A little bit of confusion
A/N Hello!
After the short, and secret, ceremony Loki leads Lena into a small courtyard, and sits down on a bench. It's his thinking bench, where he planned all his schemes when he was little. Lena sits down beside him, but he doesn't notice, as his thinking cap is on, and he's already thinking of a way he can make this work.
Lena sits down beside her husband, and wrings her hands in her lap. Now that's she is officially married, despite the best wishes of Odin, she wants to get out of this golden palace, perhaps even this golden city, as quickly as possible. After all, she thinks, she probably hasn't seen Odin's meaner side yet, and doesn't want to know what he would do to her once he found out she is Loki's wife.
His wife. Lena gulps at the word. It's something she never thought would describe her, especially not so soon after meeting Loki. But here she is, a grown woman, sitting next to her husband.
Lena feels a balloon of pride swell inside of her. Her father was wrong; she can look after herself. She's strong.
She looks sideways at Loki, and sees that he is still staring into space. He must be thinking, she guesses, as she can practically hear the cogs in his mind turning.
They sit in silence for a few minutes, until the lady from the hall, the one who seemed to plead with Odin, walks into the courtyard.
Loki, of course, does not react, so Lena tries to think of excuses of why they are here. She puts her right hand over her left one, to cover it.
Sif sees Loki and the girl, and breathes a sigh of relief to herself. She's been searching this palace from top to bottom for nigh on six hours, looking for one, or both, of these two.
She walks towards the bench on which the pair sit, but is taken aback slightly by the body language of the girl. It's defensive, almost, afraid. Sif blinks, but keeps on walking.
Lena looks down at her shoes as the lady approaches. Yes, she will admit it, she's scared. This lady holds herself so elegantly, and an air of importance seems to radiate off her. She's sure, if this lady finds out about the wedding, and tells Odin, that Odin will believe her.
And that is definitely what Lena does not want right now. She memorises the stitching on her left shoe.
Sif stops just before the girl, after seeing that Loki is in one of his thinking moods, and in no position to talk. She should have checked here sooner. Of course Loki would come here after his father refused to let him marry the girl; Sif saw the look in Loki's eyes, and knew he wasn't going to back down easily, and would of course come to this place to sit, and plan.
The girl looks sadder than she did in the hall, for ova vinous reasons. Sif remembers when she pleaded with Odin. Sif should have prepared a better argument. She was just laughed at. At least, she thinks, I tried, unlike the others. She doesn't blame them though. They tried to protest when Thor was told not to marry Jane, and were thrown in the dungeons. Sif wonders why she wasn't arrested. Probably because she's a girl, Sif thinks unhappily. The courts of Asgard are better than they were, but still they are pretty sexist. She will have to deal with that soon. Sure, she doesn't want to be in the dungeons, but she doesn't want to stay out because of her gender.
It's a miracle Odin didn't realise that Loki would come here., and have this place crawling with guards. Or maybe he just doesn't care. Sif is also surprised that Odin hasn't had the girl arrested. He's arrested people for lesser crimes than wanting to marry his son. Then again, could be the awful sexism coming into play.
"I'm not a child." Lena states as Sif draws near. Sif stops around a metre away from bench, and blinks again. She frowns in confusion.
"Of course." She says, as though it is obvious. "I never thought you were."
Lena finds the courage to look up at Sif.
"Yes, you do. You referred to me as 'girl' several times over the past minute or two." She glares at her, trying not to flinch. Why do these Asgardians have to be so damn regal? All of them!
Sif opens her mouth, then closes it again when she loses the words. She hasn't spoken, only thought. Another terrible thought occurs to her. What if... This girl...
Lena nods.
"Yes, I'm a telepath."
Sif loses her posture slightly as she sags, feeling the weight of the girl's pain. Sif didn't have to be a telepath to know what all those in the hall were thinking of the girl, and if the girl could hear all those thoughts, well, no wonder she looks so sad and scared. But surely she heard Sif's thought as well, Sif's thoughts which beloved firmly that the girl should marry Loki if that's what they wanted.
"Yes, those thoughts did help." Lena mutters. Then she speaks slightly louder. "But you still think I'm a girl, a child."
Sif frowns again, and tries to stand up tall.
"Well," she says. "How old are you?" She says it almost like a challenge.
Lena raises an eyebrow.
"Twenty two."
Sif stifles a laugh. She is a child.
"Barely a toddler by Asgardian standards, I'm afraid." Sif informs the girl in front of her, but kindly. She grins slightly, but stops when she sees the dark look that crosses the face of... Wait , what was her name again?
"My name is Eleanor." Lena snaps. "How old are you, if you are considered an adult? These words are most certainly laced with challenge. Lena feels her temper snapping slightly.
