Chapter 89

Blame

Joshua tapped his fingers on the table, lightly sucking on a straw. He was facing Nick, both sitting outside of the restaurant in the soaking wet, but neither really cared. The sound of the rain gave them a degree of secrecy. It wasn't only Nick though, Derrick sat on one side, leaning back in his chair, while Grace sat hunched forward opposite him so they were surrounding the table. After having gone back home, Grace had changed into something more suitable for the weather, but even with the heavy coat wrapped around her she was shivering.

"So Richard is gone, huh." Joshua said, finally taking the straw from his mouth and putting it back into the glass of coke.

"Yeah…" Nick nodded. He looked down at the table; lightly stirring his coffee although he hadn't drank any of it yet. "I'll be honest Joshua… I thought… I thought you were too."

"That's understandable."

"I mean you disappeared too! With Lisa… I mean…" Nick just shook his head. "Who knows what could have happened."

"On the semi-bright side, I couldn't have killed myself even if I wanted." Joshua grinned. "Death doesn't allow us that luxury. We die by his terms."

"Until we defeat him." Nick pointed out. He paused again, thinking back to Myers. Closing his eyes, he knew he wasn't going to like the response. "Look, Joshua… I've… got something to say… you're not going to like it but…"

He killed Miles. Joshua isn't going to take it well if he knows Myers is alive. Hell, he'll probably kill him again. He isn't ready, he can't know Myers is alive yet. Joshua simply could not handle that.

Nick trailed off and didn't continue.

"What am I not going to like?" Joshua pressed, but Nick didn't say a thing.

"Look at him, being all nervous. He's like a goddamn schoolboy." Derrick suddenly interrupted. "Basically, what he wants to say is that he was worried about you and that he cares for you as a friend."

Nick blinked in surprise but Derrick's face was unreadable.

"Why would I not like that?" Joshua cocked his head, confused.

"Because he's a nervous idiot who doesn't want to seem less manly." Derrick crossed his arms. "Anyway, getting that out of the way, where the hell did you go."

"Me?"

"Yes, you." Derrick peered down at Joshua. "You up and left that Chloe chick and her boyfriend when you dear old mother died. Why?"

"Why…?" Joshua's eyes widened. "Why do you think?"

Derrick slammed his fist on the table, causing everything to jump about a centimeter in the air before resting again, including Nick and Grace. "Look. As far as I understand, you're the guy who is the leader, at least the unspoken one. You're the guy who tells us what to do, the so-called… 'Chosen'. At least that's what Nick says and I'm still having trouble believing it. But if you are the leader, then you more than anyone need to get over your grief and start working on solutions."

"…The hell…?" Joshua face twisted. "Who… who are you to tell me-"

"I am one of the many people trusting out lives with you!" Derrick interrupted. "My sister and I may be new to all this, but we know enough that our lives are in your hands. While it completely and utterly sucks that your mother died, that your brother died, that's two people in my eyes. You've got about seven more people still living, still needing your guidance. That's who I think I am. A survivor who likely wouldn't last a week if we don't get a solid leader."

Joshua grinned lightly after this, sitting loosely in his chair. "That was a nice speech, Derrick. I would have appreciated it before I had actually come to terms with all. I already know that, okay? I know that we still got people living and I have promised…" Joshua paused and looked at Nick. "…I have tried my best to make sure that I am well enough to save you all. And I will try, trust me. My life goes before you all, because you all have a better life out there than me."

"Huh." Derrick just crossed his arms. "I just wanted to make the playing field clear."

"It is." Joshua suddenly stood up. "I need to go to the men's room. Be right back." Joshua left for the restaurant, leaving the other three alone. After a second, Derrick turned to Lukas.

"So." Derrick said, his face questioning.

"…so?"

"So why in the name of all hell aren't you telling him about Myers. That guy, as fucked up as he is, knows how to beat Death, right?"

"Yes but…" Nick took a breath. "It looks like Joshua has a plan."

"So? Maybe he'll think this Myer's fella has a good one too."

"He won't." Nick sighed. "Look, Derrick… I need… time until I tell Joshua. Myers killed his brother, gave him an impossible choice. I killed Myers… shot him in the head. Knowing that he has come back… knowing that what I showed to two small girls is now defunct… I just need time before I can allow myself to find him again, okay?"

