Chapter 5:

After witnessing Harry snarling at the mirror for the umpteenth time Kreacher had subtly ushered him into the living room under the pretence that the house elf had a lot of dusting to do. Grumbling all the way to the couch, Harry slumped onto it, ignoring the tea Kreacher had laid out for him.

They had agreed to meet at the restaurant at seven (Harry refused to have Draco pick him up because he refused to let this be a date). Unfortunately he had been ready since five. He would have stayed at the office longer but bloody Ron had practically kicked him out the door and escorted him to the floo.

At precisely seven he left home, knowing too well that he was going to be a few minutes late. It was a muggle place so he couldn't apparate directly. In his defence Draco had kept him waiting for seven years so really he deserved it just a little. Either way he was in a pretty terrible mood. He could barely find it in himself to feel guilty when Draco actually looked surprised to see him.

"Harry!" he cried, standing up. "You made it." He looked a little awkward, Harry noted, like he didn't quite know where to place himself. It was completely different to the collected Draco that had been teasing him the other day with Ted and Rose. Good. The last thing he needed was Draco in his element. The man could be dangerously persuasive when he wanted to be.

He watched as Draco looked down at his hand like he was going to offer it to shake or maybe he wanted a hug, whatever it was, Harry wasn't going to give him the chance. "I like Indian," he said with a shrug, taking a seat.

Draco paused but with a nod soon followed. "I know," he mumbled to himself. Harry pretended he hadn't heard.

They settled into silence when Draco offered him one of the menus. Harry really didn't have to look but he did anyway if only so he didn't have to meet the grey eyes he knows are fixed on him. It didn't help the way Draco was nervously tugging at the collar of his button down, pulling it just enough that Harry could make out the pale line of his collarbone. If he was looking – which he was not.

He got the Rogan Josh and Draco got the Madras. As they had always done. This really was a terrible idea.

"So, how was work?" Draco asked once the waitress had taken their order.

Harry rolled his eyes. "Really?" he asked settling back in his chair and finally allowing himself to study the man sitting across from him. "That's what you're going to start with?"

Draco shrugged. "It's not like you were putting in the effort."

Harry huffed but he knew Draco was right. "It was pretty shitty, thank you for asking."

Draco nodded. "Hermione tells me they haven't been letting you out on the field anymore."

"Well, did Hermione tell you that I had a field case just last week?" Harry demanded, voice sharper than he had intended it.

Draco sighed. "No, she didn't. We don't talk all that often, Hermione and I."

"Well it was a rubbish case," Harry informed him. "They were just teenagers playing a prank. Took up an entire afternoon though." He laughed drily. "Bet you love hearing that. You can say it you know, I know you're thinking it."

"Say what?" Draco asked looking genuinely puzzled.

"I told you so," said Harry. "You were right, I should have quit ages ago. Hell, you actually told me back when I was training and I ignored you. Look where it got me."

"Harry, you're one of their best aurors, they're grooming you to be Head Auror. I'd say you did pretty well on the force."

"They offered me Deputy Head, you know. I'd get my own office and everything." It had always been fascinating to Harry the way Draco could just school his face so easily into a blank mask that would give nothing away. He had asked once and the blonde had just shrugged, putting it down to a lifetime of practice. He was taking in Harry's words now with that same expressionless face that Harry despised so much. "I suppose you think I should take the job then, climb up the ranks and all."

Draco's eyes flashed. "I want you to do whatever makes you happy, Harry."

"That's bullshit and you know it."

"Fine," Draco snarled and Harry watched in satisfaction as the mask was ripped away. "What do you want me to say? That you might be the best goddamn auror they have on that force but you're fucking miserable and that is the last thing I want. Of fucking course I don't want you to take the position. Not if it means throwing your life away."

"I wouldn't be throwing my life away, not if I was helping people," Harry told him, flicking his wrist so they were engulfed in a subtle silencing spell. They were in a muggle restaurant after all and even if Draco was able to keep his voice down to a silent hiss there was no guarantee they wouldn't start shouting at each other as the evening wore on.

