Love Struck

Chapter 186 – Thinking

Shadow's POV

I sat next to the suit and on my bed as I held the M1911 in my hands.

Smiling a bit I kept playing around with the receiver. The gun worked I knew and I was ready for tomorrow. I just loved the sound of it smacking back in place warning me that I can now have the ability to kill someone.

I checked the slide, the mag, the match, the grip, the sights. Nearly everything on this handgun I went over. The gun was never fired before in it's life. Why? You may ask. The answer is simple. It use to be Maria's.

Back on ARK the doctor who made both me and my brother...Dark gave Maria this in case of emergency. I remember asking him why he would give his little girl a gun? He replied.

"Shadow I want her to be protected at all times whenever she leaves my sight. I want to be sure she can defend herself. If you went to hurt her I want to be sure she can have a chance."

I remember staring into his eyes and replying.

"I would never hurt her."

He just laughed a bit then moved on saying.

"Just in case."

I always remembered as I kid, Maria wouldn't go near this thing. She would always lock it up away from me and Dark so we couldn't hurt anyone or ourselves.

I smiled while resting the gun down on my lap and slowly stared into nothing.

"I remember one night Dark and me managed to get our hands on it. It was so cool back then but I see guns everyday and hell I carry my own no matter where I go. It's a part of my life. But back to the gun. I remember Dark asking me to hold it while he went to see if Maria was still asleep. So I took it and as he ran off I accidentally dropped it and it misfired and hit me in the leg. Ha! I remember Dark running back with nearly everyone who heard it and they crowded around me as I cried in pain. Maria after my leg was better told me what I did was wrong. Dark never got in trouble for being away during when I got shot but I didn't care. Maria from then on locked it in that smaller box I had next to me and after the doctor tried to kill us, Maria took it and got it in the escape pod before getting me and Dark. I don't know how she knew we were in trouble but she did and made sure we were safe."

Gently I looked to my right to see the suit. I smiled remembering my senior prom.

Sonic was pissed at me back then. I'll tell you why.

Back when me and Silver and Sonic went to high school I might have asked his girlfriend out to the prom behind his back.

I smiled remembering when I picked her up at her house. God was she beautiful. Not nearly as good as Amy, but still too good for the blue hedgehog.

"What was her name? Ahhh...! Sally!" I shouted in my thoughts as I remembered walking her into the dance.

Sonic was mindless about the "time" I had with her during the prom, but Sally was a slut. So what? This is how it went down.

"I walked into the dance with her and my friends Knuckles and Espio lost their shit telling me Sonic would be there soon looking for her. I told them to basically fuck off. I was rejected by Rouge cause she wanted Knuckles and I was rejected by Mina because she was with Tails. I know what your thinking. Why am I going for all my friends girls? Its not because I was a punk like that. It was because at time they weren't going out. I only found out after wards when I was rejected. Sally on the other hand always eyed me when I was hanging around her cocky boyfriend. I saw it in her eyes she wanted me and not just my personality. In short she wanted my kids. Being young and dumb I almost did it too, but I felt I should wait. I wanted to find a girl I truly loved like Amy. She was the only one. But Sally still got something I won't lie. She...aghhhh...had a taste of me. That's the only way I can put it without saying it bluntly. It was the first time I ever had oral so of course I loved it but after she was done I felt empty sort of. She felt amazing since I was the hot one in the school, but it still didn't feel right to me. So after we got back from that break in the bathroom...yeah I said bathroom don't judge me. It was at school, where else can I do that with a girl? Anyway we got back and Sonic was there. To say it short he didn't like me holding her hand and taking our photo's together. It was funny to be honest. He tried to fight me for her, but I just said he could have her. I got what I wanted and I learned something about myself. That was I wasn't ready to have a relationship. Sonic still tossed a punch and I shoved his blue spiked head through the concession table. After that Knuckles and Silver who was with his now wife Blaze; ran me out and we left for a fun night. Sally went back to Sonic and we sort of became cool again as time went on. Trust me it's nice to know he won't be seeing me again but I still miss him. I can't believe he died though. I don't know how many times I told him to stop racing to impress Sally, but he wouldn't listen. I guess he got what he deserved though. Fate is like that. I should know by now after losing Amy and two babies."

Wiping the tears off my face from the memories, I looked back at my hand to see the scar that me and Ghost made back in Afghanistan. I cried no matter what. Blood brothers and after all we went through I killed him for Amy. "Who am I?" I asked myself as I looked away and back at the M1911 on my lap.

