Author's Notes: Finally, here's the conclusion. My heartfelt thanks once more to Prothrombintime for gracious and unwavering encouragement, support and feedback throughout the writing of this story.

And thank you again to everyone who has read and supported this story along the way. I really do hope it's been an enjoyable and rewarding journey.

Chapter Sixty

November 16th, 2008

Jack was sitting on a bench in the now familiar park, staring distractedly into the distance as he struggled to keep his anxiety from getting the better of him. It was the same bench where he'd first seen Ianto sitting only weeks earlier, looking so utterly lost and alone. It was also the same bench where they'd met for what he'd thought was the first time the following day. His throat grew tight as he remembered that fateful meeting, and he swallowed hard against the sudden rush of emotion.

He'd barely slept or eaten in the four days since he'd last seen Ianto, his mind refusing to settle as he tried to make sense of everything they'd discovered. Finding out he was a clone of his former self had been both shocking and disturbing, and it would take time to come to terms with that, but it wasn't the strangest thing that had happened to him in his long life. It was the price he'd had to pay to be released from the curse of immortality. He was pragmatic enough to accept that it was by far the lesser of two evils.

When he did manage to briefly lapse into unconsciousness, his dreams were consumed with a kaleidoscope of fragmented, shifting images. Just as he'd thought his new life was beginning to make sense, with the possibility of happiness dangled so temptingly within his grasp, he once again found himself adrift in a sea of confusion and uncertainty.

Ignoring the nervous churning in his stomach, he closed his eyes and took several slow, deep breaths. When he opened his eyes again, he spotted a solitary figure heading slowly towards him. His heart leapt at the sight, and he rose to his feet, forcing himself not to rush forward and grab hold of the other man.

Finally Ianto reached him, coming to a halt and looking at him cautiously. The Welshman looked about as good as Jack felt, his features tired and drawn, and a wariness in his eyes that filled Jack with a cold sense of dread. He wondered if he was imagining a glimmer of distrust in the way Ianto looked at him, as if he was looking at a total stranger. In many ways, Jack supposed he was.

"Thanks for meeting me here, Ianto." Jack gestured at the bench. "Do you want to sit down?"

Ianto nodded and lowered himself onto the bench, near to one end. Jack joined him, sitting close, but trying to keep a respectable amount of distance between them. He hated this sudden awkwardness and tension when they'd previously been so comfortable and relaxed around each other. He couldn't help feeling resentful that the carefree happiness he'd found with Ianto had been so fleeting.

"I was going to call you sooner," Ianto began quietly. "It's just..."

"It's okay," Jack assured him. "You needed time to process everything. I did, too."

Ianto nodded distractedly and fumbled with the small paper bag he was holding. "I bought you some coffee."

He extracted a foam cup from the bag and passed it tentatively to Jack, removing a second cup for himself, then folding the empty bag neatly and putting it on the bench beside him.

"Thanks." Jack popped off the lid and took a small sip. It was from their usual coffee shop and tasted good, but he couldn't help wishing it was Ianto's own inimitable brew. "Mmm. It's good, but not as good as yours."

Ianto just sipped from his own cup, looking into the distance and not meeting Jack's gaze.

"How are you, Ianto?" Jack asked hesitantly.

Ianto frowned. "I'm... confused, I suppose. After these last few days, I'm not sure if I know what's real any more."

"Yeah, I can understand that," Jack agreed with a small sigh. He gestured between the two of them. "But this... us... it's real, Ianto."

"Is it?" Ianto asked sharply, looking at Jack. "Everything we thought we know about each other is a lie, Jack. We've been lying to each other from the moment we met. Well, met for the second time, that is."

Jack couldn't help flinching from the harshness in Ianto's voice. "We've kept our pasts from each other. But everything we've shared since we met right here... none of that was a lie." He looked intently at the younger man. "Not for me."

Ianto sighed and stared down at the cup of coffee in his hands. "You're right. We were both just trying to leave the past behind and start new lives." He shook his head, looking frustrated. "It's all so bloody overwhelming."

Jack nodded, but uncertain of what to say, he remained silent and sipped at his coffee.

"I've missed you," Ianto murmured, breaking the silence a few moments later, his voice so soft that Jack almost missed the words. Nonetheless, he felt a spark of hope ignite in his chest.

"I've missed you, too," he replied, struggling to keep his voice even.

"I've been reading my diary," Ianto continued, after a moment. "I wrote a lot about you... about my feelings for you." He paused and looked up at Jack, uncertainty flickering over his features. "I loved you."

"We loved each other," Jack said firmly, knowing it was the truth.

"Past tense," Ianto murmured, lowering his eyes again.

"I don't want to presume," Jack countered, a little more defensively than he'd intended. When Ianto didn't respond, he sighed and then asked, "Have you remembered anything?"