Sif laughs.
"1786." She tells Eleanor, laughing again when she sees her mouth drop open.
"Okay." Lena says. "You win." She shuffles up on the bench, leaving a space big enough for Sif to sit. Sif smiles, and sits. Lena feels as though she has found a friend in Sif.
"What are you going to do now?" Sif asks, and Lena can see the real concern in her eyes. Sif has been meaning to ask this for a while, and is slightly worried about what the answer might be. She is fond of Loki, and wants him to be happy. And Eleanor seems pretty nice.
"Please," Lena says as she ponders her answer, "call me Lena." Sif laughs. She doesn't think she's is ever going to get used to the fact that Lena can read her mind. Odin was wrong, Lenaisnt a normal mortal. In ways, she is more powerful than some Asgardians.
Lena stays silent for a few moments. Honestly, she has no idea what she is going to do.
"I don't know." She tells Sif, as she feels she can trust her. Sif smiles reassuringly.
"Don't worry. I know this man." She gestures to Loki. "He comes here when he wants to think, and that look, the disconnected ness, is a sign he's thinking. He will come up with something."
Lena nods, and looks down at her hands.
"I just don't want him to be upset when Odin realises what he's done. He obviously cares about his father, whatever happens between us."
Sif frowns in confusion.
"What has he done?" She asks.
In reply, Lena lifts her right hand off her left. Sif claps a hand over her mouth and gasps.
"I..." Lena stutters, feeling tears prick her eyes, as she acknowledges what she's most afraid of. "I don't want to ruin a relationship that has lasted centuries for one that will last decades. When I am dead, Loki will still be here, with no one. Odin was right about one thing. I have no place in Asgard." She turns her head away from Sif, who takes her hand.
"No." Sif says confidently. "Odin will understand. And whilst you are a princess of Asgard, you will always have a place here."
Lena tries hard to believe her. Silence falls between the two women.
Suddenly, Loki stands up, smiling, his eyes alive with energy. He does not notice the subdued emotions of the women, and his eyes completely ignore Sif,resting only on Lena.
"I have an idea!" He tells her excitedly, missing the miserable emotions radiating off his wife. "There is a castle, down in the south of Asgard, which technically, I own."
Lena frowns.
"But Odin said I could stay here." She doesn't want to leave Sif, if she's honest. She's found a friend, and she doesn't want to lose her. She gets a feeling the next few weeks are going to be a bit tough, no matter what Loki says. Also, she doesn't want the same sense of guilt she got when leaving Clint to come if she leaves Sif. They may have just met, but Lena likes Sif.
"I know Lena, but isn't Odin going to notice the ring on your finger?" A hint of tiredness creeps into his voice, but he keeps smiling.
"I could take it off." Lena says quietly, fiddling with the said object. It glitters too much for soe,one like her, it's too valuable and precious for a highly trained fighter. She never really understood what people meant when they said marriage was a new beginning, but she now she thinks she does. Lena is saying goodbye to the fighter, hello to the beloved princess and wife. She shudders inwardly at the thought of being a princess. So pretentious. But the little girl side of her loves it. She could laugh. Soon she will be twirling around ball rooms, in floaty dresses, elegant and beautiful. As if.
It's Loki's turn to frown. Why is Lena being so stubborn to leave? He thought she wanted to leave, and be as far away from Odin as possible. If not, what was the point of getting married?
Loki repeats the last point to Lena, who stays silent. Lena looks at her hands, then glances quickly at Sif, who is trying not to look awkward. Loki sees this glance towards Sif, and surprised to feel a jolt of jealousy hit him.
Lena doesn't want to leave because of Sif? Loki could scream. He threw away everything for her! His father, his reputation, everything. And she wants to stay where he thought she least wanted to be because of Sif, who she has known for ten minutes?
Lena picks up on these angry thoughts, and her head snaps up.
"No, Loki. It's not like that. Of course I'll come with you." She smiles weakly, and her heart lifts when Loki smiles back, and his thoughts focus on happier things. She feels a pang of guilt for making Loki feel like that, but it's okay now, she tells herself. As if it was that easy to let things go. Yet another of her many faults.
She stands. "What are we waiting for?" She asks, her voice unnecessarily chirpy. She plasters on a smile, and takes Loki's arm. He smiles. Lena turns her head to face Sif, who is still sitting on the bench, an uncertain look on her face. Lena knows that Sif is suspicious of her sudden agreement to Loki's proposition.
Sif tries to smile for Lena. She's not sure if her happiness is genuine at the moment, but she knows, and hopes, that one day, this girl will be happy.
Loki leads Lena away. He feels hope.