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Episode Three
The Teleportation Secret
Updated 11/21/2014
-=o=-
Penny turned into the parking lot of 2311 North Los Robles and found an open spot close to the door for a change. She pulled in, turned off her engine, then rolled her head, trying to work out the stiffness in her neck from the day's activities. One of her last sales follow-ups for the week had been at Dr. Lorvis's office, and though the man was no longer infatuated with her, he still kept asking her questions about Amy's dating availability. At least she would be able to relax and unwind this weekend, she thought as she gathered up her purse and the attaché case of her pharmaceutical supplies and literature.
Sighing wearily, she exited her vehicle, staring at the walk that led around the corner to the front door of the apartment building. That, and a four-flight walk up was all that separated her from her home. Four long flights of stairs. Penny looked around, seeing no one nearby. This was as good an opportunity as any to practice one of her new skills. She snapped her fingers and disappeared.
A moment later she was in her apartment. It worked! Ever since Endora had shown her how to teleport, she had been working on the ability on her own. Up until now she'd been practicing small trips inside her apartment: kitchen to bedroom, bedroom to bathroom, building up her skill. Last night she had popped all the way from the laundry room back to her apartment. And now she had done it from the parking lot!
She sighed again, this time happy to be home, and dropped her purse and jacket on the sofa. It was after five, so Leonard and Sheldon should be home, too, she thought, going to her front door and opening it. She started through the door, only to halt suddenly as she realized Leonard was standing just outside.
"Whoops!" she said, narrowly avoiding colliding as Leonard started, staring at her in surprise; he then stuck his phone, on which he'd been texting, back in his pocket.
"Sorry!" he said, smiling awkwardly at her. "I was just texting you to find out where you were. I guess you didn't hear me knocking just now?" he asked.
"Come in," Penny said, avoiding the question for the moment. As Leonard entered the apartment she kissed him. "How was your week?" she asked.
"Busy," he said. "You remember I mentioned the detection of primordial gravity waves a few months ago?" Penny nodded, hoping Leonard wasn't going to ask how much she remembered, because she had no idea what he was talking about.
"Well, I learned earlier this week we got a grant to study them in more detail," Leonard went on. "I'm supposed to write up a grant proposal to study them."
"Well, that's great!" Penny smiled, giving him a hug. "Now we have something to celebrate in Vegas this weekend."
"Yeah," Leonard said, not looking her in the eye. "Well, here's the thing…"
"What thing?" Penny said, her mood immediately turning sour.
"I have to hand in my proposal Monday morning," Leonard said. "So that means I have to finish it this weekend. So that means I'm not going to be able to go to Vegas with you and everybody. But that doesn't mean you can't go!" he added, as her expression fell. "I know you didn't have much chance to have fun when you, Amy and Bernadette went there a month ago." Penny had gone along, too, but she had to curtail her fun there to study for her field ride at her new job the following Monday.
"Leonard!" Penny huffed. "Can't you get that done tonight?"
"I tried," Leonard said. "I really tried, but—" he glanced toward the door. "Sheldon has been trying to help me write the proposal, because he wants to use my data in his dark matter research.
"So, needless to say, I didn't get much done this week," he concluded. "I'm hoping with him in Vegas I can get it finished by Sunday night and hand it in to the Grant Committee Monday morning. That's why you ought to go, too," he added. "It's going to be pretty boring around here with me up to my eyebrows in work."
"I doubt if I'll have any more fun with Raj and Emily along this time," Penny complained. "That woman just doesn't like me."
"Well, to be honest, she has a good reason," Leonard said. Penny stared balefully at him. "Okay, it's not a good good reason," Leonard amended. "But if she thinks you slept with Raj—"
"But I didn't!" Penny exploded. "We got drunk and fooled around a bit, but nothing happened!" She took a deep breath. "At least, not for me. Raj said he had a beautiful experience. I think he even kept the condom."
"Ewww," Leonard made a face. "That's gross."
"Tell me about it," Penny grumbled. "Anyway, if you're not going, I'm not going, either. We can go there another time." Leonard nodded, smiled. "And get any ideas about visiting a wedding chapel out of your head right now," Penny added.
Leonard laughed, at the same time mentally crossing off some plans he'd been working on. "Since we aren't going to Vegas tomorrow," he asked. "Would you like to do something tonight, before I get started on my grant writing?"
"Hmm," Penny looked thoughtful. "Well, earlier this week a doctor told me about this nice little Italian place in North Hollywood on Magnolia Boulevard that he likes to go to. I was thinking about going there."
"That sounds nice," Leonard said. "Umm, you mean with me, don't you?"
"Of course I mean with you!" Penny said, laughing. "Leonard, stop worrying, I'm being careful when I'm with doctors now. I make sure not to flirt too much with them."
"Okay, good," Leonard breathed a sigh of relief. Then— "Uh, how much is too much…?"
"Will you stop it?" Penny said, secretly pleased Leonard was a bit jealous.
"All right," Leonard said. "So," he pondered, drawing a map in his head. "North Hollywood on a Friday night. It'll take us at least a half-hour to get there."
Penny put an innocent look on her face. "Maybe not."
"Really? Why-why not?" Leonard studied her a moment. "Do you have some hocus-pocus in mind?"
Penny smiled, nodding. "You saw how Maurice and Endora can appear and disappear? It's called teleporting in the Book of Magic, but witches and warlocks commonly refer to it as popping in or popping out."
"You mean you can disappear from one location and reappear somewhere else, like in Harry Potter?" Leonard asked.
"Yes," Penny said. "But for the last time, it's not like Harry Potter," she reminded him. In Harry Potter traveling magically was called Apparating, and it was a very unpleasant experience. "If I had to go through that I'd rather walk. I just think of where I want to be and poof, a moment later I'm there. Do you remember how Maurice took us to the Grand Canyon the day we met him? One moment we were here, the next we were there. It's just like that."
"Well, I'm game," Leonard said. "If-if you're sure you can handle the both of us."
