Chapter 2

It was early when I woke again, a little after six. I drowsily sauntered into the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth. Edward would arrive any minute.

Sure enough, as soon as I stepped out of the bathroom, cold arms swept me off my feet and carried me onto my bed. I giggled as gentle lips showered my face in tender kisses.

"I've missed you," his silken voice whispered.

"Me too," I replied. You have no idea.

I went a little crazy when Edward left in September— okay, a lot crazy. I stopped smiling, eating, caring— I pretty much stopped living. But now that he was back, I was completely healed. Everything was back to the way it was before he left— well, mostly everything. I acquired some nasty habits when Edward departed, and those habits haven't quite gone away yet.

"What are we doing today?" I questioned, excited to spend a day alone with Edward.

"I thought maybe we could just stay here today, since Charlie's out," he answered. "We could watch a movie, finish our homework, maybe even go to the meadow. . ." His smile morphed from happy and carefree into the mischievous, crooked grin I loved so much. "But first, let's do this," he said as his lips pressed onto mine.

His mouth was gentle, almost lazy as it touched my skin. I, as usual, wanted a to deepen the kiss. My fingers tugged his hair, securing his face to mine. He pulled me closer to his chest, and his cold tongue traced my bottom lip. My hands crawled under his shirt, feeling the tight muscles on his abdomen. With a groan, he pulled away. His eyes were far off and lustful. I imagined I had the same expression.

Without another word, he scooped me into his arms and carried me to the little table in the kitchen. He set me in my usual spot, and busied himself with making me breakfast.

I stood up. "Edward, you don't have to make me breakfast. I'm not even hungry."

"I want to, I like cooking for you," he responded, throwing me a smile. He pranced towards me, placed his hands on my shoulders, and guided me back into my seat.

"Really, Edward, don't bother. I'm not hungry." I tried to get up again, but he his marble hands restrained me to the chair.

"Bella. . ." He groaned. I knew his voice well enough to identify the slight edge to it. The sharpness in his tone indicated that he was going to bring IT back up again— that time when he left. He talked about IT quite a bit— more often than I wished he would. I tried to ignore what happened, but he confronted the truth.

"Bella, please?" His eyes closed, and his face scrunched in pain. "I have. . . I have noticed that you lost weight since I left, and it— it scares me. You're beautiful, so beautiful. . .I just don't want you to harm your body. Please, Bella. . .please, for me? Will you just please eat some breakfast?"

I groaned. I couldn't deny him when he begged like that; I gave in every time. He could see that I had caved, so he gave me a gentle smile, pecked me on the cheek, and sauntered back to the kitchen to finish the food preparations.

"That's not fair, you know," I told him.

"What's not fair, Love?" He asked innocently. He knew exactly what.

"It's not fair that you use my weaknesses against me. You know I can't stand to see you in pain, so you use your pain to get what you want."

He chuckled a little. "Sorry, Love. It's the only way I can win an argument. You always have the upper hand."

"Edward Cullen!" I exclaimed. "I, in no way, have the upper hand. Between you dazzling me, outsmarting me, and downright cheating to get what you want, I have lost practically every argument we've ever had."

He chuckled, but otherwise said nothing.

A few minutes later, he placed a plate of steamy food in front of me. I all but cringed away from the smell.

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I promise I'll be good from now on." He apologized, a playful smile dancing at the edge of his lips.

"You better." I teased.

I took a deep breath and put a pile of scrambled eggs in my mouth, trying to chew without my tongue touching the food. It tasted disgusting, but what else was new?

"Does it taste alright?" Edward asked, a concerned crease pressing into his forehead. Damn, he must have noticed my disgusted expression.

"It's delicious," I lied, "just like always." He bought my lie. His face relaxed.

Like I said before, I have become the world's greatest liar. I could even fool Edward Cullen. I was pretty proud of myself.

After eating a few more bites of his breakfast, I started feeling nauseous. I really hated eating so much. I got up, cleared the table, and started the dishwasher. Edward helped.

"Hey, Edward?" I asked.

"Yes, Love?"

"I left my red shirt at your house, and I really wanted to wear it today. Do you think you could go get it for me?"

"I have an idea, why don't I call Alice and have her bring it over. Then she can hang out with us for awhile." He replied.

"No. No, I don't want to inconvenience her. Besides, I kind of wanted it to be just the two of us today." I sounded a little frantic. I hoped he didn't notice.

"Of course, Love. I'll go get it. I'll be right back." He responded. He kissed me quickly and disappeared.

I never thought in a million years that I would want Edward to leave, but that's exactly what I needed right now. Just for a minute.

I ran up the stairs to the bathroom and closed the door behind me. I knew this was risky, and I tried to avoid risks at all costs. I had to be smart about this stuff. I had to do it when I knew he couldn't find out about it— usually when he was hunting. But I really needed this. I felt sick, I could feel the food just sitting in my stomach. Disgusting. I put my finger down my throat and threw up. I did it again and again. Even after there was nothing left in my stomach.

I flushed the toilet. Twice. And threw some bleach in it for good measure. I wasn't sure if he'd still be able to smell the vomit.

I made my way downstairs and started cleaning up the house. It wasn't long before Edward flew in the door.

"Bella, I couldn't find the shirt. I couldn't smell it anywhere. Are you sure you left it at my house?"

"Huh. Did you check your room? Thats where I thought I left it. Maybe I left it somewhere else?" I lied. I didn't even own a red shirt.

"Bella, you know you can tell me to leave if you don't want me around. You won't hurt my feelings."

Uh-oh. He was suspicious. I had to put him at ease.

I laughed as if I found his statement funny. "Edward, you're absurd. I wasn't trying to kick you out, I just needed my shirt."

"Is everything alright, Bella? You've been acting strange lately. You seem kind of. . .I dont know. . . secretive lately. You know you can tell me anything, right?"

I was close to cracking. I almost broke down then and there and told him the awful truth. For a second I had the whole conversation planned in my head. No, Edward, everything's not alright. I can't stop myself from doing terrible things. I can't eat, I have terrible nightmares, I cut my wrists. Help me.

"Everything's fine, Edward," I promised, although I couldn't look him in the eye as I said it.

He sighed. He didn't believe me, but didn't press me to tell the truth. "Let's go to our meadow," he announced. That sounded good to me.