Moonlit Wishes
Book III, Part XVIII

Sometime during the middle of the night after I must have fallen asleep, I feel something or rather more importantly someone stir beside me, murmuring soft words that bring me out of my slumber. It's completely dark in the room and for a moment I tense up because it has been ages since I've had someone else in the bed with me.

I can't imagine who would be here with me and then the realization hits me when I look at the visage of her, the woman I have loved, the one I could never quite attain no matter how hard I tried is here, with me. I must be dreaming again,

But it feels real and she feels real, snuggling her backside up to me, so for once I may not be losing my mind and she finally decided she wanted to be with me. I shift slightly which brings my lips close to one of her ears and decide to tell her the thing I've been most terrified of uttering aloud since I departed from Salem months ago after pouring out my heart and soul to her in letters since I couldn't tell her my most innermost thoughts to her face.

"I love you too," I whisper so quietly I can barely hear the words myself, but somehow my musings must have reached her even in her sleep because she turns, which makes her face to face to me and her eyes flutter open and I see she is trying to acclimate herself to her surroundings also.

"I was wondering if you were going to tell me that you loved me after my confession of love for you." Her words seem to be on the border of teasing me, yet there's a note of insecurity that somehow rings out, an emotion I'm all too well aware of since it has resided in me constantly concerning this woman.

I guess she might have been pretending to be asleep for a while wondering when and if I would wake up and now I've gone and told her the one thing I had sworn to myself I wasn't going to say, but it's true I do love her, never stopped loving her even though I tried to convince myself otherwise.

"I thought you were asleep," I admit deciding honesty may be the best policy this go round even though there are things I need to ask her that she probably will not want to hear or rather face, because I know this woman, once she has made her mind up about something she will do whatever it takes to get what she wants.

"I was for a while, but then when I was about to turn over, I felt something mysteriously hard against me," she begins in all seriousness, but I know better. Samantha has probably heard enough double entendres from me to last her a lifetime and she is trying to give me a dose of my own medicine.

Better to head this off before we venture into a place I won't be able to extricate myself from because while it is very true, I really want to wait before we take things too far. We're both creatures of wanting too much too soon and for once I want to do things differently.

"Samantha," I began, trying my best to think of how to say what I need to say without scaring her away, but we've come this far and I refuse to back down from what I need from her this time around.

"EJ," she counters back, trying her best not to bust out into a giggle, but she fails and her merry laughter starts to fill the darkened room.

Who knew Samantha Brady was a giggler? Not me, or rather I haven't seen this side of her in such a very long time that it takes me by surprise. I believe I am starting to get visions of my long lost friend whom I could make laugh, one that has been gone for so long that it takes a minute for it to truly register with me.

She stops and starts to look a bit worried instead, "EJ is something wrong? I was just trying to joke with you about you know being…"

I place a finger on her lips before she can say more. I need to get this out before I lose my courage to do what I need to do to finally make things right and totally truthful with us so that Samantha fully understands where I am coming from with this line of thinking.

"I need to ask you something," I begin, only to become flustered when she starts to kiss my finger. I quickly move it away from her lips only to feel her hand snake up behind my head, drawing me down for a kiss.

Her lips are so sweet and I want to kiss her, I really do, but I have to stop her before she gets to that aforementioned hardness and it takes control of the situation instead of allowing me to talk to her.

I pull away and she gives me a wary look so before I can give her a full blown complex I just blurt it out, "I want us to wait."

"Wait as in wait to have sex?"

"Wait as in wait before we make love," I reply, which makes her smile in the darkness, and I realize I've scored some good points with her for stating the difference.

"EJ, I know you don't feel well…"

"Samantha, it's not that, I'm feeling better…"

"Then let's celebrate with an early Christmas present," she suggests and starts to pull me back down to her, but I resist even though it's getting more difficult with each passing minute that I'm lying next to her in my bed. She's almost got me down to her lips again, but I stop.

"Wait, I need to ask you something."

"You know I'm not on the pill."

"We've already clarified that earlier tonight."