"Pretty sure," Penny said confidently. "Mostly," she added, hopefully.
"Okay," Leonard said. "Sure you don't want me to drive? It's-it's no trouble, really," he assured her, looking a little nervous.
"Leonard, I can do it," Penny said in a firm voice. "It took me almost a month to figure out, but I've been practicing for several days now and I've got the hang of it."
"Okay," Leonard agreed. "So there's, there's no chance of Splinching, is there?"
"No," Penny said, her patience beginning to fray. "Listen, if we go now we can probably beat the Friday night rush."
"Okay," Leonard agreed. "Let me go change real quick." He started for the door.
"No time, she said, gesturing at him. Leonard's jeans, T-shirt, windbreaker and sneakers transformed into a sport suit, white shirt and black leather shoes.
Leonard looked down at himself. "Nice!" he said. "I should have you dress me more often!"
"Believe me, I've wanted to," she said, grabbing her purse off the sofa and taking his arm. "Are you ready?"
Leonard took a deep breath. "Ready," he said.
"Here we go," Penny said. She raised her hand and snapped her fingers. They vanished.
Three knocks sounded on the door. "Leonard and Penny?" a familiar voice said. This was repeated three times. There was no response from inside apartment 4B.
"Huh." Outside the apartment, Sheldon was staring at the door. "Where could they have run off to so quickly?" He wondered aloud, to himself. "We've only been home for 15 minutes, and it's too early to eat yet. Hmm. I wonder…"
Sheldon went back into his apartment and returned a moment later with Penny's apartment key. He let himself into her apartment. Of course they would have left a note for him if they had gone somewhere. But after several minutes of searching, including the contents of Leonard's old attaché case, which still had his combination code of 314, he had come up empty-handed.
"I can't understand it," Sheldon muttered, looking around the apartment for any places he might've missed. "Where could they have gone? And why did they hide that note so well? You'd think they didn't want me along. Oh, well…" Sheldon left the apartment, locking the door behind him and resigning himself to a call to the pizza parlor, planning on reviving Vintage Video Game night. His old PS2 needed dusting off, and so did his copy of Grand Theft Auto III.
-=o=-
The restaurant on Magnolia Boulevard was Antonio's Bella Vista Café, with a quiet, unassuming exterior. Penny and Leonard appeared across the street in a parking lot half-filled with cars. Leonard looked around, then pointed to a sign over the building that said "Antonio's Bella Vista."
As they crossed the street Leonard noticed the building next to the restaurant was a casting agency, and that Penny was staring at it, too. "Kind of a coincidence," he said, looking where she was looking.
"Yeah," she said in a wistful tone, and nothing else.
Inside the restaurant a young woman greeted them and took them to a table. "Here you are," she said, showing them to a small booth along a windowless wall. She set two glasses of water in front of them. "Enjoy your meal." She placed menus in front of them and hurried away as more people were starting to come in.
"Looks like we got here just in time," Penny said with a smug smile.
Leonard looked around the dining room. He and Penny were currently the only people seated. "We sure did," he agreed, trying not to sound sarcastic. "Look," he went on, after a few moments of silence, "I really am sorry we can't go to Vegas this weekend—"
"Don't worry about it," Penny waved dismissively. "I understand. I had to blow off my weekend in Vegas studying work stuff, too."
"I know, but that was a last-minute thing," Leonard said. "I've been trying to get my grant written all this week. It just didn't work out."
"I know," Penny nodded wisely. "But you know what they say—the best-laid plans of mice and men, oft get blown away by Sheldon."
Leonard smiled broadly. "They say that, do they?"
"So I hear," Penny said. She picked up her glass of water. "But enough about Sheldon. We're here to enjoy our evening together, so let's enjoy."
"Let's," Leonard agreed, picking up his water glass and clinking it against Penny's.
-=o=-
At that same moment three women were settling into their seats at a table in a Pasadena drinking establishment.
"Thank you for meeting us here," Amy said as Emily set her purse down next to her chair. "Bernadette and I thought we should have a talk about—things—before we all went on this Vegas trip."
"Thank you for inviting me," Emily said, smiling shyly. "I want this weekend to go smoothly for Raj and me as well, too."
"We do, too," Bernadette added. "That's why we thought we should talk to you about Penny."
Emily looked a little taken aback. "Oh," she said; her tone made it obvious that subject wasn't something she'd expected or wanted to talk about. "Has she said something to you about me?"
"No, nothing like that," Bernadette said quickly. "It's just that we know the two of you don't get along."
"Don't get along at all," Amy added, staring off into space, almost like she was speaking to herself.
"Right," Bernadette said, hoping Amy would stop speaking. "We just wanted to point out that the thing between her and Raj is over."
"So over," Amy muttered.
"And Penny is engaged to Leonard now," Bernadette continued. "There's really nothing to worry about between the two of them."
"Unless you dump Raj like his last girlfriend did," Amy put in. "That hit him so hard he started talking to women even without being plastered! Imagine that!" she snorted, laughing. "I still want to dissect his brain," she added, talking to herself again.
Both Emily and Bernadette were giving Amy odd looks. Emily turned back to Bernadette. "Look, I get it," she said quietly. "Penny's been your friend a long time and I'm the new girl here. I'm not supposed to make waves."
"Oh, it's not that," Amy said. "I was the new girl before you and everyone welcomed me into the group. Well, except for Leonard, who was a bit of a stick-in-the-mud about it," she muttered.
"Oh, that's not true, is it?" Bernadette asked, a big smile plastered across her face to hide her annoyance with Amy. "Leonard's a great guy. Just ask Penny—she'll tell you."
"Well, that's kind of the problem, Bernadette," Amy said, and Bernadette recognized the signs of Amy going into "Sheldon Mode"—a state where she became condescending and arrogant about her neuro-scientific knowledge. "Penny's feelings for Leonard have blinded her to his faults, to the point where she thinks there is nothing he can do wrong. I mean, have you ever seen someone who is as blithely unaware of their significant other's faults as Penny is?"
