I don't own Harry Potter only my Oc Winnie! Also thanks for everyone who reviewed.

Chapter 13

It had been a week since we found out about the night of my birthday and even though Remus acted like he was okay I was certain he was not. Finding out that you assaulted someone with no recollection of it actually happening was slightly terrifying. On the other hand, I knew he was trying to get over what happened and I didn't want to bring it up and ruin everything. So I was definitely in a pickle.

"Do you think I should talk to Remus?" I asked James who was currently trying to charm a flower to sing.

We were currently in charms and Professor Narwegle had decided to take us outside so he could show us how to charm flowers to sing a cheerful melody but because James and I were lazy and tired we decided to sit near a tree and try to charm any flowers we saw there.

"What?" He asked dismissively, flicking his wand and pointing it at the flower.

"I said, do you think I should talk to Remus?" I repeated, staring at his flower that would not sing.

He sighed frustratedly at the flower and put down his wand and turned to me, "Talk to him about what?" James asked, absentmindedly.

James was acting strange today ever since he had woken up he had been in a world of his own, he even skipped breakfast which was something he never did. He loved food, so whatever was preoccupying his mind was slightly worrying me.

I gave him a blatant look, "About the thing that happened last year!" I studied his face intently, "Whats with you? You're so distracted, today."

He ran a hand through his hair and shrugged, "I don't know -I just woke up and I realized that I could die some day - I could die today! I don't want to die not accomplishing something, y'know? I haven't done anything, I haven't seen anything. My life isn't special or memorable I haven't even fallen in love for Merlin's sake! What if I never do? What if I die alone? Do my parents even love me? Does anyone?" He rambled.

I raised my eyebrow at his mini-speech and laughed, "Ah, I know what you're going through. It's called an existential crisis. Basically its that moment where you question if your life has any purpose at all and let me tell you one thing James Potter - you do have a purpose." I said and squeezed his hand before letting go.

He leaned his head against the tree and faced me, "No I don't. How have I contributed to anything? I could die and it wouldn't even matter." he muttered, emotionlessly.

Was he kidding? I couldn't believe he had just said that. Usually I was not one for emotional talks but these days I couldn't help it and something inside me couldn't resist so I said:

"You idiot. That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Of course it would matter- you matter! You don't have to win the quidditch cup or invent a new spell so you can have some value in life. You already have value - James, you're one of the greatest people I know. You have affected people's lives in so many ways - just by being you. Just because you haven't done anything doesn't mean you're never going to. For now, you just have to be the good person you are because soon you are going to doing some incredible things, James Potter."

My words must have struck a cord with him because his eyes got a little glassy and he gulped, "Do you really think so, Winnie?"

Yeah, James Potter was a softie like that.

"No. I think you're going to fail in life and I just gave you that lecture to prove how pathetic you are." I said in the most sarcastic tone I could muster.

He wrapped his arms around me and I couldn't help but hug him back, "Thanks a lot, Winnie." he muttered into my hair and it was such a sappy moment I wanted to punch him. I didn't though.

I laughed awkwardly when he let go, "Okay. Bye," I said and stood up to leave.

He grabbed my arm and gave me a confused stare, "Where are you going you muppet?"

I shook my head, "Eh- I don't know how to deal with emotions so I'm leaving." I said calmly.

He laughed, "I have noticed that, sit back down. We don't have to talk about it."

I tipped my head to the side but complied nonetheless, "What do you mean you noticed?" I asked and hugged my knees to my chest.

He gave me an obvious stare, "Well- every time you get emotional you kind of freak out. Like you don't know how to deal with any emotion that isn't sarcasm or anger. The boys noticed it too."

I clenched my jaw, "You guys talk about me when I'm not there?"

He shrugged, "Not in a bad way, of course. But yes. But you're focusing on the wrong thing here - you need to learn how to not..freak out, I guess. You weren't like this before so I reckon it has to do with Kenneth."

I drew in a breath. He was absolutely right. It had everything to do with Kenneth. I didn't realize how observant James was but now that I knew he knew I felt vulnerable in a way. All because of stupid Kenneth Williams, after I realized he cheated on me it became harder for me to express my emotions. I felt so betrayed by Kenneth to the point that I didn't allow myself to show my feelings to anyone. Even my best friends. I hated that. I hated how he ruined me.

I locked eyes with James, "You're right. I - he kind of - I don't know." I said, sighing and leaned my head against his shoulder. "He broke me."

"Broken things can be fixed, Winnie. Just stop running away from your feelings and face them." he said softly, like he was talking to a child. It was annoying yet comforting in a way.

I sighed, "James, I hate that you're always right - why are you always right?!" I murmured.

He laughed, "It's because I know you too well. Six years is enough time to get to know someone don't you think?"

James Potter. He was going to drive me insane. It bothered me so much how everyone would label him as a 'popular, arrogant guy' and wouldn't try to actually get to know him. He wasn't arrogant, he just pretended to be. James was like the sun - brightening up the lives of everyone around him with his warmth. I wished everyone could see what an amazing person he truly was.

"You're like the sun." I said to him.

He tore a flower from the patch of grass next to him and asked in a pretentious tone, "Hot and blinding?"

I laughed, "Yeah, exactly."

"I think you should talk to Remus."

Before I could reply Professor Narwegle locked gazes with us and her face began to turn red, "What are you two doing? Get back to work! This is not a break or a lounging area, Mr. Potter and Ms. Powers!" She screeched.

