Dear Edward:
This is the absolute hardest letter I have ever written in my life, I have tried to tell you that last night we was together but you wouldn't let me, I have tried to speak to you over the past two weeks but you have avoided me, it hurts me that you avoid me and refuse to look at me. And when you do I can see the hurt and disgust in your eyes, they don't sparkle anymore and I hate myself for inflecting pain on you I never meant to cause you pain I only wanted to love you.
let me take this opportunity to say that I'm truly sorry for not telling you in the beginning that the baby is yours. Not giving you the right to have a say in my decision regarding our baby, for not giving you the chance to be the man that I know you are. I guess over hearing your dad that night freaked me out, I got scared so I did what I normal do.
I bolted , like the coward that I am I couldn't face you and by this letter its more than obvious that I still cant , Edward I love you , I never had the chance to tell you that I love you ,I do I love you so much it hurts me, you changed my life and I'll be eternally grateful.
I was broken before I met you and you made me feel whole again, made me feel loved again , made me feel like I can love again. Things has happened to put me in a situation that I'm not sure I can get out of. I married Mike because he threatened me, threaten to destroy my dad's career with information that he has on him and the Mayor I don't want to believe that my dad is a dirty cop.
but I cant worry about him he is a grown man and needs to deal with what ever his consequence are, he also threatened me with hurting you and destroying your chances of becoming a surgeon, he threatened to have Alice beaten to an unrecognizable corpse, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything were to happen with the people I love especially you Edward. Mike raped me and broke my wrist I'm afraid for our baby.
Yes Edward I'm still pregnant with your child. And if you still love me I need you to save me, Mike and I are supposed to leave Sunday for Phoenix I pray that its not to late for us. And I pray we can work this out, if you feel the same please come to me before I leave, I will understand if you cant forgive me or if its to late for us and I will swallow my pride and live the life I chose to live with Mike.
It will be hard but I will always remember one thing. Through every dark night, there's a brighter day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, I will stick my chest out, keep my head up... and I will handle what ever life throw my way for our baby. I love you Edward. I'll love you to the end of time.
Love Always
Isabella
As I wiped the tears the ran down my face I sealed his letter with the hopes that thing can be different. But until that happens I need to prepare myself for the life I chose with Mike, I told him that I couldn't go thru with the abortion and although he wasn't to thrilled he wasn't mad either. he said that his parent s were ecstatic about the baby and would help us in anyway they could after the baby comes.
He held me and told me that things would be ok once we moved, and got started living on our own he would take care of me and our baby. I didn't tell him it was Edward's yea I'm fucked up he does think the baby is his, he's been super sweet to me he hasn't hit me or been nasty since that day with my wrist. I guess he was just under a ton of stress with the Scout coming to see him. Maybe things would be ok and my baby would have some kind of family.
I will commit myself to my marriage even if I'm unhappy the only thing that matters in my life his him. I gently patted my stomach. isn't that right baby you and me against the world. With each day I was greeted with sorrow and happiness . Sorrow because I'm letting go of the love of my life unless he happens to feel the same way about me and saves me , but happiness because I still have a part of him and will cherish our baby in all the days to come. Mike isn't my ideal husband and I cant stand the sight of him for everything he has done to me and put me thru but I would make it work for my baby and now suddenly I was looking forward to leaving and starting my life and Having my baby.
Alice called me after school today I had been avoiding her and she tried to keep her distance but she couldn't stay away and neither could I, Alice is my best friend but honestly her loyalties lie with Edward he is her brother , that's why I haven't told her about me having the baby. she invited me to her graduation party, she said it was gona be a blast and she had something to tell me. I wanted to tell her about the baby. But I guess we'll see how things go . I told her I would stop by. I tucked Edward's letter in my jacket and prayed for the courage to give it to him.
The Party~ the beginning of the end
Bpov
I told Mike that I was going to go to Alice party I had expected him to get angry or tell me I couldn't go but he didn't he told me to have fun and he would try to make it but he doubted it since had plans with his football buddies tonight. Last Hurrah before we settled in to our life as a married couple expecting a baby, with the news of the baby he was actually becoming more loving and caring towards me.
I mean he still bought me shit. But he would come over after school before his workout and lay on the couch rubbing my belly, or he held my hair back when I vomited a few times, I guess in another life he could have been a decent guy if it wasn't for the rape or the threats or the abuse I could get used to being with him and maybe being happy.
Thursday was uneventful and Friday Mike and I told him about us being married and about the baby and that we were leaving on Sunday. Charlie never really has anything to say . Emotionally closed off my mom always used to say .But he did say that he would miss me and he always knew that I was to much like my mother. I wasn't a small town girl and he wasn't shocked that I was leaving to go back home he had expected it and he was glad that I waited until I graduated High School.