Bernadette was silent for several seconds. "I suppose not," she finally said, biting her tongue in front of Emily on the obvious retort.
"Well, there you go," Amy shrugged. "Case closed."
Bernadette's phone beeped. She pulled it out of her purse. "Oh," she said, disappointed. "Penny just texted me," she said. "Leonard can't go to Vegas this weekend, so she's staying home, too."
"Oh no," Amy looked unhappy. "She said she was going to teach me to gamble! Now what'll I do this weekend?" She slumped, looking morose.
"Well, we are going to Vegas," Bernadette reminded her, her voice turning sarcastic. "I'm sure there are a few other things you can do while we're there, maybe even with Sheldon!"
"I don't know," Amy said, doubtfully. "Sheldon said he was planning on spending the entire weekend at the Pinball Hall of Fame."
"Well," Emily said, downing the last of her drink. "I think we're done here for now." She turned to Bernadette. "Raj and I will be at your apartment at 8 tomorrow morning. Then we'll all meet at the Mirage around noon for lunch and to check-in to our rooms."
"That's the plan," Bernadette agreed. "I guess Amy can drive if Leonard and Penny aren't going." All three of them stood. "See you tomorrow," she said to Emily, who nodded and left.
Bernadette watched her leave. "I wonder if Penny decided not to go because of her," she said, thinking out loud.
"It's probably Leonard," Amy surmised. "Ever since they got engaged the poor girl's been in his thrall. So sad," she said, picking up her purse as Bernadette dropped some bills on the table for their drinks, and they left, too.
-=o=-
"I don't think I can go," Sheldon Cooper said, suitcase in hand, beige and tan jacket on his thin frame, standing in the living room of apartment 4A at 2311 N. Los Robles. "In fact," he added, setting down the suitcase. "I know I can't."
"Sheldon!" Leonard, sitting at his desk, spun in his chair to face his roommate. "It's okay. I don't need your help to write up my proposal."
"You may not think you do, Leonard," Sheldon retorted knowingly. "But you do."
"Sheldon—" Amy began.
"Now, Amy," Sheldon cut her off. "I know you had your heart set on going to Vegas, with its shady gambling dives, its gaudily-painted women, and its alcoholism-inducing free liquor, and I don't want to stand in the way of you debauching yourself, but the only thing I'm addicted to is knowledge, and lord knows Leonard needs as much help as he can get in his feeble attempts to acquire the grant money he needs to get me the knowledge I require for my dark matter research."
"Yeah, Amy," Leonard said, his tone laced with sarcasm that she would get but Sheldon would think was high praise. "Don't be hatin' on Sheldon's dark matter knowledge."
"Fine," Amy said, seeming to acquiesce. "Sheldon, I didn't want to mention this, but I have here in my purse two tickets to the Southern Nevada Railway, which I purchased online last night."
Sheldon looked at her, surprised. "A train ride? In Las Vegas?"
"Yes," Amy nodded. "And if you enjoy the ride on Saturday, we can see about going again on Sunday so you can be 'Engineer for an Hour.'"
"Oh!" Sheldon gasped. He looked at Leonard. "You're on your own, kid." He suddenly ran back into his room, returning a moment later with his engineer's cap. "Let's go!" he said, walking out of the apartment and down the stairs.
"Sorry you can't come," Amy said to Leonard.
"I am, too," Leonard said. "I was hoping to spending some time with Penny, take in a few of the shows. But it'll be okay, we'll go some other weekend."
"Good luck with your grant proposal," Amy said, then walked to the door. "Tell Penny goodbye for me," she said. "In fact, I wonder where she's at now. I thought she would be here to see us off."
"Well, I think last night she said she was going to stay up late studying," Leonard said. "She's probably sleeping in right now."
"Of course," Amy said. "Well, goodbye."
"Bye, Amy," Leonard said, turning back to his computer.
Amy closed the door to apartment 4A behind her. Instead of going down the stairs, however, she walked across the hall to 4B and knocked on the door.
Nearly a half-minute later the door opened, revealing a Penny in a T-shirt and shorts, her hair tied up and rubbing sleep from her eyes. "Amy?" she said blearily. "What's up?"
"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Amy said, her tone almost pleading. "I really was looking forward to learning how to gamble after I put Sheldon to bed."
"Sorry," Penny said, stifling a huge yawn. "I was too, but it just won't be the same without Leonard there."
"That just makes it all the easier," Amy argued. "We won't have to ditch him so we can hit the gaming tables."
"Sorry, Amy," Penny apologized. "The truth is, I'd probably come with you if Emily wasn't along as well. I'm going to go back to sleep," she said, and closed the door.
"I knew it," Amy muttered. "It's that skank's fault!" She turned and walked to the stairs. "I wonder if Bernadette brought along anything that could induce a case of the flu…"
-=o=-
By Saturday evening Leonard's grant was about two-thirds completed and Leonard was dozing in front of his computer, exhausted from working nearly non-stop for the past 12 hours. Penny had come over and made him a sandwich in the afternoon, insisting he eat something, but Leonard had remained at his computer while he ate, still working on the parameters of the tests he would design for primordial gravity wave data collection. His breathing was slow and regular as he slumped over his keyboard.
Penny, dressed in a colorful T-shirt and pants, opened the apartment door slowly. Seeing Leonard, she smiled ruefully, both proud and concerned about his dedication to getting his job done, then slipped inside and quietly shut the door. The poor sweetie probably hadn't eaten anything since the sandwich she'd made him six hours ago.
She'd come over empty-handed, but that wouldn't stop her from whipping up something for Leonard. She held out her hand, her fingers half-closed as if she were holding a cup, and a mug of hot soup appeared. "Leonard," she said softly, approaching him. "Wake up. Here's something for you to eat."
Leonard sat up. "Huh? What?" he muttered, rubbing his face tiredly.
"Here's some soup," Penny said, handing him the mug.
