Ch 3

"Where do you think he goes?" Nora asked Julie as they walked to work.

"Oh, you mean R?" Julie said.

Nora nodded, "Yeah, it's kind of weird, don't you think?"

"I'm in love with a guy who used to be a zombie. Some people would think that's a little weird."

"Not for you." Nora said. "It's sickening, but I admit it, the way he looks at you, Julie... the way you look at him..." She fluttered her eyelashes and swooned.

Julie laughs and nudged her. "Jealous."

"So, he doesn't tell you where he goes?"

"No. I don't bring the subject up. If he needs a five minute break of privacy, he can have it. He's just starting to open up to me a little about everything. He's having memories about his old life, and I don't want to push him."

"So, you don't wonder at all about where he goes."

"Nora, why is this bothering you so much..." Her voice trailed off. The light bulb clicked on, and she now knew exactly why this was bothering Nora so much. Perry would do this to her. He would sneak out early from dates. He would break them. He would leave saying he had work when he didn't. And he'd be cheating on her with Nora when he was doing it. "He's not cheating on me, Nora. R wouldn't do that."

"I'm not saying he's cheating on you. God knows the man worships the ground you walk on. I just think it's weird that he doesn't tell you."

"You don't know him like I do. Whatever he's doing, whatever it is, if it was bad, he'd tell me."

"Okay," Nora said, and bit her bottom lip.

"Come on, we're late."

…...

I walked to the back of the restaurant and saw a pair of shoes sticking out from under the sink and chuckled. It could be only be one person. Tom, a small man with a bald head and kind face heard me approach him and pushed himself out from under the sink and to his feet.

"R! Nice to see you again." He grasped my hand tightly, covering both of his with my own and I shook it firmly. This empty building had once been his shelter in the early days of the stadium before the communities were built. Small buildings like this one used to litter the street, but they had been renovated or merged into larger apothecaries and consignment shops. Tom had meant to use this shelter as a floral boutique, but since I came along and cured his wife of the epidemic, he gave the building to me as a thank you gift, and has been helping me turn it into a restaurant.

"The ceremony today was absolutely beautiful." Tom said.

"Thanks." I said. "How's it going with the sink?"

"She's almost there." He said, and got back under it. "I just need to tighten this one thing..."

I don't know if the plague heightened my hearing, or I'm just overly sensitive to it now, but I heard footsteps slowing down outside, as if someone was going to come in. Hoping it wasn't Nora spying on me, I sprung from behind the sink just as she came into view.

She looked exactly as she had in my dream; same shoulder length red hair, same emerald eyes. She took a deep breath, and walked into my building. Her eyes caught mine. Mine were full of disbelief, hers were full of want. She was an attractive young woman. She took a step forward, her eyes never leaving mine. Her mouth gently parted, and she whispered, "Ri...Riley?"

I felt my stomach doing somersaults. This couldn't be happening. This could not be happening. Not now, not when everything was going so well. She opened her mouth like she was going to ask me something, but I beat her to the punch. "Who are you?" I asked.

She put her hand to her mouth, the tears in her eyes spilling over, and she lowered her head. "You don't know me?" She asked, whispering more to her feet than at me.

A deep feeling of guilt was spreading through my entire body as I watched this poor young woman. "No. I'm sorry." I said softly. I wasn't about to get into the whole dreaming about her thing just yet.

"Riley, it's me." She said, looking up at me with those green eyes.

Riley. She called me Riley. That was twice now. Was my name Riley? I tried to imagine myself as a Riley. I couldn't picture it. Maybe this girl had mistaken me for someone else.

"Please." She pleaded. "Talk to me."

"I think you've confused me with someone else." I tell her gently.

She breaks down completely then, quiet hiccuping sobs that shake her small frame and she buries her face in her hands. I'm stumped. It's been many years since I have comforted a crying woman, and my recollection of how to do so is fuzzy. I glance down at Tom and he nods his head to me, urging me to go over to her. I sigh, knowing this is a bad idea, but having no other choice. I gather her softly in my arms and she rests her head on my shoulder.

I'm not sure how, but holding this girl is familiar somehow. Like I've done it before many years ago.

"I thought you were dead, Riley." She whispers, and then like a silent lullaby to herself, she repeats three words softly, "Oh my God."

I listen to her repetitive mantra, wondering what all of this means now, if this woman does indeed know me, when she straightens up. She dries her enchanting eyes, and looks deep into mine. Mine still have a hint of steely gray, but mostly have been changed to blue.

"Why do you keep calling me Riley?" I blurt out.

"That's your name..." She almost shouts. "Riley Allan Burke. You were named after your father, you met me while we were working in St. Louis. Doesn't this mean anything to you?"

I pull away from her, and take a step back. I rack my brain. This woman's face is there, we are holding hands, we are kissing, but this name, St. Louis... "No." I say simply, "I'm sorry, but when I changed, I lost a lot of everything. I don't remember who I was, where I lived. I was hoping it'd come back, but..."

