Chapter Sixteen

"ANGELA? What happened?" Mom dropped her purse and ran over to us. She looked at Johnny. "What happened?"

"It'a alright, Ms. Black. She's sad because I have to leave tomorrow."

"Oh, that's too bad. Sure you cant stay a little longer?"

Johnny shook his head sullenly. "I wish I could. I don't wanna leave Angela here by herself, I wanted to take her with me, but that's for you and her to talk about." He loosened his grip on me and held my arms. "Sweetie, talk to your mom, 'kay?"

I wiped my eyes and tried to regain my composure. "Okay, John."

He kissed me and walked upstairs, leaving mom and I alone downstairs.

"Mom..." I sniffled. Why were things like this so hard? "See, the thing is...John could only stay for a couple of days, but if I went with him, that would mean me leaving you all alone."

She listened to me.

"I don't want to do that to you, mom. I love you, and you'd be so lonely without me here. Since dad died last year, you've had a rough enough time already, and I'd just make things worse for you by leaving. You'd have nobody to talk to or eat with or anything!" The tears resumed and came rolling down my face. "I don't want to do that to you. I just don't. I love John, mom. God knows I love him to death. You know how much I love him, but I cant go with him knowing I'll be leaving you behind and all by yourself."

Mom sighed. "Alright, honey calm down. Let me ask you something."

I sniffled. "Yes, anything, mom."

"Do you want to stay here in Baltimore? Or do you want to go with John to New York?"

"I..." I looked down. "I don't know what I want. I love the both of you too much to choose."

Mom chuckled sympathetically. "Angela, listen to me. Just listen...you have always been a caring person, since you were a little girl. Always selfless, and I'm glad that you are this way. But sweetheart, you need to understand that I'm a grown woman and that I'm you mother. I can take care of myself, darling." She put her hand underneath my chin. "I'll be just fine. Yes, I know you've lived here all of your life..." She looked around at the walls of the living room. "Goodness, what memories this house brings when you really look at it. Both good and bad times we've had here." Her eyes went back to me. "You have lived here since your first day of being in this world. But you're a woman now, Angela. You're not that same little girl that used to prance around here dressing up in my clothes and watching Sesame Street. You're a woman, with experiences that you will carry for the rest of your life. And you know..." She pointed her finger in an upwards direction. "That man you have up there, he's a good man, Angela. He's good for you, and he'll take care of you. I know he will, I trust him."

"I know, mom. I know."

"He loves you, girl. I see it in his eyes. I see it. I know he'd never do you any wrong."

Laughing lightly though my tears, I said, "Well I sure hope not, or I'll have to beat the living tar out of him."

"No no, sweetie. He won't. And that's why you need to go with him. Go, honey. Go and live your life in the Big Apple. Have new experiences, a new life away from Baltimore. See what's out there in the world. John's a big ole rockstar, so I'm sure he'll take you to all kinds of places."

I sighed and bit my lip. "Are you sure about this? Mom, I-"

"Go with him, honey. I'm absolutely sure. You love him, don't you? Go with him, and have a load of fun while you're with him too. Okay?"

I smiled and took her in a strong embrace. "Oh, I love you mom. Thank you."

"I love you too. Never forget that. Here." She let go of me. "Call him downstairs."

I ran to the foot of the stairs and called Johnny. "John, come down! Hurry!" When he got closer to me, I tackled him in a huge hug too.

"What, what happened? Ah, jeez Angie, stop squeezin' me so tight."

I released him and looked at him. "Guess what? I'll be packing my bags tonight." I smiled, and he started to.

"Wait, you mean you're comin' with me? Really?"

I nodded. "Everything's fine, I'm quitting my job, I'm leaving everything behind. I want to come with you, baby."

"Wow, that's...that's great!" He looked over at my mom. "Ms. Black, you wont have to worry about anything. I'll make sure she doesn't get into any trouble."

Mom laughed. "Angela's a good girl. She'll behave herself in New York, right honey?"

Johnny and I looked at eachother and burst out laughing. We both knew that wasn't true, but we kept quiet anyways.

"John, if we're leaving in the morning, we need to pack up right now!"

"Yeah, you're right. We should get a head start."

. . .

"Okay, that's about everything." I placed my last t-shirt in my suitcase and zipped it up. "Wow, look at my room, it's so...empty." My walls were bare. Nothing. My bed was made up, and there was nothing on the floor like there usually would be. A wave of sadness and nostalgia crept over me.

"You alright, babe?" John went behind me and held my waist. "You look sad."

"Oh no, I'm happy, it's just...well look at my room! I can't believe Im actually leaving. I've...been in this room my whole life. I admit, I guess I am a little sad."

He bit his lip. "Ya sure about this? Sweetie, if you feel like you're not ready for this, I can always just-"

"No, John. I want to go with you. I've made my decision. This room...it's apart of me. It was the place I went to when I felt the world turned it's back on me. When I felt lonely. I'd spend time here to think, you know?" I sighed. "I'm going to miss it, but I think it's time I let it go. I have to move on, and be with you. I need to explore the world. I can't do that if I'm stuck in Baltimore for the rest of my life. Besides, I have to see Marky again and give him a big hug."

Johnny laughed. "You miss Mark, eh?"

"Yeah, I miss all of them. Especially Dee Dee, he was so funny." I decided not to mention Joey on purpose. The last thing I needed was another argument over him when we were supposed to be packing up to leave. "Hey, I have to ask you something."

His green eyes widened. "Hm?"

"Well, I know this sounds weird, but...I was wondering if I could hang up a few of my Ramones posters at your house?"

Johnny snickered.

"It's just, I wanted to take just a piece of my room with me." I kissed his cheek. "Please?"

He smiled and rolled his eyes. "Alright alright, whatever."

"Yay! Thanks, John."

"Not too many, though. Last thing I want is to try making love to you while seein' Mark's face." He gagged. "Oh man, I don't even wanna think about that."

I bursted into laugher. "Dude, your sense of humor has me rolling on the floor. Do you know that?"

He chuckled and said, "Yeah, I know. It gets your friends goin' too it seems."

I gasped and put my hands in my face. "Shit! I have to call Mayra and tell her I'm leaving. Oh Jesus, I'm such an idiot, why didn't I think of that before?" I ran downstairs to the phone and placed a call to Mayra's house. I told her to come to see us off, and she said she'd bring the others also.

I was going to miss that girl. She was my best friend since seventh grade. We did everything together, and now...now I was leaving her too. I knew she'd probably tell me tomorrow not to feel bad, that I should go, just like mom said to me. But I still couldn't help feeling a bit guilty. I was leaving both of them in this godforsaken town to live the life of a musician's girlfriend. I was gonna go to Japan, Italy, Australia. Everywhere! And they'd still be here. It was then that I realized that they should share that same excitement, and so I'd call and invite them to tour with us every once in a while.

After I hung up the phone with Mayra, I began to get excited. My sadness phase was gone, and all that was left was knowing what I'd be experiencing. Did I ever think that I'd be this close to the Ramones as this? Did I know this at the time of being a teenager and watching them on my television, hoping that they'd pop out of the screen and Joey would sing to me in that voice of his? No. Did I know I'd eventually end up with my idol and favorite member of the group? No, I didn't. I Couldn't have possibly known that any of this would happen. Was this even reality? I swear, I could wake up any minute from this dream...why did it feel so much like one?

"Well, New York, here I come..."