"Oh, thank you, sweetheart," Leonard said, sipping from the mug. He smiled up at her. "This is pretty good," he said. "What is it?"
"It's chicken tortilla soup," she said. "I thought you'd like it better than chicken noodle. You're only supposed to have that when you're sick," she added, half-joking. As Leonard sipped at the mug she asked, "So how's the grant writing going?"
"Pretty good," Leonard said, rubbing his face tiredly. "I'm almost done."
"Really?" Penny was happy to hear that. "How much longer?"
"Only about seven or eight more hours," Leonard said.
"Leonard, more eight hours of work is not 'almost done.'"
"I thought I could get it done tonight," Leonard said hopefully. "Then you and I could meet everyone in Vegas tomorrow."
"It's 8 o'clock," Penny told him. "Unless you're going to work all night you won't get done until four or five in the morning. And then you're going to need to rest so you can go to work on Monday. Leonard, I don't think we're going to Vegas this weekend."
"I can do it," Leonard insisted. "I can probably wrap this up by midnight, sleep to seven or eight a.m., then we can do that 'popping out' thing you do to Vegas. You'll see," he said, setting the cup on the table, then leaning forward as he fell asleep again.
"Oh, sweetie," Penny murmured, feeling sorry that Leonard was so exhausted he was falling asleep sitting at his computer. "You really need some rest." She gestured toward him and both she and Leonard disappeared.
They appeared in his bedroom; Leonard on his bed and Penny standing next to him. She gestured again and his clothes changed to his favorite pair of pajamas. She made a sweeping motion and the cover and bedsheets slid down the bed beneath him; then, with another motion they covered him. With a final gesture his glasses rose from his face and landed on the night table next to him. "Sleep tight," she said, kissing him on the forehead.
"Thank you, Mother," Leonard murmured in his sleep.
Penny rolled her eyes and popped back to her apartment. She sat down and picked up the Book of Magic to read, but she'd been studying it all week and she wanted something else to do. She'd been practicing moving and guiding objects with her magic, and had gotten so she could make a pair of dice do whatever she wanted—she could roll any number, any combination she wanted. Idly, she picked up the pair of dice she'd been using from the coffee table, shook them in her hand, and rolled them across the table. They stopped at the very edge showing a one and a six—a natural seven. Too bad it would be wrong for her to use her power in Vegas, she thought.
She picked up the mail she'd pulled from her mailbox this morning. She'd barely glanced at it before but one of the pieces caught her attention. It was from one of her credit card companies and there was a broad red line across the front—a sure sign of a late notice. She sighed, opening the envelope and gaped at the amount due. It was well into five figures. It was going to be a long time, even on her new salary, before she could pay off this debt. She and Leonard would probably be long married before that happened, and she didn't want to burden him with problems she'd created for herself. She glanced back at the dice.
The Book of Magic had warned her that there could be consequences to using magic in the mortal world. She couldn't just cancel her credit card debt—someone at the credit card companies would notice, and there'd be inquiries for her to deal with. She might even get someone fired if they couldn't explain how Penny's credit card debt had vanished into thin air.
On the other hand, people having wins at a Vegas casino probably happened all the time. You always heard about someone striking it rich on one of the slot machines or something like that. Who would notice, really, if she won, say, 10,000 dollars over the course of an evening? Or even $20,000? Or $40,000?
No, she shouldn't be greedy, Penny decided. Ten thousand dollars in one night was plenty. She stood, spreading her arms slightly, and her clothes were instantly replaced with a dark red cocktail dress with a plunging neckline. Her feet now wore a pair of black pumps, increasing her height about three inches. A small black and silver Milly clutch she had seen in a Nordstrom's catalog completed her ensemble.
She opened the clutch and looked inside. The only thing she needed now was money. Making money out of nothing was probably not a good idea—you never knew when two bills with the same serial numbers might end up in the same hands. Both bills would be indistinguishable from real money (they both would be real money), but different bills were not supposed to have the same serial numbers. Well, there was an easy answer. She snapped her fingers.
Leonard's wallet appeared in her hand. She opened it, finding two twenties and a ten inside, along with an ATM slip. Leonard had visited the bank recently. Well, she would return this money to him, with interest, when she returned from Vegas. She dropped the bills in her clutch, put Leonard's wallet on her coffee table, took a deep breath to mentally prepare herself to pop out, and vanished.
-=o=-
"I've never been so insulted in my life!" Sheldon declared as he, Amy, Howard, Bernadette, Raj and Emily left the elevator on the ground floor of the Mirage Hotel in Las Vegas. "How can they ban me from the Southern Nevada Railway for life?"
"In fairness, Sheldon," Amy replied pragmatically. "You did try to tell the engineer how to drive the train."
"Because he was doing it wrong," Sheldon insisted. "The correct signal when approaching a crossing is two long, one short, then another long. The engineer did one long, one short, then a long and a short one again! That's an entirely different signal!"
At the back of the group, Emily whispered to Raj. "Is he always like this?"
"It could be worse," Raj shrugged. "I'm surprised the hotel hasn't kicked us out yet."
"Give him time," Howard muttered. "We haven't had dinner yet."
"Speaking of dinner," Bernadette said. "Where should we eat?"
Sheldon looked around. "As Saturday is usually my laundry night, I usually have another bowl of cereal, usually from the high-fiber side of the cereal row. Which of the restaurants here serve high-fiber cereal?"
"Sheldon, come on," Howard said. "They have everything here from steaks to Starbucks, from burgers to frozen yogurt. You can have whatever you want."
"I want Raisin Bran," Sheldon said, stubbornly. Howard sighed, frustrated.
"I'll thank you to keep your mind on your own colon, my good man," Sheldon snapped, then turned and walked into the nearest restaurant to inquire about cereal availability.
"Yep, we're getting kicked out of the hotel," Howard said. The rest of the group followed Sheldon into the restaurant.
-=o=-
One of the things Endora had told Penny about teleporting—or "popping" as it was commonly called—was when you arrived in places where mortals were usually found it was best to arrive invisible and intangible, then materialize once you'd gotten your bearings.