I found Remus in the library with Frank Longbottom and some guy I didn't know. books cracked open and each of them writing hurriedly. I assumed it was homework but it could very well be extra work or their idea of fun. I didn't judge. To each their own, am I right? I decided to postpone the Remus talk to until we were alone but now that I was here why not hang out with them?

"Hey guys! How's it going?" I said and leaned against a book case.

Frank Longbottom was the first to turn around and greet me, "Winnie Powers! I haven't seen you in a while." He got up and we exchanged a quick hug.

I beamed, "Yeah, I've been around. How's Alice?" I said, winking.

He turned beetroot red, "So, you heard about that?" he said, running a hand through his hair.

I scoffed, "Heard about that? Are you kidding? I was practically jumping up and down! I told you two were cute together."

Remus looked up, "She actually isn't kidding about the jumping up and down part." He said, smiling. "Hey Winnie."

Frank laughed, "Thanks I think but I don't want to rush things you know? I really like her."

I gave a small wave to Remus, "Hi Remus, anyway. Frank, you have nothing to worry about! I'm positive that she's the one for you. Just do what feels right." I clapped him on the shoulder, "And that concludes Winnie's segment of relationship advice!" I said and sat down on the desk.

Frank grinned, "Thanks Winnie, I'll keep that in mind." His eyes trailed to the unknown guy, "Oh - I'm sorry, this is Edgar Bones. Edgar this is Winnie Powers."

This Edgar Bones guy looked up and gave me an awkward smile, "It's nice to meet you."

Edgar Bones was surprisingly cute, he was a Hufflepuff from what I could tell from his robes and he had this boyish charm that was quite adorable. He was lanky, had thick framed glasses and vibrant green eyes. He reminded me of the characters you would read about in books or something.

I smiled back, "Yeah likewise, Edgar."

Remus eyes darted between Edgar and I and cleared his throat, "Anyway, what are you doing here?"

I shrugged, "No reason. Just wanted to hang out with you cool and interesting people. Is that a problem, Moony?" I asked innocently.

He didn't look convinced but he didn't say it out loud, "No, it's not. You're welcome to hang out with us cool and interesting people for as long as you like." He said with a small smile.

"Yeah, you should know that already Winnie." Frank said kindly, making me smile.

I swung my legs over and got up, grabbing the nearest chair and sitting next to Remus who was opposite of Edgar and Frank.

"Thanks guys, what are you doing anyway?" I asked, putting my hair into a loose bun.

Remus passed me the papers, "We're supposed to do an essay about the aguamenti charm,"

My eyes glazed over the half-written paper and I realized this was the perfect time to impress Edgar with my useless knowledge of things, "Did you write about the etymology? Agua in Spanish and Portugese means water and mente means mind in Latin, so it's basically like using your mind to conjure water." I said and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"No, I didn't. I'm gonna steal that from you now." Remus said and chuckled good-heartedly.

I glanced at Edgar who didn't seem to care about what I had said at all, frankly he looked bored. He grabbed a book from his right and flipped through the pages without giving me a glance. My shoulders slumped and I frowned as I watched Frank engage him in conversation. Why didn't he seem to care? Did I sound too arrogant? Was I sounding too boring? Was something on my face?

"You okay?" Remus whispered to me.

I nodded, "Yeah - yeah, I'm fine." why was I lying to him? "No, you know what. I'm not. Why isn't he interested in me? I am very cool and great." I said annoyed.

"Why isn't who interested in you?" Remus said and noticed where my gaze was at, "Edgar?!" he whispered, confusion evident on his face. His face contorted into a twisted smile and he began to snicker quietly.

I hit his arm to stop his from laughing, "What what is it? Is it because I'm tan? Gee, sorry for having Spanish roots."

He laughed, "Edgar is gay. That's why he's not interested."

"What? I asked dumbfounded, "I'm so stupid!" I said, slapping my hand across my forehead. I felt my face heat up and the bubbling of laughter escaping my mouth. "That's so embarrassing."

He laughed, "It happens to the best of us."

I studied his face and realised now would be the perfect time to ask, "Remus are you okay?" I put my hand on his shoulder.

He exhaled, "I'm - I'm working on it, Winnie. I'm not as good as I could be. But I will be." he said giving me a half-smile.

I nodded, "I get it. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, okay? I know you probably feel like I'm baby-ing you - which I'm not by the way. I just care about you and I just want you to know that. Even if I have to repeat it several hundred times, as long as you know that." I said laughing slightly.

He gave me an appreciative look, "Thanks Winnie and I do know that, I honestly do. But I have to get through this on my own."

"You got it. I understand completely." I said giving him a supportive smile.

"Oi, what are you two chatting about over there?" Frank asked with a lopsided grin.

I shrugged, "Oh nothing we're just contemplating what colour palette to choose for you and Alice's wedding. Light colours or dark? You know what I'll just ask her instead."

He blushed once more, "Quit it, Winnie. That's so embarrassing." he said making everyone laugh.

"Hey, can I be your best man?" I asked, leaning back on my chair.

His eyebrows scrunched together, "You're not a man though?" he asked, mostly to himself.

I scoffed, "Who cares! I could be a great best man! I can get a tux and everything. Besides I want to give a speech. Bridesmaids don't usually get to tell speeches. C'mon, Frank. Say yes."

He seemed to think it over, "Yeah, you know what? Why not. You can be my best man." He said laughing.

I fist-pumped, "Oh yeah! I better get started on my speech. See you guys!" I said getting up, tucking my chair into the table.

Frank's eyes widened in realisation and he yelled while I was walking away, "Wait, have you been planning this?"

"I think you know the answer to that question, Longbottom!" I said loudly.