"If you could stop being a bloody-"

"-martyr for one minute, Potter," Harry finished in Draco's absurdly posh accent. "Yes, I know, I've heard it all before."

Draco sniffed. "Well if you knew what I was going to say, Potter, why did you ask?"

The waitress reappeared with their food just then and Harry let out relieved sigh. It would be difficult he supposed to try and explain to Draco that all he had really wanted was to get a rise out of the man. Which, now that he thought about it was probably not healthy.

There. This relationship was not healthy. He could probably write a novel on all the reasons why. Maybe he'd even sell more copies than Draco. We're too competitive, he thought, smiling to himself. That's definitely one of the reasons.

"Food's good," he said, humming contently.

"Still talking with your mouthful, I see," said Draco primly. He placed his fork down and dabbed at a bit of curry at the corner of his mouth. Harry tried really hard not to track the movement or notice the way the other man's tongue darted across his lips before disappearing.

Draco caught him staring and Harry could see him ducking to cover his stupidly smug smile. Just to spite him, Harry left his elbows on the table and continued to talk with his mouth full.

"So, how long are you in town?" he asked over another bite. "Teddy never mentioned it."

The way Draco's eyes darted up from Harry's lips to meet his gaze was almost guilty. Like he hadn't just been staring because of Harry's poor table manners but for entirely different reasons. "I uh- I've decided to move back here, actually," he said, frowning down at his food. He looked like he was blushing but then again, spicy food always made him flush. It was actually part of the reason Indian was Harry's favourite although he would never admit to it. "Permanently," he heard Draco add and that was when it clicked.

He almost choked. Draco was half out of his chair, probably all set to do the Heimlich on him but he brushed the other man's hands away and dove for the water. "Here?" he managed to gasp. "Permanently?"

"Mother can't look after the Manor alone anymore and I'd hate to make her leave," he said, still looking worriedly at the glass of water in Harry's hand. "Besides, there really isn't anything for me in France."

"What was there for you in the first place?" Harry asked. He knew some of the details of course through his friends and families talking (only on the occasions they forgot Harry was in hearing distance) but he was genuinely curious.

"I lived with some of my mother's cousins for a while," he said, staring pointedly down at the last bits of rice and curry on his plate. "I- I needed some time away from England you see-"

"Away from me," Harry couldn't help but add.

Draco nodded. "After about a year I decided to work at a muggle school." Harry raised his eyebrows at that. "As you can imagine, that didn't go down well with my cousins but they let me be. I quite enjoyed it actually," he said with a soft smile. "It was a small town by the alps. I taught the kids English by day and worked on my novel in the evenings."

"For seven years?"

Draco finally looked up at him. "They were seven of the happiest years of my life, Harry," he said but the smile on his face was tinged with sadness. It's all Harry needed. He had come to this dinner for closure, for a reason to move on and here Draco was, handing it to him on a silver platter. While Harry had spent the past seven years dealing with mind healers and crying himself to sleep at night, Draco was having the best years of his life.

He waited for that feeling of freedom, like a yacht that finally had wind under its sails but it didn't come. Instead all Harry could feel was bitter disappointment and a simmering anger.

Something must have shown on his face because Draco reached over for his hand that was still sitting by the glass of water. Harry snatched it away, twisting it into a tight fist on his lap. Draco's hand lingered, before drawing back slowly only to drum a soft rhythm on the tabletop.

"I was truly happy, Harry," he said like he wanted to twist the knife in Harry's gut just a little bit more violently. Harry refused to meet his eyes. "I was finally free from all their expectations. My name couldn't follow me there and-" he patted his left sleeve. "They all thought this was just some stupid tattoo I had gotten as a teenager to spite my parents. They would actually look me in the eye and smile when they saw me buying groceries-"

"Alright, okay, I get it," Harry cut him off sharply. He prodded at the last bits of curry half-heartedly. "You were happy."

"That doesn't mean I didn't miss you every single day." That caught him off-guard. He jerked his head up and frowned at Draco who just shrugged. "I wanted to be happy with you."

