Please don't kill me! I'm beta-less for a couple of weeks and I find it really important to proof read many many times before I feel confident enough to post! Hope you enjoy! Thanks for all the reviews I got for the last chapter! Some of you seemed to like it, others to hate it, but well, there is a song in Spanish that says something about hate being better that indifference, so, thank you all!
Hours 49 and 50
I wake up with a start with. I feel lost and disoriented. Where am I? And why do I have a woman wrapped around me like a koala? And am I really outside? None of it really matters I guess.How could something that feels so right be under any means wrong, right? Then I remember it's not just any woman. It's Kate. Kate is the woman wrapped around me and with that thought, it all comes back to me. The last few days, her bruises, our kisses, that apparently senseless talk we last shared. Suddenly, I'm afraid to move. I don't want to risk waking her. It might remind her of the fact that we're still outside, and that there are still chores to be done: the dishes are here with us, there are some pots and pans waiting to be cleaned and she'd probably want to go through the whole getting ready for bed routine. And only then we'd be able to regain this amazing feeling of two bodies pressed together. After an hour of us resting like this I'm not ready to let this feeling go yet. Subsequently, I try to numb my mind again so I can quietly go back to sleep.Not an easy task if you ask this humble writer. Humble writer. The thought makes me chuckle. And the chuckle wakes her up.
"What?" She's extremely sexy while groggy with sleep. Illegally so.
"What what?" Ok, se sexy and confused. Duly noted in case it's eventually needed as vantage point.
"Really? That's what you're going with? What what?"
"I honestly don't know what you're talking about Beckett!"
"You chuckling is the reason I woke up from the amazing dream I was having. I want to know what made you laugh."
"I was thinking about how hard it was for this humble writer to try and remain quiet in order to avoid waking you."
She snorts. "Really? Humble writer? You?"
"That's what I was laughing about! I thought humble writer, and suddenly I had the image of you talking about my apparently humongous ego, and it made me snort, which subsequently woke you up, hence this silly conversation."
"You should have insisted harder on it being nothing."
"Yeah, well, I'm not really sure I could deny you anything right now, so, if you ask me what's on my mind I kind of just tell you… hope it's OK…"
"Honesty always is the best policy."
"Glad you approve."
We fall silent once again, both of us too lazy to move. "Is this a reclining seat?"
"Beckett, did you take a look at this thing? Anything built for outside weather that is as comfortable as this must be reclining. Why?"
"I don't want to go inside yet, but we should get a bit more comfortable if we're going to be here a few more hours." And with that, she stands up and gives me this exasperated look. I guess she's bossy once the grogginess dissipates. But who am I to complain really, when she's ready to stay here, pretty much as we are. So I stand up, recline the chair to a 180º position and lay back down. When she sets herself down, she's once again holding me but this time around my right side. I take a deep breath and hold her just a bit closer to me. I feel her eyes close, her breath over one side of my neck and I am content. The full moon right in front of us is just a bonus.
"Don't!"
"Don't what Kate?"
"Don't start delivering cheesy lines such as I'd give you the moon or anything like that."
"Oh Beckett, you should know me better to know YOU better than to expect for you to accept such a comment from me! Besides, I already own my very own crate on it, and eventually everything I own will be yours, so why would I get you something you already own? If anything, I was about to offer you and endless amount of nights like this, peacefully spent wrapped in each other, either here or in any other place. Preferably inside so we can be naked and hopefully breathless."
And she laughs. It's loud and care free and almost cleansing. It feels as if we're truly letting go. She tickles me. Katherine Beckett actually places her finger around my belly and evilly runs them up and down leaving me no other choice but to retaliate. When we get too breathless to continue, we call a truce and once again fall silent for a while, and I'm more than fine with that. I fear any talk we might have to be a serious one. "So… we're having dinner with the Ryan's tomorrow."
I should really learn to hold my thoughts. If her tone and the look in her face are any indication, this is bound to be a rather serious conversation. Dang. "Yep. We have to text them the place. Any ideas?"
"About that…" A moment of awkward silence. "I was thinking, maybe I should try to get Espo an Lanie to join us…"
"Wouldn't that reunion be dangerous for a public place?"
"Yeah… so, what I was thinking was that maybe we could do it here? I mean, have all the gang together and talk about everything…"
"You sure you're ready for that? I thought we weren't going to talk about any major issues until we got back from the Hamptons…"
"I don't know if I'm truly ready. But the truth is, I'm not sure I'll ever be truly ready to talk about it. And the boys deserve better. I know they are at odds with each other and I owe it to the both of them to try to fix it. And the way I see it, the sooner the better. Like a band aid right?"
"That's what I always say. Ok, so we have to make dinner plans for tomorrow. Shall we tell them the other is coming or try to hide it? Should we ask Lanie over too? I mean, Jenny is coming, it only seems fair Espo's girl gets to come too…"
"Really? Espo's girl? What does that make me? Castle's girl?"
"Only if you want to be…"
"Oh trust me Mr Castle, I do. But you better not go around telling Lanie she's somebody's girl! She'll kick your butt!"
"Yet you're OK with being my girl?"
"Well, that's because I am. Even if you haven't properly claimed me yet, I see myself as yours in some way, just like I think of you as mine. You're the guy I turn to when I need a hug, reassurance or coffee. And I'm the person you turn to when you need some advice about Alexis, when you need a distraction after spending too much time at the bank with your mother or when you need to practice you conversation-starters-skills-for-a-meeting-the-in-laws-dinner. So, in a way, we belong to each other."
"I like that idea. I really love the idea of you claiming me as your own. Because, Kate, I am. For anything you need, anything you want, I'm yours to take. I hope you know that."
"I do. And right now, I need to take your loft for a dinner to fix the mess I made between our friends and colleagues. I need your amazing cooking skills to make us a great dinner, filled with comfort food but above all, I need you there with me, acting as a buffer, shielding me from the pain I know this talk will bring me. Seeing the guys at odds with each other and knowing that I was the cause of that is going to hurt like a bitch."
"Ok, I can be all of that for you Kate. All you ever needed to do was ask."
"I know, and that's why I'm asking now."Her eyebrows make this sexy little twitch to let me know she's thinking hard. A few seconds later, I know why: "So… how should we do this? Like you say, do we tell them the other is coming? I know Lanie has to be here, they are kind of back together, and even if they weren't, she's still as good a buffer for Espo as you're for me, so if we want to keep him from murdering Ryan, she's gotta come."
"Ok, so why don't you give her a call and run this idea thru her? I'm more into hide things until they are unavoidable, but we both know that's not your way…"
"You're right, it's not, but maybe this one time it'd be a good choice…Did I bring my phone here?"
I look around for a bit and luckily I see it lying in the chair she was previously occupying. "Yep. It's right over there." I take her arm off around me and stand up to grab it. As I'm handing it over, I lean down to give her a peck on the lips, after which I turn as if to leave her alone.
"Hey! Where do you think you're going? You better come back here and perform you buffer duties right this moment."
I turn around with the goofiest smile on my face and get back down on the chair. "I didn't want to impose in your girl talk with Lanie."
"Castle, we both know you are the master of girl talk! You promised to help me with this, I expect for you to honor that promise! So get back here and help us real girls do some planning!"