Title: The Lucky Ones
Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes & Loki
Captain America/Thor crossover, though it takes place during the Captain America timeline, so before the events in Thor. We'll get to those at some point.
Rated M for slash
A/N - Long time reader, first time writer. I don't own the characters, just the plot.
-The Lucky Ones- Chapter 8
Bucky opened his eyes to see familiar stars above his head. He must have been unconscious or asleep, because it took him a few seconds to remember what had happened. Groaning and with almost every muscle protesting, he stood up and stretched himself. He glanced back up to the sky, still in awe over the trip he had just taken. Actual space travel, he mused. Who would have thought? As he gazed up, the image of green eyes closing and Loki throwing his head back in ecstasy flittered through his head. Bucky quickly willed the thoughts away. He was in the middle of nowhere and he couldn't afford to have a breakdown here. He needed to figure out where he was and how to get back home.
It was dark, but he could tell he was in a desert somewhere. Low mountains darkened the horizon, and in the light of the crescent moon, he could see only rocks and small shrubs around. Listening carefully, Bucky could detect the sounds of what he believed to be cars on a road. He took off in that direction was eventually rewarded with the sight of a nearly empty highway. He walked along the side of the road, sticking his thumb out whenever a car drove by. Hitchhiking probably wasn't the smartest thing, but he figured he didn't have much choice. It wasn't until a young couple stopped and picked him up, looking at him curiously, that Bucky realized he was still wearing the tunic and loose pants that were given to him on Asgard. The clothes that reminded him of where he had been. Bucky didn't say much, and driver and his wife were quiet but polite. They told him that he was in New Mexico, of all places. With little to see out the dark windows and the couple being too nervous to make conversation, Bucky found himself drifting off to sleep.
It took him more than a few days, but he eventually ended up at the doorstep of a small house outside New York City. His younger sister's house. Really the only home he had to go back to. Rebecca Barnes had married young, but Adrian treated her well and Bucky respected him. Both Becky and her husband worked for the government, though what exactly they did Bucky didn't know. Now, standing on her porch, Bucky straightened his clothes and ran his fingers through his hair. The strangers that he had met were extremely generous, but Bucky knew he looked a mess. He only hoped his little sister would forgive him for showing up like this.
Luckily, when the door opened, Rebecca Barnes cared little for how her big brother looked. She threw her arms around him and cried, relieved that he was back. After all, she hadn't seen him in months, since he first shipped out to the army. It was remarkable how much the two siblings looked alike, with their wavy brown hair and blue eyes. Though where Bucky was masculine and had a roughness to his good looks, Becky and beautiful with delicate features.
"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" she said, looking up at Bucky with tear-stained eyes.
"I would say the same about you, Sis," he replied with a weary grin.
The two siblings went into the house, Becky leading her brother to the kitchen to get him some coffee. It was a modest house, furnished with items chosen more for comfort than for showiness.
"Would you mind if I used your shower? I feel like I'm covered in two years worth of living," he asked while the coffee brewed.
"Of course! You know where it is. I'll go get something from Adrian's closest and lay it out in the guest room for you to change into." Becky replied. Her husband was at work, but she knew he wouldn't mind loaning Bucky some clothes. They were about the same size.
"Thanks, sis," Bucky gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and went to get cleaned up. He managed to hold himself together while he removed the clothes he had worn with Loki. Bucky folded them carefully, so unlike the last time he had removed them, when they had been strewn across the floor in the heat of passion. Still, Bucky did not let himself think on that. However, once the steaming hot water hit his skin, he knew he was in trouble. All the memories he had held back for so many days came rushing back to him. Loki. Loki's face. Loki's laugh. Loki's soft moans as Bucky moved inside him. He would never see him, never hear him again. The weariness he felt deep in his bones made him powerless to stave off the onslaught of emotion, and he dropped to his knees under the pelting water and cried.
Bucky didn't know how long he stayed there, but the cooling of the water brought him out of his grief. He cleaned himself quickly, before the water turned completely cold and got out. Wrapping himself in a towel, he went to the guest room and dressed in the clothes his sister had left. His old clothes, the only physical reminder Bucky had of his time on Asgard, were placed on the dresser. He was not ready to decide what to do with them yet. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and saw how awful he looked. He needed a shave, but that would have to wait until he could trust himself to hold a razor steady. His eyes revealed the worst of it though. They were rimmed in red, swollen from the crying, and Bucky could see the haunting despair showing through so easily. He wasn't sure how much he should tell his sister, but he knew there was little he could hide from her.