"We were happy," Harry told him frostily. He watched Draco flinch and it was oddly satisfying.

"Maybe at first," Draco said at last. "But you have to admit those last few months, all we did was fight."

"We could have worked it out!" Harry hissed, fighting to keep his voice low. "You didn't have to leave! Merlin, Draco, you made Pansy come in to collect your stuff and then I never heard a word from you until that stupid owl last week!"

"I'm sorry," Draco said and Harry might have missed it if he wasn't watching the words form on Draco's lips.

"Okay, so you left," Harry continued, "but you could have come back! You could have walked back in at any time!"

"No, not till I was sure-" he stopped like he was trying to figure out how to say something. "We rushed things last time Harry, fell too far, too fast and neither of us was ready for that."

Harry wanted to scoff and tell him that was the biggest load of bullshit he had ever heard but he knew the man had a point. Harry had just realized things with Ginny were too far gone to fix and Draco was still trying to pick up the pieces that were left of his family.

"What makes you think things will be different now?" he demanded instead.

"It's been seven years and we've both changed," Draco told him and his hand was moving across the table again like an invitation. Harry just stared at it. "I'm willing to give us another shot, if you are. I still lo-"

Harry cut him off with a hand up before wrapping it tightly around himself. "How do I know there isn't some guy in France you've screwed over and walked out on."

"There was never anyone serious."

"Answer my question."

"You need to trust me."

Harry laughed humorlessly. "And how am I supposed to do that?"

"You did it once before," Draco told him, frowning down at his plate. "After everything I had done, you had every right to hate me but you gave me a chance to prove myself. I could do it again."

"And look how well that turned out," Harry told him bitterly. "I'm so mad at you right now Draco, all I've wanted to do since I saw your stupid fucking face at Flourish and Blotts was take a swipe it."

"Then do it," Draco challenged. "Take a swing."

"I'm not going to fight you, Draco," Harry told him, barely suppressing an eye roll.

"Harry," Draco looked up at him again, voice gentle but severe. "Has it ever occurred to you, you stubborn fucking git that I actually wanted you to follow me? I wanted you to fight for me to stay."

"You made it pretty clear you didn't want to see me." Harry knew his voice sounded hollow but he was just drained.

"And since when have you ever done anything anyone told you to do."

Oh. Oh.

Harry didn't know what to say to that because he had never really considered it that way. Every time he had thought about port keying to France, catching a plane, hell even flying there on his broomstick he had remembered Draco's face as he had stormed out of their home. I'm done, Potter. Don't you dare fucking follow me.

Those words had played in his mind over and over again, every single day and yet he was finally seeing the challenge in them. Don't you dare, he had said and Harry had just ignored it.

"Can I take these away?" asked the waitress, smiling down at them once again. Harry found himself nodding weakly.

They stared at each other as the girl cleared the table. Draco was the first to look away. He traced a finger lightly around the edge of his glass of wine and Harry tracked the movement. It was oddly soothing.

"You know what really used to piss me off?"

Harry shook his head.

"Every single time Teddy used to visit all he could talk about was how amazing his godfather Harry was or how he loved France but he wished Harry could be here with us." Draco smiled, still staring down at his glass. "It was always Harry this and Harry that."

"Yeah?" Harry asked, finding his own face breaking into a smile. "Every time he left for his holidays I missed him so much it hurt but then when he'd finally come back home, all he could talk about was his cousin Draco. He'd have his hair platinum blonde for weeks and start every other sentence with 'but Draco said'." He laughed. "It used to drive me insane."

"I think it was all some grand scheme to get us back together," Draco announced, sitting back in his chair and grinning broadly. He looked kind of stunning.

Harry rolled his eyes, even as his heart took to doing somersaults. "Ted may be a lot of things, Draco but he is not sly."

"I don't know, he is descended from the Most Ancient and Noble House of Black," Draco said with a shrug. "We could still make a Slytherin out of him."

"His father was in Gryffindor," Harry huffed, trying to sound offended.

