I do not own claim to any of the X-Men or their universe (Isaac and Mimik are mine though) and I make no money from this. Enjoy!

Screams wake me from sleep.

I roll over to check the alarm clock and see Piotr sitting up in bed.

I glance at the door leading to the hall as the screams are stifled before turning into muffled sobs.

This is the fourth night that she has woken from nightmares...

I glance guiltily and Piotr who thankfully cannot see my face. He sighs and quietly he says, "You should speak with her."

I sit up, "I've tried, but she refuses to answer her door and the last time I tried to port in there I was nearly mutilated."

I absent-mindedly rub the scars on my chest and Piotr nods in the darkness, "There has to be something you haven't tried yet."

I flick the covers off my tail and sigh, "I think she hates me, Pete…"

He chuckles, "She cannot hate you; you are too soft and fuzzy, no? You were the one who got her to open up more and when she learned that she had upset Kitty and yourself, SHE sought YOU out to make amends."

I sigh again and lean back against my pillows, "Maybe…"

I hear the click of her door as she quickly leaves to go to her new safe haven, the gym.

I found out about her trips to the gym from Gambit. He was teaching our class about how being stealthy is all about having honed muscle memory and how we should be as diligent as Kim is and practice. Exercising when you can't sleep is a perfect way to spend the time.

The first night she had a nightmare I responded as I did before and immediately rushed to her door checking to see if she was alright. Kitty did as well and as she was shaking her awake, Kim lashed out and began to viciously attack her.

Kitty had no choice but to phase through the attacks, yelling for help until Herr Logan made me teleport him into the room. He grabbed her wrists and talked calmly to her, occasionally using her old nickname, Kitten.

As soon as she broke into tears Logan ordered both of us to go back to bed. All this because I was such a dummkopf...

But if the Professor hadn't of allowed such an unstable mutant in with the rest of us she wouldn't have had to go to such extremes.

Isaac has visited her room every day, apologizing and regaling her door with stories of the good times she had while in the facility if that was possible. He seems to know her so much better than I…

He's watched her life on a screen like a television series. That alone worries me, especially with him seeming so normal after all that he saw. He doesn't even seem to resent the fact that his father turned him into a mutant.

He explained that to Hank while I was having my nose taken care of. Apparently Hank has devised some sort of medicine that stops him from becoming his other self.

They have been trying to work with him to learn how to control his transformations as well as teaching him how to use his wings.

He seems to love it here, trottel…

.

I sit up suddenly, clamping my mouth shut; halting my scream.

Another nightmare… It's always starts in the interrogation room and then it just gets worse…

I turn, dangling my feet off the bed. I wonder who I woke up this time…

I'm sure they must be annoyed with me by now, disrupting their sleep every night.

Kitty lectured me earlier today on not how I should discuss my feelings and what not…

She just phased right through my door, but halted when she saw me glaring at her, "Hey I know what happened and I think you should talk about it."

I raised an eyebrow, "Why would I need to talk about it? I did what was required of me to aid a fellow mutant."

She sighed and sat down in my desk chair, "I know it's not that simple… You look awful and you haven't been seen since you left the danger room."

"I don't talk about feelings, I experience them and then they go away or get bottled up. That's how it's always been."

Kitty shook her head, "Bottled feelings soon come back to bite you in the butt, I mean look at the past few nights. And anyways, you have friends now; you can rely on us to talk to."

I shook my head and continued to stare at my chosen piece of floor.

"Well fine, I see you're not in the mood to talk, but you can't hide in here forever. Isaac and especially Kurt both feel really guilty and you hiding in here and ignoring them is just making them feel worse."

She got up to leave and said, "Just think about it, kay?"

She left and I was alone again until Logan brought by food.

These people … Sometimes it's so hard to fully understand them.

I sigh and get up to look for some clothes that would be suitable for my next destination.

I can't believe I acted like such a child…

It was just so disturbing being him, even if it was only in appearance. What scares me most is how well I pulled it off.