Never the less he was speechless about the baby and that I was following my mother and his foot steps with getting married and having a baby and he just said that he hoped I wouldn't live my mother's life but Mike assured him that we were going to be fine. He just shrugged his shoulder's and said we'll see. Thanks for the vote of confidence dad. Really.
So here it is now Saturday and almost time for Alice's party. Dressed already wearing jeans and a tank, I breast feel fuller I just hoped that no one would notice , I haven't really gained weight and my stomach is still pretty much flat. thank god for all those weeks with Billy Blanks and that fucking boot camp workout that Alice had did , it left me with the flattest stomach ever and even though I don't do the crunches any more and I'm about 3mos my little peanut is just that still a peanut and by the time I start showing I'll be long gone.
I curled my hair a bit and applied a touch of makeup gave myself the once over . And began to contemplate whether I really want to go or not. I have serious butterflies in my stomach besides the letter to Edward that is burning a hole in my pocket. I'm not sure what I expect the outcome to be when he reads this letter. Maybe he wont even go, I'm sure that his sister told him that I was going to show up. Maybe he hates me enough that he wouldn't care if I was having his baby or not . Well I guess there really is only one way to find out. I grabbed my keys shut my light and headed down the stairs and out the door to head over to .
Epov
Here I am in the kitchen of my parents house slinging shots of JD with Emmett. My brother is hilarious when his ass is drunk, although he is twice my size he cant hold his alcohol. So as we toss them shots back the fact that he cant drink or he must not remember that I cant out drink his ass out any day of the week. he grabbed me in a bear hug.
" I cant believe that your fucking leaving again dude" I hated when he called me dude but it was better then him fucking calling me Eddy I hated that shit more.
" Em we been over this already I got to get back to Italy. My studies you remember"
" huh. What you say " he looked at me confused as he lifted the shot glass to his lips must be the liquor hitting his ass
" studying to become a Doctor " I chuckled to myself I would miss his crazy ass
"oh yea you're the shit man , youngest doctor around right" he slapped my back pouring us to more shot and clinked the glass together
" Eddy you're my idol" he bellowed out as he slammed his shot glass down on the counter
" and your mine " I slammed my glass down just as hard
" you're the fucking best don't ever forget that shit" he hugged me again
" so are you Emmett the fucking best" I did love my brother and when he was drunk his emotion would come out, I had to get out of here before he started crying. I smiled I didn't want to see him cry, he is a big baby and it would dampen my already fucked up mood.
" what about the hot chicks you told me about over there" he grinned that stupid Emmett grin
" yea Italy has some pretty fine looking woman" I shrugged my shoulder's I had my share of sampling them when I was there.
" maybe I'll take next semester off and take a trip and test the waters " he laughed yea his ass was most definitely drunk
" well Forks has some hot women to" he looked at me as I pointed to Rosalie and her skin tight skirt, with her tits bursting out of her barely there top.
"yea that's my girl , she is sexy isn't she" Emmett was in love with her and his talk about other woman was just a front so he wouldn't think I thought he was pussy whipped. he grinned as she sashayed over to where we were, yea buddy your not whipped , sorry to tell ya its to late Em I already know that your ass is whipped by Rosalie and her pussy. I laughed but he had no idea what the hell I was laughing at. I downed my last shot with him.
" hey Rose, Excuse me guys but there's a bottle of Patrone with my name on it" I made my way to the bar that was set up in the living room . Alice had been throwing these parties since eighth grade, and I swear every year they got bigger and bigger.
Talk of the town, and she loved all the attention. I loved that chick, she is first girl I gave my heart to my sister, I love her more than anything in this world , and that's why I asked her to go to back to Italy with me, I couldn't leave her behind again not after everything I knew about what was going on with her when I left the first time . I even took the liberty of setting her up in the finest fashion school in Milan.
She was ecstatic to say the least fashion is her dream, that girl is going to rule the world or at least take the fashion district by storm, and fucking Jasper he was like my brother he loved her more than words can express the way they looked at each other was sickening and he couldn't live without her so he asked her to marry him, of course she said yes that freak couldn't live with out him either so yea he'll be following Alice and me to Milan in a few weeks after he get all his shit transferred from Texas State.
Emmett and Rose were going to Seattle State for now she is still waiting on some Model Agency in New York but that guy will follow her any where so he may end up at Columbia University for all I know. As for Bella fuck I didn't know didn't care and didn't want to know her plans what we have is over and done if I never see her again it would suit me just fine. I took my time heading across the already crowded living room towards the dancing all over the placing cock riding all thru the songs that blasted out the speakers. Glancing over the dry humping going on I was glad that my parents were out for the night. Damn the under dressed skanks are out deep tonight and fuck me they were already lining up for me. I flashed my million dollar smile at a few of them as they eyed me up and down. I had to admit I looked fucking good in my low rise jeans and fitted green fitted tee that made my green eyes shine more intensely , my sex hair in a carefully done Mohawk .