"He is brave," Draco hummed thoughtfully. "And I doubt he values knowledge enough to be in Ravenclaw…"

"I don't know, I think he could be a Hufflepuff," teased Harry. He tried to hide his smile as Draco's face morphed into one of horror. "Tonks was in Hufflepuff and Ted is so incredibly loyal. Not to mention, his favourite colour just happens to be yellow."

Draco scowled. "You're bluffing."

"Ask him."

"Oh, I will," Draco assured him. There was something in his gaze, a kind of intensity that made Harry twitch uncomfortably.

He was just about to tell Draco to spit it out because it was obvious the man still had something left to say when he noticed their waitress hovering nervously around their table. "Can I get you any dessert?" she asked when she noticed his gaze.

Draco gave him a questioning look and he shook his head. "It's getting late, isn't it?" he asked instead, feeling that drained feeling from before returning.

Draco glanced down at the sleek golden watch on his wrist. "Oh, it's almost half past ten." Harry nodded and asked the woman for their check.

"So, I guess I'll be seeing you around then," Harry said once they had gathered their coats and stepped out of the bright lights of the restaurant. Despite the cold it was kind of a relief because he was staring to feel self-conscious what with the way Draco's eyes didn't seem to leave him. The streetlight was dim enough to hide his growing blush he figured.

"Ah, about that," Draco said, running a hand through his pale hair and suddenly looking nervous. "I've been invited to the National Magical Literature Awards gala Tuesday night, ah my book-Forget me not- apparently it's been nominated and well- I was hoping you would if you're free-"

"Draco…" Harry began, trying to articulate how badly this might go.

"It's not- I mean I'd like it to be but it doesn't have to be a date," Draco pushed on, still looking a little off-balance but also determined. "You inspired me to write the book in the first place so it's only fair that you accompany me."

Harry didn't say anything, just stared.

"Also there really is no one else I'd rather spend the evening with," Draco added.

"Is no one else good enough company for his Royal Highness?" Harry teased lightly.

"No one else looked twice at me before I was a literary genius," Draco shrugged nonchalantly. It wasn't hard to see that there was still pain there.

Harry made his decision in that instant. "Well I can't exactly pass up the opportunity to accompany a literary genius now can I?" he asked with a small smile.

He was greeted with the sight of Draco beaming down at him. A look that was gone as soon as it had appeared though and Draco was staring again in that too intense way he had adopted in the restaurant. Harry swallowed as he saw the grey eyes dilate and he knew exactly what was coming. He knew what Draco looked like when he was about to kiss him because he had that face memorised so he could replay it over and over again over the years (when he was feeling particularly masochistic of course).

Draco's tongue darted out across his lips and he took another step forward so they were practically toe-to-toe and Harry could feel the scratchy wool of his coat. Before he could lean in to close the gap between them Harry ducked back, trying to ignore the way Draco's eyes widened just a fraction and then his face fell in disappointment.

"I guess I'll see you Tuesday?" Harry said with a tight smile.

"Tuesday, of course," Draco mumbled, blinking at him before staring down at his shoes. He was just about to apparate away when the man called for him again. "Harry…"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you," Draco told him with a small smile. "For agreeing to meet with me. I truly am sorry for the way I ended things."

Harry nodded and apparated before he did something stupid like rush back over there and kiss him.

7 years ago

So things hadn't worked out as he had planned. No surprises there.

The butterflies in his stomach as he waited for his boyfriend had soon twisted into knots as he spotted the tall, thin figure, talking animatedly to Draco as the two made their way towards the Café. Harry barely had a chance to think it through before he pulled the invisibility cloak over himself and ducked in after them.

It wasn't one of his brightest ideas. Not by a long shot. He couldn't help but feel like they were in sixth year all over again as he took the empty booth behind Draco and his dining companion.

Theodore Nott. No wonder he had wanted to keep his identity a secret. Harry himself had been tasked with bringing the man into questioning about the whereabouts of his father. Nott Jr might not have played a part in the war but Nott Sr had been at Voldemort's side from the beginning.