Ianto shrugged. "Not really. A few images... more feelings than memories. It's just fragments... disjointed... incomplete. I see you in my dreams... I see us together. I know we were happy together... that we were always there for each other. But there was a lot of sadness, too. With the way you used to be, I don't suppose it was ever easy for us." He looked at Jack curiously. "What about you?"

"Yeah, the same," Jack replied. "Mostly fragments. It's all pretty vague. Like you said, more images and feelings than actual memories. I know you made me very happy. I know I loved you, and that my feelings for you terrified me. I know being with me wasn't easy for you. I know I struggled with that... I didn't want you to give up your chance for a normal life to be with me."

"I keep thinking about how terrible it must have been for you all those years," Ianto murmured, compassion filling his eyes and causing Jack's heart to ache. "I can't imagine what it was like. Knowing you'd lose everyone you ever cared about."

"It was unbearable," Jack said, his voice faltering. "The only way I could cope was to keep my distance... not let myself get too attached to anyone."

Ianto nodded. He sipped at his coffee for a minute, his expression pensive. "Do you think we'll ever get our memories back?"

Jack sighed heavily. It was a question he'd been asking himself a lot. "It's impossible to say. The Doctor might have helped nudge things along, kind of like unlocking a door. But retcon can be unpredictable, especially when it's used in such high dosages. Maybe in time we'll get some of it back."

Ianto remained silent and just nodded again in reply.

"I made a call to Cardiff last night," Jack said slowly, causing Ianto to look up at him with a surprised expression. "I spoke to Toshiko Sato, she works for Torchwood Three. She was a member of our team, we recruited her. Anyway, we talked for a while and she helped to fill in some of the gaps. You can talk to her, too, if you like. It might help."

"Toshiko," Ianto murmured. "Tosh." A small smile crept over his lips. "She was a good friend. I remember that."

"She asked about you, wanted to know if you were okay. She was very happy we'd found each other again, she said we were good together. She said she misses us, that it hasn't been the same since we left. And she told me what happened while I was gone." Jack paused and closed his eyes, remorse and guilt rushing over him as he recalled Toshiko's account of the time he'd been away and how much Ianto had suffered. "Toshiko told me about Myfanwy and how devastated you were when she died. That was when you decided to leave."

"Myfanwy," Ianto said softly, his voice catching. "She died in my arms. She was... she was beautiful, Jack." His eyes began to glisten, and Jack longed to take him into his arms and comfort him. "I remember that I took care of her. I wanted to keep her safe... protect her from the world."

"You loved her," Jack said, recalling disjointed images of the prehistoric creature that had come through the Rift and the way Ianto had always doted over her. "And she adored you."

Ianto rubbed roughly at his eyes. "I remember a warehouse. That's where we found her. We were both on the ground and I was kissing you. I think that was our first kiss?"

Jack nodded. "The warehouse... yeah. I've seen it in my dreams. I think you're right." He smiled softly. "If that kiss was anything like our first kiss three weeks ago, it must have been incredible. I bet you turned my world upside down."

A small, wistful smile graced Ianto's lips. "There was a lot of kissing. There were a lot of other things, too." He chuckled slightly. "A lot of sex... a lot of being naked."

"Yeah." Jack chuckled as well. "Well, that definitely sounds like us. Nice to know some things don't change."

They stared at each other for a long moment, both smiling.

Ianto finished drinking his coffee, putting his empty cup on the bench beside him. "Jack, what happened when you came back? Before you came to London?"

Jack swallowed the last mouthful of his own coffee, and Ianto silently took the empty cup from him, putting it inside his own. "Toshiko said I was devastated that you were gone. I decided I had to leave, too. I suppose I couldn't stay there, surrounded by all my memories of you. Plus, I was mortal again. I think I decided it was time to move on."

"We missed each other by only three weeks," Ianto muttered, self-reproach and bitterness in his voice. "If only I'd waited just a little bit longer. I shouldn't have given up on you. All of this, it's my fault."

"Hey, that's not true," Jack assured him, not wanting Ianto to blame himself. Wallowing in their respective guilt and regrets wasn't going to do either of them any good. "I know what it feels like to be abandoned, and you had no way of knowing if I'd ever come back. I don't blame you for leaving, Ianto. And I'm so sorry for the pain I caused you."

He broke off and gazed at some distant passersby as he tried to gather his composure. Taking a slow, steadying breath, he looked at Ianto again. "Fate conspired against us... tore us apart. But fate also brought us back together. We've been given a second chance. I'd like to think that means something."

"That's what the Doctor said... that despite how wildly improbable it was, we managed to find each other again," Ianto said hesitantly. "He said that maybe the universe is trying to tell us something." He closed his eyes for a moment, drawing a deep breath. "So what happens now?"

"Well, the way I see it, we have three options," Jack replied, steeling himself.

Ianto nodded. "All right. Go on."

"Option one," Jack said, trying to keep his voice steady and unemotional, but absolutely certain he was failing. "We go our separate ways. Never see each other again."

