Chapter 23

Kate sat staring at the place where Castle had just sat. Had he really just left her? He said he loved her, or at least she thought that was what "always" meant to them, so how could he just leave? What had she done wrong? It wasn't her fault she couldn't remember her accident, and so what if she couldn't, what difference did it make?

A cold chill ran down her spine.

She couldn't remember her accident. Oh, god! What if he thought she was lying to him again? But this was different, she wasnt running away this time. If anything, she was running to him. Did what she had done back them hurt him so deeply, that even the memory of it made him doubt her? How could she have been so stupid? She knew now, exactly what she needed to do.

Just as she opened the door to go find him, there stood Espo and Ryan.

"Hey guys, I can't talk right now, I gotta find Castle."

"Sorry, Beckett, he just left." Ryan said, realizing, as he saw the disappointment in her eyes, how their friend must have felt trying to deal with her emotions.

"Yeah," Espo said, " but don't worry, he said he'd be back later. Just needed to get some air, clear his head."

Kate let out a sigh of relief, he was coming back. He hasn't left for good, just needed some space. She could do space. Hell, if anyone knew about needing space, it was her. But unlike her, Castle wasn't a runner. If he said he'd be back, he would. He'd never been able to stay away from her for long, and while she used to find it annoying, suddenly it was a great comfort to her.

"So," she said motioning for the guys to come inside, "what brings you two by? Need help on a case?" She asked excitedly.

"Nope, no bodies today. Sorry, chica."

Beckett was disappointed. For the first time all week, she thought she may have been able to do something useful. If this doctor didn't release her soon, she was going to go crazy.

"We just stopped by to see how you're doing." Ryan glanced at Esposito. They hadn't came up with a story for their being there when they ran over after seeing that she was about to be left alone.

"Yeah," Espo said, "Can't we just stop by to say hi?"

"Of course you can," she rolled her eyes, "you just usually don't."

"We'll, you don't usually behave yourself and stay home when you're told to, so we can visit, do you?" Ryan said, giving her a sly smile.

"Ok, ya got me there," she laughed.

Both guys smiled, god it was good to hear her laugh. It wasnt her laugh, it was Beckett's, but it was still good to hear.

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"Oh, sorry guys, I forgot, I have an appointment with the doctor today. He's stopping by to do an evaluation, so they can hopefully release me to come back to work."

"Sure, no problem, Beckett," Ryan said as he reached for the door handle. "We'll get out of here and leave ya to it."

Espo looked at her questioningly. "You'll be ok on your own?"

"I think I can handle talking with a doctor by myself, in my own apartment. You guys are as bad as Castle."

"We do it cuz we care," Ryan said, patting her on the shoulder.

"That, and we're sick of doing your paperwork!" Espo laughed as he gave her a hug.

They both headed out the door, with a quick nod to Dr Burke as they passed.

"Hi, Kate," he said, walking into her apartment, " I hear we have some things to discuss."

Beckett looked at her therapist, whom she had come to trust over these past couple of years, "you have no idea..."