Author's note: Lots of replies as always! You guys are so diligent in following this story. Now let us introduce a few more of the characters involved...
Oopsy, quick edit: Good news, everyone! I'm going on holiday for two weeks. I'm afraid this story won't update again until July22nd. Please don't screech too much at me.
Saving Private Soldierbot
Chapter Two: An Icy Reception
Medic Albrecht ran a gloved hand through his curly black hair, shaking the remaining snow from his locks before glaring at Soldier. Scoutbot looked at the man curiously. He was the usual Medic type, but he'd let his hair grow longer so it was a wild and crazy mess. Scoutbot thought it made him look nuts- which, admittedly, was a suitable look for a Medic. In the confused months after the death of Gray Mann, the various clones had found ways to make themselves feel at least a little unique. Most of them had different names and had changed their hairstyles or clothing. Of course, at first they had all come up with exactly the same ideas. There had been a lot of arguments. Scoutbot remembered the Institute echoing with gunfire. Scoutbot didn't really care either way- it was up to them what they did. In the end, it had all worked out with only a minimal number of flesh wounds.
The only exception were the Soldiers. They were, every one of them, simply called Soldier. Equal, identical, and, Scoutbot felt, kinda creepy.
"You said to be fast, so don't complain about my landings." Soldier stated, glaring at Medic. "Is he dead yet? I have a blanket to wrap his body in." He turned away from the annoyed German and fired a flare into the sky. It shot up and hung in the sky like a red star for a few moments.
"Zhe blanket is to keep him varm, dummkopf." Albrecht brushed some snow off his shoulder in annoyance. "Vhere is Vlad? Vlad! Wo bist du?" He glanced around himself anxiously
"You don't keep corpses warm, private. It makes them stink. And then they go slimy and wriggly. Being stinking, slimy and wriggly is insubordination of the highest level!"
"They're not dead, asshat." Scoutbot replied in annoyance, snatching a blanket from the man and wrapping it carefully around Rick, looking worriedly at the pale man. His metal hands were so cold they burned when they touched his hands, and he hissed in pain. "Sorry dude."
"Tiny Scouts are hurt!" A mound of snow shook, and a figure burst out in a scatter of whiteness.
"You're callin' them tiny?" Scoutbot asked in astonishment.
"Zhere you are, Vlad!" Albrecht ignored his patients and picked up the six-inch tall Heavy Weapons Expert carefully and lifted him onto his shoulder. "Are you alright?"
"Am fine, Doktor. Cold does not bother me. Am made for it." Vlad replied calmly, grabbing hold of Albrecht's long hair for stability. Scoutbot noticed that the Medic also had tiny loops sewn into his labcoat for the minature Russian to hold on to.
"Zhat was vhen you vere full sized!" Albrecht scolded. "Since zhe accident, your increased surface area to mass ratio means zhat..."
"Yo, doc. Patients. Help them." Scoutbot said firmly. "And, uh, hi Vlad." Scoutbot gave the diminutive man a nod. Like Scoutbot, he was one of the oddballs of the Institute, along with Jacques, who was the weirdest of all of them. We three freaks, where everyone else is the same. Albrecht's voice interrupted Scoutbot's thoughts and he looked up.
"Hrm, hypothermia, as expected, and zhat is a nasty break. Look at the angle of zhat foot!" With a pleased grin, Albrecht pointed his medigun at Rick and flipped the bulky handle. The white beam of the Quickfix hit Rick and he moaned as his foot twisted and creaked back into place, straightening with an audible crunching noise. His eyes flickered and he murmured something that sounded vaguely obscene.
"S'he ok?" Bobby asked muzzily, trying to struggle out of the blanket he had been tightly wrapped in. He gave a small, weak cough.
"Don't even zhink about taking zhat blanket off." Albrecht admonished. "He's in shock and hypothermic, as expected. Bozh of you need to be taken inside as soon as possible."
"So what happened here?" Soldier demanded, looking at Scoutbot suspiciously. The robot looked away guiltily and then cursed himself for not using his best poker face.
"Uh, training exercises. Yeah."
"Leetle machine is lying." Vlad stated.
"Hey, why would I lie? And I'm not some dumb machine. I'm a robot." Scoutbot objected.
"Everyone knows robots are no good." Soldier said, eyeing Scoutbot suspiciously. "They always turn on their masters eventually. I have watched many documentaries about it."
"Those are TV shows, Soldier." Scoutbot said tiredly. "It's not real."
"My eyes don't lie, son."
"Fuck. Off. Sol." Scoutbot replied levelly.