Taking it in my hand I listened as someone knocked on my door.

Looking up I saw Raptor who was much more clean looking at me.

"Hey." I said still in tears as he shut the door behind him.

"Hey." He replied as I urged him to come take a seat next to me.

Raptor wasn't going to ignore the request.

"You ok?" He asked as he stared into my eyes.

"Just thinking." I replied as he looked at my hand.

"What's with the gun?" He asked as I pulled it up.

"Nice isn't it?" I asked calmly as I handed it to him.

"Yeah it's one of the good models. Where did you get this?" He asked as I watched him check out the gun.

"Maria." I replied as he nodded.

"Was this hers?" He asked as I replied.

"Yeah long ago."

"I remember you telling me about that when you first met me a few months back." He stated as I smiled.

"I just wanted to think about better things." I stated as he gave the gun back.

I took it in my lap as he asked.

"Something bothering you? Is that why I'm here?"

"Neah. I just wanted to ask you something before I started to break down here." I replied as he asked.

"So what's wrong?"

"We have a problem with someone in our base." I replied getting back some control as he looked at me in confusion.

"Who?" He asked as I replied.

"I can't tell you yet."

"Why not?" He asked in confusion as I lifted up the gun again.

"Cause I'm not sure if it's who I think it is." I stated as he asked.

"Just tell me who and I'll find out."

I nodded and replied.

"No."

"Then what do you need me to do?" He asked in more confusion as I replied.

"Tomorrow at 6:30 I need you to call Blaze's phone."

Raptor listened as closely as possible as I continued.

"I want you to say you this, ready?" I asked as he nodded.

"There's been a problem with the mission. You may be in danger of being compromised." I said in all seriousness as he asked.

"What?"

"Please Raptor I need you to do this." I pleaded as he nodded.

"Ok. I can do that."

I nodded back and gave him a hug.

Raptor was caught off guard by the sudden notion as I whispered into his ear.

"Your all I have left really anymore. I need you to stay by my side through this. Please Raptor." I begged as he shook his head and hugged back.

"I got you Shadow don't worry about it." He replied as I asked.

"You promise?"

Raptor let go and stared into my eyes.

"On my life." He replied as I smiled.

"Thank you." I said as he watched me stand up.

"I need to get ready for tomorrow and catch up on some sleep."

Immediately Raptor stood and replied.

"No problem. Is there anything else you need before I go?"

Looking at him I asked.

"How do you feel about kids?"

Raptor widened his eyes at the question and replied

"What do mean?"

I got closer and replied.

"Would you ever want another kid again?"

Raptor lowered his head and thought hard.

In time he looked back into my eyes and replied.

"I don't know, why?"

Looking at him I replied.

"I don't know if you and Alicia will ever try to have one of your own, but I need to find someone who will take care of Midnight now that both her mother and father are gone."

Raptor nodded while looking downward and asked.

"Are you asking me if me and Alicia want to adopt her?"

Looking back into his eyes I nodded.

Raptor immediately began to look around the room until he replied

"I don't know Shadow. I mean I would love too, but after my first little girl I don't...!?" I cut him off by taking his shoulder.

Raptor stared into my eyes as I said.

"I'm not forcing you to make a decision now. All I'm asking is can you talk to Alicia about it?"

"Why can't you take her in? I mean Ghost would want that wouldn't he?" Replied Raptor as I lowered my head.

"I don't think he would."

"Why not?" Asked Raptor as I replied.

"I think he would want her to be away from this. I'll be here fighting the wars for maybe my whole life. You on the other hand can go and start new. I just think it would be better for her to have a life away from the fighting and with you and Alicia."

Raptor nodded and replied.

"I'll think about. Ok? I'll get back to you when I talk with Alicia."

Smiling I replied.

"Thank you Raptor."

Patting the side of my arm he went for the door and replied.

"Just get some rest."

"I will." I stated as he shut the door.

Looking away as I heard his boots leaving the halls I went to the bathroom and turned on the water.

As I got in I just went back to thinking. I was remembering all I could from my past life as a normal person.

My tears mixed with the water as I ran my hands through my fur and quills and the whole time it was just the same things. I thought, cried and thought again. It was sad to think I would never be able to see anyone again. Now that I'm here. I don't think the number one terrorist can go back to normal.

All I can do is...think.

I will have two more for you to read today.

It's narrowed down to three people. Hannon, Silver, or Blaze. Who do you think It will be.

Next chapter soon