I sat alone and stared blankly at the wall in front of me. Seeder looked helplessly at me—she had been my mentor during the Seventy-fourth Hunger Games and the 3rd Quarter Quell aka the Seventy-fifth Hunger Games and had taken me in after the Second Rebellion, when I had no one else to turn to and had lost everyone I had loved—she had no clue how to help me now. I had been broken—possibly beyond repair. My entire family—Mom, Dad, Rae, Rose, Ricky, Robbie, Ryan, and—I forced myself to think the name of my favorite sister and little helper—Rue—was dead. I gulped and choked back a sob and a sad song rose from my heart. "If you hear a voice in the middle of the night say and it will be all right, it will be me. If you feel a hand guiding you along when the path feels wrong, it will be me. There is no mountain that I can't climb. For you I'd swim through the rivers of time. As you go your way and I go mine, our light will shine and it will be me. If there is a key that goes to your heart, a special heart, it will be me. If you need a friend, call out to the wind to hold you again, it will be me. Oh, how the world seems so unfair, creating a love that cannot be shared. As you go your way and I go mine, our light will shine and it will be me. I steal ever after. There's a place for two. Hear the old tears of laughter, I'll be there for you—in the sun and the moon, in the land and the sea—look all around you. It will be me. There is no mountain that I can't climb. For you I'd swim through the rivers of time. As you go your way and I go mine, our light will shine and it will be me. It will be me. It will be me."
A mockingjay entered and I cried, "She's dead! She's never coming back! Rue is gone!" It chirped at me and I followed it out of District 11. Thus my journey began.
I sighed and slowly began to sing, "Little brother, I remember when you first came home. Then came another little brother of our own. Even when you break my toys, you will always be my little brothers 'cause you're younger, we're related, and you're boys. Even when you're making too much noise, you will always be my little brothers 'cause you're younger, we're related, and you're boys. Little brothers. Little brothers. Little brothers."
I listened as the mockingjays all took up my song. I smiled weakly—it didn't reach my eyes—no emotions had since Rue's death in a bombing in the Capitol.
I numbly began singing a second song—a song that Rue and I had loved—when one of us was feeling down or was sick, we'd sing it to cheer each other up. "The morning cold and reigning dark before the dawn would come. How long in twilight waiting longing for the rising sun? Oh-whoa. Oh-whoa. You came like crashing thunder breaking through these walls of stone. You came with wide-eyed wonder into all this great unknown. Oh-whoa. Oh-whoa. Hush now. Don't you be afraid. I promise you I'll always stay, I'll never be that far away—I'm right here with you. You're so amazing, you shine like the stars. You're so amazing, the beauty you are. You came amazing right into my heart. You're so amazing, you are. You are... You came from heaven shining bright as God still fashioned you. The beating heart inside me crumblin' at this one so new. Oh-whoa. Oh-whoa. No matter how far you wander for a thousand years or longer, I'll always be there for you, right here with you. You're so amazing, you shine like the stars. You're so amazing, the beauty you are. You came amazing right into my heart. You're so amazing, you are. I hope your tears are few and fast. I hope your dreams come true at last. I hope you find out that it goes on and on and on and on. I hope you wish on every star. I hope you never fall too far. I hope this world can take how wonderful you are. You're so amazing, you shine like the stars. You're so amazing, the beauty you are. You came amazing right into my heart. You're so amazing, so amazing, you shine like the stars. You're so amazing, the beauty you are. You came amazing right into my heart. You're so amazing, you are. You are. Oooh."