Finally, knowing he couldn't stay hidden in the room forever, Bucky found his way back to the kitchen. Becky sat at the table, two steaming mugs on the table before her. She glanced up at him when he walked in, her curious expression turning to one of concern as he took the chair across from her.
"Bucky, what happened?" she asked, reaching across to squeeze her brother's hand.
"There's so much, Sis. So much has happened," Bucky started. "I don't even know where to begin."
"Tell me what has you so upset right now."
Bucky took his hand out of his sister's grasp and ran it across his face.
"I met somebody." he silently chided himself over just how trite that sounded.
"That should be happy news, Bucky."
"I had to say goodbye," Bucky took a deep breath before adding, "I'll never get to see him again."
His sister looked at him for a few seconds, saying nothing. Had she noticed the gender he mentioned?
"Why can't you see him again?" she said, finally. Bucky stared, waiting for her to say something else. Something about the fact it was a "him," but she said nothing.
"I love you, sis, I really do." he said with the most sincere smile he'd given anyone since...well, since Loki.
"You better!" Becky laughed. "Now tell me about this man who has you so heartbroken."
Bucky told his sister as much as he could, without giving away the more unbelievable details of his past few days. He also told her a bit of what had happened in Germany, with Steve. He left out the part about the experiments, and the fall. He didn't want to worry Becky. He fabricated a story about meeting Loki in a German bar, and being sent home by the Army without him.
"I had no idea what was going on over there, I haven't heard anything in months, not since after Steve left. Has Steve come back as well?" Becky asked.
"I'm not sure. I haven't seen him in a few days. I'd guess no. He was pretty busy over there, doing Captain America stuff, you know." Bucky desperately wished he could find out what had happened to Steve and the other guys he had been with. Did they ever capture Schmidt? However, he wasn't ready to approach the army yet. He needed have a few days to get his head together first. Besides, Steve didn't need him really. Not with all his Captain America stuff. All Bucky had done was get in the way, and get himself thrown from a train.
"So tell me about this guy! Loki, huh? Is that a German name?" Becky's question roused her brother from his thoughts.
"I think it's Norse. And I don't really know what to tell you. It all happened so fast with him. But he was perfect, Becky. He was...everything." Bucky knew he was sounding like a sap, but he couldn't help it and he really didn't much care anymore.
"I didn't know you were attracted to boys. I mean, it doesn't make a difference to me. It's just a surprise is all. You were always a ladies man."
"I didn't know either!" Bucky sat back and ran a hand through his hair. "I'd never really considered it before. But when I met Loki, that all changed."
Bucky told his sister everything he could about Loki. Obviously, he kept the intimate details out, as well as the stuff about him being from a different world. Contrary to what he'd expected, talking about Loki actually lifted his spirits. Becky, being the amazing person she was, accepted everything he told her without judgement - only sisterly concern for how things worked out. After a while though, even the coffee couldn't keep Bucky awake, and he retreated to the guest room to sleep.
The bed was soft and Bucky was grateful to be sleeping somewhere other than the back of a stranger's car. He tried to ignore the stab of loneliness that shot through him as he climbed under the blankets. Putting one pillow under his head, and holding the other one clutched to his chest, Bucky fell asleep surprisingly fast.
-ooooooooooooooo-
Loki wandered around his room in good spirits for the first time in days. He'd been collecting some of his books and magical supplies just to get them ready for when he heard word from Odin. He wasn't too concerned about Odin's decision, for he had already decided to go to Midgard regardless of what he said. But it would be in his own best interest to wait for his father's permission, rather than risk breaking the rules again.
When the knock sounded at the door, Loki was deep in thought over which particular herb would be best to bring, and he called out permission without a second thought. Glancing up when he heard the door open, he saw Thor enter his room. His brother seemed surprised to have been granted access so easily after being literally shut out for days.
"Ahh, brother! So nice to see you!" Loki called out, only half jesting with his enthusiasm. He actually wanted to talk with Thor before he left.
"Loki," A hesitant smile appeared on Thor's face. "It is a nice surprise to see you in such a pleasant mood."
"I am going on a trip!" Loki grinned.
"You are? To Midgard? Father is letting you go?" Thor looked surprised, but happily so.
"He has not said so officially, but I believe he will say yes." Loki replied, turning back to his herb collection. "And if he doesn't, I will go anyway."
"I knew you would go." Thor walked over and sat down on the bench next to his brother. "I will miss you. Bucky is a good man and you will be happy with him. You deserve to be happy."
