Chapter 13

Waking up to a dark and damp cave was not the ideal fantasy. Although, there was an entirely different fantasy on my side. Addie's bare leg was wrapped around my waist again and her face was buried deep into my neck. I took a deep breath and smelled the faint scent of banana yucca.

She stretched with a long groan and settled back into my side. I rubbed my fingers along the curve of her stomach. Her breath was against my neck, even through the gauze.

Speaking of the gauze, I hadn't changed it in two days. It was beginning to itch and feel wrong. It desperately needed to be changed. Addie has never seen me without the gauze, but I wasn't ready for her to see me. I never knew what she would do or say when presented with something new. Something told me she wouldn't be phased by my burns, but there was that nagging feeling that she might realize what she was getting into.

Addie made me afraid of things I hadn't been before. When she had been poisoned, I had never been afraid of losing someone to death before. Now knowing that I know she'll have to see me without the gauze some day made me paranoid that she'll run away.

This was just another punishment. If I lose her because of my appearance, then I still have yet to pay for my sins. I shall accept that with dignity.

For the mean time, I will enjoy and savor her presence. I tugged the gauze covering my lips and jaw down gently and kissed her on the forehead, eliciting a small giggle. Her eyes fluttered open and looked up at me sleepily.

"Good morning," she whispered, settling back into my neck.

"Good morning, Addie."

"Mmm, what time is it?"

I lifted her Pipboy and turned the knobs to find the time. "It's almost nine."

She shot up on the cot like a bullet. "We slept in so late!"

I rubbed her back and shushed her. She grumbled and laid back down next to me. I rolled over and pulled her closer, mimicking her sleeping position. I pressed my scarred lips to her bare shoulder.

"Already?" She smiled.

I didn't answer verbally. I moved to her throat and she bent her head back for better access. My lips grazed the curve of her neck just slightly. My hand resting on her lower back pulled her closer and the other wrapped in her hair tightly.

She hooked her leg around my waist with a moan. My hand moved lower and around towards her center. A gasp escaped her parted lips when my thumb grazed her bud. My other thumb was brushing her bottom lip. Her eyes locked with mine in the midst of heated passion.

"Joshua."

I pushed a finger in her core, earning another gasp. "Yes?"

She caught herself before speaking. "I love you."

I stopped moving, one thumb resting on her chin and a finger down under. "You what?"

"I said 'I love you'." Her voice was heavy with lust.

I don't know why, but this information seemed to change everything. This would no longer be just casual sex that was normal in the wasteland. This would be two people involved with only each other for as long as they deemed right. I have never known love. Women feared my touch before the fires, something I still dread thinking about. But Addie was never afraid of my touch, she enjoyed it. She craved it.

She was mine. And she loved that she was mine. She loved me.

My silence was misinterpreted as rejection instead of shock. Addie looked away and apologized. She excused herself and moved to get leave to God knows where. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. She fell on top of me with a whimper.

My lips crushed to hers with new motivation. She ground her hips against mine roughly, feeling my arousal. Her lips parted and I dragged my tongue across her teeth. She moaned into my mouth. She tasted like fruit.

"No one has ever loved me before. Forgive me for my behavior." I mumbled in between gasps of breath.

She didn't speak, she just returned to our previous activity. She rubbed her opening down the length of the underside of me. A hiss slipped out through clenched teeth. She bit my bottom lip roughly and tugged on it slightly. The mixture of pain and pleasure was almost surreal.

I wrapped my hand in her hair again and pulled her head down to whisper in her ear.

"I love you, too."