Chapter 22
He stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind him. Leaning his back against the wall, he slowly slid down to the floor, tears streaming down his face. He wrapped his arms around his knees, hugging himself tightly as he sobbed, just as she had the night before.
What the hell had he just done? He abandoned her when she needed him the most. What kind of friend does that? She doesn't know who she is and shouldn't be left alone, and he walked out on her. He just prayed that the cameras had seen and that someone was on the way to fix the damage he caused. He hated himself, and if the others were watching and saw what he had done, he wouldn't blame them if they hated him too.
He glanced up to see the boys hurrying down the hall towards him. He wiped his eyes, preparing for them to tell him exactly what an asshole he was. He wasn't prepared however, for Ryan to slide to the floor next to him, and pull him into his arms.
"I'm so sorry man. We came as soon as we could."
"Yeah, Bro. You did good by her. She may not see it now, but trust me, when this is over, she'll thank you."
He looked up, totally in shock. They didn't hate him? They felt bad for him? Even after he'd hurt her so badly?
"But I broke her heart. I broke her heart, and then I left her alone."
"No, man, you broke Beckett's heart." Ryan looked at him, laying his hand on his shoulder. "You protected her from herself. You looked out for her when she couldn't. You did the right thing. Trust me, she'll thank you for it."
He looked up at his friends, he knew they were right, but they hadn't seen the way she had looked at him. The love in her eyes, and then the fear, and the hurt. Oh god, the hurt. He would never forget the pain in those gorgeous green eyes if he lived forever. What he wouldn't give just to see her smile again. To hear her laugh at his stupid jokes. To watch her dance around set, singing with her iPod, or sometimes just to the tune running through her head. He even missed the way her Canadian accent broke through and he had to tease her about it. He missed her. His co-star, his friend.
"I just need to get away for a little bit. I can't face her right now."
"Don't worry about it, bro. Take some time, get some air. We'll take care of her. We got this."
"Thanks, guys. I appreciate it."
Ryan helped him to his feet and patted his arm. "We're all in this together. She's our friend too."
He gave them both a small smile and a nod. "I'll be back later, I promise. I just need a bit."
"Take as long as you need. She'll be ok."
"Don't forget, Dr Burke will be here for her first session in about an hour."
"We've got it under control. You just go, get some rest." Espo gave him a slap on the back. "Get outta here."
He slowly walked away as he heard the guys entering her apartment, praying that they could repair some of the damage he had done.