"Sure. But what if Joshua's plan works?" Derrick sniffed. "What are you gonna do with Myers then? He'll be alive, but according to you he's… evil…"

"I…" To be honest, Nick hadn't thought about this. "I don't know. I guess turn him in to the authorities but…" Nick trailed off again.

"Huh." Derrick just shook his head and leant back on his chair. "As long as you do the right thing."

"He will." Grace piped up. Derrick regarded her with a small smile.

"How do we know that?"

"He's a policeman, Der. They always do the right thing."

"There are such things as corrupt policemen Gracie."

"Well Nicki isn't!"

"…Nicki?" Nick put in, stopping Derrick's response.

"A nickname." Grace simply said as if it were the most casual thing in the world. "You are my friend. You get a nickname."

"Ah… uh… okay…" Nick nodded, brushing the back of his head nervously.

"You've only just met him, Gracie. He can't be your friend yet."

"Why not Der? He's a good guy and he's helping us. I want him as a friend." Grace crossed her arms with a small pout.

"Fair enough…" Derrick put his hands up in defeat. "Fair enough."

"Okay, sorry about that guys." Sitting back down in his seat, Joshua let out a loud yawn before tapping the table again. "The others should be meeting us here later." Joshua allowed a smile. "Don't worry guys. This'll all be over soon, trust me."

"Why?"

Nick didn't even realize he had said it until all three looked at him. He winced internally before spreading his fingers out on the table. "Not to say that… that we shouldn't trust you, of course but… I have been thinking about… what the others said about how… how it's possible the imitator wasn't found. You weren't there when we discussed it, but it… kind of makes sense. When Myers died, Death didn't stop, so one of our theories was… was the imitator was still alive. That is was either L-Lisa or you. And with Lisa… Lisa gone…" Nick paused, not entirely sure why he was spilling his inner thoughts out. The last thing he wanted to do was cause a conflict.

"So… you think I'm the imitator…" Joshua asked, his face blank.

"No, I think you could be… But it's just a theory so…"

Joshua suddenly burst out laughing, interrupting Nick. "Oh boy, that has just cheered me up even more! Me, the imitator? That is far too funny Nick, far too funny…" Joshua stopping laughing as quickly as he started and slammed his hand on the table. "Do you think that I killed my brother? That I killed Lisa? Because if what you are saying is true, that I am the imitator, then I killed those I loved. Do you really think I would do that? Nick… do you really think that?" Joshua narrowed his eyes. "Do you think that you would even be alive if I were the culprit? You're smart. I'd want to eliminate you as soon as possible. Do you think I protected Chloe and Jeremy just for kicks? That I saved Lukas from the hotel just for laughs? That… Myers is the good guy?"

"I-"

"Did you kill an innocent man, Nick? In front of his daughters and his wife? Did you screw up their lives forever?" Joshua said in a low voice, so threatening that even Derrick drew back slightly. Nick didn't say a word, his eyes unable to stop looking at Joshua's own. "Don't you dare suggest that I am the bad guy here. I've lost far too much for you people. And I am willing to do so much more. I will put my body, my life, my very soul on the line for you people, to ensure your survival. This isn't about any kind of imitator this time, Nick. Myers is gone for good. This situation is simply Death screwing with us all. He does not want any witnesses. I cannot contact him so I can only assume this is the case." Joshua breathed out and leant back in his chair. "If you feel that I am the bad guy… then leave."

Nick looked to his feet, ashamed. "I'm sorry… I just…"

"Once again, the stress of this situation comes to a head." Joshua shook his head and sighed. "Do not be sorry, Nick. It is good to let your feelings out sometimes." A grin flashing back onto his face, Joshua glanced at Derrick. "And sometimes it's best to… keep them reigned in. I hear you gave Richard's nose a make-over."

"…Doesn't matter now." Derrick grunted.

"Nope. He's dead, it doesn't matter now. One of the many who have died… because of me?" Joshua glared at Nick. "I think not." With that comment, Joshua leant back in wait of the previously contacted survivors.

A/N: Thanks to PrincezzShell101 for your reviews! I feel so reluctant to post up chapters now-a-days because I know that the end is nigh and I simply don't want this to. But alas, all stories must and shall end. Eleven more to go!

'Till next time!