Loki glanced at his brother. Out of all the people in his life, Thor had been the one to seek him out most often. They fought, sure, but they were close. If Loki was going to truly miss anyone, it would be him.
"Thank you, brother," said Loki, sincerely.
The two brothers talked for a while. Thor helped Loki gather his things and they reminisced while they worked. Loki couldn't remember the last time he had felt this at ease with himself. It was nice, knowing the future, knowing things were going to work out. He was excited to see Bucky again, but he could wait a few more days if that's what it took.
Loki actually accompanied Thor to dinner that evening, much to the delight of Frigga, their mother. Odin was absent, Loki noticed, but no one else mentioned it, so he didn't either. That night, though he missed Bucky deeply, his mind was untroubled. Soothed by the feel of Bucky's dogtags against his chest, he fell into an easy sleep.
The next morning started abruptly when Thor came rushing into Loki's room, rousing him from sleep.
"Loki, you must rise now. Father is very ill, and he is asking for you," stated Thor as he shook Loki's shoulders.
'I am awake! Get off me, you oaf!" Loki swatted his brother's hands away in irritation. Thor's words still hadn't completely registered to him, so he sat up and blinked for a few seconds as they sank in.
"Ill? What's wrong with him?" A small spark of dread flickered in Loki's chest.
"They think he is ready for the Odin Sleep, though it is sudden this time." Thor's expression was grim. "He has asked to speak with you, and you must hurry."
Loki nodded at him and Thor took his leave, no doubt heading back to Odin's bedside like the dutiful son he was. Cursing under his breath, Loki got changed hastily. Father simply wants to give his blessing before the Sleep takes him, Loki told himself. He desperately wanted to believe it. He tried to believe it. But his hands were shaking so badly that he had a hard time fastening the belt around his waist.
Magic brought him directly to the door outside Odin's chambers. The guards there were startled by his sudden appearance, but they held their composure and allowed Loki to enter. Thor and his mother were there, as well as a few of the palace healers. Odin lay still in the bed, though he was awake and the golden glow that usually surrounded him during Odin Sleep was not present. Loki approached the bedside hesitantly. Odin still wore the patch on his face, but the other eye opened and looked up at him.
"Father," said Loki, guardedly.
"Loki, the Odin Sleep is upon me. You are to remain here in Asgard right now. Your mother and your brother need you now that I will not be here."
Loki could feel his heart rate speed up as Odin's words cut through him like a knife. "They don't need me!" he shouted. "I am going!"
"No, Loki. I have called upon the sorcerers to block magical passage to Midgard, and have ordered Heimdall to keep the bifrost closed to you. You must stay here."
Loki saw red, and then not much else. He fled from the room, knowing nothing good would come from him remaining there. He would have been charged with treason if he'd stayed, because he wanted to kill the king. More than a few innocent bystanders were pushed to the side as he stormed through the palace. Loki never would have cared before, and he certainly didn't now. It didn't take long for Loki to reach that spot he loved so much outside the palace walls. He tried, and failed, to stop himself from looking toward the bifrost. Heimdall, who could see everything, was probably watching him now, so Loki shouted a curse his direction. Then he focused on calming down. He was not about to take Odin's word for it that a magical barrier had been put in place. Barriers could be breached, and Loki was confident in his abilities. Though try as he might, Loki never managed to so much as tingle under his skin to show that his spells were working. The rage inside him flared, but it was spent already. Suddenly exhausted, he slumped back against a tree in defeat. A bitter laugh escaped from his lips. It figures, he thought. Honestly, why was he even surprised? Odin had never once taken his wishes into consideration. Thor, being the golden child, always got exactly what he wanted. Loki had always felt like he was just along for the ride. Why would this be any different? What did he expect? Happiness? Love? He'd never deserved it before, why should he think he could have it now? Bucky deserved happiness, though. And he would not find it with Loki. It would be better for him this way, being free to find a mate, maybe a wife to have children with, than to be stuck with the miserable excuse for a creature that Loki knew himself to be.
Loki could feel himself shutting down. His heart, which he had locked away for so long, which Bucky had so quickly and completely taken possession of, had already begun to close once more. Loneliness was not a stranger to Loki, and was more tolerable than pain. And solitude was his oldest and dearest friend; he could embrace it once more. This would be his life, one he already knew all about living. Giving into his apparent destiny, Loki walked calmly back into the palace.
I KNOW! It sucks having them apart, but bear with me. It's necessary for the plot! I am a firm believer in happily ever after, so we'll get there. Just be patient! Reviews are love!