So when Penny arrived in the atrium of the casino where she, Bernadette and Amy had recently tried to have a fun weekend, she was unnoticed by anyone there. Which was fortunate for her, as she staggered on her heels and nearly fell. Traveling that far in a single pop had left her weakened and dizzy. Whoa, she thought, moving toward a nearby empty chair and dropping into it. That was a lot harder than I expected. No one was looking her way so she materialized, then conjured up a glass of water to drink to steady herself.
She sat there for almost a minute before she stood and looked around for the gaming table rooms. The casino area was nearby so she took another deep breath, made sure her hair was in place, then walked through the slots and other gaming areas to the high limit lounge.
Penny stood at the entrance for several seconds, deciding what she'd like to try first. She wanted to play craps, the game she'd planned to show to Amy, but wasn't sure how long it would take her to win $10,000—craps betting other than hitting your point number mystified Penny, but as long as you didn't bet all your money on one roll it was a good game to teach to others.
"Excuse me."
Penny turned, looking at the gentleman who had appeared at her elbow with surprise. He was tall and handsome, impeccably dressed in a nicely tailored suit and holding a highball glass. "Are you waiting for someone?" the man asked her.
"No," she said, smiling automatically as years of experience had taught her to do. "Just deciding which game I'd like to play tonight."
"I would be pleased if you would join me at the roulette table," the man said, gesturing toward a nearby table. "When I saw you I had a sudden intuition that you would be lucky for me tonight."
Years of experience had also taught Penny to recognize a come-on line when she heard one. Not that it mattered much—she had no intention of doing anything except winning a lot of money for an hour or two, then heading back to Pasadena. "Aren't you sweet?" she said, deciding then and there that roulette would be her game tonight. "Yes, I will join you at the roulette table."
"Excellent," the man said. "Would you care for something to drink?" he asked, at the same time raising his hand for a server. One appeared almost immediately. He looked inquiringly at Penny.
"Oh, just—" Penny thought quickly. "A glass of champagne, please." It was one of the most expensive drinks you could order. She watched to gauge the man's reaction. He didn't bat an eye as he nodded to the waitress, who immediately headed toward the bar as the man offered his arm to escort her. She placed her hand in the crook of his arm and they walked over to the table. The wheel was European style, with a single zero; Penny had been told that the odds were slightly better on this type of table than on an American style wheel, which had both zero and double-zero slots on the wheel.
Penny's escort took out his wallet and extracted five one-hundred dollar bills, topping them on the table in front of the attendant, who took them and passed the man five stacks of white chips. He turned to her and Penny automatically smiled, not sure what she should do next. "How many chips would you like?" her escort prompted.
"Oh, right, duh!" Penny laughed, then took the $50 from her purse and put it on the table. The dealer stared at it a moment, waiting for her to put out more, then shrugged and moved a small stack of green chips in front of her. "Oh," Penny said. "Can I have the light blue ones?" she asked. The dealer nodded and took back the green chips, replacing them with light blue ones. At the same time her glass of champagne arrived; Penny sipped delicately; the champagne had a dry, pleasant taste. She could get used to this.
Her blue chips were now in front of her. All two of them. "I didn't get many chips, did I?" she said to her escort.
"They are worth $25 apiece," the man told her, smiling. "Don't worry," he added, lowering his voice. "If you lose your chips I will front you some."
"Gosh, thanks," Penny said, keeping the sarcasm out of her voice. Obviously the guy was looking to take advantage of her by getting her drunk and into his debt.
"Place your bets," the dealer said.
Penny picked up her two chips. "I think I'll put one here," she said, placing one chip on the 3 square. "And one here," she added, putting the other chip on the 31 square.
"Wait, wait," the man said.
"What?" Penny looked at him, puzzled. She'd intended to make the ball land on the 31, which would win 35 more blue chips for her. "What's wrong?"
"That's not how to bet on roulette," the man said. "You should start safe and bet on the outside."
"On the outside?" Penny repeated. "What's that mean?"
"It means these spots here," the man said, indicating the row of bets on the table nearest them. There were squares marked "ODD," "EVEN," "RED," "BLACK," "1-18" and "19-36." Above these squares were three rectangles with "1ST 12," "2ND 12," and "3RD 12" in them. "This first row pays even odds," he said, "and these pay 2 to 1," indicating the second row. "These are the inside bets," the man continued, pointing to the individual numbers. "You should play the game a little before you start putting bets here."
"Oh, I see," Penny said, hiding her irritation. I'll show him how to play this game! she thought to herself. "Okay, I'll just put my chips here," she said, putting them both in the square marked BLACK.
"Good," the man nodded. "I will place two chips on the red square," he said. "We will see which one of us is correct." He looked at the dealer, who spun the wheel and set the ball to rolling around the edge.
As the ball began circling the wheel Penny made a subtle gesture toward it, casting her spell. The ball would now land in the exact slot she wanted.
"No more bets," the dealer said as the ball bounced around the spinning wheel. Penny and her escort watched as the ball finally settled into the slot for 31, a black number.
"Thirty-one, the winner," the dealer said, setting a marker on the number, pushing two more blue chips to Penny and collecting the gentleman's white chips from the table.
"Very good!" her escort complimented Penny, his face wearing a smile that did not reach his eyes.
"Thanks," Penny said, not paying attention to the predatory look he was giving her. She had just doubled her chips, which meant she now had a hundred bucks. That was still a long way from 10,000 dollars, but if she kept doubling her money each bet it would take only… well, it wouldn't be long until she was there, she decided.
-=o=-
Amy and Sheldon walked briskly out of the restaurant, both looking harried. "Sheldon," Amy said, as they came to a halt in the casino area. "They told you, oatmeal is not a valid side dish for steak and lobster."
"Well, it should be," Sheldon grumbled. "It would make a perfect fiber complement to the steak's protein and the omega-3 content of the lobster."
"Be that as it may," Amy continued. "It was very rude of you to suggest they needed to redo their menu right then and there for you."
