AN: So, instead of tediously updating you on my life, I'm going to get on with the

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT ANYONE VAGUELY FOLLOWING THIS STORY NEEDS TO READ. So, on Friday, I will be moving away from Guildford. Normally this would not affect you, but it's a new house and, as such, has no internet. And BT are not coming out til AUGUST THE 8TH. It's like living in a third world country, it really is. (Chris Addison joke) I will try to write this at the library, but I don't know how soon or how often that'll be. Just a heads up. Don't shout at me.

Anyway, this chapter was prompted by Trakrat and, shamefully, inspired by Topgear.

I turned my head on the side.

'Seriously?'

Lestrade glared at me. 'Yes! Seriously! Those things are sharp!'

I sighed in exasperation. 'Fine.' I said, snapping my gloves on and opening the car's first aid kit. I selected a strip of gauze and a tube of saline, and advanced on the disgruntled Lestrade who sat there pathetically clutching his, for want of a better word, wound.

I sniffed haughtily, because I had banned Sherlock from the car-turned-consulting-room and there was no one else to do it. 'You do know I'm a doctor right? Doctor. Not a damn practice nurse.'

His face screwed up as I washed the, admittedly fairly impressive, head wound 'Cut the crap John. It hurt. Wasn't me anyway. It was the work experience girl.'

I smiled slyly 'Yeah Greg. Sure. You're not a hypochondriac or anything…'

He spluttered into the cup of tea said girl had just brought him 'It bloody was!'

'Why did she call me and not an ambulance?' I asked smoothly. Silence. I started counting inside my head. 1…2…3…

By the time I reached six, Greg had blurted out 'Look, there was a lot of blood and it hurt, OK?'

I grinned evilly 'So not the work experience girl?' I asked innocently.

He scowled and ground his teeth. 'No. Not the work experience girl. Me, alright?'

'That's perfectly fine Greg. Now, do you want princess plasters or ones with Thomas The Tank Engine on them?'

He snorted 'Haha. Very funny. Why are there Disney princess plasters in a police vehicle?'

I shrugged 'Anderson?'

Luckily he grinned, instead of punching me, like he'd threatened to do a minute ago.

As I closed the lid of the first aid kit, I nonchalantly turned and said 'I'm actually surprised we haven't had the full force of Mycroft down on us yet.'

Greg smiled sheepishly and blushed slightly 'Don't worry. He'll be here soon enough.'

The sound of a furious argument floated through the door and he grimaced 'Or in fact, he could be here right now.'

I laughed 'I'll get Sherlock and get out of your hair then.'

He nodded his thanks and I clambered out the car. As we slowly wandered over to the warring brothers, Mycroft looked up, noticed us and began to walk briskly towards Greg.

'What did you do Gregory?' he asked smartly, staring at the (thankfully plain) plaster on Greg's temple.

Greg grinned uneasily. 'Well, you know they're filming an episode of Brit Cops here?'

'Yeeeees?' we all said

'Well… they put cameras in all the cars and those things are sharp…'

I began smiling involuntarily. This was going to be so damn good…

'Well, they're in such a place that if you bend over, you hit your head on them. And those bloody things are sharp.' He said, in defence presumably. 'But it's all fine.' He said quickly, looking nervously in Mycroft's direction. 'I asked th producer not to put it in, and he promised he wouldn't.'

As he walked away, presumably to avoid Sherlock's laughter, which had actually driven him to tears, I muttered 'Yeah, sure. They'll cut out the most televisually entertaining part of the broadcast…'

Sherlock wiped his eyes and managed to choke out 'He could sue them if they don't. They will.'

I grinned evilly, yet again 'I know. That's why I got it on tape.' Sherlock gaped at the black tape in my hand, before slowly smiling, looping his arms around my waist and pulling me in. 'You are evil!' he said huskily.

I smiled. 'I know. You seem to have taught me that life is much more fun that way.'

He raised both his eyebrows cheekily 'Piece of cake.'

AN: hehe… Don't ask me. I seriously don't know. Please review. And also prompt. To make me feel wanted. Please? I will try and get to an internet connection as soon as is humanly possible. I absolutely promise.