"Zhis is a conversation for anozher time, ja?" Albrecht said irritably. "Engineer Jed and Pyro Tianlong are on zheir vay vizh transport for zhe patients. Zhe medigun cannot heal non-traumatic conditions, but it can keep zhem stable and not-dead. I can begin real treatment once ve get inside. In zhe meantime, anybody vant some coffee?" He unscrewed the lid of a thermos.
"Me." Rick said quietly, blinking bloodshot eyes.
"Alright, but take it slowly." Albrecht replied, filling a cup carefully. There was a distant sound of a motor roaring and he looked up hopefully. "Ah, I zhink zhat is zhem."
Scoutbot looked up towards the noise, and sure enough, two skidoos towing trailers roared over the snow towards them, spraying snow like a white mist behind them. The robot's shoulder joints relaxed with relief: they were safe now, and everything would be fine.
Until Miss Pauling finds out, anyway...
"So," Miss Pauling said in that level voice she tended to use before someone got shot, "Now you're mostly better, perhaps you can all tell me what happened. No rush. It's not like I have a multi-million dollar industry to run, or anything."
The two Scouts looked at each other hopelessly. They had spent a few hours warming up in the infirmary and were now sat up in bed, still shivering occasionally. Medic had given them something hot and sickly-sweet to drink, and they took the occasional gulp with a grimace. The other people involved in the rescue mission wandered into the room behind her and found various assorted chairs to sit on. Scoutbot sat on a table opposite the two beds, swinging his legs nervously.
"Uh, well, babe..." Bobby began.
"What have I told you about calling me that?" Miss Pauling asked, tapping her nails on the desk.
"Katie..."
"Right now you call me Miss Pauling." She said icily. "Well?"
"It was..."
"...his idea..."
"...his idea..."
"Hey! It was not!"
"You liar!"
"Ah, fuck it. We were having a snowball fight." Scoutbot said in defeat. "We had nothin' to do, and it would've been fun, so why not?"
"It was Scoutbot's idea." Bobby blurted out.
"Yeah, his idea." Rick agreed with a fervent nod.
"What the hell dude! That's not cool and you know it." Scoutbot said, getting to his feet angrily.
"It don't matter whose idea it was," Engineer Jed pointed out, waving at Scoutbot to calm down. "An' I don't like all this finger pointin' anyway. The point is that it was a real bad idea."
"You went without telling anyone where you go." Tiny Vlad said from the bedside table. "Dangerous place, outside of respawn, no backup. That is bad, very bad."
"Vhen I went valking in Bavaria, it vas essential to give a friend a plan of your route and an idea of your timing, so help could be sent if anyzhing went wrong." Albrecht said, distractedly giving Vlad a miniature sandwich, which the small man accepted happily.
"It is standard practice in any manoeuvre to have a plan of action and reinforcements ready." Soldier stated sternly. "You could have been taken by enemy forces."
"There weren't any enemy forces, numbnuts." Scoutbot pointed out. "Just me."
"My God, it's just as I said!" Soldier declared, rising from his seat and cracking his knuckles. "Never trust a robot. Engie, do robots have asses for me to kick?"
"Well, son, it depends what you mean by 'ass'..."
"Not this shit again." Scoutbot replied with an electronic sigh.
"Uhhh hrrsssht srrrrrrrrh. Hrrrrrssh uhhh rrrrhhh." Pyro Tianlong said, coming over and giving the robot a tight hug.
"Thanks dude." Scoutbot said softly to the masked man, patting him awkwardly. "Uh, let go now?"
"Uhh hrrr."
"The point is that you could have been lost for good," Miss Pauling interrupted. She flicked a wisp of hair out of her face, "And we would never have known...you could have died out there." She adjusted her glasses and looked down hurriedly at her clipboard.
There was a moment of embarrassed, busy silence.
"They wouldn't have died." Scoutbot pointed out, bringing a hand to his chest with a clang. "'Cos I was there. Cold don't get to me, and I could get back to base, no problem."
"No offense, Scoutbot, but while you were built to the highest spec, every machine breaks down sometimes. Dell told me about that time you crashed, remember that?"
"Dude, seriously, it was one jet fighter. The guy had an ejector seat, so it was all ok. Anyway, he shouldn't have got in my way. It was totally his fault."
"You were scattered right across two islands and a section of seabed! Dell had to send Jacques to find all your parts. Thank God your processor case is waterproof or you'd have had serious problems."
"I knew you guys'd come and get me. Robots can never die, right? They can always be repaired. Thank fuck."
"'I knew you guys would come and get me', you say." Vlad repeated. "That is point. In Alaska, we could not have come."
"All zhree of you don't have zhe sense you were born vith!" Albrecht said in exasperation.
"Cloned with." Rick pointed out.
"Manufactured with." Scoutbot added.
