Playlist: Don't Look Back in anger by Oasis, You Found Me by The Fray
Chapter 8
2008
Edward and I manage to be cordial with each other throughout the game. I can't be sure, but I'm almost positive he keeps sneaking glances my way, checking me out or something. It's weird considering what happened between us. But I don't say anything. I miss the way he used to look at me. The way he used to stare.
"So Angela and I talked earlier, and we all want to go get drinks," Alice says.
"That's fine with me."
"Yay!" she bellows, and Jasper slips his hand into hers, pulling her along. She links our arms and chats the whole way to the parking lot, Edward silently beside me. Is he coming, too?
Alice and Jasper veer off, and Edward stays by my side, walking with me. "This is mine," I say, gesturing toward my car.
"Okay. I'll see you there."
"You're going?"
"Yeah."
I'm glad. I'm curious and want to know more about his life. What's happened to him for the last ten years? Any girlfriends? Crazy drunken college stories? I want to know it all, but I know I won't ask. I don't have it in me because I shouldn't care, even though I do.
I unlock my door and open it, my foot inside when he says, "Hey, do you think . . ." He looks away then back again, tucking his hands in his pockets. "Can we talk? Just you and me? Maybe later? After drinks?"
"Is that a good idea?" I don't know if he still uses or drinks or what. In fact, I've never seen him loaded, but for all I know he's a raging alcoholic. Will he be coherent enough after visiting a bar to talk?
"I'd really like to clarify some things and um, apologize. If you'll let me."
I nod—it's all I can do—and get in my car alone.
1996
"Aren't you guys going?" Esme asks, stirring something delicious on the stove.
"I'm waiting for Edward," I say.
"Mmm. You guys are getting pretty close."
"I guess so." I try for nonchalant.
She looks over her shoulder and gives me that I-know-you're-playing-it-cool mom look.
I roll my eyes. "I like him."
Another look.
"What? I like him a lot, okay?"
"I didn't say anything."
I hate that. She's right. She didn't say anything.
"You know, I don't know where he came from. He's so charismatic and thoughtful. You know he bought me more of those ceramic bears for my brown sugar container. Carlisle threw mine out. Thought they came with the brown sugar. Can you believe it? What a dope."
I laugh. I can totally see Carlisle doing that. Adding brown sugar to his oatmeal and just chucking the dumb foo-foo bear.
"Sometimes I think Edward was born into the wrong family. I love my sister, but she's . . . there's no way to say it. She's pretentious and boring and doesn't have a nurturing bone in her body. Poor Edward. And that man of hers? Snore. Edward must be so lonely there. I'm surprised he didn't come running to us sooner."
"I wouldn't have minded that."
"I bet," she says, laughing.
"What are we betting about?" Edward asks, waltzing in, dressed and ready to go. He snags his wallet from the counter and situates his chain appropriately. I love that chain. I like to tug on it until he gets irritated and kisses me.
"We're betting about how long it will take Carlisle to notice I painted the bathroom." She lies easily. One more reason to admire her.
"You painted the bathroom?" he asks.
She elbows him, and he wraps his arms around her shoulders, giving her a squeeze. She lifts her spoon for him to take a bite, and he hums appreciatively. "Why can't my mom cook like this?"
"Why cook when you have the money to eat out regularly? I wouldn't," she says.
"Yes, you would," Edward says. "'Cause you're cool like that. And by cool, I mean human."
"You hear that, Bella? I'm cool. And human."
"I know. I've known forever. It's Alice who's in denial about the coolness. Although between you and me, it's Carlisle that's more embarrassing to her."
She holds her spoon up, close to her chest, grinning with pride.
Edward leans down and licks it.
"Ugh. Now I have to clean it," she whines, but her grin belies her words. She loves having Edward here as much as I do.
"It was going to drip." He goes to the fridge and pulls out the juice, taking a swig from the container.
"I see that," she says, washing her spoon.
"How is that possible?"
"I had three teenage sons, Edward. I know everything that happens in this house." She turns to face us and points her spoon between the two us. Oh my gosh.
"You ready?" he asks.
I jolt to his side declaring, "Yep," meaning get me the hell out of here.
-OP-
I'm curled up in my warmest coat and Edward's arms. We're on a scratchy wool blanket on the football field, lights out. Stars litter the sky. It's so much prettier than the party decorations Lauren used for her annual New Year's party. Edward dragged me out after a whole twenty minutes with a smirk and a "Wanna go somewhere?," and I was sold. So here I am.
"What do you think everyone else is doing?" I ask.
"Who cares? They're probably all drunk." He scratches his stubble, and I want to lick it. I've wanted to lick a lot of things lately.
"Do you think Alice will be safe?"