Sheldon stared at her. "Interesting," he said. "Do you consider it rude when I make suggestions about the meals you prepare for us when we have date-night at your apartment?"
"That's different," Amy said. She paused a moment, trying to decide exactly how it was different. "There are only so many ways to prepare strawberry Quik," she finally said. "And I know exactly how you like your spaghetti and hot dogs."
"True, you do," Sheldon conceded. He sighed with resignation at the situation. "Well, I suppose there's nothing to do but have a slice of pizza at the Pizza Kitchen on the other side of the casino," he said, starting to walk that way.
"Hold on a second," Amy said, stopping him. "Look over there." She pointed toward the high stakes section of the casino, where a statuesque blonde in black was standing at one of the roulette tables, next to a tall, dark-haired man. "Does that look like Penny to you, Sheldon?"
"Nonsense," Sheldon said peremptorily. "Penny didn't come with us. Why would she be here when she could be happily at home instead of having to deal with snotty waiters who refuse to make what you order?"
"But that looks a lot like Penny," Amy insisted, wondering who the man next to her could be. He was too tall to be Leonard. And too handsome, see could see as the man turned to look at the blonde next to him. She glanced at him, and Amy was convinced. "That's her, Sheldon," she said. "I'd not that perfectly-shaped nose anywhere. Penny!" she called out, waving her hand in the air. "Over here!"
At the roulette table, Penny heard her name called and turned toward the sound. She saw Amy waving at her. "Oh, crap," she breathed. "I forgot! This is the hotel they were going to!"
"What is it?" her escort asked, looking where she was looking. Things were not turning out like he'd planned. Instead of losing her money right away, the blonde he'd picked up had been winning on every spin of the wheel. She had something like $6400 in chips now. "Is that someone you know?" he asked.
"Maybe," she said, thinking quickly. She needed a diversion. Amy and Sheldon were coming her way. She grabbed Tall, Dark and Creepy. "How about a quick kiss, for luck?" she said, turning him so his body was between her and Amy, and pressing her lips against his mouth. The man reacted, surprised but eager, and kissed back, trying to push his tongue between her lips. Pig, she thought, and dematerialized, leaving the man holding thin air. He looked around, confused, as Amy and Sheldon came up to him.
"Was there a young blonde woman here just a moment ago?" Amy asked him.
"Yes," the man said, still looking around. At the same time, unnoticed by everyone except the dealer, the blue chips on the table slid across the table to a spot near the dealer's elbow. He watched, fascinated, as they stopped next to him.
"Can you cash me out?" The dealer jerked as he realized the blonde was now crouched down behind the table next to him. "And snap it up," she added. "I'm in a hurry." Nodding, the dealer began converting the roulette chips to casino chips.
"Well, where did she go?" Amy was asking the man she'd seen with Penny. "She was just here."
"I thought—" the man looked around again. He'd been holding her, and suddenly she wasn't there! "I don't—"
"Amy, come on," Sheldon said, disparagingly. "It's obvious too much alcohol has addled his wits."
"No!" the man said. "She was here … somewhere…"
"Can't I get cash?" Penny whispered, still hiding behind the table.
"Sorry," the dealer said, also in a whisper, though he didn't understand why. "You have to cash out your chips at the cashier's cage."
"Fine," Penny muttered. She reached over the edge of the table and grabbed her chips.
Amy caught the motion and saw the arm withdraw back over the edge of the table. "Penny!" she said. "It's Amy! Come out from behind—" She went around behind the table but there was nobody there but the dealer, who looked at her and shrugged.
Penny, who'd dematerialized as soon as she was out of sight, was walking invisibly across the casino to the cashier's window. She walked up to a window, materialized and dropped the chips in front of her. "Cashing out, please," she said in a hurried tone.
The girl behind the window evidently didn't share Penny's idea of haste. She scooped up the chips, stacking them slowly and carefully, then began counting them. "Hurry, please," Penny said, glancing behind her toward the high stakes area, where she could see Amy and Sheldon turn and start walking her way. She turned back, hunched her shoulders to hide her blonde hair as much as possible, and hoped the girl would hurry the hell up.
"I.D. please," the girl said in a bored tone.
"Oh my God, why?" Penny huffed. "It's only a few chips!"
"It's 6400 dollars," the girl said. "We have to report it."
"Fine," Penny snapped. "Here." She pulled her driver's license out of her purse and slapped it on the window counter. The girl took it with a look of what's-her-problem at Penny and stuck it in a scanner.
Across the casino, Amy and Sheldon were walking out of the high stakes area. "I could have sworn I saw her," Amy was saying, mostly to herself. Sheldon was looking carefully at her.
"I think a slice of pepperoni and beef would be nice, don't you?" he asked.
"What?" Amy said, distracted by the non sequitur.
"Pizza," Sheldon clarified. He snapped his fingers to bring Amy out of her apparent trance. "Come on, Amy, your mind is a million miles away from the problem at hand."
"Sheldon, I'm sure I saw Penny," Amy insisted. "I'm sure of it…" she repeated, looking away. "There she is!" she suddenly exclaimed, pointing toward the cashier's window where a short-haired blonde woman in a black dress stood, her back to them. "Come on!"
"Oh, what fresh H-E-double toothpicks is this now?" Sheldon muttered as Amy grabbed his hand and dragged him after her.
At the window, the cashier handed Penny her I.D., 64 100-dollar bills, and a receipt identifying the money as gambling winners. "There you are, ma'am," cashier said. "Have a pleasant day."
"Thanks," Penny said, preparing to dematerialize. Just as she'd stuffed her license and the money in her purse, a hand fell on her shoulder.
"Penny, is that you?" Amy's voice said, in a quivering tone.
Crap crap crap! She couldn't be caught here! But what could she do? What kind of spell could she cast to get herself out of this? If she dematerialized now she might take Amy with her, and how would she explain that?
