"I want her to know that there will never be a story that she won't be a part of, that she's everywhere like sky."

- Jandy Nelson, The Sky is Everywhere

38

We had a lineup of birthdays in our family. Ben in June, Alice in July, Edward, I had learned, was August, Jasper and me both September, Rose and Renee in November, Emmett, December, and Charlie in February, only a few weeks before we had lost Rose.

I was conscious of making sure Alice's birthday was special for her, as I knew Jasper was too, of course. Edward's was already on my mind as well, amongst park visits, diapers and days on Bainbridge for the filming of the screenplay. I was looking forward to sharing it with him, and I already had a number of things planned.

Alice wanted simple, which was understandable. Jasper and I planned for drinks and presents at their place, followed by dinner at her favorite Italian place next to the Market. Ben's godmother Sarah offered to leave her hubby with their kids and babysit Ben for the night so that Emmett could join us for dinner.

Charlie came by to pick up Em and me so we could both drink. Edward was coming straight from work. We sat in the kitchen while Em was showing Sarah where all Ben's necessities were.

"So, how's it going with the dashing doctor?" Charlie asked me.

"Did you just use the word 'dashing,' Charlie Swan?"

"Come on, even your dad can't ignore that he's rather a refined and handsome guy. You'd probably have some blasphemous type of slang for it no doubt." He side-eyed me. The father of three girls had heard his fair share of incomprehensible talk in his time.

I laughed at him, a shocked laugh that bordered on hysterical when it resonated around the kitchen. He's so funny when he's frank and has these little heart-to-hearts that are un-tinged by sorrow. It was so like before and I loved it. It didn't make me reminiscent, it just made me pleased that Charlie seemed to be in a better place.

"I can't even pretend to warn you against this one, Bells." He sighed, but the discussion was still light. "I think he might be a keeper, if you do as well of course. A bit of a catch as your Grandma would have said. But, I guess…you know. Be careful and all that. You're still number one, no matter how dashing he is."

"Thanks, Dad. I think he's pretty all right too." My face betrayed my understatement. He knew it, but said no more.

Dinner was delicious and talk flowed easily amongst us. It was almost like old times, apart from the glaringly obvious difference of one new face and one missing face. One of those was a very welcome change, and I absorbed the little moments like Edward's hand finding mine under the table. He got along so well with Jasper and Emmett, I could see the three of them becoming firm friends. I couldn't stop the ever present echo of if only Rose were here from filtering through. No one mentioned it, but it was written on everyone's faces from time to time.

Some of Renee's case had been wrapped up that week, but we didn't discuss it. We had avoided anything we could to do with the aftermath of the guy who was there when she got shot and who had fired one of the bullets. We knew the summary, but other than that, we needed to cleanse the unnecessary emotional baggage of that situation. All I needed to know was that as of that week, he was staying behind bars, and the scumbag boyfriend was six feet under somewhere.

Edward drove me back to his place after dinner, something that had been happening quite frequently of late. I walked past the script with my name on it laying on his coffee table. He'd been reading it and talking to me about my passion for books, film, and writing. I had partially closed this part of me off, but I knew now that it was important to stay true to what I had loved and what Rose had been so proud of me for. It was always strange that it had been a side of me that Renee had never bothered to know. Now, with Edward, it was awesome to be able to share it with someone outside of my family who was just as enthused and supportive.

He caught my hand as I brushed past him to clean my teeth in his master bathroom.

"You've got a different glow about you today," he said softly, studying my face. His hand snaked around my hip. "I think it's partly the day at work doing something that excites you."

"I don't think I've 'glowed' at all recently, have I?"

"Only at certain times, but I don't think you know it happens. It took me a few months to decode your true faces, because I realized the one I first met had been colored by your recent experiences."

"When have I glowed?" I asked, curious.

"When you've seen me." He smiled coyly.

"I don't even think you're blowing your own trumpet by saying that." I laughed at his honesty. "I think it's probably just the truth. Well I hope it is…I want to glow when I see you. I'm glad it happens unconsciously."

"Be assured that even when you're not glowing, you're beautiful."

"Don't fill my head with cotton candy air," I whispered bashfully, rising up on my toes to place a kiss on the tip of his nose.

"I wish more people would tell you, so you knew it was true. Well, not other handsome doctors, but…"

"Shh, you goof. It only matters to me when it comes from you."

"I'll tell you all the time then."

He melted into me with his lips and body pressed close, picking me up and promptly diverting me to his bed.

Two weeks after Alice's birthday she called me with the best news we'd had in a long time. Her joy was my joy when she told me that a little Whitlock was due to join us by April.