"You saved me." She said, cutting me off. "We were working late one night when the building was overrun. You locked me in a closet. You said you'd be back for me, that you were going to try and distract them..." a sob caught in her throat, "It was the last time I saw you. I had my hands clapped over my ears so tight when I heard people being slaughtered. And then... there was nothing, and I finally came out. I looked for you, day and night for two months. I always knew in my heart that you were alive!" She threw her arms around me and pressed her lips to mine. The same memory of us kissing popped into my head, and I grabbed hold of her arms and gently pulled her off of me with a "Please."

"I'm sorry." She said, a blush growing on her cheeks. "It's just that... the whole world has been to hell and back. I've been to hell and back. Finding you has been my dandelion among this carnage."

I'm not getting through to her. I take her hand in mine. I need to get her to understand. I need her to listen to me. There's Julie now, and only Julie. So, I start off easy. "I'm sure what we had was very special."

She nodded, a smile on her face. "It was love, Riley. You'd tell me you loved me every chance you got. You'd bring me flowers for no reason at all."

I sighed. "I'm sure I did, but I have a different life now, and I'm sorry."

She hung her head, and was silent for a long time. I avoided her eyes, and listened to her slow breathing. It was rythmic, just like Julie's. "It's that blonde girl, isn't it?"

"Yes. Her name is Julie."

"I'm leaving tomorrow. I just came here because Tobey is my friend's son. You must have taken him in because you remembered him. He lead me to you, Ri. To us."

I didn't have the heart to tell her that Tobey and Emma Rae were given to me at random when I was married to a zombie girl. "Things change." I said.

"I guess they do." She said. "I'm sorry I bothered you."

I shook my head. I know what it was like finding the world in Julie, and then being devastated when she left me back at the apartment. I had to at least appologize. "I'm sorry I'm not the person I was."

She turned and headed for the door. "If you ever remember me, I'm staying in a compound in Atlanta. My name's Beth." She called over her shoulder as she left the building.

Beth. The name circled in my head.

Beth... Beth... Beth... Beth. Suddenly, my head is full of memories. The two of us carrying an oversized sofa into a house. Breakfasts in bed. Surprising her with red roses. Me getting down on one knee and offering her a ring.

Her words echo in my head. Dandelion among the carnage. My thoughts drift to my notebook. How yellow and beautiful it looked amongst the gore. How could she know about that? Am I making too much of this? Is she my wife? I can't breathe. This is happening too fast. I don't know what to do. Would I know if I'm having a heart attack? There's no pain in my arm. I'm sure I'm going to be sick. I race from the building, ignoring the shouts from Tom, and burst into my house. It's quiet and dark, and I find the lone leather couch in the living room, and gather my head in my hands. I don't love Beth. I don't. I might have before, but that was a long time ago. How am I going to explain this to Julie? Will she understand? Six words now circle my head. What am I going to do?

….

I don't know how long I sit there. Soon, I hear the rapid footsteps approaching the front door. I hear the key in the lock, and Julie's frantic voice. "R!" She screams. I want to answer her. I want to shout that I'm in here, and I'm alright, but every time the words bubble to my lips, I see Beth's eyes. Feel her lips on my own. "R!" She calls again, this time from the hallway. More footsteps, and she's in the living room. I know she sees me, because drops to her knees in front of me. I can see her lap through my fingers. She turns her head, "Nora, he's in here!"

"Oh my God." She says. I wish she wouldn't use that phrase. "Are you okay?" She asks, prying my fingers from my skull.

"What's wrong with him?" Nora asks, close by, probably in the same room.

"R, it's me, it's Julie." She says cupping my face, and her voice catches in her throat, and I know she is on the verge of tears. It's this knowledge that brings me out of my fog. To hear her in danger, or upset, it brings me back to reality. I stare at her. "Julie. I'm okay."

She breaths a sigh of relief, and throws herself at me, wrapping her arms tightly around me neck. "Oh my God, you scared me."

"I'm sorry," I say, clearing my throat, and pull her tight. I glance at Nora and her eyes are peeled.

"Why didn't you go to work?" Nora asks.

"It's a long story." I say. I look up at her, and she is leaning against the far wall.

"When you didn't show up, I thought something was wrong." Julie said, straightening up to look at me. "I've called the house phone several times, and no one answered, and no one knew where you were."

"I had a bit of a distraction today." I said. "I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to worry you."

"It's you and me, remember?" She says, and places her forehead against mine.

I breathe in her spicy scent and I do remember. I twine my fingers through hers.

"Where'd you go?" Nora asks.

"Nora, this is not an interrogation." Julie says.

"No," I say, "I have to tell you something. I... I ran into someone from my past today."

Nora squints at me, and Julie's eyes become moons. "Your mother? She's here, at the stadium?"

"No." I say.

"Then who is it?" Julie asks.

I sigh. How am I going to explain this? How am I going to tell her... I look deep into her golden eyes, and I'm home. Her love is what I want, all I want. "Remember, that I love you and I want you, okay?"

Julie is silent, and I can tell she is fearing the worst.

"There was a woman. She claims to know me. And... she claims to be my wife."