I mean I have had enough time with him to know all his subtle "tells."

I always knew when a beating was coming way before he ever made any hint at his plans. His trigger finger would twitch a few times before his whole hand curled into a fist.

I do feel bad for yelling at Kurt though…

He was just trying to help me out from the beating I took from Isaac.

Boy that kid can pack a punch. Even with my healing I'm still really sore and I still have several bruises from his stronger hits.

I will have to apologize to Kurt, eventually. Right now I still really didn't feel like talking to any of them.

Isaac has been apologizing every day and trying to tell me about some of the better things he saw me do at the facility while standing outside my door.

Kurt has also been apologizing and trying to get me to come out.

I still don't understand it, why does he try so hard?

Cyclops is probably having a field day with me up here hiding every day.

I haven't even eaten any of the food that Logan has been bring me to try and make me eat.

And then the ever polite and unnervingly calm Professor Xavier… I'm sure he's just waiting for the chance to jump into my head and prod around.

His request that I start going to therapy with him attests to that. I'm sure there is a part of him that wants to help me, but I feel like his curiosity and need to know what everyone else does is at the foremost of his priorities.

I may be giving him a bad rap but my mind is my last sanctuary.

They may have destroyed my old body and made me into this, but they could never really take away my mind.

Sure they implanted memories and had mutants fuck around in there (before I knew how to block them out) along with all the training…

Yes Sir, No Sir, Jump? How high, Sir? Kill them? In any particular order or fashion, Sir?

I know it doesn't seem like my mind was very protected, but when you are being ripped apart piece by piece, you'd be more than happy to slip into your head and just escape for a little bit.

And still after all that's happened I'm still fighting to keep the thoughts out…

The feral part of me loved those orders; tearing something open and watching as it bled onto the ground, screaming in horror.

The drugs held it in check, but how many times did I want to join Sabertooth as he did just that?

I shake my head and wrap my arms around myself, these mutants here just don't understand. Not even Logan, he's been free for too long.

Living in there for so long you just go on autopilot, eat and sleep when needed, do as ordered, take the pain, and then do it all over again.

Every so often to break up the monotony you could try to fight it, tell them no when staring down the face of a three year old holding a teddy bear soaked in his family's blood.

But in the end they always won, through pain or their pet telepaths.

There was one that they had around since they first started training me, a volunteer like Sabertooth who enjoyed adding a permanency to the training using her powers.

There was one time she even had it so when Wraith said "Sit", I would sit like a dog.

Oh how they all laughed… That is, until I finally got to meet her. Who was laughing then?

It definitely wasn't her seeing as her smug face was across the room, lovingly separated from the rest of her.

I put my hands to my face and force myself to stop thinking about all that.

Wraith was fucking with me even after death!

I won this time though…

I shrug to myself and exit my room, locking it behind me.

I quietly make my way downstairs to the elevator. Putting in the code they finally assigned me, the elevator smoothly descends into the basement.

There's another gym upstairs, but the one in the basement has all the equipment that tests high power levels and super strength and what not.

I would use the danger room instead but apparently they change the codes a lot, making thm harder and harder to crack, and I am not that good at hacking the more advanced codes.

I rub my knuckles as the elevator halts, quickly making my way down the halls to the locker rooms connecting to the gym.

Dropping off my towel on a bench, I walk straight into the room.

The smell of sweat, machines, and other odors always make my nose crinkle as I walk into it. You learn to ignore it, but it makes you wonder why they never bother with air freshener or something…

I crack my neck and stretch out a bit before heading to my first spot, the punching bag.

I slip into the familiar groove of practicing my punches and jabs, letting my mind go numb as I go into fight mode, pausing if the bag developed a hole and had to be replaced (apparently it happens a lot because they have a whole closet full of 'em).

I don't know how much time passed but after a while a noise behind me startles me and I whip around immediately grabbing the person the by throat and slamming them into the padded floor without a second thought.