There was one thing she might do—Penny hoped she wouldn't screw up the spell. One of the spells in the Book of Magic was a Switching Spell—she could switch places with another person and herself. Penny immediately snapped her fingers, concentrating on the spell, and switched places with the creep who'd been trying to get her drunk and broke.
"Turn around," Amy demanded, pulling on the person's shoulder, and found herself face-to-face with the man they'd left back at the roulette table. "You?" she exclaimed. "What happened to the blonde?"
"How-how did I get here?" the man muttered. "I was over—" he looked around, realizing he was on the other side of the casino now.
Back at the casino table, the dealer looked up from the table, expecting to see the man who'd been trying to scam the hot blonde who'd won over $6000 in just a few minutes. "No more bets—" he trailed off as the hot blonde was standing there again, and no sign of the guy.
"Hi again," she said, smiling uncomfortably. "Just making sure I had my purse," she explained.
"It's in your hand," the dealer said, pointing to it.
"Oh, right," Penny held it up as if she'd just remembered. "Thanks! Bye." She turned and walked off briskly, seeming to literally vanish and she walked into the crowds of people in the casino.
The dealer shook his head, then pulled a cell phone out of his pocket and dialed a quick number. "I need a break," he told his pit boss. "Now."
-=o=-
The trip back home to Pasadena was slower than the trip to Vegas had been. For one thing, Penny wasn't going to try to make it back in one pop. She remembered a cafe she, Amy and Bernadette had stopped in on their way back from Vegas the last time they'd gone. It was a little Mexican place on the east side of Barstow, California, about halfway between Vegas and Pasadena. She'd aimed for it, and arrived feeling a bit winded by better than trying to go the whole way.
Since she was there, and had some extra money, she decided to have dinner. She got a table and ordered a vegetarian enchilada and a margarita. Why not? She wasn't driving, so to speak.
The margarita was gone and she was into her second one when the entrée arrived. She thanked the server and was digging into the enchilada when her cell phone rang. She fished it out of her purse. "Hello?"
"Penny?" It was Amy. "Where are you?"
Penny made a face. "I'm at home," she said. "Where else would I be at this time of night?"
"You won't believe this," Amy said excitedly. "But I saw someone here in Vegas who looked just like you!"
"You did, huh?" Penny said, feigning interest. "Wow, lucky girl," she joked, knowing what Amy thought of her looks.
"It was uncanny," Amy went on. "Whoever we saw, she was with some guy in the high stakes room of the casino, playing roulette."
"You don't say," Penny murmured, taking a long drink from her margarita. "Was she winning?"
"I couldn't tell," Amy said. "Sheldon didn't believe me. He's calling Leonard now to check on you."
"Good idea," Penny said, taking a bite of the enchilada. "Except Leonard's probably asleep by—what did you say?" She spit out the enchilada as she realized what Amy had said.
"Sheldon's calling Leonard now."
"Right now?" "Penny demanded. "Tell Sheldon not to call him! Abort! Abort!"
"Sheldon!" Penny heard Amy call out. "Don't wake Leonard—oh, he already answered? He's going to check on her now?" Amy turned back to her cell. "This is amusing, you should see Leonard any second now… Penny? Penny?"
But Penny was gone from the restaurant, leaving a hundred-dollar bill for the twenty-dollar meal. She appeared, invisible, in her living room.
Leonard was standing in the open doorway, looking around. "Penny?" he called out. "Are you here? Penny?"
Penny popped into her bedroom. Thank god the door was closed! She snapped her fingers, replacing her black dress with a nightgown, slippers taking the place of her heels. She ran her hands through her hair, disheveling it, then opened the door and said sleepily. "Leonard, sweetie, is that you?"
"Hi," Leonard said, coming over to her as she stepped into the room. "I just got a weird call from Sheldon," he told her. "He said Amy thinks she saw you in Vegas, with another man. I told him that was silly." He gave her a wary look. "It is silly, isn't it?"
"Of course it's silly," she said, smoothing her hair down again.
"Good," Leonard said. He looked down. "So," he asked slowly. "What's that in your hand?"
Penny looked down as well. She was still holding the Milly clutch purse in her hands. "Oh, just a little something I saw in a Nordstrom's catalog," she said casually. "Nice, isn't it?"
"Um, yeah," Leonard agreed. "I, ah, have another question." He walked over to the coffee table, where he'd seen his wallet sitting there. He picked it up, showing it to her. "I don't remember leaving this here," he said.
"Well, of course you don't," Penny said, with a forced laugh. "If you remembered you'd still have it with you."
"That's not what I meant," Leonard said, in a no-nonsense tone. "There's something funny going on here. And when I say that, I don't mean ha-ha funny. I mean hocus-pocus funny." He stared at her, his expression telling her he would brook no cute excuses this time.
"Okay, fine," Penny said, in a resigned voice. "I was in Vegas earlier."
"What for?" Leonard asked. "You didn't have to sneak off—I didn't mind if you went."
"I know that, Leonard," she said, walking around and sitting on the sofa. He joined her, waiting to hear her explanation. "It's just—" she closed her eyes, rubbing her forehead as if it was suddenly hurting. "Emily was going, and you weren't, and I really didn't want to go if you weren't going.
"But then I realized how easy it would be to make a little money in the casino using my magic," she went on. "I didn't want to tell you how snowed under I am with credit card debt. I don't want you to be burdened by that once we're married. I thought I could get it paid off…" Penny trailed off, tears starting to form in her eyes. She hadn't meant to break down in front of Leonard, but—
"Hey, it's okay," Leonard murmured. "I already guessed about the credit cards," he said, smiling.
"How?" she asked, curious.
"Well, you did ask me about whether that was something we should talk about before we got married," he reminded her. "It wasn't that hard to figure out."
She smiled wryly. "I guess not," she agreed.
"Plus," he admitted. "I steamed open one of your statements…"
"Leonard!"
"Sorry, sorry," Leonard quickly apologized. "To be honest I needed an idea of where you were, financially."