"I know you don't have any condoms."

"Right again," I answer only to feel her tug on me and I topple on top of her momentarily.

"Stop," I push up on my arm, separating us by a few inches, looking down at her and by now she looks totally confused.

"We've both told each other we love each other. I heard you, you can't take it back even if you thought I was asleep," Samantha begins to argue with me and it reminds me so much of our children I want to laugh out loud, but she's got to let me get this out in the open for once and for all.

"I do love you," I say and her frown turns into another smile and then back into a frown as if she is trying to figure out what in the hell I am trying to convey to her.

"Then what is it EJ? We've admitted we love each other; we're both consenting adults, so what gives? The kids will be up soon and it would be really awesome to…"

"I want us to be married before we, well you know…"

"And here I thought I was the only one who had trouble talking about sex sometimes," she begins and then stops herself as it dawns on her what I've just said to her. Her eyes grow wider and she sits up and reaches over to turn on the lamp on the night stand by the bed. After we're both sitting up facing one another where we can see each other better she seems to have lost her current train of thought or rather action she was wanting from me.

Well I've gotten her speechless which is a rarity because Samantha Gene Brady can usually reply with a comeback for me no matter what situation occurs between us.

"EJ, did I hear you say you wanted us to get married or am I just imagining things?"

I pause for a second, gathering up another bit of courage because frankly I'm about as scared as I've ever been in my life because if she turns me down this time that I propose to her it will crush me.

"Samantha, will you marry me? I want us to be together forever, I want our children not to be confused because if they catch us in the same bedroom, not to mention the same bed you know it's going to make them wonder what is going on and we need to be sure this is what we want to do before we take things any further. You telling me you love me is huge, I mean I never expected it, but like I've said before we deserve more than just fooling around with one another. I want you so bad, you know I do, but unless you want the same things as in us building a life together with one another as man and wife then I'm going to have to pass on the offer for us to celebrate early for Christmas."

She's gone stock still from this latest proclamation from me and then I see a tear form, then two.

God the last thing I wanted to do was make her cry, I'm such an ass, but damn it, she has to see that this is the only way for things to truly work out for us this time. We've gone past the dating stage long ago; I'm ready for the long haul with this woman.

I reach out to wipe away a tear that is starting to slip down her cheek and then the most amazing thing happens when I touch her face. She nods her head and I feel it.

Oh my god, she is going to say yes, I can feel it and then miraculously I hear it, the sweetest words she's ever uttered to me beyond admitting that she loves me.

"Yes, I'll marry you EJ. I want to marry you too."

I pull her into my arms, hugging her tightly, and kiss the top of her head, only to start laughing when she says in a muffled voice, "I'm calling Eric right now because I'm not waiting for months before we have sex."

"Make love," I correct her for the second time tonight.

"That too," she agrees, this time she succeeds in kissing me, but this time she pulls back and gets out of the bed ready to go call her brother.

I reach out to grab her hand, "Samantha it's the middle of the night."

"Semantics EJ, it's almost morning and Eric's a priest I mean it's not like we're interrupting something for him. Not like he's getting busy or anything with anyone. I mean all he's doing is probably sleeping."

"Samantha," I begin again and she cuts me off before I can say anything else.

"I get your no sex before we're married conditions, but I am a woman in need here…"

"You cannot tell your brother about this…"

"Oh yes I can, we're twins EJ," she states with a flip of her hair and then before I know it she's out the door of my bedroom muttering about where in the hell she put her cell phone.

I shake my head and start to get out of bed, because if I know Samantha, she'll be demanding that her brother get over here right now because it's an emergency.

Poor chap doesn't know what he's about to step into, then again he is Samantha's twin.

Let's just hope the kids sleep a bit longer because I definitely don't want them to accidentally hear her mother talking to her brother about needing to get married because she is ready to have sex.

I can hear her talking on her phone, "Yes Eric, it's an emergency. You've got to come over here right now. I'll explain everything when you get here."

Well one thing is for sure, life is never going to be boring around here.