Hello all! I'm sorry it took so long to update. I got mad outlines for this piece so it shouldn't happen in the future. Probably. Also, just so it doesn't throw you for a complete loop, every three chapters or so I'll be switching POVs between Katniss and Peeta. Thanks for reading!

Peeta:

I exited the subway and embraced the chill in the air as I made my way to my place. I needed the breeze to calm my nerves before I saw Clove. I couldn't stop my mind from relentlessly replaying Katniss' little performance at the diner.

I knew exactly what she was trying to do, pushing her chest out at me, drawing my attention to her lips, and making me harder with every fictional spin around the pole. I knew this weekend was going to be difficult, but I didn't think she'd try to distract me with sex. Or that it would work.

Inconvenient emotions. Irrational lust. It's how we always joked around with each other; but now more than ever I wondered if the joke was that she knew how easy it was to manipulate me because of the way I felt about her, or if she was still clueless and believed she couldn't get a rise out of me unless she came up with something particularly raunchy.

I had to stop thinking about fucking her; right now I was supposed to be focused on blind violence and trauma. It was a stroke of luck that I had gotten through to her a year ago; I had no idea what the first anniversary of the accident held for all of us. Finn couldn't get her to let him into her apartment last night so I had to make up some excuse to get over there early this morning. She was still in one piece, but the combination of her red-rimmed eyes and the lingering smell of sex in her apartment did nothing to ease my worries. Johanna was on watch tonight and had managed to get Katniss to agree to meet up for a drink, which was reassuring even though we all knew Gale was lurking around in the periphery waiting to self-destruct with her.

I walked the few steps up to my door and struggled to fish my keys out of my pocket. My apartment used to be the one place she could always find me. Even before the accident, when her and Gale were passionate and hell bent on destroying each other, yet relatively normal, she'd end up on my doorstep clad in a flimsy dress and little else, shivering. Now my home was the place I shared with my insatiable girlfriend. A place where Katniss only left anxious, creased notes on my doorstep when she couldn't sleep and she'd walk miles of the city by herself.

I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket. Johanna.

"The eagle is nursing her gin and tonic. I repeat: the eagle is nursing her gin and tonic."

I chuckled slightly as I pushed the heavy door open, a bit early for Jo's part of the plan, but I knew she was having as hard of a time staying away from her as I was. As long as the night ended with greasy food and bitching about our co-workers instead of an empty handle of whiskey and a couple of pills next to a catatonic Katniss, we were in the clear.

After take out and a few beers, Clove heads out into the night, meeting up with someone I only vaguely remembered. Honestly, I couldn't find it in me to give a shit. She dabbled in both genders, but I knew she'd always come back to me. I met Clove at NYU and while I only hung out with her and her group of friends freshmen year I found that she emerged post graduation far more tolerable and willing. The last couple of years have been tempestuous and stimulating and I found that she was the one woman who stuck by me throughout my evocative career as a "misogynist smut peddler" (Katniss' words).

Almost everything about my writing is sexual in nature. It sells and I like to please. What most people don't get is that I am always the reluctant, wide-eyed heroine in my novels, trying to keep up with the sexually deviant and promiscuous lead character. It grieves me that more men don't know the pleasure of being submissive, of surrendering to their partner's every whim and fantasy.

Some part of me always wonders if that is why I am so attracted to Katniss, even as just a loyal confidante and friend. When we were little, she was never afraid to boss me around. I have a distinct memory of the two of us in sixth grade, partnered up for some science project. We were meant to go out into the woods, which was somewhat of a feat for a group of inner city kids, and identify the different birds we saw along the way. Once we got to the woods she quickly informed me that there was no need for me to join her. She knew all the birds and their calls by heart; I'd only get in her way. I'd already followed her upstate, so I merely shrugged and sat on a large boulder near the lake bordering Madge's family cabin and attempted to sketch the day away as she completed the assignment.

I hoped this was the Katniss that I would inevitably encounter tonight, the girl that emerged from the woods victorious, free, and confident. Yet, when I felt my phone buzzing in my back pocket I prepared myself for the worst.

"Jo, SLOW DOWN!"

"I'll fucking SLOW DOWN when you stop yelling at me!"

She had a point, and I attempted to calm my voice, "Sorry Jo, I just thought everything was going well… and we could avoid…"

I paused, running my hands through my hair as I walked swiftly out of the subway station

"I thought we might be able to escape this one."

I heard a weary scoff on the other end, "yeah, well your fucking brainless my friend."

I picked up my pace knowing that I needed to get to the bar, not really for the inevitably imploding Katniss, but for Johanna. Soon she'd be struck with the fact that she was in a situation she couldn't control and that she actually cared about anyone else, and soon she'd run. I wish I had her common sense.

"When was the last time you saw her?"

I hear here sigh heavily into the phone, "I told you… about a half hour ago. I saw her wash down a pill with her drink while I was at the bar and when she stumbled to the bathroom I stole the prescription bottle out of her purse."

I couldn't help but smile at this, "Thank God you were such a delinquent when you were a kid."

"Yeah, I knew my pick pocketing skills would be useful for something other than stealing six packs from Stop N' Shop."

As I rounded the block of the bar I paused and finally asked for the answer I really didn't care to know, "So what does the bottle say, Jo?"

"It's her mother's Lorazapam."

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose with my fingers, "Well, at least she'll be pacified."

"Yeah, big scary Kat is going to be a fucking mewling kitten once it kicks in. It should make it easier for her to get over her guilt before Gale picks her up."

"You're kidding me."

"I may have pocketed her cell phone. Drunk Katniss is really fond of emoticons."

"Yeah," I exhale, walking faster towards the bar, "for an editor she was also sort of horrible with words."

I'm almost there when I hear Johanna speak slowly into the phone, "Please get here. I have to leave. You're so much better at this shit." She pauses, whispering, "I can't see this. I can't watch it again." She abruptly hangs up.

I didn't even need to make my way into the dingy bar to find my target. Though it was nearly imperceptible, I could make out the end of her braid whip around the side of the bar. I sauntered towards the ally way but stopped myself short.

There she was, the girl I had fantasized about for years pressed up against the guy that left blue and black handprints on her arms and thighs in an ally. She was pushed against the side of the building as he ground his hips into her. I thought of charging towards him, slamming my fist into his face until he stopped, but I couldn't avoid seeing the way she ground herself back against him.