She nodded, mollified by the apology. "Well, I'm not as bad off as I was this morning," she said excitedly. "Lookit!" she opened her purse and took out her Vegas winnings, showing it to him.
Leonard took the money, fanning it out and goggling at the hundred-dollar bills. "There must be thousands here!" he said, awed.
"Sixty-four hundred!" Penny beamed. "Well, sixty-three—I left a hundred for a meal in a restaurant in Barstow."
"A hundred dollars?" Leonard gulped. "That must've been a hell of a meal!"
"I didn't have time to wait for change," Penny said. "I was trying to get home before you found out I wasn't here."
Leonard managed a laugh. "So you finally paid for a meal," he joked. "Too bad I wasn't there to see that."
"You might find out soon than you think," Penny warned him, taking back the $6300 and waving it at him before dropping it in her purse. "Now that I've got some extra spending cash."
"I thought that was to pay off your credit card bills," he reminded her.
"Some of it," Penny muttered. "And maybe a celebratory new pair of shoes for my new job."
"You know you have to pay taxes on that money," Leonard reminded her.
"I remember," Penny said, having already been reminded of that earlier that night. "I'll just win more to pay for the extra taxes."
"Yeah," Leonard hedged. "Well, I wonder if that's a good idea."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, the casinos are going to pay attention whenever they lose large sums of money," Leonard explained. "They're going to study what happened and keep video records of people they see in situations like that."
"They've got video of me?" Penny exclaimed. "I never saw any cameras!"
"They're well-hidden," Leonard said. "Anyway, if they see the same person winning large amounts of money from them, they're going to ask you to leave whenever they see you. They probably won't let you into the hotel at all."
"Well, then I just won't be the same person all the time," Penny said stubbornly. Her hair suddenly changed from her current short cut back to shoulder length. "Easy-peasy," she said, using Leonard's term. "I can even do this." Her blonde hair became flaming red. "Sort of the Scarlett Johansson/Black Widow look."
Leonard's breath caught for a moment. "N-nice," he said, smiling nervously.
Penny grinned at him. "You like?"
"It's—" Leonard swallowed before continuing. "It's an interesting look for you," he said. Unconsciously he wriggled his hips to relieve some pressure he was feeling below the waist.
The motion didn't escape Penny's notice. "Well," she said, sidling up to him and running her hand down his side. "Maybe we can get away sometime, just the two of us, up to Vegas for a cozy weekend together, you and 'Scarlett' here."
"That—that would be very nice," Leonard said, his voice trembling. Penny kissed him on the lips, then again, and they came together for a longer, deeper kiss.
Leonard's phone rang.
He pulled it out of his pocket on the third ring. "Yeah?" he said past Penny's lips.
"Leonard?" Sheldon's voice came over the line, sounding anxious. "You never called back. Was Penny there?"
"She's here…" Leonard said.
"Are you sure?" Sheldon asked. "Amy was quite sure it was her—"
"She's here, Sheldon," Leonard said. "I'll talk to you later."
"But—" Sheldon's voice cut off in mid-protest as Leonard shut off his phone and tossed it on the sofa.
-=o=-
Sunday afternoon Leonard and Penny were in his and Sheldon's apartment watching The Avengers when the door opened and Sheldon and Amy entered. "You're back!" Penny exclaimed, smiling as they dropped Sheldon's luggage on the living room floor.
"Yes, we're back," Sheldon said in a condescending tone. "And thank you, Penny, for taking the pressure off Leonard to once again state the obvious."
"Sheldon," Amy warned. "Don't take your bad mood out on Penny and Leonard. It's not their fault you couldn't be 'Engineer for an Hour' this morning."
"You're right, Amy," Sheldon agreed. "I shouldn't blame them. I blame you."
"Me?" Amy said, surprised.
"Yes!" Sheldon continued relentlessly. "If you hadn't booked those tickets for Saturday I wouldn't have been banned that day and could have been Engineer for an Hour on Sunday!"
"Yeah, Amy," Penny said. "Don't be hatin' on engineers."
"So where are Raj and Howard?" Leonard asked.
"Howard and Bernadette took Rajesh and Emily back to their apartment, where his car was," Amy said.
"So," Penny asked casually. "Did any of them see this woman who looked like me?"
"No," Amy said, in a disappointed tone. "They were still having dinner. It was uncanny," she said to Penny. "I could have sworn it was you!"
"Well, like I said before," Penny laughed, "lucky girl!"
"That reminds me," Sheldon looked up suddenly at Leonard. "Did you finish your grant proposal, Leonard?"
"Finished it this morning," Leonard said, proudly. "I'll turn it in tomorrow morning. I think it's some of my best work."
"Yes, well…" Sheldon made a shrugging gesture. "Hope springs eternal in the human breast. Even yours, Leonard."
"Thank you, Sheldon!" Leonard said, annoyed at Sheldon's condescension.
"You're welcome, Leonard," Sheldon answered, as usual blithely unaware.
"Well, I should head for home," Amy said, standing slowly and picking up her coat and purse. "I'm beat." She looked slyly at Sheldon. "Unless, someone was willing to let me sleep here tonight…"
"You can use my bed if you want," Leonard offered. Amy, Sheldon and Penny all turned to look at him in surprise. "I meant," Leonard hastily clarified. "Amy could sleep in my bed and I could sleep at Penny's."
"Thank you, Leonard," Amy said. "I was hoping for an offer from Sheldon, however." She smiled at her boyfriend. "I believe our Relationship Agreement does allow for such sleepovers when the situation warrants it," she added.
Sheldon was still for several seconds. "Of course, Amy," he said at last. "You may sleep here tonight if you wish."
"Really?" both Penny and Leonard gasped, stunned by what Sheldon had said.
"Really?" Amy said, excitement in her voice as her loins started to quiver.
"Yes, really," Sheldon agreed. He gestured to the couch. "Knock yourself out." He then turned and walked down the hall to his bedroom.
Amy sighed. "Not exactly what I had in mind," she muttered. "But it's a start."
-=o=-