A/N: Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, and to everyone who has favorited and/or followed this story! Thank you also to my wonderful beta reader, Rosalie. This is a very short chapter to fill you in a bit on Christina and Uriah and on activities in the city.

Chapter 40: Christina – Memorial

The memorial consists of a gray stone wall, shaped like a broken circle, sitting in the middle of a park. It feels like an appropriate symbol for the war that ripped through the heart of our city, tearing our factions and lives apart.

Names are carved on both sides of it, for all those who died in the war – the Abnegation, Candor, and loyal Dauntless on the outside, and the others on the inside. Only the Dauntless and Erudite leaders, and those who were executed for war crimes, are excluded.

It shows the two sides of the Chicago Civil War.

The city council asked Four and Tris to speak today, at the memorial's opening ceremony. They were the logical choices, given the active roles they served throughout the war, but I don't blame them for declining.

Tris lost too much in that struggle to be willing to discuss it in front of a crowd, and Four has the same demons that the rest of us do – those of us who were under the simulation, anyway. We have to live with the memory of what our bodies did without our permission.

I suppose I was relatively lucky in that regard, not that I'd ever use that word for anything related to that horrible day. The program made me herd a group of scared kids into a building, shutting them into a room and guarding them at gunpoint. Sometimes, their terrified faces still haunt my nightmares, but at least I didn't kill anyone.

On the flip side, that's probably why it was so hard for me to believe that Tris really had to shoot Will. I dearly wanted to believe that the simulation couldn't have made me kill an innocent person, and that I would have woken up if it had ordered me to do that. And that in turn made me assume that Will couldn't have done it, either – that he couldn't have posed a serious threat to Tris.

It wasn't until I watched Marlene step off the roof that I knew I was wrong.

My gaze turns to Uriah, watching where he stands next to her name. He runs his fingers lightly over it as tears course down his face. He loves me, and I know it, but he still mourns her the same way I mourn Will. It's impossible not to wonder, sometimes, what our lives would be like if they had lived.

Cara is by her brother's name now, and I wait, giving her time to grieve before I take my turn at that spot. Tris will undoubtedly want the same chance before we leave, though she's currently by her parents' names. I watch as Four rocks her gently back and forth, her face buried against his chest as his chin rests on her head. His eyes are closed, but there's no hiding the guilt that still torments him. I don't know if he's remembering the way he fought her in the Dauntless control room, or is feeling our collective failure to save the Abnegation, but he's obviously not over that day any more than the rest of us are.

Uriah slowly walks toward me, having apparently finished his silent communication with Marlene for now. He gives me a sad half-smile before wrapping his arms around me and leaning into my warmth. I return the embrace tightly.

"You never told me what you did during the simulation," I say quietly against his shoulder. It's not an easy topic, but I grew up believing that it's important to reveal our secrets, and this feels like the time to discuss his. Besides, I have to admit I'm a bit curious. He's Divergent, so he must have been awake, and I don't know if that made everything harder or easier.

He doesn't answer at first – for long enough that I begin to wonder if I've pushed his boundaries too far. But he finally responds, his voice strained.

"I watched." A shiver runs through him. "I'd like to say I resisted, the way Four and Tris did, but it was all so overwhelming. I felt like I was the only one awake, surrounded by thousands of people who would kill me if they realized it. And I guess I wasn't smart enough to come up with a plan." He gives a self-deprecating shrug. "So, I just pretended to be under the simulation, and I…watched."

We pull apart far enough for me to see his face, and my heart hurts at the pain and guilt I see there. "It was horrible," he whispers, looking away from me and shaking his head sadly. His gaze passes over the others before pausing on his brother, who has his arms pressed against the wall, his face buried in them.

"I saw Zeke shoot a woman." His voice catches, and he closes his eyes. "She was maybe forty. All in gray. I don't think she was a leader or anything, but she tried to shield an old man, and I guess that was enough for the simulation to decide she was an enemy."

Fresh tears make their way down his cheeks, and I wrap my arms around him again, holding him tightly against the memory.

"You couldn't have stopped it," I reassure him. "None of us could."

"Yeah, I know." But his voice is tight, and it's obvious he doesn't really believe me. "It's just…. I was awake. It seems like I should have at least tried."

I shake my head, letting him feel the motion as words fail me. That's a rare thing for someone from Candor.

"We never even figured out who she was," he adds after a moment. And I think about how hard that would be, on top of everything else. To not even be able to find her name on the wall and apologize to her. To say a prayer for her forgiveness.

"I'm so sorry, Uri," I whisper.

He nods a little, rubbing a hand up and down my back. An odd, strangled laugh comes out of him as he says, "The funny thing is that I was mad at you afterwards."

That makes me pull back – enough to see his expression, and to see that he's serious. "What? Why?"

"Because of how you treated Tris." He sounds somewhat apologetic, but he continues anyway. "She stopped the simulation, and every time I looked at her, I thought about how many lives she saved. And every time I heard you muttering behind her back, I thought of that woman dying on the street, and it pissed me off."

The words make every muscle in my body lock in place, and I just stare at my boyfriend, appalled. He's right. How did I never see that before? I focused entirely on Will's death, and on finally forgiving Tris for that, but I never once thought to thank her for what she did. For all I know, I would have killed someone myself if she hadn't stopped the simulation first.

"Oh, my God…" I whisper, my hands rising to my mouth on their own as my breathing turns quick and shallow. What kind of terrible friend am I?

"Hey," he says softly, reaching to take my hands again, pulling them away from my face and squeezing them. "I didn't mean it like that. None of us were exactly at our best, then." He tries to smile, without success. "I stopped being mad at you a long time ago, and I'm sure Tris did, too, if she was ever even mad at all. I just…. I wanted you to understand why it took me so long to notice you…that way. To fall in love with you."

His lips finally manage to lift as he adds more playfully, "But now, you're my favorite person, you know."

The words draw a reluctant smile from me, despite all the grim memories and realizations this day has brought. But I suppose that's the point of a memorial – to remember and forgive and learn – even when it's not easy.

"You're my favorite, too," I murmur, giving him a light kiss before turning my attention back to our faction-mates and to the names on the wall. Uriah may be the most important person in my life right now, but the others matter, too – those who are here in person and those who are only left in spirit. They're all part of who I am, and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

A/N: I know this was very short, but please take a moment to review anyway. Also, I'm thinking about changing the story summary, so if you have any ideas for that, please let me know. Basically, I'm thinking that people aren't quite realizing that this story is primarily about Tris and Tobias, so I want to change the emphasis to be on them a little more.

This story has been receiving a good number of reviews, thanks to all of you wonderful, loyal readers, but it has a lot fewer views, favorites, and followers than my other stories do, and that makes me suspect that the description isn't attracting new readers. (Or maybe they're not getting past the angst in the first set of chapters...) Anyway, I'd appreciate any suggestions. Thanks again!