"Face it guys, you acted irresponsibly." Miss Pauling said firmly. "You should have known better than this. Well, Bobby and Rick should have done anyway..." She suddenly stopped and cleared her throat.
"Wait, what?" Scoutbot asked, hopping off the table and standing up. "And not me?"
"Nobody trusts robots." Soldier muttered, tugging his helmet farther down over his eyes and crossing his arms.
"I saved your lives, remember?" Scoutbot said, waving his arms at all of them. "I killed Gray and stopped him turning you all into mince! And you still don't trust me?"
"Come on, Soldier, you know that's just plain unfair. Scoutbot has shown his..."
"Shut up, both of you!" Miss Pauling snapped. She sighed and pushed her glasses up with a small hand. "I trust you, Scoutbot, and I consider you a friend, I do. What I meant was...well, you'd not feel the cold..."
"Matter o' fact, Scoutbot runs more efficiently in cold weather." Jed added helpfully.
"So, you'd not realise it was dangerous for Bobby or Rick. I, um, don't think you'd notice the signs that they were getting too cold." She explained. "It's not your fault, not at all- they should have known better- but...even though Violet Engineer gave you human memories, just remembering cold and feeling it are two different things..." She trailed off awkwardly.
Scoutbot's shoulders slumped. "But...if I had felt the cold, I couldn't have come and gotten help...I'm not their keeper...I mean I...oh screw you guys! Fucking humans." The robot stomped out of the room, feet clattering on the tiles and slammed the door behind him. Miss Pauling winced guiltily.
"Wow, Katie." Rick said.
"Way to hurt his feelings." Bobby added.
"That was a dick move, y'know?"
"Damn." She said, letting out her breath in a sigh. "I didn't mean it like that."
"You were right though." Soldier said with a firm nod.
"Like hell she was." Jed said, pausing briefly for thought. "I don't think you're bein' exactly polite to our mechanical friend out there."
"Nrr hrr." Pyro shaking his head disapprovingly at Soldier and then Miss Pauling, who blinked and looked away briefly.
"She does have a point." Albrecht said. "Vizhout human senses, Scoutbot cannot be expected to act humanly. I do not mean he vill go on a rampage, but vhat if he tries to shake somevone's hand and crushes a little too hard? Damage due to simple ignorance, not malice."
"Ain't gonna happen." Jed said. "His actuators and pneumatics are calibrated to give him the same strength as our two Scouts here."
"I think you are unfair to our leetle metal man." Vlad said, looking at Miss Pauling disapprovingly.
"I'll go talk to him later." Miss Pauling said with a sigh. "Right now, everybody out. I have to decide what to do with these two."
"I vant to keep zhem under observation for 24 hours..."
"I said out." She ordered.
"Rrrgh. Zhis is not good medicine." Medic Albrecht grumbled. He picked up Vlad and placed him carefully on his shoulder, and the group left. Engineer Jed gave Bobby a quick pat on the shoulder and a wink before he left.
Miss Pauling waited for a moment until it had gone quiet. She cocked her head, listening for voices, and once convinced it was completely silent, grabbed Rick's shoulders and pulled him into a long possessive kiss, before turning around and planting the same kiss on Bobby's lips, holding the side of his head in a tight grip, her hands curling into his black hair.
"Never, ever scare me like that again." She said breathlessly. "I thought I'd lost you both."
"Yeah well, it wasn't much fun for us either." Rick replied.
"Hypothermia sucks donkey balls." Bobby agreed, coughing slightly. "Don't think I'll ever be warm again."
"Breaking an ankle isn't cool either." Rick added, as the woman ducked under his bed. There were four clicks. "Hon, what are you doin' down there?"
"Releasing the breaks on this bed." A muffled voice said. The bed lurched.
"Woah, are you gonna push me out the window or somethin'?"
"Don't be stupid." She popped up on the other side of Rick's bed and then determinedly pushed the two beds together. Once they met with a shudder, she nimbly clambered over Rick and lay down in-between the two men, putting an arm around each of them and dragging them both closer to her.
"You are an amazing woman..."
"...you know that, right?"
"Yes." She replied smugly as their arms folded around her. Bobby nuzzled into her neck with a murmur of pleasure. "If you give me a hickey, I'm leaving."
"Ok, ok." Bobby replied disappointedly, his voice muffled while Rick chuckled and stroked her hair.
"Now, both of you get some rest. I'll be right here."
"Katie..."
"We..."
"Mmm?"
"Uh, nothing."
"Don't matter."
"Oh, by the way." Miss Pauling said, closing her eyes contentedly. "You're both confined to the Institute for two weeks as punishment."
"...crap."
In Chapter Three: Scoutbot is fed up and annoyed, so he goes to find someone he can talk to: Jacques.