"Jasper's a good guy, and Alice can take care of herself."
"Edward," I say, draping myself over his chest and playing with his hair.
His hands go to my hips, and he gives me a half smile. "What?"
"When did you know who I was?"
"When I moved here?" His eyes flash with the memory, and he laughs.
"Yeah. When did you know I was me?"
"Mmm, right about when you started to talk. You always had this sort of get-it-done-and-don't-mess-with-me way about you. You were telling Alice what she should do, and that was familiar. You were always trying to boss us around, making forts and stuff."
"Forts are cool," I say, feeling foolish he knew who I was and a bit embarrassed that I was rude when I was younger. But as an only child, mostly taking care of myself, I became independent fast. Which is great, but it also made me a little impatient with immature peers.
"We should make a fort," he declares.
"Sure. Let's do that." I chuckle at the idea. It's freezing; I don't want to move.
"I'm serious. Come on."
Edward pulls up his blanket, and we duck under the bleachers, attaching the cloth to various beams above us. We sit beneath it, blackness encasing us.
I don't know if it's being this close to Edward or the darkness, but I feel bold. And I begin to talk, to seek answers to questions that have been plaguing me as of late. "What are you thinking for college?"
"I'm not sure. My dad can send me wherever. I've put in a few applications, but I dunno. I might just stay local and go to the U."
"Do you want to go to the U, or . . ."
"I want to stay local." I can't make out his eyes, but I know his gaze is on me. "I want to be close to family and friends and you."
"You do?"
"Yeah."
"Does that make us official then? If you're planning your future based on me, then . . ."
"Maybe."
I smack him in the chest blindly, and he grabs my hand, rubbing it, laughing. "You're such an annoying boy."
"And you're such a girl. Who cares about this boyfriend/girlfriend crap?"
"I don't. Not really."
He nudges me with his elbow. "Yeah you do. I won't tell anyone."
I chuckle, but I'm glad. I'd hate it if my cover was blown. I'm the girl who solely believes in practical things, like grades and extracurricular activities because they look good on transcripts. But I also believe in having fun. And kissing. Lots of kissing.
I never thought I'd believe in love. Believe it could grasp me, catch me in its claws and devour me so fiercely it's all I think about. But it has. And I do. All I think about anymore is Edward and how I love him. And if that makes me weak or makes me a disgrace to women, then so be it. Because I'm not giving it up.
"Why are you friends with all your friends?" he blurts.
"Um, what a strange question."
"I don't care. It felt deep, like it went with your question. So why?"
"I'm not. I'm friends with Alice. I'm okay friends with Jasper. He makes me laugh."
"I make you laugh."
"You do make me laugh."
"Am I your friend?"
"No."
"No?"
"No. You're my boyfriend."
"I'm never gonna live this down, am I? Bella Swan, junior at Forks Podunk High, has turned me into a boyfriend. Willingly. My friends back home would beat my ass for this."
"Well, then they're not very good friends, are they?"
"Why's that?" He's laughing at the stupidity of this conversation. I am, too, but I like where it's going, so I keep at it.
"Because they don't see how good we are together."
"We are, aren't we?"
"We don't argue like those other lame couples."
"No, I guess we don't, do we?"
"And we keep each other straight."
"I don't think there's any denying I'm straight." He pulls me onto his lap with a grunt and a lift of his hips. Definitely straight.
"You know what I mean. We," I place my hands on his shoulders, my forehead against his, "we're good together."
"We are." Edward leans in. A soft kiss on the corner of my mouth makes me want more, so I take it. "So good," he whispers when we're apart, and I know he means it. Because I know him. And because we are good together.
-OP-
When I start shivering, Edward decides it's time to head home. We pause on the overpass like usual. We're wrapped up in the blanket together—his chest against my back—looking out over the road.
There's not much traffic since everyone's partying so the air's relatively still. Quiet. Until the first crack of the night explodes before us. Up above the tree line, the sky shines with gold and blue and red, sparkles falling to the earth in patterns of celebration.
"So beautiful," Edward says, lips right at my ear.
"Isn't it?"
"Yeah, I love it." His warm lips caress the shell of my ear, making me shiver. "I love New Year's. There's a promise of a kiss."
I turn my head to catch his eyes. They're on me, the fiery reflection of the sky's there along with something else I can't place. And then his mouth is on mine. Slow. Warm. But creating a fireworks display in my body.
He turns me inside the blanket and presses me against the chain links of the overpass. "Happy New Year," he says, his eyes darting to my lips.
"Happy New Year," I echo and kiss him until the sky is quiet again. And the night is still and calm.
A/N: Reviews are better than confessions of a boyfriend.
So we're more than halfway there, folks. I hope you're enjoying the ride.