Ianto's eyes widened with a look of alarm. "Is that what you want?"

"No, Ianto," Jack said firmly, relieved that Ianto seemed to find the suggestion abhorrent, and feeling that small spark of hope strengthen. "That's not what I want. Not at all."

Ianto's expression cleared a little, but he was still looking at Jack anxiously "Right. So, option two?"

Jack took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "We go back to Cardiff. Return to Torchwood and resume our old lives."

"The familiar surroundings might help with getting our memories back," Ianto said slowly, looking contemplative. "But I don't think I want to go back. Too much has changed and I erased that entire part of my life. I wouldn't be going back to anything I knew. It's different for you though." He frowned. "Do you want to go back?"

Jack chuckled wryly. "My sense of self-preservation isn't what it once was. Knowing my luck, I'd probably get mauled to death by a Weevil on my first day back."

"Jack... don't." Ianto swallowed visibly, suddenly looking distressed. "I've seen images of you dying. In my dreams. Over and over again. I remember how I felt when you died. I was terrified every time that you wouldn't come back."

"Sorry," Jack murmured. He'd grown so used to treating his deaths with casual indifference, he'd forgotten what it was like for someone else. He supposed he just wasn't used to having someone who cared much about whether he lived or died. "But to answer your question, I don't think I want to go back either. I've worked for Torchwood for over a hundred years. Finally I've got a chance for a different kind of life. A normal, mortal life. Maybe that's selfish, but..."

"No, Jack," Ianto said insistently, shaking his head. "It's not. You deserve to have whatever life you want. You've done enough... given enough. More than enough."

Jack felt a rush of gratitude for the younger man. He realised he'd needed the reassurance that his life was finally his own, and Ianto had just given him that without the slightest hint of hesitation.

"We could take retcon again," Ianto said, looking thoughtful. "Just enough to wipe out these last few days. Go back to being James and Dylan... go some place where there's no chance of anyone knowing who we really are."

Jack looked at Ianto in surprise. It wasn't an option he'd considered, but he couldn't deny the appeal of going back to a state of blissful ignorance. "We could," he agreed tentatively. "If that's what you really want... I'd be willing to do that."

It was Ianto's turn to look surprised. "You would?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah."

Ianto stared at him with a speculative expression, but finally he shook his head. "No. It's tempting, but we know the truth now, and retcon's what got us into this. Besides, there would always be the chance we'd find out again. Then we'd be right back here."

"True," Jack agreed, feeling a twinge of disappointment, even though he knew it wasn't a wise option. But a part of him longed to go back to the way things were only days earlier. "No retcon, then."

"Jack, what's the third option?" Ianto asked.

Jack reached into the pocket of his jacket and extracted the contents. "The third option is that we follow our dreams." He held out an envelope and smiled tremulously. "Here. Not Paris this time."

Ianto stared down at the envelope in Jack's hand. Finally he took it and opened it slowly, his eyes widening when he'd revealed the contents. "Two plane tickets to Rome," he said softly, looking up at Jack with obvious astonishment.

"The flight leaves the day after tomorrow." Jack shifted closer to Ianto and placed his hand on the Welshman's knee. "Ianto, we might never get our memories back, but the feelings are still there. When I look at you... when I touch you... kiss you... make love to you... when you roll your eyes at me... when I see that gorgeous smile of yours. It's all there. I don't need the memories of our years together at Torchwood to know how I feel, and none of it's the past tense for me. No one has known me the way you do, and when I'm with you I'm happy... happier than I've ever been."

He paused and looked at Ianto anxiously, his heart pounding in his chest. "I want to show you the world, Ianto... take you to every place you've ever wanted to see. I want us to have a home together somewhere. I know it won't be easy after everything that's happened, and I know I'm not an easy person to love. But I want us to build a life together. I'm kind of hoping you want that, too."

Ianto stared at him incredulously, slack-jawed and seemingly lost for words. "Do you really mean all of that?" he finally asked, his voice little more than a whisper.

"Every word," Jack said sincerely. "So... what do you think?"

Ianto looked down at the tickets again, then he looked back up at Jack. Slowly, a warm smile spread across his face and he put his hand over Jack's, intertwining their fingers together. "Okay," he said softly, squeezing Jack's hand.

"Okay?" Jack asked, holding his breath.

"Okay," Ianto repeated, more firmly, still smiling at him.

Jack stared dumbly at the younger man, his mind struggling to comprehend what had just happened. A choked laugh bubbled up from deep inside him and burst free. He stared into the expressive blue eyes he knew so well, feeling a profound sense of peace wash over him, unlike anything he'd known before. For the first time in almost as long as he could remember, being in love didn't completely terrify him.

With a broad smile tugging at his lips, Jack took Ianto's face in his hands and kissed him fiercely, feeling a rush of excited anticipation for the life they were about to embark on together.