It all became too much when Nott leaned in and whispered something to Draco that had the blonde laughing, tilting his head back as he did so. His hair brushed lightly against the back of Harry's neck and Harry dug his nails into the table. It was too much.

He waited for Draco at home, pacing up and down the entrance hall, getting more and more worked up as the minutes ticked by. When the fury and jealousy threatened to consume him he let it happen.

It took all of three seconds for the lock to click and for the door to swing open. That was precisely how long Harry gave him before he pounced. He barely registered Draco closing the door behind him before he had his hands grasping at the other man's collar and he was shoving Draco savagely against the wall.

"Theodore fucking Nott, Draco, really?" he demanded only then aware of the raggedness of his breathing.

Draco said nothing but there was fury unmistakably etched into every line on his face. His eyes, those gorgeous grey eyes that were glaring defiantly down at him danced with that fire Harry loved so much. And he did love it. Like he loved everything else about Draco. He wanted nothing more than to kiss this man he loved so dearly but he was nothing if not stubborn.

"I'm supposed to be sending his father to Azkaban and you're, what? Jogging buddies? How long have you been seeing him, Draco?"

"Theo had no part in the war," Draco spat out each word like it was an insult. He surged against Harry's hold, trying to throw him off but Harry was having none of it. He pressed in further, holding him in place.

"If he's so innocent, why is he hiding?" Harry slammed a fist into the wall by Draco's head, reveling in the tiny jolt the man made beneath him. He could feel the fury rising now and mixed with the jealousy it was almost revitalizing.

"He's hiding because he knows the aurors won't believe him when he says he doesn't know where his father is," Draco answered at last, voice flat without emotion.

"Bullshit," Harry yelled, hoping to get some sort of response from the other man. Draco didn't even flinch. In fact he stood up taller as though to remind Harry that he may be lean but he still had two or three inches on the auror.

His face was a mask and his chin was held high. "Believe what you will, Potter."

And that hurt. The only time he was 'Potter' anymore was during their playful banter and it was usually said with a fond exasperation. There was none of that now. Only spite.

Well Harry could ride it out. He could make Draco see that they were back to deceiving each other and lying and that was not how things were meant to be.

"Draco…" he began and Draco's eyes arched as though daring him to use his name again. Harry shook his head. "Maybe I followed you because I was jealous but you've been lying to me and I had to find out-"

"You followed me because you don't trust me."

"That's not-"

"Please, Potter," Draco rolled his eyes. "Spare me your excuses. We've been together for almost two years and you still see me as one of them."

"Draco, you know I don't-"

"You hunt them every day and then you come home to me and all you see is-"

Harry shook his head because no this is not where this argument was supposed to go. "You're not one of them, Draco," He tried to hold Draco's face still, to beg Draco to listen but the other man slapped his hand away.

Suddenly the grey eyes widened and the emotionless mask slipped away to reveal that sneer so much like the Draco of his school days, the Malfoy who had stamped his foot into Harry's jaw on the Hogwart's Express. "Oh, but I am!" he drawled and Harry couldn't help his flinch. He didn't miss the flicker of satisfaction and –and something else that may even be mistaken for hurt on the other man's face.

Draco isn't done though. He shoves at Harry and this time Harry relents, moving back a couple of paces and blinking. Draco has rolled up his sleeve and is thrusting the dark mark at him. "See this, Potter? That's right, I know how much you like talking about it. Never mind me trying to move on with my life, our life, together. It all comes back to this ugly tattoo with you, doesn't it? Well take a long, hard look Potter. This is me, after all isn't it? This fucking mark defines everyone who wears it, doesn't it?"

"Draco you know that's not-"

"You're a hypocrite Harry," he spat that last word like it was a threat before throwing his head back against the wall and laughing savagely. "I'm done, Potter. Don't you fucking dare follow me."

When he stormed out of their home a few seconds later Harry didn't follow.

A/N: So this was meant to be up last night but I had a bit too much wine and ended up going out instead. Hope you like :)