"Hey! It's me!" I blink and put down my raised fist, retracting the claws that came out as well, as I stare down into Kurt's wide, yellow eyes.

"You should know better than to sneak up on someone like me…"

I stand offering him a hand as well. He takes it and grins sheepishly as he stands, "Sorry didn't mean to startle you. Nice take down by the way."

He rubs his neck to emphasize the point. He coughs lightly and glances at the several bags on the ground, "Venting again?"

Rolling my shoulder I shrug, "Kind of… Was there something you wanted? I mean, you should be getting sleep for classes and whatnot right?"

It was his turn to shrug as he looked at the ground.

He seemed to be steeling himself for something and after a moment he looks up at me and says, "I'm really sorry Kim! I didn't mean for all that to happen with Isaac, I promise I'll act more mature and I won't goof off again EVER! Can we just still be friends?"

His sudden apology caught me off-guard and after a moment I shake my head. "Look, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I overreacted and got scared of myself. I redirected that at anger at both you and Isaac and have been behaving like a child since then. So if you could, would YOU forgive ME and continue to be my friend?"

He gives me a huge grin his tail waving happily behind him; "Of course!"

He goes to hug me and I hold him at bay by his shoulders, at his confused look I say, "I am really sweaty; not really ideal conditions for close contact."

He laughs and steps back, "So now that that crisis in my life has been averted, would you like to join me for a very early breakfast?"

I glance at the clock on the wall, "No thanks, I want to finish my workout and then take a shower. Then I have to find Isaac and talk to him. Need to be mature and stop hiding in my room like a baby. Maybe dinner though?"

"It's a date!" He teleports away, adding the smell of brimstone to the mixture of scents in the gym.

I shake my head; he is such a strange person…

.

After a lot of thinking and a relaxing shower I head downstairs to the classrooms and just listen in on some of the classes.

Storm was teaching a class on Botany, Jean was talking about first aid on the field, and Cyclops was discussing tactical retreats and when to consider them.

I skipped over the others pausing outside Xavier's lecture room, smelling my intended target inside. From inside I could hear the Professor finishing up a lecture on physics.

I wait patiently, leaning against a wall, ignoring the random passerby's who stare and nodding to those who greeted me.

After a few minutes a quiet bell goes off throughout the hallway, signaling the end of class. The hall fills up with kids heading off to their next class or to go hang out somewhere in the mansion.

I had to wrap my tail around my leg because people kept jumping as they saw it move near their legs as they passed by.

As the door to Xavier's room opens a scent catches my attention; fear.

I quickly follow it around the corner, my curiosity getting the better of me.

I see a small group of students circling around the source of the scent. They are all jeering and egging someone on and underneath their calls I hear small shouts of pain.

I growl and push through the group until I am at the center.

Realizing how one-sided the fight I was witnessing was; I quickly lift the larger of the two boys off the floor, pinning him to the wall.

He is a younger boy covered in orange scales with a fin atop of his fish-like head, possibly in his early teens.

I then turn my attention to the small boy curled up on the floor, he's the little lizard boy I met on my first conscious day here.

"Are you alright kid?"

The fish boy starts to talk but I snarl at him, tightening my grip on his collar, "You be silent!"

Lizard boy looks up at me and forces a grin, replacing the pained look I initially saw, "Hello Miss Kim. I'm ok…"

I offer him my free hand and he takes it, getting up slowly.

"Why was this punk beating on you?"

He looks at the ground, remaining silent.

I turn back to fish boy, "Why were you hurting him?"

He gulps and starts stammering, "I- I – I was only playing."

"Don't lie to me bub, I can smell it."

He nods and says, "Well, he was sitting in my spot on the couch and when I told him to move he punched me, so-"

Lizard boy stomps, "Liar! When I didn't move you pushed me off the seat and then stole my Gameboy! Then I punched you."

