I'm so screwed.
Her hand recoils away from me.
"YOU WHAT?" she asks in shock. (Like that reference, bros?) I blush and turn the opposite direction. I DO NOT wanna talk about THAT.
"Nothing!" I snap quickly. I can hear her get off the table behind me and leave the room. My heart sinks. My antennae flop. I begin to mope. The same as I did last night. No sleep. No thoughts about anything other than her.
Why did I say that?!
I want answers. But it looks like she won't be talking to me…ever again. A tear rolls down my face. It burns slightly. Irkens aren't supposed to cry, after all. We have special glands in our eyes, which are the only water-proof thing in our bodies. The glands hold in tears, until they come out.
Which, so far, has happened to no Irken except me.
I hate myself right now. I hate myself for what I said, what I've been thinking of, and for what I've screwed up. I hate my life sometimes. I hate myself right now. I should've listened when the academy told me to ignore that!
Now, I'll probably lose the next battle with her in L.A. Maybe on my own free will.
I jump off the table and sulk. I hate…everything…
…except her.
Why do I love her?
This is more pain than last night!
Zim has done nothing to deserve this! Why does the Tak reject Zim so?! WHY?!
I sigh and wipe the tears from my face. It's not that this isn't worth crying over…
..it's just that I'm not. I walk out of the room and back upstairs, where I walk out the front door. I hate nighttime on Earth. It smells horrible, the streets are filled with humans, and that creepy madness-chihuahua is following me, isn't it?
Yup.
I turn around and see it. Humans call it cute. I call, it madness! The eyes, bulging out, the tail wagging, and what the f*** is with the stitch! HOW DID IT EVEN GET THAT?! I scream and run the other direction. I don't look behind me, but I know it's following me. I quickly cut corners and run into my house, locking the front door behind me. I slump on the ground. Another tear rolls down my cheek. I don't care if it burns or not.
"Finally! You fell for my trap, Zim!" Dib again. I get up and glare at him. His face, which was proud before, looks afraid. I don't have my usual glare. I stare at him like he's the devil challenging me. I glare at him like he's everything I hate in my life. I glare at him like I should. With hate. Tears of misery start to fall down my cheek.
"Leave now. Or I swear to Irk I'm going to follow you to Hell when you die." I say. Dib cringes and quickly runs out the door. I glare at him from outside the window. I'm keeping that promise. I will follow him to Hell. Well, maybe I won't follow him. I'll probably end up following Tak to Hell.
Something in my mind tells me she doesn't deserve Hell. I sit on the couch and turn on the T.V. Gir sits next to me.
"Whatcha doin'?" he asks. I sigh and point to the screen. "Yay, T.V!" he shouts. I smirk slightly. He amuses me from time to time. Right now, this is my only escape from my life. My robo-parents come to me.
"Dinner's ready!" the Mom-bot says. She then pours cinnamon over my head. Wonderful. As soon as I get it off, I hear the CP-Dad say,
"Time for a board game!" I cringe at the thought of playful human activities.
"Eh…oh, yes! Mom, Dad, I left them in the kitchen. Look for it please!" I say. The robo parents just nod and go into the kitchen.
I expect they'll destroy everything in there.
I don't care right now. I miss Tak already. I want to be close to her. I just can't though. She'd never let me. I may never let myself. I don't care…
…I just know I love her.