During one of my drunken stupors last weekend , a true moment of weakness I got my ears pierced as well as tatting my body yea I was having a bad boy moment but I have to say I'm pleased that the ladies seem to enjoy my new look so I cant complain as for the tat they may get lucky to see if it , if I'm hot enough to show it .I chit chatted with the bar tender as she poured my double shots of Patrone. I felt some one grab my ass I turned to see who it was
" hey big brother are ya drunk yet" I smiled at Alice god I loved her so much
" hey little sister I'm working on it " I handed her a shot and clunked the glasses together
" here's to Milan" I toasted to our futures
Tequila my all time favorite drink I loved it straight up but Alice liked to drink it with lime and salt. As we sucked the lime I looked for the salt shaker and looked at the bar tender licking her wrist and pouring salt over it and bringing her hand to my mouth. I laughed and glanced at my sister who was shaking her. I looked up at Ms. Salty wrist thru my lashes as I licked and sucked her wrist. Mostly making a puddle in her panties. Damn Skippy I know the affect I had on women I was taught how to seduce a woman by a seductress in Milan. Alice laughed as we continued doing shot for shot.
" Eddy if you don't stop she's gona have to change her panties" I pulled my sister in for a hug
" they don't call me the panty wetter for nothing" she smacked me in the back I smiled I could tell the bar tender was hot and horny for some Edward cock, maybe if I was drunk enough she'd be honored if I searched for her at the end of the night.
" come on dance with me Eddy " Alice pulled me by the hand.
"Ali I'm not grinding with you" I grimaced at the thought
" you're a fucking idiot. I don't wana feel my big brother's wiener against my ass"
" ohh Ali I don't have a wiener I have a big fat cock" yea the Patrone was finally kicking I was lucky I would pass the fuck out until our flight in the morning I licked my lips and smiled at the bar tender o yea she was most definitely interested in some cock love
"Victoria " she said as she held her hand out for me to shake
"Edward and it's a pleasure to have you serve me" I turned her hand over and kissed it. Fully aware of how women loved to be treated like a lady.
" oh no Edward the pleasure to serve you is mine, I'm done at 2:00" she smiled seductively licking her big red lips
" I'm sure I'll need a refill long before then" I winked at her as I proceeded to the dance floor with Alice. My sister was quite the dancer and energy poured off of her like sweat. I was dehydrating by the fourth song and was desperately in need of a fucking drink , thank god Jasper showed up and cut in to dance with his love as I made my way back to the bar for a refill on some Patrone and more flirting with Victoria that's what I needed a nice ego booster. I was slamming back my third or fourth fuck it who counting.
" give me another please" I told Victoria
" easy killer you wont have any stamina for the end of the night" I smiled my killer smile
" oh honey I can go all night like a trucker" I laughed as I brought the shot to my lips. Yes the affects of the alcohol was starting to weigh in I turned to face the dance floor to see some chick dancing seductively and gesturing for me to come dance with her. She looked familiar I'm sure she went to school with us. Was trying to think if I had fucked with her already.
I smiled as she ran her hands up and down her body , well if I didn't fuck her in the past the way things looked one would think she had a mirror in her pants cuz fuck I could see myself in them before this night is over. I pushed my self off the bar and heading to her. Boy she wasted no time in grinding her ass against me I didn't feel aroused by her per say but the alcohol always got me horny. As she continued to shake her ass on my dick I started to get into it .
I felt my hands move to her hips encouraging her to keep moving on my cock. Yea that dry humping felt good its been too long since I had some action besides myself stroking my shit every night. I bent her forward and began pushing and pulling her against my jeans. She swung around and threw her legs onto my hips and from the hollering from the crowd chanting get a room, our dancing was indeed dirty, or clothes fucking what ever it was it was hot. I was starting to really feel hot so I stripped my shirt off and she gasped .
" wow that is one hell of a sexy tattoo you got" she cooed as she ran her fingers down my arm tracing my tribal tattoo that wrapped around my bicep continuing down my ribcage spelling out my name extending over my V stopping slightly bellow my waist. I smiled god I loved that fucking tat.
" thanks" I whispered in her ear
"what does it say " she whispered her hot drunk breathe in my ear
" my name , Masen " she slide her finger tips above my waist pulling on my belt loops
" wana go talk some where more quiet" I shrugged to keep from laughing did she really think I didn't know she wanted to fuck me . I could see the lust in her eyes way before she saw my tat and my bare chest.
" I guess, lemme get another shot first you want one"
" yea sexy what ever your drinking is fine" I made my way back to the bar asked for my shots. I waited as Victoria poured them I could see the lust in her eyes as well fuck me so many horny women surrounding me and I had such little time left here.