Fish boy shakes his head and I snarl again, showing him my sharp teeth, "So you chased him out here and started beating on him. How pathetic…"

I look at those of the group who were still here, watching, "None of you are any better. Getting pleasure out of watching someone pummel a child half their size and doing nothing to stop it. I've had my fill of people like you. How can this be a safe haven when even those being sheltered here are violent towards one another?"

I shake my head in disgust and those still watching quickly depart looking guilty.

"Fish boy, what's your name?"

He gulps and stutters out, "S-s-s-Sammy, mam."

"Well Sammy, you really shouldn't pick on people smaller than yourself. Especially one's that I happen to like. You are going to give him back his game; you are going to apologize, and then you are going to go straight to Xavier's office."

He nods quickly. "And if I ever see or hear of you hurting him or anyone else again, I will enjoy a delicious fish fry for dinner, and boy do I have quite the appetite."

I inhale real deep and then lick my lips.

The scent of urine fills the air and I drop him in disgust, "Go."

Trembling he looks at lizard boy, hands him the game device saying "Sorry Victor!" and runs off.

Lizard boy or Victor looks up at me and smiles, "Thanks Miss Kim. You're not really going to eat Sammy are you?"

"Nah, that's what we call cannibalism and is in fact frowned upon in most societies…"

He frowns and then looks up with a frightened look on his face as he sees Xavier, Scott, and Isaac approaching us from around the corner.

I almost forgot I was here to see him.

I crouch down, putting a hand on Victor's shoulder, "Don't worry, you've done nothing wrong."

He nods and I stand up. Xavier smiles, "I see you have been acting as hall monitor for us this afternoon."

I frown, "Is this how you teach your students? Allow them to attack each other in the halls?"

"I assure that this was a rare occurrence and although I don't approve the means in which you solved it I appreciate the fact that you did."

Scott nods brusquely, "Everyone involved will be doing chores for a month."

"Except the kid."

Xavier smirks, "Except for Victor, Scott will be escorting him down to the med lab so he can have a brief check-up and then he is free to go."

Victor grins. Xavier holds up a finger, "But you will have to come to meet with one of the other teachers a few times to discuss why dealing with the situation with violence initially was the wrong decision."

"Bull, he had every right to defend himself."

Xavier raises an eyebrow, "If that was the case then was Sam not in the right as well?"

"Look I'm not the one who needs to be lectured, do what you will. It's your school."

Scott rolls his eyes and then walks away, calling for Victor to follow.

The lizard boy nods at me and then limps off, quickly, to catch up with his one-eyed escort.

Xavier draws my attention back to himself, "Now I was informed you were waiting outside my classroom for something."

"I was waiting for Isaac."

"Ah, I see. Well, I must leave you two anyway. I believe there is a young man waiting outside my office who may need to be reassured that he won't be visited in the middle of the night by someone hungry for his flesh."

I shrug, "I bet you, he won't be a problem anymore. Not my fault I look scary enough to follow through on my word."

Xavier just shakes his head and wheels himself back down the hall.

I glance at Isaac, "Think he'll ever be able to watch a zombie moving again?"

Isaac chuckles and shakes his head, "Doubtful, you are pretty damn scary when you want to be."

We stand there for a moment and as I hear footsteps coming down the hall I ask, "Could we go somewhere a little more private? I'm not one for making apologies out in the open."

He shrugs, "I really don't think an apology is necessary… Don't want everyone to think you're not the scary tough girl you make yourself out to be?"

I roll my eyes, "I don't give a shit what other people think."

"You're a liar, but ok, how 'bout outside, it's really cold out today so there are probably not many people out, except for maybe Ororo and Bobby."

"You seem to have gotten comfortable here."

He nods, "This place is great, and once you get to know them the people aren't half bad."

He points his thumb down the hallway behind him, "Shall we go?"

I nod and we head towards one of the side doors leading to the back garden.

Dummkopf - Fool

Trottel - Idiot