess there were a lot of emotions involved…and alcohol. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'll wait as long as you want. We can even wait until we're married if you want to."
Hermione's heart skipped at the mention of marriage, "I don't know if I want to wait that long," Hermione said thoughtfully, "But I just want to be sure we're doing it because we really care about each other and want to be together not because we're trying to stop feeling miserable about the war and Fred. You know?"
"Yeah, I absolutely understand." Ron didn't bother to tell her that he was sure now he really cared about her.
They sat quietly for a while. "Um Hermione," Ron began "Do you mind if I kiss you?"
Hermione shook her head. Ron leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips. After he pulled away Hermione curled into Ron's side and he held her close.
Both were content in the fact that whenever it did happen, the other would be the only one.
AN: I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a review, I hope to have the next chapter up much sooner.